synopsis: You felt comfortable where you were. A well paying job and a group hangout scheduled every week(or at least you guys tried to). You were used to this routine and the occasional errand or two. You honestly preferred it that way, busy and packed. But somewhere along the line, you felt him ripping into the seams of your soul, pushing past the readily available facade and drinking your raw self from a glass straw.
Five times you shouldered something for someone, and the one time you ended up on his shoulder.
word count: 9.4k
yours (part two to yacttp)
synopsis: Seungcheol always considered himself to be yours. That had always been true and will be true. He considered himself to be a rather good friend, thank you very much and always had your back behind the scenes. If only the transition between friends and lovers were as easy. The trials and tribulations of Choi Seungcheol as he battled his own instincts while falling hard for his old friend were never going to be simple.
Five times Seungcheol wanted to have a meal with you, and the one time while eating, you didn't leave things as they were.
word count: 8.4k
⤷ propose (smau prequel to yacttp and yours)
synopsis: You, Seungcheol and the cocoon the two of you build around the world, and yourself. Being high school friends was easy, you just went to class, hung out here and there, maybe ignored what was unsaid a bit, and hung out some more. But when two shy hands held back, maybe words and simple tweets made the most sense.
⤷ cherry blossom ending (smau, pt2) ⤷ bonus
synopsis: You, seungcheol and the years sandwiched between friendship, love and companionship. His awkward actions, your awkward words and the unsaid differences seemed to be growing, alongside the tender feelings you mutually harboured.
who do u love?
synopsis: Choi Seungcheol lived quite well for an eighteen year old boy: He was growing well, had a good friend group, lived in a lavish house, and had the best grades in his class. This all kept him very happy, thank you very much. So why was it that his heart felt so heavy when you, his childhood friend, got closer to Choi Hansol, your neighbourhood’s star boy?
word count: 8.7k
er doctor!seungcheol x fem!underground boxer!reader
wen junhui:
90s crush!jun x friend!reader
kwon soonyoung:
frozen, summer
synopsis: 1999, a grueling summer, and you and soonyoung were as thick as thieves. It was a golden summer: days spent at the arcade, cramming in for your college entrance exams and golden hours at lunch. When did your youth end up slipping away?
Five moments between you and Soonyoung, and that one moment where you finally received everything you needed.
word count: 3.9k
jeon wonwoo:
wonwoo x gn!producer!reader
manager!wonwoo x idol leader!reader
kim mingyu:
midnight, the stars and you
synopsis:a chance encounter gives you newfound inspiration when you're stuck under a rainy night, feeling like absolute crap. Who knew this newfound inspiration knew you better than you thought?
word count: 2.9k
choi hansol:
who do u love?
synopsis: Choi Seungcheol lived quite well for an eighteen year old boy: He was growing well, had a good friend group, lived in a lavish house, and had the best grades in his class. This all kept him very happy, thank you very much. So why was it that his heart felt so heavy when you, his childhood friend, got closer to Choi Hansol, your neighbourhood’s star boy?
warnings: language and a very professional wonwoo. they r both awkward please give them a pat on the head
you guys were never really ready for the stardom that overcame your team. it all really started off with the you making the music and eventually being roped along into the team. you were a few months older than the rest of your crew, which the company had named MIDNITE, styled in all caps with a fancy font nobody cared for.
when your youngest member had caught fire online for disliking a specific flavour of milk that had gone viral, you had gone live and immediately shut that shit down, calling out people by their usernames if they so as much showed any hint of disrespect towards your fellow teammates.
"and you, applesforourleader, if you were a true fan, especially mine as you claim to be, you wouldn't be shit talking members all over some trash banana milk. "
you had gotten scolded by your company severely. wonwoo was there throughout it all, of course. as manager, he was supposed to look after your online presence, pr training, socials, schedules and healths. he listened to the earfuls you received, then the insults he had to swallow about his incompetency. you argued back when the CEO had mentioned replacing wonwoo with someone more hardworking and diligent. you wouldn’t stand for someone else being held responsible for your actions and opinions.
“that was fucking stupid. all over some stupid milk, i’m sorry I dragged you into this mess. hope you know that whatever they were saying was random bullshit,”
wonwoo stood tall before you, not meeting your eyes as he ran his hands though his hair, sighing frustratedly.
“don’t do that again, especially not for me,” wonwoo had said, rather seriously.
this wasn’t new. wonwoo preferred having a professional relationship, and pushed away any chance of you being friendly towards him. he wasn’t like this with the other members exactly. he would offer a smile once or twice and give them reliable and comforting advice. you weren’t upset, but curious about why he treated you so coldly. did you hurt him in any way?
you worked overtime to burn the anger off. with a new ep coming out, you had meeting with various peoples, accompanied by wonwoo. It was around 5pm when you had told him to go home. you then disappeared into your studio, working on a b-side.
it was around 2am when you left. you hadn’t expected much, and you felt the deep ache between your scapulas. your wrists were aching, and you had messages from your youngest member, begging you to buy ice cream on the way back to the dorms.
the things you do for love.
you walk out of the building, towards your car, only to find wonwoo on his phone, leaning against your car, blue light reflecting onto his glasses.
“wonwoo?”
he looked up. you could only hear the sound of the subway tracks and the sounds of birds tweeting too early and too late.
he wordlessly takes your car keys and takes his seat at the drivers without so much of a word.
“thanks, by the way.”
he looked forward, and mumbled nothing or something. he stopped at a convenience store, near the dorms a bit later into the calm drive.
you look at him, confused and surprised.
he looked a bit amused. “I’m also in the group chat, you know that?”
wonwoo looked younger when he smiled like that.
you followed him as he walked in. he grabbed chocolate for two of the members, then stopped to get mint for the youngest, then he stopped at a flavor you very much loved. it was surprising that he liked the same ice cream as you.
“I’m surprised you also like that flavor.” you prevented him from closing the freezer, trying to grab the same one he had just taken.
“don’t, this one is for you.”
it was silent as you looked at the ice creams in his hands, and watched him pay for them. you didn’t understand him at all, you had thought.
“I don’t understand you, wonwoo," you had grunted as you slammed the door as you huffed into the passenger seat.
it was silent. the car hadn't been turned on and wonwoo just sat in silence, fiddling with the buttons on his shirt, the ring around his thumb, and the emblem of the car.
“I’m sorry. but I can’t be close to people I work with. professionalism and ethics and power imbalances and what not.”
“why are you suddenly saying this?”
“I don’t just wanna be workers with you. I get so fucking frustrated around you because of how sweet you are to me, even when I’m being an asshole.”
“hold on,”
“let me finish, please, i prefer keeping my distances from people I like, makes things easier in the long run if I get hurt, but especially you. seeing you put your dream basically on the line for me today was too risky. please don't do that ever again. especially not for me.”
“so you like me?”
“is that all you got out of my confession? but in conclusion, yes.”
“but you don’t date coworkers?”
“not anymore. hearing that bullshit from the ceo pissed me off today. dropped off my transfer letter just after you told me to piss off, I'll be managing that new rookie group that debuts in a few months.”
he locked eyes with you, and asked if he could hold your hand. you had only nodded as he patted his hands on top of yours.
the two of you awkwardly avoided eye contact, looking forward as the bag of ice creams melted onto your laps.
It was a time where the grass was too vibrant, the days stretched on for hours at end and yet your class never seemed to be tired. The classroom rumbled with teenage hormones and bubbled with the rebellion of their loud youth. You just wished to get back home and continue reading your latest comic.
University was all everybody could talk about at this point of time. Graduation was only about six months away. Nobody would expect a new kid to join in halfway throughout the year.
Wen Junhui was the most prettiest boy you ever laid your eyes on. You would tell that to his face, if only he looked your way, that is.
Funnily enough, the two of you sat next to one another. You even gave him a tour of the school on his first day. He seemed thoroughly invested in your small town, and grasped on to your name well enough.
He offered to carry your lunch box on the way to the bus stop. He even helped you out with your math homework. He seemed to weasel his way into your life and group of friends, and fit in perfectly. You’d even glance him looking out the windows wistfully, his head stuck in his walkman, tapping his fingers on his lap.
He’d very much become a hot topic at your school, and you wouldn’t be surprised. He was good at sports, kind, charismatic, and hilarious! He even had aspirations for his future that he indulged himself onto you! Two months into your friendship with Wen Junhui, you confirmed your crush on him (secretly).
It wasn’t long before things deteriorated in your final teenage years.
You thought he had been looking at the window. You thought wrong.
You thought he had carried your lunchbox to the bus because he liked you. Wrong, again.
You had even thought you were close enough for him to open up about his future dreams and goals. This one, you were slightly right! but not for the reasons you thought for.
His eyes had always been clasped onto the class president, who had her eyes glued to the board, who sat by the windows, who took the same bus as you, and who had been eyeing the same university Jun had planned on applying to.
When you get invited to their wedding, few years into the future, you are genuinely happy at how this crush that seemed to all but consume you in your last months in high school seemed so trivial now.
But that part of you will always remember what it felt like to walk along Wen Junhui towards a sunset, his hands clasping onto your lunch box (and your heart).
pairing: journalist!mingyu x fem!movie director!reader
synopsis: a chance encounter gives you newfound inspiration when you're stuck under a rainy night, feeling like absolute crap. Who knew this newfound inspiration knew you better than you thought?
word count: 2.9k
notes, warnings: fem reader, she her pronouns used, slight won woo x reader. non idol au. Important, this is fictional and does not express reality about the actual members of seventeen. SANA AND DAHYUN MENTIONED YESSS. minghao cameo tehee
authors note: NOT ANGST... I was gonna go angsty route where mc tries finding mingyu across different places, only to end up meeting him at her movie premier. but as we know from 2521, journalist and athletes (director) in this case aren't meant to be </3 ended it a bit light heartedly though this time! apologies for grammar and other errors :,( English isn't my first language so if any metaphors and similes seem incomprehensible just base it off of a vibe pls ily
masterlist/navigation
The lights flashed harshly against your teeth. You smiled against the saturation, taking in the light without a flinch. The hand on your shoulder loosened. Nobody knew it, but you felt the lipstick smudge on the corner of your incisor. Your outfit felt rather constricting, but you almost preferred it this way. Your chest felt heavy. Heavy in the way where you felt your eyebrows melt into your eyes, Heavy in the way where the sweat sinking into your pores felt like acid. Would the media be satisfied?
If it was up to you, you’d skip the promotion of your movie all together. As the director, being able to see your sweet baby come to life was an insurmountable feeling. You couldn’t miss it for anything. But you’d been feeling rather blue as of lately.
Perfectly fitting for the title, in hindsight. It was rather funny. You titled your movie “Blue”, after multiple meetings with hard headed producers and hesitant editors. But you’d stuck to your choice, with an iron fist wrapped in cotton gauze, tenderly.
Looking around the sea of media, celebrities and journalists in front of you, it was funny that you couldn’t find anyone in blue. You eyed the simple white garment they had dressed Dahyun (your female lead) in. Her stylist had argued that the irony and contrast would make the periwinkle of the poster pop out even more. You had just nodded along, not taking much of anything in.
You had smiled proudly at Dahyun and Minghao from the side, watching on as they gave heartfelt interviews about their characters you had fleshed out the night of a storm.
