MJ

20yrold he/him transexual dyke cpunk / 18+

[butchonaleash]

HRT diary (ftm, tetosterone)

I am beginning this at 6 weeks, 2 days on HRT, age 20 (7th June 2026). Currently on testogel and planning to switch to subcutaneous injection in August.

Firstly, I have never been happier in my life. It only took applying the first dose for the future to become real again, instead of being something I watch through a haze of dissociation as my body marches further and further away from who I am meant to be.

Within the first week I noticed an increase in genital sensitivity and horniness, and within the first 2 weeks I saw an increase in hair growth on my arms and legs. I had virtually NO body hair prior to HRT and I have black hair so just a little change was very noticeable to me!

At roughly a month I even noticed that the hair on my face is thicker and just slightly darkening on my upper lip, which I definitely did not expect. The excitement was overwhelming. My skin is noticeably more porous, and I am sweating BUCKETS. I now understand why pubescent boys wear so much aftershave. Additionally, my voice naturally wants to sit lower in my chest, rather than my throat, although I haven't noticed any breaking or deepening in the pitch itself.

6 weeks in, not a lot of new changes but slow progress in the ones I'm already seeing. Significant growth down below (the tip is SENSITIVE, and it really is growing into your foreskin. You have to clean down there!!!). Also my skin is breaking out, but this time I'm also getting spots on my back and chest - during my original puberty I only ever had them on my face. Not something I hugely care about, luckily. I also noticed that my breasts have shrunken a little.

Frankly, the best change has really just been having hope for life again. I finally want to live!

[butchonaleash]

Looking for: disabled butches opinions!

I am working on a small zine about being disabled and a butch lesbian and would love it if any disabled butches had input on their own experiences with the intersection of both experiences!

[gentlemosses]

what if we cut each other’s hair in the kitchen…….. and we were both butches

11x14in acrylic on canvas

prints

[dyslexicpokemon]

🌱life update🌱

i got my first real packer in the mail yesterday

it’s a mr. limpy x-small

here’s my review of it so far:

best thing about it: BALLS! better than any DIY sock packer you could make. reaching down and having squishy little balls down there is so amazing.

also, because of the cyberskin it’s made out of, the mr. limpy feels incredibly realistic. it’s slightly more detailed than i had expected, even with wrinkles and veins that pop out a bit.

i will say it’s an awkward size for me. i’m 5’3 and skinny, so it looks strange in my pants (although i think it will look more natural to me once i get used to it). on the other hand, it’s definitely too small for masturbating. i like to pretend i’m jerking off, but it’s just barely big enough to put my entire hand around it. (edit: nevermind it took a while to get used to but it’s actually fairly good for jerking off, even though it’s soft.)

last night i slept with it and it smelled super funky in the morning. a quick wash and cornstarch fixed that, but i just thought i should note that it requires regular washes to stay clean and ~fresh~.

i guess the last thing is, i’m having a difficult time figuring out how to pack with it without having a huge boner. i usually pack “up” with my DIY packers, but this one just kind of hangs between my legs. it takes a lot of adjusting to keep it from falling down my leg.

all in all, i think mr. limpy is a great first packer and i’m excited to practice and get better at using it. this is a new step in my transition and i’m very excited about it! :)

[odaatlover]

I’m sorry if this is too personal but has your experience masturbating with your packer been easy? Like is the pleasure slide (I think that’s what it’s called) easy to use? I’ve been looking at getting a freetom packer but I really want a packer I can play with

It’s been easier than before, but occasionally I’ll still have some trouble, but that’s more of a mental blockage than anything. I think the pleasure slide is more meant for if you’re on T, BUT if you’re pre-T you can still masturbate with it, as I do. I can’t say for sure if the pleasure slide works, but when you tug on it the whole thing is just flimsy enough to where some part of the inside is going to come into contact with your anatomy — whether it be the pleasure slide or some spot on the inside of the cup — and while I can’t ever tell if it’s the pleasure slide or not, I’m still getting plenty of stimulation and don’t even bother questioning it. It feels great, and it’s incredibly easy to achieve! Especially since you can do it at any angle that works best for your body and to where everything is situated down there, since everyone is different. Also, you can put a small, thin vibe in the shaft if you want instead of having the rod inside, so that it’s still firm and the vibe touches you as you “jerk” the packer.

