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trying on a metaphor
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
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Claire Keane
#extradirty
hello vonnie
DEAR READER
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@byash
Something I’m very passionate about is spreading awareness and understanding of learning disabilities and conditions such as Autistic Spectrum Disorder (ASD).
It is my aim to become an educational, adolescent and child psychologist, helping those with such conditions.
I will start regularly posting Infographs regarding the facts and figures, traits and other aspects of different conditions.
Being aware and mindful of autistic traits is so so important.
Autistic individuals are people like everyone else, the difference is they are neurodiverse while others are neurotypical. This means that what works for a neurotypical person might not work for a neurodivergent person and vice versa. This is also the case among neurodivergent people as no two are the same.
While many people think quality amongst individuals is what is needed, equity may be more helpful.
Equality means everyone gets the same resources and opportunities. Equity recognises that everyone has different circumstances, meaning that resources and opportunities should be given out fairly to obtain an equal outcome.
It is important to ensure that we can make our world accessible to everyone and not just the neurotypical
new year new me? nah
So many people start their year off with New Years resolutions. I am one of them. Is it easy to break these resolutions not even one month in? Yes. Have I already broken mine? Kinda.
This January I aimed to walk 5k a day. The majority of my work team thought it would be a good way to keep us active during yet another lockdown. To be honest the first few days I really enjoyed it. Then I got bored, cold and tired (the outdoors and I aren’t the best of friends). So there was one resolution up in the air.
There’s always the usual eat better and exercise more, become healthy. While I haven’t necessarily become healthy, I am doing a lot better than what I was before Christmas. Might not eat well or workout everyday but somethings better than nothing, right?
The main resolution or goal I have for this year is to practice more self care. We are currently living through extremely challenging times. Whilst we’re all in the same ocean we’re not in the same boat. Every one of us is experiencing this pandemic differently so I think it’s really important for me to care for myself. Something I’d encourage you all to do as well. When stuck at home, everything can become quite stagnant. Small things such as lighting a relaxing candle before bed or painting your nails can make all the difference.
As January comes to a close, I’m now aware that I don’t want to reinvent myself and become this whole new person. I want to continue growing and evolving the person I am meant to be. To do this I gotta take care of me. I need to learn to be easier on myself and accept any setbacks or failures as stepping stones to where I want to be. New year new me? Nah I’m good where I am right now.
Ashleigh xo
fuck 2020? maybe not...
So for many people 2020 was an extremely shit year. Months spent at home, parties and celebrations cancelled and adapting to a different way of life. While I agree that there’s been some not so great times throughout the year, for me it wasn’t all bad. This year I accomplished so many things I didn’t think possible or had even dreamt about.
At the beginning of the year, I got my social life back. I began enjoying nights out and drinking with my friends again. The hangovers not so much. It seemed as though when I was all about going out, the world shut down. Talk about good timing 🙄. I can’t entirely mad at that. I did meet my boyfriend as a result of lockdown so not all bad. That’s one thing this year has brought that I’m very grateful for. He’s the best🥰.
Boyfriend, love and all that soppy shit aside, I’ve accomplished a lot this year. I graduated from uni, which I am so proud of myself for doing, especially during a pandemic. I also started a masters, which I almost gave up. The experience and expectations of the course were far more challenging than I had anticipated. Thankfully I stuck to it and I have now completed my first semester. Go me🥳. I also bought a new car. Whilst it may not be a big deal to everyone, I was able to buy the exact car that I wanted. May have cost a pretty penny but definitely worth it (she’s my baby).
What was majorly shocking for me was starting my own business. Being creative was never really my thing. Now however, the excitement of new fabrics arriving and creating new products is something I love so much. I cannot wait to see what’s in store next year as i continue to grow my business.
Overall, 2020 has had some not so great moments and 2021 not seeming to start off much better. I have learnt so many new things about myself and changed in ways I didn’t expect, my priorities, interests, taste in food? You name it. 2020 was a year of growth for me and that’s not something I can be frustrated at. Whilst I have no doubt there will be many obstacles ahead, I am so excited and ready for the challenges that lie ahead.
