āthe Romans liked Campania because its very fertile. they didnāt know this was because of its proximity to a volcano - poor buggers found THAT out later.ā
āCrassus gets given command of Syria and high fives everyone in the senate.ā
āCatullus was very pithy, very hellenistic in style. unlike the Iliad, which is 24 books of tedium.ā
āAn Afternoon at Carrhae: the Romans being shot at repeatedly by Parthian cavalry because if thereās one thing the Romans arenāt good at, itās having a cavalry.ā
āItās good to have fast legs in war. Caesar moves very fast, not unlike Napoleon. The Usain Bolt of ancient warfare. Iām not sure why I said that, itās an atrocious analogy.ā
āAthens is the Edinburgh of the ancient world; it has nothing to offer but education and pretty buildings.ā
āShout out to those of you who spent your teenage years playing Rome: Total War.Which is what I did.āĀ
āThe senate go into a panic and they decide to flee Rome at dawn, but some idiot forgets the treasury. I know. Ridiculous.ā
āAgain: donāt use elephants during warfare. Theyāre not as cool as they look. And given theyāre now endangered, itād just be mean.āĀ
āI had to use this meme, Iām sorry. Youāre all aware of the one does not simply walk into mordor meme right? Iām sorry, weāll move on.ā
āI put this photo in for dramatic effect but I realise that itās just a field. I donāt know why people bother going to see battle sites, theyāre all really boring. I saw bones once, they were quite interesting. But most battle sites: boring.ā
āCaesar doesnāt tell Rome anything while heās away in Egypt for a year, so they have no idea Pompeyās dead. All they know is that Antony is being a pain in the ass, which is, in all honesty, not unusual for Antony.ā
āCaesar is very good at one liners. You always draft a pithy one liner before a battle so you have something to say when you win. You donāt want to win and then just be like āwhoo, thank god for that.āā