From an outsider's perspective, your film didn’t have much substance. At least that was what you thought. It portrayed the story of a chance encounter between two strangers, stranded in a storm, finding warmth within one another and eventually blurring the lines between platonic friendship and yearning held together by two mutually broken people, styled out in a small, silent seaside town. Lots of garbage you had written when you were initially pitching the story. You had been told that there was nothing new and that your story had been done time and time again.
You had agreed with humiliation burning behind your forehead nodding at the words of executives you had to bow down to, of course, then on a whim, without thinking, added that making it a musical and marketing it as such would make it funny, despite the depressing and ambiguous ending. Something like Lalaland, but thoroughly different with characters that weren’t as charming, slightly more relatable, and characters that never seemed to be too hopeful. Why would the audience want to watch boring people? You rummaged your brain when you were first creating the character profiles. They were real, broken people in your brain. And that was enough for you. Hopefully, everybody else thought so too, because people like that existed. You would count yourself as an example, you thought while watching Minghao answer a question, explaining his character’s behavior throughout the film.
The two producers had looked at one another and thanked you for your ideas, mentioning an email or two before having an assistant usher you out of the board room.
Now you stood from the side lines, dawning a simple, loose fitting black suit, plunging yourself in the shadows as you watched your initial midnight rush make it to the big screen.
It was during the filming of one scene where you had finally decided on the name Blue.
It had suddenly turned windy near the river, you’d sighed in disappointment. The scene consisted of Dahyun and Minghao ending their first date and dancing along the banks in hope of their future possible partnership. But somehow, their moves weren’t exploding in a certain feeling that you needed. It felt a bit off and you weren’t able to explain why. Although the two of them were amazing dancers and actors individually, when they danced together, it felt a bit off. You couldn’t tell that to the two of them in public though, so you called a dinner break so the staff could eat under the tents shielding themselves from the rain, and so you could figure out how to combat this sudden awkwardness.
Maybe a walk to clear your mind would help. You pushed your phone in a random pocket and left without looking back. You had heard your assistant director, Jihoon, call after you, but you waved your hand to dismiss him, letting him cool off for an hour before shooting would resume.
You had just gotten off a call with your manager, her shaky remarks leaving you curious as well.
“-did mention you though! His interview was released just last night! And he even mentioned loving your debut and having this hunger to work with you. The comments were going crazy. I think they have a ship name for you guys, and you’ve been trending on Twitter for the past 15 hours.”
You were listening, but only enough to catch the keywords. He was an actor you that was more commercially known, working in franchises mostly, but his calm persona and deteriorating character arc in his debut made him a wonderful muse, you had thought.
Immediately, in your head, you had imagined him in a cyberpunk city, laughing his head off while slamming the pedals on his futuristic bike. Or, dressed in a light blouse, with a pensive stare as he pressed a rag onto his injured shoulder. Another, where he slammed his fist into the hero’s cheek. Or another where he cried his chest out at a park, sipping his orange soda between sobs. Jeon Wonwoo would be a delight to work with, you had decided. His face was perfectly moldable, and you were fantastic and pottery.
“You’d really make a cute pair though, he had literal heart eyes and a sweet smile while he was talking about midnight, the stars and you.”
“Sana, you know I don’t date. But him talking about MTSA is surprising to hear. Most people forgot about that one, especially seeing how terribly it did.”
“The budget was 10,000 won and a dream. Don’t blame yourself too much.”
“And your acting, which was honestly good for a rookie. Can’t believe you didn’t take up the offers that JYP gave you. Sorry you’re stuck with me.” You had chuckled. One hand in your pocket, and another pressing the block into your ear.
The wind was picking up and the upcoming rain was signaling you that you had to return before your clothes got drenched.
You quickly cut the call on Sana when the winding path became more foggy. The wind was picking up, yet the sound of the blurring rush passing across your eardrums seemed to help you meld into your thoughts.
What was it exactly that made the dance awkward?
The two were phenomenal and had this type of yearning chemistry that built to with every scene, slowly filling the pot of visual synergy until the dramatic climax where the pain between the two characters unfolded in a charming yet cynical duet.
The scene started with a shot of Minghao’s fingers dancing across the railing of the bridge where the two shared one can of beer, eventually crushing it with their stomps and dancing in a soft somber dance across the bridge before going their own ways. The lighting of the night was dreary, incredibly so, and the monotone outfits that your leads dawned did nothing to help.
Lost in your own thoughts, you didn’t notice the arrival of a stranger, leisurely handling an umbrella from his forearm, ignoring the rush of the cool evening wind.
You paid him no mind, focused on getting the dance movements right in your head. Apparently you looked quite upset, and perhaps your eyes watered from the wind, the frustration, the insatiable dissatisfaction, and the sudden realization of everyone’s hopes riding on your work.
Your face wasn’t even that crunched up, you would add, in a further recollection of this sudden memory.
This stranger would disagree.
Mingyu had planned on ignoring your presence. He knew who you were, knew that the shooting for your upcoming secretive film was happening just somewhere around, maybe asked for an autograph and some memorabilia. But at the moment, it seemed like you could use some human nuance and confront instead.
Mingyu fixed his thick rimmed glasses, and softly tapped the railing you were leaning on.
This was a pretty unfamiliar stranger. His eyes were wide and curious, not prodding, but rather a comforting nudge.
“May I help you?” You asked, your voice wavering.
Mingyu tilted his head, wondering how you could be asking about him when out of the two of you, clearly one was tearing up in the misty wind. Awkward, he cleared his throat and offered his handkerchief.
It was silk, and soft. Periwinkle in color. Embroidered with small blue flowers. You clasped it in your palm. Eventually, the silk fabric became darker. Drops of rain pattered down, and so did your tears. You fumbled, awkward. You just ruined a stranger’s offer for help, and were now causing him to get pattered in the rain in front of you.
You tried your best to get your hands off of the handkerchief, trying to hand it back to him, fingers shaking, trying to thank him under your breath.
You were in some sort of frenzy. This very charming, helpful and attractive man took a look at your crumbling exterior and tried his best to offer you a token of help (a piece of fabric). Mingyu looked at you, then at your shivering hands. Back into your eyes, cloudy in panic, then finally, Mingyu grabbed onto your wrists, warm against the cool raindrops, and ran away into the night.
Mingyu looked back at you every few seconds to see if you were following. To see if you were alright, and if you were alright with his palms against you. In this moment, you ran behind him, letting yourself be taken away, and your smile slowly erupted from the tough facade that had been constructed over the course of the night.
He led you to an awning, where your eyes seemed a bit clearer, and where a small laugh interrupted Mingyu’s quick mental checklist.
He was panting, and so were you by this point. Your laugh finally became more feasible and real. Mingyu was happy to see this, and he watched as you swiped at the tears and rain from the corner of your eyes.
His glasses were dotty, with rain drops littering his vision of you, forming a movie-like vignette around you as he looked at you, amazed.
Your laughter had drawn out at htis point, and what remained was the soft rain in the background. You looked up at him and blinked once, then some more before pointing at his glasses.
Mingyu was confused. What exactly were you staring at? He knew his smile looked too friendly sometimes, and he knew that the glasses framed his haircut well enough, but he couldnt help put stare down your fingers at your curious eyes.
He removed them with a quick swipe and offered them to you, where you cleaned his glasses with the same embroidered handkerchief he had offered not three minutes ago. He watched on, feeling slightly flushed.
Mingyu was used to taking care of people. He’d offer to make the ramen everyone would share on camping trips. He’d offer to drive on nights where everyone else was tired. He would cheer at his friends’ badminton matches, and he’d offer to wash dishes without being asked to.
This simple task of a celebrity treating him like he was slightly delicate and fragile made him feel like a glass cup waiting for its turn at polishing. New out of the box, but shy and proud nonetheless.
You wordlessly placed his glasses back on the bridge of his nose. You were shocking yourself with the amount of familiarity you were willing to give up to this stranger. He had kept you relatively dry on this stormy night, and offered his company without doing much.
A sudden revelation came to you, and you couldnt help but widen your eyes in pure whimsy as everything seemed to click in place.
Patting his shoulder, you left him in the night with a quick, “Thank you, Kind Stranger!”
You ducked back into the rain, unknowingly clutching onto the blue fabric tightly.
The soft, tender moment you shared with the beautiful stranger was enough to help you spin reality into fiction.
You looked at the pamphlet in your hand, showing movie stills and quotes from critics.
Scenes of Minghao laughing at Dahyun, Another where the two dance in the rain. The same rain you escaped into. Then another, with Dahyun cleaning the rain off of Minghao’s glasses, as he watched on bewildered. You hoped the cute stranger wouldn’t mind being used as inspiration.
The idea that had come to you wasn’t catastrophic or plot twisting of any sort. Just to lighten the mood of the entire evening and let your actors take the reigns, only telling them to end the scene on a light note. Eventually, you had asked the crew to start packing up. But you remained alongside the videographer, asking them to continue filming as Dahyun carried out the instruction you had whispered earlier.
Minghao’s bewildered face almost mirrored the stranger’s from an hour ago.
You flipped some more, reading some of the reviews you had received.
“Melancholic with a metallic taste of wine.” Lee Seokmin had said. You didn’t quite understand what he said, but the 9.2 stars underneath gave you some insight as to what he might have meant.
Your name was shouted acoss the carpet and you couldn’t help but fix the silk handkerchief in your left breast pocket before following the direction of the call.
Dahyun was smiling as she continued her conversation with the Journalist in front of her, his face hidden by the videographer gauging Minghao and Dahyun’’s converstation.
“Honestly, working with our lovely director over her was never a challenge. I’d say my character’s love for Myungho was enough to keep her going, until it just wasn’t. It's sad, very unfortunate, but I think that it is plausible, and it is real. That's what I felt when I read the script for the first time. That all of this is so very real. Myungho and Minji, were just not meant to be, despite the similarities they shared, the fact that in the end, they were still in love. But love is not always enough, as disturbing as it sounds.”
“Myungho was going through a lot. A new city, a new love, and with all these changes happening at once, he never gave himself the time to adapt or love his surroundings properly. On the surface, they seem developed enough, but the boss over here gave us very specific nuances behind the camera for character continuity. Like, did you know that my hands were always shaky in the morning scenes because Myungho had been drinking coffee at night to accompany Minji home after her night shifts? Even while art school was taking it out of him. Same with Dahyun, I remember being shocked when she just pointed at my glasses with the most obvious stare ever, and cleaned them for me. I didn’t even notice that my vision had gone blurry and dotted with the rain. That scene was very memorable for us to shoot. The boss even paid for our dinners, of course!”
“Speaking of Boss, here she is in person!”
Dahyun and Minghao looked expectantly at you. You felt yourself shrink a bit, into the collars of your coat, before the journalist turned to you with a gentle smile on his face.
His hair had grown now, and he’d replaced his glasses for what seemed to be contacts. He was also the only one in the whole event wearing anything resembling blue. A pale navy. He was the stranger that had inspired you to call your film blue.
Your eyes, lit in recognition and a shy smile glittered under your lips. It wasn't often you got shy, or that your inspiration had very much seen your work, and known that he had been taken as a bookmark into your mind.
“You're wearing blue,” You simply stated. Gently smiling, allowing your teeth to finally be visible enough.
He looked more in his own zone now, standing tall and straight, before fixing his name tag and tie.