The visual is pretty amazing, especially if you’re using packing/STP underwear so you can’t see the “line” of what’s the packer and what’s your actual skin, because sometimes that can ruin it for people. I usually wear underwear and just have it pulled out of the opening in the front so that it looks more like a part of me and hides where it clearly isn’t. And having the rod or something inside makes everything a lot better, so I highly suggest using it even though it’s just solo play!

Hope this helps! Let me know if you have any further questions

[incubuscock]

Ordered an STP packer and harness for it and I haven't quite mastered pissing with it but just wearing it in the harness and jerking off with it is like. Fucking amazing. Even though it's not actually touching my parts at all. I never could get into the hot rod bc it doesn't feel like having a dick, its positioned over the clit which is much farther back than a dick would be, and it's used like a stroker which is not entirely congruent with imagining that it's my dick. Like am I docking myself? Whatever. The point is , this STP packer has a great texture and is giving me insane levels of phantom dick that are way more intense than the hot rod even though that wraps around my real dick.

[spitblaze]

I gotta figure out how to stop thinking about internet transphobia when I'm trying to sleep but as long as I'm here, idk where so many of these people get the idea that we're just sex crazed maniacs who transition only bc we're the kind of freaks who alter our bodies in the name of a fetish and only do anything in order to get our rocks off. Like I'm aware I do not speak for all trans people but I feel like most of us get about as much sexual gratification from transition as most people would from a good haircut, right? It’s very emotionally gratifying, it's nice to look at myself in the mirror now, I (personally) even FEEL sexier, but the process in and of itself does not feel very sexy. I do not bind my chest and jump through medical and legal hurdles for the sexual thrill, I do not froth at the mouth with the idea of taking my T shot every week. A lot of us are horny, yes, but that does tend to happen when you undergo puberty for a second time. It's not about sex, it's about feeling at home in your skin- and that DOES include genitals. Having strong feelings about your own sex organs is not inherently pervert behavior, believe it or not. For me, wanting to have a dick or wearing a packer isn't a sex thing, it's about feeling at home in my body.

I'm aware that a lot of people have made up their mind, and trying to tell them that queer people aren't sex-obsessed robots is like talking to a brick wall. But I think it's worth saying, and also worth remembering that even though transitioning and being transgender isn't a sex thing...sex isn't inherently a bad thing. A lot of these people act like jerking off is Complete Degenerate Behavior and not a completely normal thing to do. It of course goes hand in hand with the conservative ideas about sex being inherently dirty and impure and to never even think about sex unless you are trying to have a child, never mind engaging in kink. The religious/conservative conformist rabbit hole goes all the way to hell. Do whatever you want as long as you aren't hurting anyone else and don't fall for the fallacy of appeal to disgust.

[writingwhatswrong]

INSANE fucking discovery about the bornwear packer holy fucking shit (I think this is like actually a feature and I'm just kinda dumb) but it has this hole in it for your t cock and it's aligned with the shaft. Ans if you squeeze the air out of the shaft and put it on your dick, it suctions and you and jerk on the packer and tug at your tdick. And it's AMAZING. OH MY GOD.

[testosterone-dragon]

an idea for you to consider: sucking each other's packers. Me personally I'd lose my mind (/pos)

Oh i'm considering now mmmm. This is good propaganda for getting myself a packer by the way. Getting back home after a stressful day out, laying back on the couch, legs spread to relax more, only to open my eyes and see you on your knees mouthing at my bulge, feeling the pressure of it against my tdick, the pleasure and visual blurring till it feels almost like you're actually mouthing at my bulge... grinding the packer into your mouth, hearing and even feeling you moan around it, humping the packer and by extension your tongue from how good it feels. Not enough to cum probably, but enough to get wildly horny and show you how much I appreciate your help and such fun ideas.

[jerinmyhead]

u get it u get it. I have gotten very close from jerking my packer off before, i swear i can feel it. Genuinely probably could cum from it under the right circumstances.