Ashleigh xo
changes, changes, changes
So it’s been a while. To say things have changed over the last few months is an understatement. Everything has happened, from wanting to leave my masters to starting my own small business (I didn’t give up on my degree dw). But the stuggle was real. My assignments felt ridiculously overwhelming. That and the constant changes in our societies really affected me more than I ever imagined they would. One day I’m at work as usual and the next I’m furloughed, I can’t barely keep up. My fam, friends and bf have been a great sounding board for me. Telling me to go with what I think is best but not to give up when times are hard. If it was easy everyone would do it. I guess the changes in work patterns lead me to start my own business.
Throughout lockdown, I saw so many past friends create their own business and really start to thrive. This made me wonder if they can do it why can’t I? So while I was in work, I asked friends what type of products they were interested in, as there obviously needs to be some kind of interest otherwise what’s the point? I came to the decision of making scrunchies. I don’t know about you but scrunchies are something I always love having. Being able to put your hair up and not get that ponytail headache or get a crease in your hair. It instantly became something I fell in love with. From someone who didn’t fair well creatively, I’m doing okay. Learning how to sew and use different fabrics was such an exciting experience for me. Selling my first product and first out of country product were major milestones for me. It helped me to realise that people actually do want to buy what I make and thats an amazing feeling.
Whilst so much has changed over the past 2/3 months, I’m so thankful for every worry and doubt I’ve had. After all they lead me to where I am today. I’m in a position I never thought I’d be in. I always had this pipe dream of having my own business. Although I’m not some big shot ceo of a corporate company like I imagined, I’m so grateful for the business I have. I can’t wait to see what the rest of 2020 and 2021 have in store for both my academics and small business 💞
(Just incase you wanna have a peak at my scrunchies😜)
Ashleigh xo
motivation, or lack thereof.
motivation. I don’t think I know what that word means anymore. I have no motivation. For uni that is. Online classes aren’t what I expected. The use of breakout rooms, throwing you into small groups with people from your course you may not know. Then just when you start to become comfortable with one another you’re dragged back into the main room with your mic and camera still on 😬. The mad dash to turn it off as quickly as possible is quite the adrenaline rush.
However this isn’t the main problem. The lack of concentration is. The constant bombardment of information in a short time frame makes it more difficult to pay attention compared to that of physical lectures. Another concentration blocker is distractions. Everything is a distraction. I don’t know about everyone else but I sit in my room for online lectures. Quite often on my bed. Not a good idea I know. The temptation to lie down and nap while the lecture runs on in the background is real. My course requires students to turn both their mics and cameras off until group sessions. This gives me ample opportunity to flick through the same four apps on my phone while the lecture plays in the background. Or babble in online shopping. Not good.
The majority of the time I hadn’t the faintest idea what was happening. So I decided to make both the best and worst decision. Going back to week 1 lectures to make notes. It was great in that I’d have notes to go over and ensure I know all the material covered. The big mistake was that I didnt pay any attention during the actual lecture that I didn’t even recognise the topics covered.
Whilst I realised I didn’t have a clue about half of my course it made me realise something. I really really need to concentrate. I think if I start focusing on the material and engaging with the lecture, I’ll become more motivated. Well I’m hoping so anyways.
Ashleigh xo
listen to yourself and watch your language. instead of saying “sorry for ranting”, say “thank you for listening to me”. instead of saying “sorry that i am overemotional”, say “thank you for trying to understand something difficult”. instead of saying “sorry if i am a burden”, say “thank you for the time and energy you invest in our friendship”. good things will come when you realize you are not an apology.
✨What to avoid when selling online ✨
When starting my masters I realised it was about time I sold my undergrad books. A friend reached out and stated that she made a fair bit of money so I thought why not. I posted the book listing one of my university society pages. Within minutes the message requests were flooding in. To say I was buzzing is an understatement. I stated the price and people were more than happy to buy. Although it was only when I went to post the items I realised the flaw in my plans. This is just one of the mistakes I didnt realise I’d made.
