burritodirge

emmy. she/they. burrito back BABEY.

[burritosong]

[tarragonthedragon]

i just got the "see where your blood has gone!" email from giving blood but it glitched and just showed me my current location. which. theyre not wrong. that is where most of my blood is

[autisticjonathanjoestar]

bouncing on it in repentance

[valtsv]

me, wearing nothing but a sheer plunge-neck ballgown that’s plastered to my skin from the rain, soaking wet and trembling with cold and fatigue as i stand outside the entrance to the castle: p-please help me ;) i’m s-so lost and s-scared ;) ;) i have no where to stay for the night ;) ;) ;)

the sexy vampire lady who answered the door, and to whom the castle belongs: of course ;) you poor thing ;) ;) come inside, you must be freezing… you may stay as long as you need to recover from your ordeal ;) ;) ;)

[whiteroserwby]

You walked up to that house in the rain on purpose

[valtsv]

[vstheworld]

the fuck else would I be sloshing around in a wet ballgown for

[nardacci-does-art]

I drew it…. & animated it…

[kittydealer]

u/differentlifer

[rightlessdestiny]

[tempered-grace]

very funny to me that calories is legit just a measure of energy. you can convert it to joules. (4186 joules in one kcal). really drives home the absurdity of diet culture.

[dollgirllandsknecht]

She has over 4 megajoules of energy.

and this little lady is only 4 Calories

[anphivenas]

Your father use to roleplay as a tape worm for my pleqsure

[cheddar-baby]

hope he did a good job at least. Didn't embarrass the whole family.

[anphivenas]

He strutted his shit kinda

[ispyspookymansion]

i was trying to find this post earlier (duck duck go doesnt find posts well) and i—

[writinginasnowglobe]

i think at a certain point shane would start getting seriously annoyed at the seemingly widespread idea that he's somehow supposed to be "controlling" ilya. maybe it starts off as a lighthearted joke with the way some of their friends will glance at him in anticipation when ilya says something particularly asshole-y like they expect him to tell ilya off. and at the beginning maybe shane somewhat gets it (but really though, he doesn't) because yeah it's his reputation in the league and maybe the rivalry plays a part in it too, especially for people who've never gotten to know him, but eventually, it just starts pissing him off

they're at the kingfisher after a game in new york and scott and some of the other admirals are there along with a majority of the cens and they're all having a good time. ilya and some random admirals player are chirping each other and ilya says something a little mean in the asshole way he does with a small tilt of his lips. and shane can suddenly feel eyes on him from scott and carter and troy and various other players, and for a second he doesn't get it. he doesn't get it, until all he does is snort in response, because well, it was true and also pretty funny and ilya really is the funniest person he knows, okay, and ilya nudges him with a small smile when he hears it, but then the stares slowly morph into something like confused gapes, and all of a sudden, he gets it. it's not the first time it happens and it definitely won't be the last, but shane starts noticing it a lot more and it continues to piss. him. the. fuck. off.

hayden giving him an expectant glance when ilya is half-yelling and groaning with a few cens in the bar at the soccer game on tv, like shane is for some reason gonna tell him to quiet down. scott giving him a quick side-eye when ilya chirps about his age on the ice, like shane is gonna tell him to stop; like he doesn't find the multiple layers to ilya's chirps to scott genuinely impressive, like he doesn't find it amusing. evan, though to his credit he was mostly joking, making a sly comment about shane needing to hold ilya back from fighting during a game, like shane would do that when ilya is well-fucking-aware of when to pick fights and when not to because he is the second-best hockey player in the league; like shane doesn't also find it unbearably hot when ilya has a little blood on his knuckles and dripping down the corner of his lips as he calls out mean little quips at the other team with a smirk on his face

because the thing about their relationship is that shane is undeniably attracted to ilya being an asshole. he thinks it's funny. it almost definitely also turns him on. and he likes when ilya is mean and smug and rowdy and a little shit. he likes when ilya is an asshole to him because that's their banter and their foreplay. he likes when ilya is an asshole to other people because he pretty much always thinks what ilya says is hilarious. (plus it's the fact that shane is also an asshole; it's just that ilya says it out loud more often than he does)

and so the thing about their relationship that, for some fucking reason, other people don't get is that shane, from the very beginning, has always and will continue to like when ilya is an asshole. and yes, they're married (shane also thinks some people seem to forget this, because why would shane marry ilya if he truly doesn't like ilya's personality. he thinks other people are a little stupid sometimes.) but they're also best friends and bond over being the best at what they do and how competitive they are and that they're both a little bitchy at times

long story short, i think that at some point during the first season of them playing together, all of the cens (and various other friends/players) eventually learn, as shane continues to not react the way they expect him to, that shane is THE biggest ilya enabler. he won't tell ilya off or nag him, but is actually probably standing a little off to the side with a tiny little smirk on his lips and hearts (and a little heat) in his eyes as he watches his husband