“Yes! Of course, I was surprised to be the only one who went the conventional route,”
You had only looked at him, still in a bit of a doozy. Of course the hot stranger knew who you were. But he never said anything about it. It felt good to be treated like a stranger for once. The two of you started at once another as the converstaion came to a lull and Dahyun and Minghao followed down the carpet alongside the videographer for another journalist’s investigation.
“Off the record, Ma’am,” the stranger had asked. You fixed his handkerchief square once more, it becoming a ritual at some point.
You hummed in response, awaiting his question.
“Why name the movie blue?”
You looked down at his name tag, eyeing his gait, posture and the way he looked at you as if you hung the stars in the midnight sky. It was fun to watch as he shrunk under your gaze for once.
“You tell me, Kim Mingyu.”
end ˎˊ˗
an: thank you for reading! ngl this was rushed a bit but like I had the creative work flow so I had to get it written before I left it as a draft collecting dust. reblog and comments are very much appreciated. also I love reading your guys' comments, literally makes my whole day so if u guys have any thoughts or head cannons about this duo, comment ahead heheh
jihoon didn’t put much thought into this lead, but it was catchy enough to turn into a whole song. eventually, matching lyrics and flows were added.
seungcheol, mingyu, and vernon spent less than 40 minutes in the recording booth. they had complimented the beat while chatting with jihoon who had turned towards them, while you had focused on working on the equaliser, lost in your own world and your headphones cancelling out any convo behind you.
wonwoo took his time. not only was his verse not as good as it sounded in his head, it felt that every time he started with his lyrics, the only thoughts that lingered were the way your eyes were pressed onto the keyboard in front of you, perfecting something while missing the shy yet frustrated looks wonwoo shot at you, while jihoons sharp eyes guided wonwoo to their best ability.
wonwoo was getting frustrated, shedding layer after layer after each and every failed attempt at recording.
“hey, you’re okay.” you had finally looked at him, pressing onto the button that relayed your calm voice into his ears directly.
he gave you and jihoon and firm nod.
another trial, and yet nothing seemed to be working. the lyrics were jumbling into one another and nothing seemed to be making sense. it was as if he was just rapping for the sake of getting the song to three minutes.
“wonwoo. pretend you’re on a boat and that the waves are unpredictable. your voice works like the wind, above the waves.” your voice seemed sure and steady. strict even, if he prodded more into you.
suddenly, he’s on a yacht, sun nearing the horizon, and he sees you, fixing him a drink with a loving smile while he hears the rest of his friends in the background.
his voice starts producing a direction of its own, lyrics not following the scratched out paper in front of him, but earnest and steady nonetheless.
he looks up, sunny goosebumps under his sweating shirt, suddenly breathless.
jihoon gives him a thumbs up, while your eyes meet his to give him a proud smile.
wonwoo walks out of the recording booth, sea salt in his hair and a newfound weightlessness on his shoulders.
er doctor!seungcheol x fem!underground boxer!reader
warnings: stitches, needles, split lip, medical setting and jargon
seungcheol who’s been working night shift after night shift, drained out of his mind.
he’s at the last hour of his shift when you end up limping into the er (with a burly man in tow), you’re smiling with a bleeding nose, busted forehead and a split lip.
jeonghan, who walks up to you and settles you into a room. it’s a silent (but are they ever really?) shift today and seungcheol watches from afar as the man walks in after you, his face crunched and worried.
jeonghan, who then walks up to seungcheol, and after briefly explaining your situation, walks into the supply room to grab some suturing needles and a tray.
“underground boxer, won her 16th championship today, but has to catch a flight in four hours. the coach needs her healthy for her upcoming training regiment”
seungcheol walks into the examination room, and introduces himself, his voice wary, but curious at the state of you.
you’re mid stretch, slightly massaging your traps, before giving him a smirk in the politest way possible.
your coach wants to hover, because when can he not? at this point he’s become your uncle, doctor, manager, private chef and chauffeur, but he squeaks when seungcheol snaps on the blue latex gloves and loads the needle onto his holder and exits the room bravely.
you’re alone with this very cute doctor, who’s face is now hidden with a mask. his eyes are quite telling.
you feel him hold his breath as he presses into the first stitch. you wince, but still smile as he looks down into your face.
“don’t worry, you should’ve seen the state of the others,” you let out, with a slight huff as the sting on your forehead dulls. seungcheol pauses, and looks at you as you try to reassure him in his own workplace. cute.
“don’t worry, i trust you. barely any bruising, and your knuckles seem to be in good condition” he softly lets out.
before he leaves the room, he offers you some sweet advice, giving you a once over.
“take some rest before you win your 17th”
your smirk is replaced by something slightly more heartwarming.
months later (yes, you took his words into consideration), when you finally enter the ring to determine your fate, you think you imagine seeing a very familiar doctor working on the sidelines, patching up your previous opponent.
when you receive your medal, you give the doctor in casual clothing a quick glance over, his own eyes crinkling as he nods at you from a polite distance. the crowd cheering you on is silent when you gleefully give him a toothy smile back.
you walk him home that night, showing him your medal along the way, the night sky spectating the start of something delicate.
-
navigation
watched TOO many Jack abbot edits guys… here’s a small Drabble I wrote up.
I love love yacttp and yours and cherry blossom, I love love reading both parts, I love Cheol's confession, but I cried a lot with oc's confession!!! It was so honest, she put everything she felt on it!!
It was beautiful !!
hello lovely nugget13!! thank you so much for your love and tuning in to this short series I wrote. seeing your love likes and reblogs really means so much to me <3 thank you for supporting writers and I really appreciate it. I’m glad you enjoyed the confessions, esp MCs and I hope you didn’t end up crying too much HEHEH ^^ THABK YOU FOR THR LOVE I APPRECIATE YOU SO MUCH OH MY GOSHHHH 😭😘😭😘🩷🩷🩷🥹🥹🥹🥹 have a lovely day/night ahead, and take care!
AHHHH THEY GOT MARRIED/ENGAGED!! 🎉 as they should 🙂↕️ loved you bonus content so much! And the end with Wonwoo was so funny 😂 thank you so much for writing that whole series I truly loved it so much! Hope you’re doing well! 🫶💕💕
HELLO MY LOVELY ANON!! 🩷🩷🩷
they did!! I think they didn’t realize but they were dating each other without knowing at all :3 but yes they do get engaged HEHEH!!! wonwoo 💔💔 oh wonwoo!! If only Cheol had said yes to lunch maybe he wouldn’t have forgotten his files, but that would mean no Cheol and Mc interactions hehe 🩷🩷
thank you for spending your time reading my work, I really appreciate it very much ~ thank you so much my lovely anon, I hope you’re having an amazing day/night 🩷🩷
synopsis: You, seungcheol and the years sandwiched between friendship, love and companionship. His awkward actions, your awkward words and the unsaid differences seemed to be growing, alongside the tender feelings you mutually harboured.
warnings, notes: she/her pronouns, fem, unnamed reader! this is part 2 to a prequel smau to yacttp and yours. you don’t have to read them, but they’ll help make sense I think! pictures were taken from Pinterest :3 these images don’t represent mc, you can imagine her as however you’d like! This is a work of Fiction and does not represent seventeen. there are a lot of pics with food, and occasionally alcohol.
authors note: FINALLY DONE WITH THE WHOLE SERIES. if u have any asks about this couple, let me know ill like give my head cannons that I have :3 :D this was inspired by cherry blossom ending by busker busker. .
⇜ PREVIOUS | CURRENT | NEXT ⇝
masterlist/navigation
end ˎˊ˗
an: POOR WONWOO thank you for reading once again! reblog and comments are very much appeciated.
synopsis: You, seungcheol and the years sandwiched between friendship, love and companionship. His awkward actions, your awkward words and the unsaid differences seemed to be growing, alongside the tender feelings you mutually harboured.
warnings, notes: she/her pronouns, fem, unnamed reader! this is part 2 to a prequel smau to yacttp and yours. you don’t have to read them, but they’ll help make sense I think! pictures were taken from Pinterest :3 these images don’t represent mc, you can imagine her as however you’d like! This is a work of Fiction and does not represent seventeen. there are a lot of pics with food, and occasionally alcohol.
authors note: FINALLY DONE WITH THE WHOLE SERIES. if u have any asks about this couple, let me know ill like give my head cannons that I have :3 :D this was inspired by cherry blossom ending by busker busker. .
⇜ PREVIOUS | CURRENT | NEXT ⇝
masterlist/navigation
end ˎˊ˗
an: thank you for reading. I could only add 30 pics so theres a bonus as well HEHEH... I worked hard on the dates so that theres a chronological order and feel. they're unrealistic of course, but I think its still ok :3 thank you for everything <3 . thank you for reading once again! reblog and comments are very much appreciated.
Hiiii just wanted to say that yacttp and yours were super cute! I really enjoyed seeing both sides of the story and if you do ever make the a smau I’d be totally down to read it but no pressure of course! Thank you so much for writing and hope you’re doing well! 💕🫶💕🫶
omg js got my first anon HELLO MY DEAR FRIEND 💕
thank you for staying til the end for seungcheol and mc's story <3 its support like yours that kept me going heheheh :3
idk if theres a set date for the smau, but ill try getting it out :DDDD
I'm doing well, and I hope you're doing amazing. Have a lovely morning/afternoon/evening
synopsis: You, Seungcheol and the cocoon the two of you build around the world, and yourself. Being high school friends was easy, you just went to class, hung out here and there, maybe ignored what was unsaid a bit, and hung out some more. But when two shy hands held back, maybe words and simple tweets made the most sense.
warnings, notes: she/her pronouns, fem, unnamed reader! this is a prequel smau to yacttp and yours. you don’t have to read them, but they’ll help make sense I think! pictures were taken from Pinterest, and one curse word used :3 these images don’t represent mc, you can imagine her as however you’d like! This is a work of Fiction and does not represent seventeen.
authors note: apologies for the long break. it’s been a tough month. But enough about that :D this was inspired by propose by sunwoojunga.
⇜ PREVIOUS | CURRENT | NEXT ⇝
masterlist/navigation
sports fest, senior year, 18
graduation, 18, again
university chronicles, 19
-
a/n: this is probably only going to have two parts heheh. ages are unrealistic here and I wanted to show the change in their mindsets with their texting styles, pfps hehehehh… ANYWAYS!!! Reblogs and comments would mean very much :3
synopsis: 1999, a grueling summer, and you and soonyoung were as thick as thieves. It was a golden summer: days spent at the arcade, cramming in for your college entrance exams and golden hours at lunch. When did your youth end up slipping away?
Five moments between you and Soonyoung, and that one moment where you finally received everything you needed.
word count: 3.9k
notes, warnings: fem reader who uses she her pronouns, high school friends, non idol au, fears of growing up, reader is anxious, Hoshi has a bit of a bad reputation. ANGST. ANGST. 5+1 trope, unresolved tension. Important, this is fictional and does not express reality about the actual members of seventeen. will they won't they type of friendship. platonic Jihoon.
authors note: this is slightly based off of love letter (1995). this is a rather short one but I felt this wrenching in my heart that I had to express somehow. hope u guys enjoy, and I would suggest listening to frozen summer from the love letter ost by remedios. thank you for supporting me and more from me later.
masterlist/navigation
Present day, July 30th
Hot wafts of wind blew into your three-bedroom apartment. Seoul was hot enough, and you chose to stay indoors, especially with the way the mosquitoes seemed to swarm around entrances and windows if left unnoticed. It gave you shivers just thinking about it!
