Strange haunted photo where Winifred looks like she's a painting
I have placed her in a more fitting setting
For the first time in my tenure on tumblr, it's "THAT'S A PHOTOGRAPH?" and not "THAT'S AN OIL PAINTING?"
🩵 avery cochrane 🩵
tumblr dot com
Sade Olutola
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Love Begins
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NASA
Cosimo Galluzzi
Doug Jones
Cookie Run:Kingdom Official!

#extradirty

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The Bowery Presents

Kiana Khansmith
Mike Driver
noise dept.

Origami Around
One Nice Bug Per Day
YOU ARE THE REASON
ojovivo

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@blogofori
Strange haunted photo where Winifred looks like she's a painting
I have placed her in a more fitting setting
For the first time in my tenure on tumblr, it's "THAT'S A PHOTOGRAPH?" and not "THAT'S AN OIL PAINTING?"
there’s definitely a gulf between someone who knows how to play chess and someone who plays chess, but it’s nothing compared to scrabble
specifically, “uwu” is being added to the international english scrabble dictionary, which is apparently a big deal because uuw is a terrible tile combination otherwise
(via @airlock)
The thing about Miss Piggy is that she kind of has a Roger Rabbit comedy superpower where she wins nearly any conceivable fight she's in. But unlike other characters of which that's true, like say, Bugs Bunny, who tend to win because they make the opponent play the game with their rules, Miss Piggy wins because the joke is that she can beat the shit out of literally anybody.
Bugs Bunny beats Thanos by setting up an airport and making him take off the Infinity Gauntlet to go through the metal detector.
Miss Piggy beats Thanos by karate chopping him in the face and sending him flying.
Ice beam is low-key a sauceless "standard" move for its type
Earthquake? That is THE ground move. The ground quakes beneath you.
Surf? A giant wave of water that your pokemon can ride. A thunderous tide. Invokes the ocean.
Thunderbolt? Arcing flashes of electricity zap you.
Flamethrower? Fire breath, fire throwing, an arc of propelled flame is classic.
Ice beam? It's a beam. Of ice. Could've been a gust of frigid wind, or a frost incursion, or being entombed in a glacial slab, but noooooo it's a beam. Of ice.
yes but it goes foowaaaa ting ting ting ting ting ting and i really like that part
Fuck you're right post cancelled
This is the only good post ever made to the utdr subreddits
reminds me of
the shellfish allergy NO NO FUCKING S HRIMP OR HE D IE post
reminded me of this
always some new bullshit in the ocean
Why is it always orcas or dolphins
Why can't a salmon do some bullshit for once
worry not ☝️ they're doing coke
this happens to me every day i dont know how to make it stop
can we nominate him for the Darwin award
Oh thank God someone explained this.
Discworld: Wyrd Sisters Director: Jean Flynn | Studio: Cosgrove Hall | UK, 1997
It genuinely upsets me that there are people who call this animation and voice acting bad, there’s so much heart and soul on display in just this clip alone
At first glance: ‘lol this is going to be one of those hilariously cheap animations’
30 seconds in: ‘…Oh my god this is fantastic’
“WHO DARES TO INVOKE WXRTHLTL-JWLPKLZ?” “Where were you when the vowels were bein’ handed out, behind the door??”
i like when you're petting an animal on the head and then remove your hand and then the animal puts their snout under your hand and flips your hand back onto the top of their head like they're a spatula with a burger patty. so far i have evidence that cats do this and that dogs do this. what else can i learn about this world...?
Redrawing random shitposts before Chapter 5...
Butterflies eating a dead fish.
Do you have any skeletons in your closet?
happy in his blankeyy
What would happen if you got an email
i would check it
You sick fuck.
"🥪" is shorthand for "🍞🧀🍅🥬🍞"
can you people stop reblogging this my notes look like lunchtime
Rating the birds in my backyard by tendency toward violence
Northern Cardinal, 4/10
I'm sometimes worried the male is sexually harassing the female but I'm pretty sure they're just doing some elaborate public pickup roleplay. The rest of us didn't agree to participate in your kink, guys.
American Robin, 1/10
Literally just some dude hanging out. Never bothered anyone but worms. Big fan of the way you just stand there in the middle of the grass like you forgot what you were supposed to be doing.
House Sparrow, 10/10
You're a gang. You're participating in gang violence. There's ten billion of you living in a single wood pile and it's been civil war for three years now. When will the bloodshed end?
Tufted Titmouse, 1/10
A shy baby. A pretty little guy. I saw you on the neighbor's garage roof and time stopped. There were anime sparkles around you. Come back.
European Starling, 9/10
Why is it always you? Listen, I know, I KNOW the sparrows are the problem, and YET. When the fighting starts, it's always you in the middle of it, provoking them and then screaming like you're an innocent bystander defending yourself. I'm onto you.
Carolina Wren, 3/10
This rating is not for physical violence, which you don't engage in, but for your role as an incurable narc. A tattle tale. I know they're fighting again, okay? I see it. Our yard has been a warzone for years, you don't have to make a big announcement every time someone misbehaves.
Eastern Wood-Peewee, 0/10
If this were "birds who think they're better than everyone else," you'd get 10/10.
Red-bellied Woodpecker, 6/10
It's a utility pole. It's not a tree. You're surrounded by trees that are full of bugs. But there you are, on the utility pole. Committing vandalism.
American Crow, unrated
For who am I to cast judgment on the actions of La Famiglia? I assume you are doing what is best for the neighborhood. If I could, though, without criticism, make a single observation. That when large numbers of you gather in the ominous dead cottonwood - no? No, you're right. None of my business.
Great Crested Flycatcher, 5/10
Frankly, I think you could be doing more. I think your name implies a great potential. I think you should massacre the insects. I think your beak should drip with viscera.
Stay tuned for more criminal activity!
(continued)
Common Grackle, 7/10
La Famiglia does not suffer you to stop in our neighborhood long, and I trust their judgement in this manner. You have the look of a guilty bird.
Tennessee Warbler, 2/10
You keep to yourselves, and I respect that. I get the sense that you could defend yourselves if it came to it, though.
Brown-Headed Cowbird, 3/10
You're not a crow, and eventually they ARE going to figure it out, kiddo.
Gray Catbird, 5/10
Would you. Respectfully. Would you shut the FUCK UP.
Eurasian Collared-Dove, 0/10
You're doing great, sweetie, everyone loves you.
Red-Breasted Nuthatch, 4/10
A comedian. A little jester of a bird. You're so silly. Sure sometimes you incite violence in others but, really, is that your fault? If it is, we forgive you.
Blue Jay, 12/10
If you could learn any human behavior you wanted, it would be how to build a bomb.
Honorable mention:
Turkey Vulture, 5/10
You weren't in my backyard, but you WERE eating roadkill in the street in my neighborhood. I know the animal was already dead when you got there, but you get violence points for frightening the small children that walked past you. Incredible work.
This is why Tumblr is good.
I immediately scrolled to the blue jay to decide whether or not I wanted to read the rest of the post. Once I realized that OP got that right, I went back and read the rest. 10/10 OP.
I read this to my dad who sits on his porch and watches the birds and his only note is that he has seen multiple male cardinals attempt to fight their reflections to the death and should have a higher rating.