[writinginasnowglobe]

new 5+1 fic about this out now 😌

he's my best friend (who i think is hot) (11482 words) by writinginasnowglobe Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid Rating: Mature Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Shane Hollander/Ilya Rozanov Characters: Shane Hollander, Ilya Rozanov, Hayden Pike, Ottawa Centaurs Team Ensemble (Game Changers), Zane Boodram, Wyatt Hayes, Nick Chouinard, Evan Dykstra, Scott Hunter (Game Changers), Cliff Marlow | Cliff Marleau, Svetlana Vetrova Additional Tags: Social Media, Twitter, Shane Hollander Loves Ilya Rozanov, Ilya Rozanov Loves Shane Hollander, Married Shane Hollander/Ilya Rozanov, Post-Book 6: The Long Game (Game Changers), Canon Compliant, Shane Hollander is Obsessed With Ilya Rozanov, Supportive Ottawa Centaurs (Game Changers), Supportive Boston Bears | Boston Raiders (Game Changers), Protective Shane Hollander, hockey is sex and sex is hockey and both of them are ilya rozanov, being in love with someone but also being in LIKE with them Summary: It’s like they think that Ilya's someone to put up with, rather than someone that Shane wants to spend every waking minute of his life with. Someone that is, in every single fucking way, Shane’s person. Someone that knows exactly how to make him laugh and someone he doesn’t have to hide his quirks from and someone who allows his own asshole side to shine when Shane wants it to. Shane loves Ilya, is in love with him. It’s just that Ilya is also his best friend. Or, 5 times that Shane gets annoyed by people thinking he's supposed to control Ilya, and 1 time he finally says something about it.

[shanesmouth]

That scene says, “I want you and not just in a sexual way, but I like you, you make me swoon, you make me melt.” I think that's a really interesting layer. (x)

[yellow-cat]

do u think i can go for a run today or is that something only normal people are allowed to do

[thisisdogs]

weird animals run all the time dude

[yellow-cat]

im going to go for a scamper and scare everyone

[catharticscream]

Remember in 2010 when Taio Cruz said "I throw my hands up in the air sometimes"? I appreciated his restraint. You can't just throw your hands up in the air whenever. There's a time and a place, and that time was 2010, and the place was the club.

[pangur-and-grim]

Queer Books and Authors are at a Breaking Point

Authors, agents, publishers: every part of the industry is seeing the strain of five years of escalating anti-LGBTQ censorship.

[pangur-and-grim]

if you'd like to show support, here are some upcoming queer books:

When Life Gives You Corpses is a brilliant YA about a cursed praying mantis who falls for a young witch. Yield Under Great Persuasion is a raunchy, but surprisingly sweet story about two men repairing their relationship. Fabulous Bodies is a horror story about a queer rockstar rising from the dead.

This is Where the Future Bleeds is a fantasy set in a vividly imagined land, where two women (who happen to kiss) are the key to healing the broken sky. You're No Better is a story about a teen struggling in the shadow of his murderous parent. Oil on Canvas is about a woman who finds disturbing paintings in the home of her dead mother.

and then here's a list of 26 queer books by Black authors set to publish this year, and a 10 upcoming books by trans authors. if you want to fight back against queer censorship, use your wallet! or (if that's not an option) you can contact your local library and ask them to stock a copy.

[penelopepennington]

In addition: looking for indie publishers and queer bookshops is a great way to find and support queer authors and stories of so many infinite varieties! (The following suggestions are based on my UK-centric knowledge)

(Some) Queer Presses:

Lurid Editions are "a publishing project committed to intentional and conscientious acts of archival repair". They are "attentive to how marginalised histories are forgotten and remembered, [and] hungry to rediscover overlooked queer books". They've just received funding from Arts Council England to engage queer readers in a project to contribute to the archive!