Your mother had mentioned that she was sending you a few boxes from your days at school, mementos she had kept for the sake of remembering days of your sunny youth. But, with the move she was planning to make to the countryside, maybe it was best for you to finally open Pandora's box and relive what it was like to be 18, graduating high school, and dipping your feet into the real world of grown-ups you were now, so well accustomed to.
June 4th, 1999, Friday
You, Soonyoung, and Jihoon were walking back to your respective homes. School was finally over for the day. It was a late night with the sounds of cars honking over your silent conversations.
Jihoon was the one who was mainly speaking, talking about how the Physics teacher, Mr. Lee, was being way too harsh, enforcing study hours earlier than other classes, and somehow still leaving at the same time as everyone else.
You and Soonyoung were listening silently, feeling a bit awkward with one another, with Jihoon sandwiched between the two of you, which was uncommon.
The two of you were caught sending notes to one another, and had to deal with the ‘oohs and ahhs’ of your stupid classmates, as your teacher scolded you on about the failures that the two of you would end up becoming if you two stuck to one another so closely.
When you had planned to retort, you had felt Soonyoung's sheepish hands on yours, only further strengthening the teasing of your classmates. You couldn't look him in the eyes for a good two hours.
The relationship between the two of you was loving and delicate. Soonyoung cared for you, as did you for him. You would defend him if it meant hearing the curses of your teachers and anyone in the way, but Soonyoung wouldn't let you. He wouldn't want you to do that, especially not for someone like him. You would disagree.
You shook your head as the memories of the day came back to you.
"I have to go buy some groceries on the way back. I'll see you guys tomorrow, though." Jihoon waved at the two of you, not even bothering to look back at you.
When it was just the two of you left, what remained was silence. It was rare, with you and Soonyoung usually coming up to no good, but left without vices and excuses to lean on, what lay was a foundation of honesty that was always hidden.
"Soonyoung, My Hoshi," You had started off, not looking into his eyes as the two of you wandered down the street. The night made it easier to ignore his gaze.
"You're not going to be a failure. I know it for sure. You're going to kick these exams in their asses, and old man Lee won't know what's gonna hit him." You stopped, finally meeting his gaze.
He looked at you, finally coming to his senses.
“You still up for the arcade?”
-
After a 10,000 Won note was well spent, the two of you were back in your regular rhythm. Competitive, teasing, and upbeat. This was what you preferred.
“Hosha, pass me the raspberry,” you had told him, without taking your eyes off the screen, which played overwhelming music and obnoxious sounds of shooting and victory voice notes.
He had passed you his raspberry-ade without much thought, you’d taken a sip, complained, and proceeded to take another sip. Both of your tongues had been dyed a bright, toxic blue by the end of the night. Typical for Class 3’s tedious twos. That was what your English Teacher had come up with three years ago, when Soonyoung had first started talking to you. Back when you were still just another student in his eyes, until, of course, you weren’t.
The two of you were mashing the buttons of the Tekken 3 machine. The owner’s son watched the clock, waiting for when he could kick you guys out.
As the minute hand stepped closer to 10PM, Jeonghan would be free to drop back home and relish in kicking the two annoying high schoolers out of his shop. He couldn’t wait for mischief to arrive.
“Alright, pack it up, idiots,” He clapped his hands incredibly close to your ears. You didn’t flinch, used to his annoying presence.
“Oi, I need her for backup, don’t annoy us, uncle!” Soonyoung came to your defense. You enjoyed it, somehow.
Jeonghan backed up, guffawed at the occurrence of being renamed an uncle, and flicked the lights in one go.
The sound of the arcade machine dying caused you and Soonyoung to deflate in real time. With the clock striking closer to curfew, you couldn't help but flip Jeonghan the finger. He couldn't help but laugh at your profession of anger in return.
You carried your school bag on hunched shoulders, while Soonyoung finished the last of his drink, pausing when the brain freeze finally ended up phasing past him. When the arcade shutters were placed, you and Soonyoung couldn't help but give each other a glance as the lone gacha vending machines lay outside, unguarded.
If any passerby were to be interviewed, they would've mentioned seeing two arguing idiots squatting on the floor, fighting for the cuter keychain. Soonyoung, of course, ended up relenting, and you became the owner of a very special edition star keychain.
Looking back, it was stupid: all of it.
The star keychain felt smaller in your hand now, yet the banter and late nights made up for it.
June 15th, 1999, Tuesday
Birthdays were usually a quaint affair for your friend group. Unfortunately, the two of you were studying for a big exam. Soonyoung had sat next to you for all three years of high school, something that had shocked you on the first day when he had walked in and slammed his bag next to yours. Initially, you were scared. Was he a gangster? With his unnerving walk, he seemed a bit off.
You assumed he'd change seats next period after the teacher left. It made sense when you thought about it. He'd taken the only free seat at the back.
You were shocked when he remained your trustworthy seat-mate, even after years of changing classrooms and teachers, and ages.
"This is another way we can write non-real numbers, using Euler's number. Don't forget it. Also, focus on trigonometry. I heard they asked it a lot in Jeonghan's paper, last year," you explained. You tried your best to remain as quiet as you could, not wanting to distract anyone during self-study.
"Jeonghan? When did you talk with him?"
"Hoshi! Not relevant, and let's focus on maths, okay?" You tapped his forehead as he rubbed on, pouting as he grabbed the pen that was lying nearest him.
"Don't hit me on my birthday,"
"Sorry, Birthday boy." You couldn't help but give him a silly face as you watched him work on a few problems. Guess he was listening. He had no problem rushing through the questions.
Your stomach was rumbling. Your stomach was grumbling rather loudly. Perhaps it was the combined hunger and anxiety, but this had become your new normal, unfortunately. You had told Jihoon to keep Soonyoung's cake at his house, being closer, but you didn't know how much longer you could wait for dinner.
Soonyoung poked your shoulder, and you couldn't help but glare back, unintentionally. You immediately apologised and rubbed his shoulder. Thankfully, there were only about thirty minutes left until the self-study session was over.
You looked at Soonyoung lovingly. Your friend whom you'd always relied on. He was your rock, but also your feather, if that made sense. He was there for you when you fell during PE, but was also there to cheer you on when you would supply stupid ideas that would get you pelted on by other friends. It all worked out in the end. Now, you and Soonyoung were off to university together, too!
You patted his shoulders when the bell finally rang. It was time to get out of this place, stinking with teenage fumes.
-
You stared on as the two unfamiliar strangers were sitting across from you and Soonyoung, singing off-tune to a very lacklustre happy birthday melody (or what it was supposed to be).
You helped set up the cake with Jihoon, leaving Soonyoung to be left with the two unfamiliar batch mates. You couldn't help but hurry and stuffed the ribbon wrapping the birthday cake box into your pockets, snagging the corners and presenting the cake to a waiting Soonyoung. Jihoon followed with the candles.
"So, Wonho, how is the preparation for English going?" Soonyoung had mentioned, with cake eventually running down his cheeks.
"Uh, it's Wonwoo, and I'd say it's going good. It could be better," the spectacle-wearing guy had answered.
Soonyoung shifted in his seat, clearly embarrassed for not knowing his batch mates, despite being the self-proclaimed popular guy of the 1999 batch. No issue, he would just talk to the other guy instead.
"What about you, Junho? How's Chemistry?"
"I'm having a hard time remembering the reagents. But I'm enjoying it anyway. Oh, it's Junhui, by the way," The other guy corrected, kindly. You couldn't take your eyes off the way Soonyoung seemed to melt further into the cushion of Jihoon's living room. He was adorable, now that you looked closely.
The conversation flowed into the room, eventually, thanks to your help. You tried to flow the conversation between the other four, who were awkward teenage boys who seemed to be meeting for the first time. Even Soonyoung was rather quiet. It was rare, especially when you considered the fact that it was his birthday and he never really got shy around strangers. He even talked back to Jeonghan when you guys first landed at the arcade three years earlier.
Jihoon had finally mentioned that his mom had offered cake to their next-door neighbours, leading to Wonwoo entering your party of three, and inviting his friend Junhui along. It wasn't that bad with them, in hindsight. Wonwoo ate in silence, while Junhui nodded along to everything you and Jihoon said. It was a mundane conversation, yet the excitement of Soonyoung's birthday eventually got to all of you. You left Jihoon's at almost eleven at night. Soonyoung offered to walk you home. Bright, rose-like ribbon was spilling out of your pants pocket. You couldn't help but push it further into your pocket as Soonyoung talked about his worries for the future. He would be okay, you thought.
Looking at the frayed ribbon now, you wonder why you held on to it, so many years later. You remembered the bright flash of crimson that wrapped the box, but all that remained was an aged, frayed, and dirty ribbon.
June 27th, 1999, Sunday
You'd find Junhui crying after one of his exams. You didn't know what to say, but you patted his shoulders and let him cry for a good two minutes while looking out the window, giving him some sort of pseudo-privacy. He'd given you a smile down the hallways a few days later. Soonyoung looked on disapprovingly. You brushed the boy off.
You and Soonyoung finally finished a few of the more challenging examinations. You'd get a week off before the exams begin again. The pressure of everything was hitting you hard. You'd be stepping into a new world. New people, new environment, A whole new city. This would be something you'd put off for years, but it was getting closer to graduation every day you woke up. Would it be possible to stop time and enjoy the summery days before adulting became real? You didn't want to leave the comfort of your childhood, the comfort of having your closest friends by your side, the taste of your mom's food, the treats your dad would bring back after a long day of work. It was becoming realer by the second, and you couldn't help but be blue as every day grew closer to graduation. Your world might as well just end.
Soonyoung shook your shoulder gently. You turned to look at him, but looked away almost immediately. He held a small flashlight between his teeth, trying to find a pen you had dropped in the PE field. The grass was growing, untended, as the summer days grew closer and the holidays were inching further towards you. He had grunted back then, his way of asking where you went for a second. If only Soonyoung knew half of your worries. You didn't wanna grow up, not ever.
Soonyoung offered something in his palm. You grew excited, finally finding your precious pen, but only finding a small leaf in the small of his palm. You grabbed it from him, finding a small four-leaf clover. He smiled at you, his face scrunching up, and the warm wind placed apples of roses on his cheeks. You couldn't help but grab and squish his cheeks in appreciation. What a thoughtful boy, you had thought back then.
You didn't end up finding the pen, unfortunately, which left you further in the trenches. Soonyoung had given it to you as an olive branch of friendship on your second week as seatmates, and you'd been buying refills of said pen for a good while.
"Hey, I can always buy you another one. Plus, that pen was on its last run; it's better this way anyway," Soonyoung suggested, lollipop in his cheek.
He didn't understand. This was another thing that was changing and was out of your control. You felt a bit frantic. Seven exams had finished. You had four more to go. Four more until everything would change.
The clover was now barely green. You'd remember pressing it flat against a textbook once you'd reached home. You never remember it being still in one piece after so many years apart.
July 13th, 1999, Tuesday
Jihoon couldn't believe that all his exams were over. All of these exams he'd been studying for were finally over. He was in some sort of daze, feeling a bit under the weather. He pushed his rice around in his bowl, letting his sighs become more and more evident as the afternoon passed on.