1. Calculate shipping price ahead of time.
I thought I was being smart and sensible by offering the buyers standard or tracked postage for a small charge. Little did I realise how expensive tracked postage for booked was. So when I charged buyers £5 for tracked postage I didn’t think it was going to cost me £16😮. So I opted for signed for postage instead which was still double the price I charged. Safe to say make sure you know how much it costs to send packages by weight before offering cheap postage.
2. Have the right packaging.
As I had never sold anything prior, I had no clue what I need to send a package. When I made my first sale, I trotted off to Tesco and bought all the packaging I saw. This as you can probably tell was not a smart move on my part. Different shaped and sized packaging made it into my basket and through the till. Only once I was home did I realise the items were to small or too big for the packaging I bought😕. Nevertheless I used it. No waste over here. However, now I do realise that I need to look at the items I’m selling and have a rough idea of what packaging will suit so that I’m not wasting money.
3. Be aware of fees.
This one has caught me out more than I’d like to admit. Between using PayPal and Depop sellers fees, make sure you know how much money you’ll actually receive for selling that item. As I’m sure many of you know, nothing is more heartbreaking than seeing the money enter your PayPal, then some leaving straight after for fees.
4. Don’t get your hopes up.
The amount of times I’ve got excited when someone has messaged me about a book or a dress is unreal. Every time I think okay this is going to be sold, I’m gonna make money 💰 etc etc. Then they say “nah it’s okay.” Your happy mood vanishes and you’re sitting wishing you didn’t get your hopes up in the first place. Treat every sale with caution, don’t assume that they are actually going to buy something until you’re sent payment. That’s the time to start doing your happy dance.
please dm before buying, open to offers 🌸 no responsibility after posting, no refunds or swaps
Ashleigh xo
How to remain productive with online classes:
A few tips from a broke neuro-divergent academic
Try and wake up early, and go to bed early too. I’m not saying get up at 5 (unless that’s you’re thing) but sleeping into noon is a productivity blackhole. I go for 8 or 8:30, generally, but that’s just what works for me.
Get dressed for the day. I’m not talking like, jeans and a business casual outfit, but a clean pair of sweatpants, fresh underwear, and a new shirt can really put you in the mood for a new morning.
Have a workspace. Whether it be the kitchen table, a desk, a spot on the floor with a lap desk, have a place that’s dedicated to your work. Have items that signify that workspace too, like your book, planner, laptop, lamp, whatever. It can help you get into the zone, being in that space.
Have a morning drink. I choose earl grey tea with honey and cream, but black coffee, herbal tea, lemon water, whatever works for you is awesome, as long as itll wake you up and start your day.
To do lists. To do lists and to do lists and more to do lists. I have three. One is a post it weekly planner deal (3.99 at a local grocery store). it’s a weekly spread already set up, and if you’re anything like me, its really hard to set up a weekly spread. Then I have an app called Ike. I have a daily to do list I write on that app, and then I have four more to-do lists of what I have to for each specific class.
Spread out your assignments. Don’t overwhelm yourself. If you’re professors are like mine, and have the due date for each module as Sunday at midnight. What I do is spread out all my assignments from Monday to Saturday, and I leave Sunday blank, so anything I didn’t do that week, I finish on Sunday. It works for me, it might work for you.
Have a folder for each class, and a notebook for each class. I hate spending money, I’m broke as hell, sono al verde as the Italians say, but a 0.99 cent folder and a 0.25 cent notebook can do wonders for motivating one to fill them up.
Study with a drink. Tea, water, coffee, whatever, but my go to is generally a warm drink. I cannot study if I’m cold, I get tired and groggy, so warm socks, a robe, and a hot drink really keep me going.
Take breaks. Make time for your hobbies, for something fun. Working without stopping absolutely destroys my motivation, and let me tell you, when I feel like that, an episode of Avatar and a snack gets me right back on the wagon.
Do self check ins. Does your back hurt? Are you sad? Stressed? Do you have to pee? Are you hungry? Never put your homework over your health. You won’t be able to get anything done well anyway if you’ve got those blocks.
Most importantly, get enough sleep. I beg of you. Sleep is so important, and it’s the game changer, at least to me. We as students have such an amazing opportunity to get more sleep than we ever have before during the year. Take advantage of that.