U should get a packer they're the best. Never go anywhere without mine #lovemyweiner

[returnofeternity]

mel, who uses a jockstrap harness to pack. sometimes she likes going commando, so you can see her cock flopping in her scrubs when she bounces on her heels. you’re able to see the outline of her packer when she sits down. you’re easily able to access her cock when she tugs her scrubs down after you pull her into an empty room to mess around really quick. she really loves looking down and seeing her packer sticking out of her boxer flap while you jerk her off and kiss her tip. she gets so much butch euphoria when you pull her packer out of her boxers and give her a thighjob.

i just think she'd be a jockstrap kind of butch :p

[returnofeternity]

concept of trinity packing is so yummy trinityyy let me seeee

trinity packing but with a jockstrap 🥴🥴🥴 or with transtape so it can hang and flop around....i know she lovess to see that packer bulge when she's sitting down oh ma godd....probably traces her finger along the outline and squeezes it occasionally. and you know she's manspreading to show it off to you!!!! thinking about teasing one another, throwing sarcastic remarks to get on each other's nerves, only for trinity to spin in her chair and spread her legs open so you get a glimpse of that bulge in her scub pants, which immediately shuts you up.

hooking up with trinity and pulling her pants down to reveal her boxers with a hard package behind it :3 slipping them down, her packer springing up and nearly hitting you in the face. i know deep in my heart she's the type to act like she can feel it when you suck or jerk her off.....she highkey loves when you grope her packer bulge and make little comments about how you can feel her get hard @___@ it gets her going.

smth smth condom on the packer while you're riding her....tearing it off and squeezing the shaft to make her cum inside...

trinity sending you vids of her stroking her packer <3 quick bathroom break that involves her pulling her pants down and jerking it in the stall, quietly moaning out your name.

has most definitely had her packer fall out of her jockstrap 😭 probably was when she first started packing and didn't know what she was doing. thinking about trinity using you as a human shield while she waddles to the bathroom to fix the dick sliding down her pants 😭

[t4ttop]

Mini informational rant: you can absolutely jerk off pre-T boys or boys with little to no bottom growth.

How does one go about this?

Get a toy like a satisfyer or the disgustingly named "womaniser" (some of the models come without a brand name on it) or any air pressure toy which is kind of long shaped. Preferably one with a good amount of settings for pressure (10-12 is good, because not everyone likes intense heavy sucking and some like more stimulation). Phallic shaped is better tbh, because it's easier to do "the motion" of jerking off.

These toys are placed over your dick, yes I'm calling it a dick even pre-T because if you want to actively ease any dysphoria about this potentially affecting these guys you have to name it something they're comfortable with (and if they're okay with clit aka verbally expressed this then by all means go ahead).

Get the toy, make sure the handle of it is placed upwards, place it on the tdick you wish to jerk off and start on a low setting. Check in with your sexual partner to see how this feels, it can be quite a new and awkward sensation at first. If the toy gives too much friction you can add a little bit of water based lube on their dick (very minimal amount). If they like it and have gotten accustomed somewhat you can totally start putting a little more pressure on the toy and moving it either up or down vertically or horizontally (check in with them again for best results). Play around with the settings and increase where necessary.

Always keep communicating. If you have enough trust and feel comfortable with it you can even blindfold them - sometimes this can ease the dysphoria since they do not see the toy and rely on you verbally to set the scene. Tell them how you enjoy jerking them off, tell them that their dick is hard, show them how into their responses you are. Also since this is a suction toy it can have the effect of temporarily making tdick look and feel bigger.

I still personally think there would be a great market for an air pressure toy that looks like a dick, most of the masturbators for transmascs are for those with bottom growth. Bottom growth gives gender euphoria, but we shouldn't be keeping that away from transmasculine people who want that but do not have it (yet) for whatever reason.

Jerk off a trans guy today!

[snowmorashi]

Hi! Id just like to add this for anyone not on T whose journey includes the use of packers or prosthetics. Some STP packers are compatible with erection inserts that include a stroker component on the side which presses against the wearer’s body.