You nudged Soonyoung, gesturing for him to look at Jihoon. The two of you shared a concerned look. Your own plate was rather empty, but Soonyoung was still scarfing his meal down. You tried to bring up conversation, but Jihoon would only hum or nod in response. Soonyoung was growing rather restless, too.
You couldn't believe how fast things were going downhill. Could you stay cocooned at this lunch table where you'd heard chatter from friends and foes alike, the sound of cutlery being carelessly thrown around, and the sound of high pitched laughters from all four corners? It was impossible, but you looked on at Jihoon, who was now beginning to mirror the storm in your head. The worries of University, work, love, and the future were going to weaken you at the knees. It hurt even more, seeing your friend Jihoon going through something similar.
Soonyoung watched your face drop as you took in Jihoon's mannerisms. It seemed that the two of you were in deep worry. Usually, you and Soonyoung would come up with something to make Jihoon snap out of it or offer some deep advice. But it didn't work the same way when half of the gag duo was in the same boat as Jihoon.
Although Soonyoung's face didn't express it, he was going through painful turmoil inside his skin. But how could he express it through words when the two of you lay in front of him, faces all sullen?
Soonyoung pulled out strips of coloured paper and folded them in on themselves, forming three pentagons before tucking the ends of the paper into a small crevice. He pinched with his nails (that you had painted clear the night before), gently on each of the vertices. Soonyoung did this mindlessly, not thinking much. He couldn't let the building migraine take away from what he was attempting to do. When the three mini stars had been made, he placed them on his sweaty palm, offering it between the three of you.
Jihoon looked on, distracted, but he let out a soft smile that seemed to take away the age of his crinkled eyebrows. He picked the soft pink star.
You watched lovingly, admiring Soonyoung. He was a good listener and friend, despite what the teachers had warned you against. How could you hate such a thoughtful friend, who knew how to brighten your days without a thought?
You picked the tiny, bright blue star from his palm and carefully pocketed it into your breast pocket, safe and sound.
Later, when the two of you were walking home at three in the afternoon, your palm brushed against Soonyoung's. He didn't pull his hand away when you clasped onto his thumb.
The pinched points of the star were now squashed flat, almost returning to the folded pentagon it once was. No matter how much you tried to pinch it back, it wouldn't budge.
July 30th, 1999, Friday
Graduation. When you first walked into the tall walls of your high school, it seemed as if the day would never come. Your parents smiled on proudly as you dressed in your finest and brought their cameras along to document every moment. They had even saved up for one of those famous Polaroid cameras you had wanted as a birthday gift two years earlier.
Jihoon smiled as he received flowers from a girl he didn't quite know, and you and Soonyoung stuck to one another. He'd held on to your camera, the strap pressed close to his chest while you fixed his hair that was tucked under the graduation cap.
Watching him felt like a victory. It was a slap across the face to all the judgmental teachers who had judged Soonyoung based on baseless rumours when he had first transferred into your high school years prior. Soonyoung had a glint in his eyes as you watched the Teachers relaying their final wishes to your graduating batch. It was heartwarming, especially for the teachers who had been nothing but nice to you and Soonyoung.
When it was all over, Jihoon had walked over to the entrance of your class, one final time, where you and Soonyoung were carving your initials on your desks at the back of the classroom. A way of leaving your mark on this little corner of the world you had grown up in. You used a compass while Soonyoung waited on you, patiently.
Your tables were now engraved in an amalgamation of disfigured initials. Yours, neatly placed alongside a messy scrawl of "+ K.S.Y".
Jihoon watched on with a smirk, his own graduation cap slipping off. Your classroom was now empty, with the sun sinking further into the horizon. You watched as Jihoon turned a chair towards your desk one last time, and Soonyoung gave Jihoon one last head pat before everything became real.
You had laughed, your book bag heavy with departing gifts.
"Hey, let's take a photo, just us," Soonyoung begged.
"Hosh, you have the camera. You really don't have to pout," You had laughed.
Jihoon took the camera from Soonyoung's outstretched hands and asked the two of you to pose.
You smiled, meekly, suddenly aware of the proximity between you and Soonyoung. This was the seat where the two of you reigned at the back of the classroom. Where the two of you tossed stupid notes despite having the ability to whisper. Where you had tutored him thirty minutes before the maths midterm. Where you had expressed your fears of failure.
But this was now where you were, smiling, with the sun rays falling on your cheeks as you posed alongside your friend, suddenly shy.
Jihoon snapped, and the photo developed.
"Hey! One more for me to take home!"
Jihoon rolled his eyes, muttering something about the price of film.
You pressed your head against his shoulder, feeling tired and slightly nostalgic for the moment you were currently in.
"Yah! another one!"
In this one, Soonyoung pressed a wet peck against your smiling cheek. You didn't know how to react when he pulled away, and only nodded on as he pocketed the two pictures.
Jihoon watched on, amused, but he didn't say anything. He knew the two of you would cross the bridge eventually.
At the end of the day, when you walked home with Soonyoung, he had pressed a book into your hand. It was an English book that you never really got to finishing. The cover was hardback, so you knew it was going to be crazy expensive. When Soonyoung handed it to you before heading home, you had smacked his bicep in appreciation. He held on to your shoulders for a second, remembering your face and etching it into his eyelids. You understood this feeling of longing, somehow.
"Yah! See you over the summer!" You called out as he walked away.
"Definitely!" His voice cracked as he replied.
When Soonyoung turned around the corner of your street, you waited for him to turn back. He hadn't.
That was the last time you ever saw Soonyoung.
Present day, July 30th
You hadn't thought of Soonyoung in a long, long time. It was too painful to think about him and the days you spent together without a thought. When he first disappeared, you had asked around his neighbourhood, only finding out he had moved right after graduation. He left no trace, no clue, nothing. Jihoon had held your sobbing figure on your first birthday after his disappearance, muttering words of courage while his own tears slipped away.
Your days at the university were promised with Soonyoung, but he'd betrayed you terribly. If you were to see him again, you'd never forgive him. Oh, but you would, that too, with open arms.
Years later, when you had married Jun, you had felt his lack of presence the hardest. You had mailed an invitation to his old address, only to receive it weeks later, rejected by the mail office. That was when it had finally hit you, your best friend and first love was officially missing.
Your hands shook as you opened the book slowly, its spine cracking after years of neglect.
A picture, long forgotten, had slipped out.
It was a picture from graduation, with Soonyoung pecking your cheek affectionately. You were so young, and he looked so content. Sometimes you wondered if he was happy out there somewhere, and you once hoped he remembered you. You had almost forgotten what he'd looked like. But with the passing of time and your own maturing, you left it as an unfinished chapter in your life.
The polaroid was as it was the day Jihoon took it, pristine, untouched, and frozen in that forsaken summer.
You had flipped it, ready to place it back within the book it had been encased in.
In his messy scrawl, he left words that flickered a sudden freezing warmth at the pit of your chest.
I love you, always.
from soonyoung.
end ˎˊ˗
an: thank you for reading. this one hurt to write. also, I don't think there will be a part two to this. this is where soonyoung and mc's story ends <3 . I would like to add that mc got with jun after getting over soonyoung. thank you for reading once again! reblog and comments are very much appreciated.
pairing: cbf!seungcheol x fem!reader x chess player!hansol
synopsis: Choi Seungcheol lived quite well for an eighteen year old boy: He was growing well, had a good friend group, lived in a lavish house, and had the best grades in his class. This all kept him very happy, thank you very much. So why was it that his heart felt so heavy when you, his childhood friend, got closer to Choi Hansol, your neighbourhood’s star boy?
word count: 8.7k
notes, warnings: fem reader, she her pronouns used, they call eo idiot (affectionate) UNREQUITED LOVE(?) ANGST. fake confession but it makes sense I think. a lot of these scenes are from reply 1988. members are referred by their Korean names. reader has an older sister and brother (unnamed), financial issues. slight jisoo x reader. non idol au. Important, this is fictional and does not express reality about the actual members of seventeen
authors note: hello guys. I know I uploaded like three stories but like hear me out... this is an old one that I repurposed for svt... I posted this on my prev reading account. you can even see the robotic way I used to write im sorry guys... ANYWAYS hope u enjoy muah. once again, English isn't my first language so apologies in advance for running sentences and grammatical errors. also, based on who do you love by the black skirts.
masterlist/navigation
-
December 1988, Seoul, Seungcheol.
Seungcheol Choi’s street was a small one. His family lived in a lavish bungalow. His four other childhood friends were all clumped around the one street that held them all together.
Below his bungalow, closest to his heart, lived a friend he’d known since birth. It was your family. Your family wasn’t in a good financial state, and he’d heard stories from his mom about how scraping your monthly rent was getting harder and harder. It wasn't much, but the half-basement house that you and your family resided in was always welcoming. The floors were often cold, but your family had warm hearts.
Adjacent to his house was the Yoon Family’s bungalow. They were well off, and about three years ago, Seungcheol, his brother, and his parents rented a small warehouse in the patio of the Yoon Residence. Seungcheol wasn't able to visit often, but whenever he did, Jeonghan was lounging around without a care in the world. His parents were often at work, so Jeonghan often tagged along with whoever was nearby, often eating meals together or watching the latest movies together in Hansol’s room.
Across his house to the left was Jisoo Hong’s house. Good ol’ reliable Jisoo. Class president Jisoo. The honourable Son Jisoo, the perfect Brother Jisoo. Jisoo and Seungcheol went way back. Jisoo lived in a small, quaint house with his mother and his baby sister.
Next to Jisoo’s house was the house of the neighbourhood's star boy. The star boy wasn’t even home most of the time, but his room was where the heart of the street resided. The house lay free for the first five years of Seungcheol’s life until a father-son duo made the corner bungalow theirs. Choi Hansol and his father moved into the street fifteen years ago. Their arrival was the final one, and thus, the four musketeers closed up and became five.
Seungcheol grew up poor. He lived a life with his parents, carefully rationing off their meals so he and his brother could have their fill. Life wasn’t fair to him. It wasn't really fair to anyone who lived on his street. His house was on a small street on the outskirts of Seoul, shying away from the developing city, but close enough to the city for him not to be considered a country bumpkin.
His family used to be the poorest on their block. Now, his family was the richest. Winning a lottery on a random Tuesday afternoon does that to you.
In the comfort of his room, he was enjoying a comic that was recently released, with earphones that played some of the hits of 1988: Violet Fragrance, to You, and After The Play Is Over.
“Seungcheol!” His mom called from the kitchen. Seungcheol threw his comic on his bed and ran to the kitchen, where his mom was towering above him, holding a large tray filled with an assortment of rice cakes.
“Go give some to your friends. Be back before dinner,” his mom gently said, before walking back to the kitchen, checking over the pot that held a bubbling stew.
-
Seungcheol trudged down the stairs of his house. Then he walked down some more stairs in the gruelling winter down to the half-basement where your family resided. Seungcheol fixed his collar slightly, cleared his throat, and knocked gently against the metal door before walking in with the tray in tow.
To his surprise, he wasn't the only outsider in the house. He saw you conversing with Jisoo, who was eyeing your house, as if trying to turn it upside down. You, on the other hand, were in your own world, talking and eyeing him as if he were the only person in the whole room.