4. If the car pulls up to you run in the opposite direction.
5. Walk with your keys in your hands and keep a key between each finger
6. If they put you in the trunk kick out the headlights
7. If you get lost find a woman with a child. Never ask a man for help (this one was drilled)
That scream fire piece of advice is literally life saving
8. Watch your shadows and reflections, especially if someone is walking behind you. A split second notice is better than none and will help you.
Yes this last one really saves lives y'all I do it all the time
girls have to learn to view the world like international intelligence agents just to be safe walking down the street. smh.
guys pls pls pls reblog and girls pls pls pls be safe out there. terrifying and so sad that we have to worry about this on a daily basis
(I’m an enby, but, frankly, this is helpful for anyone.)
- always tell someone where youre at and an approx time when youll be back
Add text replacement words in your phone if possible. Something short and memorable that you can send quickly to people in moments of emergencies.
E.g.
I f ing hate that we need to reblog this, people suck, but this will save lives.
DO NOT SCROLL PAST
Being female fucking sucks but yes this shit is important for everyone
Also, do not walk close to walls. It will be easier for someone so walk past you and push you against it or corner you.
If your gut is telling you to cross the street or change your path, do it. Don’t risk it. Your body knows.
If you can, buy a large umbrella and walk holding it. Studies say that predators are less likely to attempt an attack on someone that could fight back. Keys around your knuckles is fine but you’ll need to get very close to do damage. Umbrellas are more precise.
Avoid wearing headphones if you are alone on an empty street. Look aware.
Again: Stay. Away. From. Walls.
Entering an uber alone? Call your father (or anyone you trust) and say “hey dad! Yep, I’m almost there, I’m sending you the route.” outloud. Then proceed to send them the route so they can follow the uber drive. This will most likely intimidate the predator.
If you see someone in an uncomfortable or possibly dangerous situation, walk up to them and say “Betty, oh my god, I haven’t seen you in so long!”. If she gets slightly confused, you can whisper and let her know you’re trying to help and that she should follow along. Walk together to another station or away from where you are. The man will most likely not follow. I have done this one 2 times and can be very helpful.
If you are unsure she needs help, you can pass her a note saying something like “hey, I noticed this man beside you is making you uncomfortable. If you’d like help, fake a sneeze right now and I will come up to you and pretend we are friends.” This is a long note, but its an example. Be discrete. If she follows along, proceed with the previous tip. This is helpful when you’re in a crowded train and you notice harassment.
Help your sisters. Trust them. Trust yourself. Be safe.
If you ever feel unsafe or need help, anyone is welcome to run upto me and ask me for help! I’ll go all mama bear and keep you safe!!!
https://docs.google.com/document/d/166g6Vo8Fb9H3FIZF2H6faEBHtFQSf7nVn_QxcJ9NMi0/edit?usp=sharing
I made this google doc covering 14 different self defense tips and tricks. it was made on January 15th, 2020 so it was before I decided I’d come back to tumblr jhjshdbjfh.
some amazing and potentially life saving tips, stay safe everyone ✌🏼
The unknowns of university during a pandemic
When I envisioned starting my master’s degree, i guess you could say that Covid-19 wasn’t part of the plan (I mean was it really part of anyone’s?). The normalcy of driving from Belfast to Coleraine to attend lectures was something I’d became accustomed to. This is despite having an occasional moan about the journey. Occasional being a term I’d use rather loosely here.
In hindsight, attending lectures in person was just one part of university life that i took for granted. Another would be the SU bar, but I’ll touch on that another time. It’s no doubt that the confusion and unfamiliarity’s regarding online learning are aspects of my postgrad that I didn’t anticipate. Will we use zoom, or will the content only be posted online? This is just one of the many questions that have been racing through my mind of the past few weeks.
With the current situation at hand, it’s challenging to prepare myself for the next academic year. Like many other students I don’t know what to expect. None of us do. Although, I am intrigued whether my motivation and productivity will improve while learning from home. Or could it drastically plummet to new depths? Either way it’ll be an interesting time to say the least.