Specifically, the Gen2 pleasure rod from Peecock Products is a fantastic option. It’s meant to accommodate bottom growth, so if T is in your long term plans you should be able to keep using the stroker function, but the best part about this product specifically is that even pre-T the rod provides enough friction against the body to stimulate your dick pre-T. You don’t need any kind of bottom growth to get the full effect.

From my experience the rod isn’t sturdy enough to accommodate penetration, but if you’re just looking for something to ease your or your partner’s gender dysphoria while jerking off this is a great option. Additionally the rod has an ejaculation feature for anyone who enjoys the visual affirmation of a ‘big finish’

There are three style options for these rods, to accommodate different preferences and anatomy, so use your best judgment about which might work for you. The prosthetics themselves are a bit pricey, but the rods themselves are more affordable and could be inserted into other STP packers depending on the size and flexibility.

Here’s a photo for reference. As always, use your best judgment, take your own measurements, do your research. Feel free to shoot me a message if you have questions. Always here to support my transmasc brothers and siblings

[ploverbear]

nsfw tmi post

i know this is a tale as old as time but I never liked jerking off with any lube with my natal anatomy but when I use my packer instead of doing it dry, I've been jacking off using lotion on my hand and its been going insane. The way it glides so effortlessly makes it feel like such a real part of me its so crazy. I cant wait to have phalloplasty so its actually attached to me but this already is making me lose my mind a little

[side-smut]

Turns out that if I place my packer right I can jerk it off while it grinds into my clit.

[channelworldbluez]

Okay so i bought a strap(yes a strap) but like instead of a traditional harness i got the one where it’s briefs and you just put the dildo inside the hole in the front. I went with my gf to get this for the record because I wanted her to pick a size and it was a smaller size anyway when we got home(to the hotel really) I put it on and felt the way I felt when I put on my first packer like I dead ass was just lounging around with it on before we even used it.

I jokingly told my gf that “imma go back to being trans cuz I wanna wear a packer again and that it feels so right.” But look I’m not gonna do that but I also fell asleep with it on. Also was jerking it off in the mirror.

Yes it was black

And realistic

And the briefs fit comfy

Also it turned me on wearing it Chat is that bad?

[aroused-arachnid]

Spider-Man being transmasc is cannon to me lol. I will have to look for a pic but I’ll find one for ya

Details about the toy/idea:

So I have a packed that’s got ridges on the backside off it and you can like rub it against yourself which I did and had a good time but bc it’s a packer it’s behold for the shaft to point down so when I was jerking it it put my wrist in a real uncomfortable position. So the idea I have is I found these like bumpers for putting on a strap and I’m thinking that paired with a dildo. So I can like jerk off with the dildo and use the bumper part to stimulate myself. There’s a few different versions of the bumper and in trying to decide which one I think I will like the best. And the other dilemma is do I just use it with the strapon dildo I have which is not lifelike or would I need one that looked lifelike for this to be successful

-🔱

Literally so real for that, it's now canon to me too and you are Peter Parker in my mind now. You're our friendly neighborhood kinkblr Spiderman.

But ooo that sounds like an interesting dillema :3c I wish you luck in figuring it out!!! I hope you're able to figure it out without much hassle, but don't be hard on yourself if it takes a bit of experimenting!

I don't even know where to start, I'm so bad with talking to people. Uuuuhm, do you...have any fictional characters you identify with heavily?

I also don't feel like you know that much about me lowkey, so you can also ask questions lol. I fucking love talking about myself and my interests

YAYYY! I'm glad! You deserve to feel nice ^_^

Drooling and barking at looking at you with big eyes. Am I weird for thinking you look so good in that? >:3c keeping the picture for my eyes only hehehe nobody else gets to see. It's sfw but still, it's like, hot to me idk why.

[her-knight-clover]

sometimes i think i'd want to wear a strap just to bottom anyways, get one of the packers that's a little bit floppy just to feel how pointless a dick would be for me, maybe my owner would grab it and jerk me off just to coo about how only getting fucked can give me the pleasure i need

...or maybe even a toy with a knot, so i can knot miss's fist while she presses me into the mattress...

(this post is brought to you by the pointless bottom dysphoria i'm having today)