As soon as the metal door scraped the concrete floor, both your and Jisoo’s eyes snapped towards Seungcheol’s. Jisoo let out a gentle smile, greeting his friend and bidding him goodbye as he grabbed the small trinket that was in your hand before leaving with a small sigh that went unnoticed by you, but not by Seungcheol. He’ll ask Jisoo what happened later in Hansol’s room.
You grumbled at Seungcheol, playfully annoyed at his presence. This type of banter and faux anger was common between you and Seungcheol. It was your dynamic. You would say something far too optimistic or dense, and Seungcheol would bluntly pull you out of la la land with a harsh comment or two, and you would reply back with another just quip until Jisoo or Jeonghan pulled you two out of your mental arenas.
“What are you here for, Seungcheol?” You grumbled out, looking at the retreating figure of Jisoo, slightly fixing your jeans skirt as the last of his footsteps finally left the vicinity.
“Hey, I don't wanna be here either, okay? My mom just wanted to give you some rice cakes she picked up from the city today.” He picked out a box of red bean rice cakes and handed them to you.
You looked at him with a warm smile, “Thanks. Tell Auntie I’m really grateful. I don’t know how she knew I was craving it today.”
He nodded and awkwardly shuffled around, ignoring the way his ears warmed at the sight of your smile. There wasn't much to do now in the small, cramped room that was your kitchen.
“I’m going now. Bye.” He walked towards the rusted red door, and a creak played out as he pulled it open. Cool, dry air flowed in thick layers. He put his hands in his pockets and adjusted them. A little scrap of paper fell from his pocket, falling at your doorstep. Before his body fully left your view, he pulled his head into the doorway,
“It’s winter, idiot. Wear more clothes. And keep some rice cakes for your family too. It’s not all for you, you know?”
-
Choi Hansol didn't spend much time with you guys like he used to. It was rare nowadays for all five of you to gather on the same day. After he started taking Chess professionally, he was only free very late at night, or the hours before sunrise when he wasn’t sleeping. Hansol dropped out of school after earning his FIDE master title at the ripe age of 16. There wasn't a point in staying in school when the tournaments earned him thousands comfortably. The whole neighbourhood cheered for weeks, and Hansol couldn't leave the chess association club without reporters swamping him for days.
But today was special. The whole gang sat in a circle in Hansol’s room, celebrating Jeonghan’s sister’s birthday. A clear case lay on the floor, a new cassette from Jeonghan’s favourite artist already playing in the background. You were seated between Jeonghan and Jisoo, slightly leaning on Jisoo as Jeonghan rambled on about how his vision worsened due to his overuse of the television he received last year for his 17th birthday. And as it was a special day, marinated fried fish was cooked by Jeonghan’s mother to celebrate.
“-and I don't know what this doctor's problem was, but he seemed way too excited to tell my dad that I'll be needing glasses, something about goddamn teenagers always glued to the screen!” Jeonghan grumbled as he shoved another spoonful of dry rice into his mouth, talking between gulps, “So now my dad’s taking away my TV until I get my grades for history up!”
Seungcheol ate his meal quietly and watched as you skillfully removed the bones of a piece of fish with your chopsticks and your wrists manoeuvred the tools with practised professionalism. The chunk was then transferred to Hansol, who had dark circles around his eyes and was holding onto his chopsticks only barely.
“Hansol, what time did you even sleep last night?” Seungcheol asked with a crease on his lip, worried about the treasure of their neighbourhood.
“Ah, don’t worry, guys. I didn't really get much sleep last night. I was busy studying a new game. It took a bit of time, but I slept a few hours in the afternoon today.” Hansol said with a weak smile.
“Hansol, how are you going to win your matches if you're only barely awake?” Jisoo chastised, worried about his close friend.
Hansol just nodded his head, listening carefully to his friends’ chiding scoldings.
As the meal continued, the gang all assisted Hansol in some way. Seungcheol kept ladling more soy bean soup into his bowl, Jisoo refilled Hansol’s water, Jeonghan handed Hansol the plate of greens that was furthest from him, and you continued to scan chunks of fish for small bones before piling it onto his now empty bowl.
This was the dynamic that was comforting to your friend group. You all took care of one another in some way, but you all were also united in the way you all took care of the star of your block. To the world, he was the untouchable and only rising star boy Choi Hansol, but to the four of you who had grown up along with him, he was a friend and treasure to protect and care for.
-
“Guys, I’m going to go now, it’s getting kinda late.” You yawned, stretching your limbs out as the sun began to set, and a dark red glow overcame Hansol’s room.
“Oh yeah, before you leave,” Jisoo stopped you and handed you a sheet of carefully folded paper, “Could you ask your older sister to read my personal statement out for me? She probably knows what's good and not, since she's already in university,” Jisoo mumbled out.
You stopped and looked at him with hearts in your eyes. Hansol and Jeonghan were in the middle of a conversation about his next tournament, but Seungcheol watched on as you nodded bashfully and took the sheet meekly. He dropped the comic book from his hand and felt his heart pang. What was this feeling? Why were you suddenly so shy around Jisoo? Yeah, sure, Jisoo was a good-looking guy and had a few admirers across the school and town, but wasn’t he just a friend? If a relationship were to begin between the two of you (Seungcheol was praying, and he never really did, but he was praying that the day wouldn’t come), wouldn’t it be awkward for the rest? The quintet would be split into a couple and a trio, and Seungcheol didn't like the sound of that. He would be okay with it if it were him instead of Jisoo, but-
Wait, what?
No.
Seungcheol stood up hurriedly, shaking his head. The four of you looked on curiously. These thoughts are only temporary, Seungcheol.
“Guys, my mom told me to get home early, gotta run.” He garbled. He grabbed his coat and rushed out of Hansol’s room, and walked briskly to the entrance, where he began to tie his shoes. He didn't know why, but he wasn't able to tie them well. He tied them. Then untied them.
The door opened, and you came out of the door, smiling ear to ear as you waved everyone goodbye and good night. “Goodbye, guys! Bye Jisoo, sleep well.”
Seungcheol continued tying his shoes, and this time, it felt right. You were now walking towards him, and wore your shoes without tying them, creasing the almost torn sneakers that you’d been using for the past four years now. His new, white, expensive pair of sneakers made yours look extra shabby. But he didn’t care. Maybe he’d gift you a new pair on your next birthday.
“Hey, didn't you have to leave early?” You asked once you joined him at the entrance. You were wearing a grey fleece sweater, but you were still shivering slightly.
“Oh, yeah, it wasn’t really that big of a deal.” He said, looking away from you.
You nodded and walked ahead of him, shivering and warming yourself with self-hugs.
Seungcheol walked a few steps behind you, his hands tightening on his warm coat. His hands were almost extending the coat towards your shoulders, but he hesitated and let his hands drop fully. He shook his head. This will only fuel my delusions.
“This is my stop. Good night, Seungcheol.” You turned around and bid him goodbye as you reached home and walked down the stairs to your basement home.
“This is our stop.” He mumbled into the cool evening air as the coat lay lonely in his arm.
-
It was a Saturday afternoon, and the four of you, minus Hansol (who was at a tournament in Kyoto and wouldn’t return until Monday), were watching a movie in Hansol’s room. The four of you were eating Ramen in the sunny afternoon and were discussing upcoming plans for the winter.
“Guys, I have something I wanna tell you.” Jisoo suddenly announces seriously. Everyone looked towards him, and the room suddenly turned quiet in anticipation.
“I like someone. And I don't know what to do about it.”
The room went crazy as the cacophony of your and Jeonghan’s squeals filled the walls.
Seungcheol couldn’t believe his ears. He watched Jisoo watch your reaction, and he watched on at how all your teeth were visible from the toothy grin you had sprawled over your face. Jisoo’s face warmed with embarrassment. Jeonghan prodded Jisoo on the person’s identity, and Jisoo had walls high, protecting this person's identity with a passion.
Seungcheol felt his stomach plummet. He knew what was coming. He wasn't blind. He saw the trips Jisoo made to your house. I mean, Jisoo had to pass his house before reaching yours. He saw the way you applied lip tint when Jisoo was present. He saw Jisoo carry small trinkets from your house to his. He saw Jisoo borrow batteries for his sister's toy, knowing well that Jisoo’s mom didn't allow his baby sister to have electronic toys yet. It was just an excuse to see you.
The giggles slowed down until there was a brief moment of silence.
“Confess.” You spoke confidently, after deliberation. “Confess on the day of the first snow. Your love will come true.” You promised with a warm smile.
Seungcheol felt bile rise. He needed to leave before he felt suffocated by his own emotions of grief. Why wouldn’t you look at him like that?
-
From his room, Seungcheol watched the night sky. Everyone was probably asleep by now. The street was quiet, and a deep lull fell over the community. The window of his room was slightly frosted as nighttime temperatures plummeted. He was at his desk, writing gibberish over his physics book. He didn't know why, but he felt like tonight was going to change something.
From his window, he caught a head moving from the corner of his eye. What was Jisoo doing outside this late?
Then, snow fell.
They fell in small flakes at first, and Seungcheol's heart stopped.
He snatched his coat and walked into the freezing winter towards your house. The walls were thin, and although he didnt wanna eavesdrop, he probably had to listen to this confession to get over you. Yeah, I admit it. I like you.
Jisoo called out your name softly.
Seungcheol could guess you tilted your head, waiting for the confession.
“Could you get your older sister for me?” Jisoo asked bashfully.
Seungcheol’s eyes widened, and his heart felt a little lighter.
“Why?” You asked, dense as ever, not understanding what your sister has to do with your looming first relationship.
“Well, because it's snowing... and you told me to confess on the day of the first snow.”
It was silent for a good few seconds.
“Ah, Jisoo, she's not home right now. She went on a retreat with her university friends. Good luck to you, though! And don't worry, I'll keep it a secret from the others for you.” He heard you chuckle out after a few seconds.
You guys conversed for a few seconds, but Seungcheol wasn’t listening anymore. I still have a chance!
The corrugated metal flap creaked, and Jisoo made his way out. Seungcheol hid between the empty storage crates so Jisoo wouldn’t notice him eavesdropping.
Jisoo likes her older sister. That means that I still have a chance!
Jisoo left. The snow kept falling, and Seungcheol still felt relief.
A silent wail came from within the entrance of your home. Seungcheol recognized it as your cry. His heart wrenched, hearing you cry. His good friend, who always had something to say. He couldn’t bear it. His hand grew closer to the handle of your door. He wanted to comfort you, curse Jisoo out for leading you on, and hug you. His hand shrank away as he heard you come closer towards the door, possibly hearing his footsteps.
Seungcheol rapidly retreated to his own house, feeling relieved with the newfound revelations.
-
First love was blooming over the streets of his childhood block. For Jisoo, it was the ever-looming confession to your older sister that he hadn’t uttered yet. For Seungcheol, it was the love he felt for you since last year, quietly brewing in his chest. There were silent moments at night where he’d wait for you to return from the library after late-night study sessions. He would be waiting in the alley with an umbrella, handing it to you, before rushing in the rain back home, leaving behind a bewildered you. He couldn’t sleep for another hour, and finally slept at 2 am.
For Seungcheol, first love made him do insane things.
Things like showing up to a coffee shop for you when you called him at four in the afternoon, rushing to get his coat, and telling his mom rapidly that he'll be back before lunch.