Cipher Press "We’re really keen on the idea that queer and minority stories are for everybody, and we want to make our books – and the stories they tell - accessible to all" (what an amazing mission statement!)

Anamot Press "Anamot [Անամոթ] means shameless in Armenian. ⁣⁣Anamot Press publishes poetry and prose on intersecting experiences of gender, sexuality, race, migration, class, belonging and loss - with no shame."

(Some) Queer Bookshops

Queer Lit Oh man, I remember when this was just a tiny little shop, and now they're the biggest LGBT+ bookshop in Europe! They do amazing work in donating books about being trans to schools and parliament! They have a pay-it-forward board that will make you sob with its notes of love and support. (You can tell I wish I still lived nearby)

Lighthouse For Scottish friends - "a queer-owned and woman led independent community bookshop. We are an unapologetically activist, intersectional, feminist, antiracist, lgbtq+ community space"

Gay's The Word The OG Queer bookshop in the UK. One day I will make my pilgrimage!!

This really is just a tiny snapshot of all the amazing work of celebration and resistance that's being done for Queer literature at the moment. We live in frightening times, but I promise there is still lots of love and joy and hope out there in spaces like these. Support them in whatever way you can!!

[rohgoreihgiorefdhgirehgreihg-de]

[number1mongrel]

"You hear that? They're saying The Odyssey doesn't even have nobody!"

"They've got nobody in the Odyssey?"

"No I'm saying they don't got nobody."

"Nobody's there?"

"Nobody's not there!"

"So everyone's there?"

"Everybody but nobody!"

[shanesprophecy]

what the fuck was that

[here-for-the-vibe]

I didn’t consciously realize but he really does make So Many Sounds

[klapollo]

you are not a "femcel" you are not a "foid" you are not a "hon" you are a woman worthy of respect and taking up space and being happy and the world is yours for the taking you're ALIVE!!!!!!!!! you're a HUMAN!!!!!!! FUCK what they told you!!!!!!

[tinylilhollander]

David and Yuna are clearing out their attic, and they come over with a box of Shane's old childhood stuff to see if there's anything Shane (but realistically, Ilya) wants to keep.

As Shane and Ilya are going through the box, Ilya pulls out a little Centaurs branded notebook, with "Shane's Fun Facts!" written on the front in sharpie. Ilya is understandably delighted.

"What is this?" he asks, smiling from ear to ear, quickly yanking it out of the reach of Shane who immediately tries to swipe it out of his hands.

"It's nothing," says Shane, but the way his cheeks have gone pink behind his freckles tells another story.

"Uh-uh. It cannot be nothing if you don't want me to see it this badly."

Turning his back to Shane so he can't easily grab at it, Ilya opens to a random page and reads in Shane's 8-year-old scrawl:

Lightning bolts are five times hotter than the sun. That is very hot!

Ilya is grinning even wider now.

"Wow, Solnyshko, that is a fun fact."

"Fuck off," Shane says. He doesn't even attempt to grab it again, just kind of collapses and bonks his head into Ilya's shoulder. "I used to have trouble making friends as a kid. Dad suggested I start collecting facts to use as icebreakers. Y'know, to get conversations going."

"Did they work?" asks Ilya, tilting his head so that it rests on top of Shane's as his husband gives an almighty sigh.

"I think they made it worse, actually."

Ilya turns to another page and reads it out loud.

"Oology is the study of eggs. It's so cool because it looks like there are three eggs in the word!"

"Oh god," says Shane, burying his face further into Ilya's neck.

"I think you knew all the worst kids in Canada," says Ilya, putting down the book and wrapping his arms around Shane. "Those facts would have worked on me."

"Really?" asks Shane, glancing up at Ilya's face to see if he's teasing him, but Ilya is being perfectly serious.

"Of course. You came up to me and started telling me fun facts straight away, remember? 'I don't think you can smoke here.' 'Wow, Rozanov, you are the best player ever to watch.'"

"Fuck off, I didn't say that," laughs Shane.

"Well, it was something like that," says Ilya, pressing a kiss to the top of Shane's head. "So at least the fun facts worked when it mattered, yes? Imagine where we'd be if you hadn't come over to break the ice."

And Shane tugs Ilya even closer.

"I don't think I want to."