But I Did It

☆ Ryla | 19 | DC-ABQ ☆ This blog is a mess and so is my life. Message me if you wanna chat.

[criminalizegolf]

> read library book

> it's good

Thank you library

[fiercestpurpose]

> read library book

> it's bad

Thank you library for saving me from buying it :)

[official-library-posts]

official library post

[carolsturka]

actors STOP getting BOTOX it is your literal JOB to move that FOREHEAD

[feldfrog]

For sale: ship of theseus

Condition: used, like new

[skincareroutine]

i love things that come in glass jars because once its over the glass jar is mine

[mortimermcmirestinks]

[cungadero]

i hate viruses so fucking much. literally getting attacked by a fucking shape. a concept. consumes no energy. responds to no stimuli. its only existence is to fuck with you. like fuck offf

[thrice-the-nobling]

prev's tags are too good not to save

[kleefkruid]

cats would be so fucking upset if they understood they were missing out on the ability to lie verbally

[maculategiraffe]

nasa: we're going to shoot three rockets directly at the sun during the total eclipse. for study and research purposes.

me: oh cool

nasa: we have named the rockets apep. this stands for atmospheric perturbations [in the] eclipse path.

me: oh cool

nasa: apep is also the ancient egyptian deity of chaos and darkness, who ceaselessly seeks to extinguish the sun. we launch these rockets directly at the sun in the name of apep.

me: oh... cool?

[mitskisquare]

the only reason why ten year old girls are destroying stupidly overpriced products at sephora to make “skincare smoothies” is because they aren’t being given access to a yard with a variety of mud, sticks, rocks, puddles, and old ceramic planters to make potions in. the children yearn for the apothecary

[terror-billie]

it's a weird emotion when somebody goes "doesn't this just shake you to your core and rewrite your dna and change who you are as a person" and your honest experience of it was that it was ok

[spitblaze]

Cats are great for when you want a little freak to slink around your house

[duncebento]

GRADE SCHOOL SJWS stop using social justice language to explain shit to your conservative parents IT’S NOT GONNA GO THROUGH now all they have are some new words to make fun of. don’t tell your mom she’s being fatphobic tell her she’s being a dick

[theothin]

#Terminology is for when someone has already recognized the existence of the phenomenon#Its a communication shortcut that presumes shared understanding#You need to establish the understanding first

(via @lilietsblog)

[fiddlepickdouglas]

Why don't they make stained glass fish tanks? Give those fish Catholic guilt

[orcboxer]

fascinated by the implication that it's the stained glass that gives catholics the guilt

[science-bastard]

i bend sexily over my lab bench to jot down a data point but my assistant doesn’t notice because they’re too busy drawing little faces on the test tubes and making them kiss

[hellionmutt]

are you anti or pro biotic

pro, let the biotics roam free

[amogus-sex69]

If you're cold they're cold, let them inside of you

[yossyislandd]

okay :)

[yossyislandd]

INFECTION

[swarnpert]

you know that quote "when you have a hammer everything looks like a nail" bc that's how i feel whenever i have a lysol wipe in my hand

[dmitrigirl]

my psychiatrist just diagnosed me with 19th century russian literature character

[greater-than-the-sword]

30 minute recipe? Psh. I can do it in an hour and a half