He wore a new shirt, his mom told him he looked rather dashing in, and wore his dad’s cologne, before tying the red shoes he saw you eyeing the other day. He almost bought you a bouquet. But then he shook his head and thought he might be going crazy.
-
Your two friends greeted him as you eyed him suspiciously. Why would he even come? This cafe is in the middle of Seoul. It didn't make sense coming all the way to the city centre from your neighbourhood just for some coffee.
“Hi, yes, nice to meet you. I’m Choi Seunghceol.” He bowed and said his hellos respectfully.
“I thought it was just gonna be the two of us.” He said quietly. His words, unfortunately, were heard by your friends, who weren’t offended at all and looked at one another, curiosity brewing, and realised that something else was going on between the two of you.
January 1989, Seoul, Seungcheol.
Seungcheol pocketed the two tickets to a concert that was taking place next week. He thinks this might be a good time to ask you out, and possibly get closer.
It was another one of those nights where Seungcheol waited at the alley. He was waiting for you to come home from another late-night study session. He was looking over at the tickets. He had to wait in line for two hours to snag these tickets. The price was outrageous, but he knew you liked this artist dearly; you were always humming her songs on the bus ride to school.
He heard footsteps edge closer to where he was standing. He straightened up, fixed his bun, and let the hair fall into his face. It was chilly, and he was sure his cheeks were crimson. From the weather and also due to the fact that he was going to ask you out.
Your eyes widened in surprise as you made eye contact with his figure.
“Hmm? Seungcheol? Waiting for me again?” You teased.
“It’s not like that idiot. Anyways. I wanted to ask if you,” he paused. His nerves were getting to him, and it was hard to speak when you looked so youthful and warm under the cold moonlight. “Go to her concert with me. It’s on a Saturday, so I know you’re free and all.”
It was quiet.
You looked up at him with wide eyes, and he noticed your lips were parted and slightly cracking in the cool winter. You gulped.
“Come.” He mumbled.
“Come with me.”
You nodded hurriedly and took the ticket.
“Oh, and,”
You looked at him once more, seeing this side of Seungcheol for the first time.
“Come home a little earlier, will you? It’s our neighbourhood, yeah, but it can be unsafe.”
-
Seungcheol thinks your friends have said something to you. He noticed that you’ve been paying more attention to him nowadays. He should thank your two friends someday.
As the gang sat down in Hansol’s room, you shoved Jeonghan to the side and took his place beside Seungcheol. His ears warmed, and he looked away. He felt you look at him, and his heart seemed to be growing louder by the second.
What is going on… I’m not complaining, but this is all new.
Hansol sat to your right and was struggling with opening a can of soda. His nails were often bitten and bloody from the stress of Chess. Without taking your eyes off the TV screen, you snapped the tab of the can and offered it to him, even with a straw that you pulled out of your jeans.
Hansol was smiling and patted your head in gratitude. Jeonghan let out a loud burp, and Jisoo smacked his head, annoyed with his antics again. The room rumbled as you told them all to shut it, and you had your eyes glued to the movie displayed.
After about an hour, the movie ended. Hansol had gone back to biting his thumb as the conversation about the upcoming week's plans commenced. You noticed Hansol’s practice. Annoyed, you smacked his thumb away from his mouth.
The sound of skin thwacking brought attention to you two, and Seungcheol teased you in faux annoyance. “Hey, don't hurt our little treasure, or else you’ll have to take responsibility and take care of him for the rest of your life.”
“That’s no problem with me. I take good care of Hansol, too, you know?” You said with an air of pride and self-righteousness surrounding you.
“Oh? Look at Hansol, all blushing. Don't tell me you like her?” Jisoo teased.
“Guys don't say weird stuff,” You chided as all five of you giggled.
Conversations sprang from the five of you, and you guys eventually started talking about how Jisoo’s baby sister might start kindergarten soon. Time really flew.
-
“I’m gonna go buy some snacks for us from the corner store. What do you guys want?” You asked as you picked up your thin coat.
“Squid crackers!” “Ice cream, please.” “Ice cream for me, too, please.” Voices rang out.
“Hansol, you?”
“It’s okay, nothing for me. Get back soon, it's cold.” Jeonghan and Jisoo eyed Hansol as he uttered the words, while you and Seungcheol looked at one another.
“Do you want me to come with you?” Seungcheol asked.
“No, it's okay. I'll be back soon, okay?” You say warmly, with a meek smile.
“Hey, no, seriously, do you like her?” Jisoo asked Hansol.
Everyone in the room is smiling. Seungcheol forces one out. He doesn’t really like the way the conversation is going.
“Hey, there’s no wa-” Seungcheol silently voices out, before he’s interrupted, painstakingly.
“I do like her. I’ve liked her for a while now.” Hansol states, with a gentle smile, as he looks down at his nails on his lap.
Seungcheol feels a blur pass over his ears. Please, no, not again.
The conversation is tossed between Jisoo, Jeonghan, and Hansol. Seungcheol listens in and faintly nods. Seungcheol thinks he’s going to be sick.
“And, I think I’m going to confess soon,” Hansol states with a face of naive determination.
The room grows silent.
“Oh my, our Hansol is all grown up.” Jeonghan teases. The three boys laugh on. Seungcheol joins half-heartedly. He wants to be happy at the thought of his friends together, but his heart feels like it's being pierced. The thought of you smiling into Hansol’s shoulder suddenly bangs against his brain, and he knows that a chess game has begun.
-
You decided to dress well today. You wore your best, cleanest undershirt and wore a pink thick sweater. Yes, it was winter. But you wore your jeans skirt. It made you look good! The concert wasn’t going to start until seven, but here you were, all ready by four. You were going to meet Seungcheol outside of your home. Your parents were out of the house, and your sister was who knows where. You didn't really care.
You were waiting outside your house at six. Seungcheol was going to come out anytime. Your mom arrived home about thirty minutes ago and was busy preparing dinner.
Your mom screamed your name, and you ran down the stairs, rushing home. Seungcheol could wait a minute or two, right?
“You got a call,” your mom calls out as she walks into the kitchen.
You furrowed your eyebrows. Who could it be?
“Hello?”
“It’s Seungcheol. You should go to the concert without me tonight.”
“Huh, what the heck? Why? Weren't we supposed to go together?”
“I can't make it today.”
“Why?”
“Cus I can't? Can your idiot mind just take that for an answer? I don't wanna go!”
You hung up before he said his final words.
-
Seungcheol, on the other side of the line, slammed the receiver back down and walked to his room before slamming his door shut. Thankfully, his family was out of town at a relative's wedding, or else he would’ve gotten disciplined for his behaviour.
He cursed out and lay on his bed, tears welling up at his water line.
He had to grow apart. He can't get too attached. He can't do that to his friend Hansol.
-
It was about eight at night. You should be at the concert, enjoying yourself. So when he saw your head walk away from the street, from the entrance of your home, from his bedroom, Seungcheol grew confused.
He followed you, holding his coat, noticing you were wearing only your thin home clothes.
He noticed you walking towards the staircase at the end of your street, where you sat down and just broke down, sobbing.
He wanted to walk to you and apologise so badly. He’d get on his knees if you’d like. He’d buy you those rice cakes that you so badly craved. He’d apologise until you’d smile. Anything for you.
He was thinking about whether he should take a step towards you or not when Hansol walked into view, coming home from the chess club at night.
Seungcheol stepped back.
Hansol immediately noticed and took off his coat and wrapped it around you.
You looked up at Hansol and sobbed into his left shoulder. Hansol, who grew to be a bear, his feelings all hidden and silent, took a step towards you, patted your shoulder, and let himself shoulder the unknown pain you were carrying. He wanted you to feel okay, whenever that would be.
Seungcheol watched silently from the corner. He wished he were Hansol. He felt his legs tremble from the cold. But he knew it wasn't just the weather that was affecting him. It was the fact that you were crying because of him, because of his actions, and there wasn't anything he could do about it.
-
Seungcheol was sitting on the steps to your home. He was checking his watch. His heart grew heavier, realising how long he’s been spending with Hansol. Why him?
He heard you trudging towards him, and he stood up and felt his vision whiten for a second.
You saw him. You glared at him and tried to swerve past him.
“Hey,” Seungcheol mumbled.
You rolled your eyes and tried to swerve past him again.
“Hey,” he repeated firmly, and he held your shoulders to keep you in place.
“What do you want now?” You muttered.
“I wanna apologise. I’m sorry. It wasn’t right of me to cancel at the last minute, and in such a rude way without an explanation either.”
“Yeah, it wasn't right.” You said, looking away from him.
“And I'll give you a proper explanation now,” he said, stalling.
“Which is..?”
He felt like sweating. Was he going to confess to you, right here and right now? In the freezing winter? Should he be honest with you right now? Who knows, maybe you feel the same way-
“I wasn't feeling well, to be honest. I walked home yesterday in the snow, so I wasn't really up for going out today.” He lied.
Silence.
“That’s it? My gosh, you should’ve told me yesterday straight away, I wouldn’t have gotten mad, you know. I'm your friend too!”
Yeah, friend.
February 1989, Seoul, Seungcheol.
It was cleaning day for Seungcheol. he was getting rid of clothes left and right that he had grown out of. Eventually, he looked at the pink cotton shirt you gifted him on his birthday last year. He didn't really like pink. But you got it for him, so just like you, he liked it too. It lay on his desk as he looked over it. You were smart and ripped the price tag off, but he knew you scoured every piggy bank in your room to save enough money for his birthday gift. His heart beamed at the fact that you cared so much.
He smiled, looking at the shirt. It looked comfortable and easy to breathe in. It was very Seungcheol, aside from the colour, which was very you. It made him blush as he looked at it.
His older brother walked into his room.
“Seungcheol, can I borrow your stapler? Mine has pins stuck to it.” He said.
His older brother was eyeing his shirt. Seungcheol saw right through his brother.
“Hey, can I borrow this shirt someday? I wanna wear it on a date-”
“No,” Seungcheol stated while handing his brother the stapler.
“Not this one.”
-
It was an early morning to school, and winter was beginning to fall from its peak. The bus was extremely packed, and all the seats were distributed to the elderly, and you were holding onto a handrail, that too barely. You were getting slammed, left to right, as the bus driver showed no mercy on the roads, manoeuvring the bus in a way that left you feeling sick.
As the brakes were slammed once more, you thrashed forward, falling onto a businessman who was sleeping against a seat, tired and very obviously sleep-deprived. The push you gave him woke him up, and you gave him an apologetic smile.
This continued for a while, you getting pushed around, bumping into various people, growing overwhelmed and uncomfortable by the second.
Suddenly, you didn't feel the push anymore. Strong arms were respectfully placed next to you, keeping you in place. Alarmed, you tried to turn around, but there wasn't much space. Using your hands, you tried to push the hands away.
You felt the person flinch.
“Relax, idiot. It’s just me. Don’t want you falling out of the window without me being there to witness it.”
You nodded. You didn't know Seungcheol could be this considerate.
“Oh, you idiot. You gonna invest in some gloves? It’s already February, and you're still freezing.” He whispered from behind you.
Maybe Seungcheol should buy you those pink gloves you’re always complaining about, never saving enough for.
-
Seungcheol was looking at the night sky once again. He was alone, sitting on the patio. He noticed that he's been doing this a lot as of late.
He doesn’t understand why this is happening to him. Your smile, which usually brought him so much euphoria, was now inflicting pain on him.
Today, when the gang was eating ice cream together at the corner store, Hansol got some chocolate ice cream on the corner of his lip. You, of course, wiped it off with your thumb, but not before chastising him for not being able to eat well at the age of 18. Then you smiled and ate the chocolate ice cream left on your thumb.
Seungcheol watched awkwardly as the two of you were left in a silent, smiling reverie. There wasn't much he could do.
Why couldn't Hansol just be a bad person? Seungcheol so badly wished that his friend were a bad person. A person who was awful, someone who was horrible. It would make hating him easier. He could hate him for liking his first love, too. It was stupid, Seungcheol was aware, but his heart clenched every time Hansol inched closer to you.
But realistically, how could he hate Hansol? Hansol, who had handed him a hot, wafting Bungeo-ppang earlier today when he was rubbing his hands closely together at the corner store, freezing.
February 1989, Seoul, You.
Hansol lost a tournament big time. It was on live TV and made it to the news. It generally was not a good day.
You were coming back from the corner shop after buying snacks. The days were turning out to be still very dry and freezing, but that didn't stop you from going on a supply run.
It was about seven in the evening, and you were walking home, enjoying the crackers you ate, and skipping as you turned into the alley where your house resided.
You paused. Hansol was begrudgingly walking home. You heard about the loss from your dad, who was watching the news once he got home. You felt for him, your hard-working friend who always pushed himself to extremes.
Hansol spotted you. You gave him a half-hearted wave and walked towards him. Words didn’t have to be spoken. The two of you had an unspoken understanding and felt comforted by one another.
You offered him your crackers.
He smiled weakly and shook his head with a no. He came towards you, and suddenly, you were in his bubble. He looked into your eyes with his innocent intensity, and you never realised how much Hansol had changed. His face matured, and his cheekbones had become so much more defined than the chubby face he had when you guys were introduced at age five.
His face fell towards the shorter one. His warm forehead rested on your covered shoulder. It’s been a while since he embraced you. You didn't know why, but something was different about today. But you let it be. He needed this.
He spoke your name so softly that I just barely caught it, even though he was resting on your shoulder.
“It’s okay for me to lose, right?”
Your heart clenched. His words, the pressure he carried, it was immensely crazy. This was Hansol, Choi Hansol, your friend of 13 years. You fell into his embrace and patted him.
“It’s completely fine. You did your best, Hansol.”
“Your hands are so cold. Go in now.” He said, falling back from the comforting hug you both shared.
“You go in too.” You replied, smiling and patting his hair.
Was he just your friend, right? So why did your heart thunder against your ears when you saw him entering his house?
You didn't notice the eyes watching above you, slamming the lights of his room close once the sound of the corrugated metal thrashed against the concrete.
The very next morning, pink gloves were deposited at your doorstep. Your younger brother told you that Hansol handed them off to him when he was on the way to the chess club.
Hansol was a good friend, you thought. Your heart probably disagreed.
February 1989, Seoul, Seungcheol.
Seungcheol woke up early. His brother was making a racket around the house, something about going on a date with his girlfriend. Seungcheol didn't really care. He just wanted breakfast.
He heard a knock on the door and went out to check who it was. You were standing there, in a white sweater, all cosy, with thick fleece pants, slightly shivering. He was reminded of the night he saw you embracing Hansol and suddenly felt like throwing up.
“Mom! I’m leaving for my date now! Wish me luck!” His brother screamed from inside the house.
“Ah, Seungcheol, morning. My mom wanted to ask if your family had some rice to spare.” You told him, rubbing sleep from your eyes.
Before he could agree, his brother stepped out and fixed his shirt.
“Don't I look dashing?” His brother asked you.
You, for some reason, looked more awake, looking at the shirt with blank eyes. It was pink. Pleated, cotton, and comfortable. Looked like the one you gifted Seungcheol. In fact, it was the one you gifted Seungcheol.
Seungcheol’s eyes widened. He didn't know what his brother did, but he knew his shirt was in his wardrobe. He had checked it just this morning.
His brother gave you a small salute and walked away, all giddy about his date.
Before Seungcheol could explain, he saw the tears welling in your eyes.
“Forget it. I'll ask Jeonghan’s family instead.”
Maybe Seungcheol should’ve explained, rather than letting you walk away.
-
“Don't I look handsome?” Seungcheol’s brother asked his girlfriend.
“Of course, I was the one who bought it for you, love. Is it the one you saw, right? Is it the correct one?” his girlfriend replied.
Seungcheol’s brother nodded. He felt a little embarrassed copying his younger brother, but a good shirt was a good shirt.
February 1990, Seoul, Hansol.
Hansol’s birthday was a small event from ages one to five. His parents did their best to make him happy, and once it was just him and his father, it was a day where they ate breakfast, his father handed him a hard-earned gift, and Hansol would jump into his father's arms, and the day would go on.
That changed once he moved to the new street, his father said, would be good for them. His birthdays were days he often looked forward to. The whole block would gather. The kids would get pizzas delivered to Hansol’s room, and the parents would party and watch tv together at one of the houses.
Today was no different.
Pizza was getting eaten left and right, you and Jeonghan argued over the last slice, when Jisoo played a song that you hadn’t heard in a while. Both you and Jeonghan dropped the argument, grabbed one another, and danced along to the silly song.
You swung your arms clumsily, almost clocking Jeonghan in the face.
The other three guffawed at your silliness, and Hansol let out a loud chuckle. He looked around the room to grasp Jisoo and Seungcheol’s reactions.
And there was Seungcheol, staring at you as if you held the world in your arms. He looked at you the same way you’d look at an oasis, someone who’s holding your lifeline. He was laughing with this dazed look in his eyes, never knowing when you’d disappear as you turned Jeonghan around and shook your head. Seungcheol looked at you the way Hansol did. As if he were in love with you.
Hansol’s face fell. The revelation that he wasn't the only one vying for his first love's attention was slightly haunting. He couldn’t do this to his best friend. He couldn’t do that to Seungcheol.
December 1994, Seoul, Seungcheol.
The gang was united for Jisoo’s birthday. It’s been a while since everyone was here. You often stayed at your apartment in central Seoul, which was closer to where you worked. It didn't pay much, but you were sure to climb the ranks soon enough. Jeonghan joined his family’s business, while Jisoo entered medical school. Seungcheol worked in Busan, far away from his home, where the scent of his first love lingered and remained. At least he had an excuse for not being able to come home as often, being stationed in Busan, and staying there. Hansol continued to stay at his childhood home, working hard and earning his International Master's title. The whole gang wasn’t exactly there to celebrate, all busy with work and commute, but you sent a flower vase to his home.
But like six years ago, today was special. Winter was coming close, and the holidays finally coincided. All five of you were home. A weekend back in your childhood street sounded like pure comfort. At least to everyone but Seungcheol. He couldn’t exactly bear your presence. This was not your fault. It was the fact that to this day, Seungcheol chided himself for his actions. Once everyone got busy with college and work, those everyday moments the gang shared slowly dissipated. He never really got to tell you how much he always cared. But perhaps this reunion could be the start of something. Hansol probably has a girlfriend by now. He heard various stories of Hansol’s love life from his bored mother on his daily phone calls.
He entered Hansol’s room, where the rest of the five were already lounging around. Even after six years, and even after the slight tension that formed between Hansol and Seungcheol (suddenly, and was never resolved), the room had remained stuck in time, and had a thick layer of comfort wrapped around it. This was the room of his youth that locked away various memories that he created alongside his friends.
-
After the cake had been cut, after the food had been wiped off the plates, and after all the catching up had been done, the five friends were lying around the room.
“Did your latest boyfriend break up with you again?” Jisoo joked as the topic of partners was brought up.
“Nope. And by the way, I've never been broken up with. We usually have mutual understanding and leave one another amicably.” You snapped, defending your pride childishly.
“Mutual understanding and leaving one another amicably just sounds like you got dumped!” Seungcheol yowls, and the whole room erupts in laughter again.
“Very funny. Laugh all you want, but I’m going to a concert date tomorrow.” You boasted.
“Hold up, is it Seo Taiji and Boys?” Jeonghan asked.
“Yup. Had to stand in line for two hours for it.” You smirked.
Seungcheol knows it's been six years. But hearing you utter the word date, and it not being with him, still ached.
Hansol was doing no better.
-
“-and I just wanna say I’m so sorry, it's not you, it's me, I just don’t think I’m ready for a relationship. Please, enjoy the concert with a friend. I’m really sorry. I hope you find someone better than me.”
You listened to his words through the telephone with a bored look. You didn't really know him that well; you guys only started dating last week! You would miss the concert, but it was okay. You could always go next year.
You sighed.
“Dear, could you go buy some chives and potatoes from the corner store?” Your mom called out.
You nodded, grabbed your wallet, and left.
-
Walking into the street, you noticed the gang already talking with one another, lounging on the stairs outside of Seungcheol’s house, enjoying some coffee together before work.
“Oi! You off to that concert date of yours?” Jisoo joked. It was obvious you weren’t going to the concert, being dressed in only some thin chequered pants and a large oversized sweater.
It was already embarrassing getting dumped for the fourth time this year. You chose to be prideful.
“Yeah. I’m on the way to the concert hall. Why, jealous?” You asked Jisoo sarcastically. You weren’t really upset, and everyone could tell, but it was fun among friends to play along.
“Cmon, I'll give you a lift, it's on the way. Seungcheol and I are going to watch a movie at ten anyway. Your concert is at ten too, right?” Jeonghan offered. You nodded.
“What about you, Hansol? Do you have any work today?” You asked Hansol.
“I have an important match against a grandmaster at ten as well.”
“Well, you guys are all booked and busy! I need to help my sister with maths. Enjoy the concert, movie, and completion!” Jisoo said.
1994 December, concert hall, the same day, You.
You called various friends from high school, asking if anyone was free. You even called a senior who used to tease you for your handwriting. They all declined. It was too last-minute, and commuting to the concert hall would take far too long.
You were beginning to shiver as the last of the ushers began to call everyone into the concert hall, asking everyone with tickets to enter as soon as they could. This was all your doing. Why did you have to be so prideful? They were all your childhood friends… but embarrassing yourself in front of Hansol and the others just seemed too humiliating.
A thick, heavy jacket was laid on your shoulders, and the sound of heavy panting enveloped you. You turned around to glance at who this stranger was, ready to pick a fight, when you noticed his messy waft of hair with a messily made tie in tow.
1994 December, movie theatre, the same day, Seungcheol.
“Do you seriously think she actually got dumped?” Seungcheol asked while waiting in line for tickets.
“Oh yeah for sure,” Jeonghan muttered.
“Then why did you drop her off?” Seungcheol asked with mirth in his voice.
“Eh, I thought she'd just take a taxi back home.” Jeonghan cackles.
The movie was about to start, but Seungcheol felt restless. He should be there, with you. But you said your boyfriend would be there, should he go or should he stay?
Seungcheol shot up. He waited before. He won't wait now.
Jeonghan almost gets up. “Where are you going?” He whispers.
Seungcheol doesn't reply, but he races to his car, where he zooms towards the concert hall with adrenaline rushing into his veins.
Red light. A red light made him wait 30 seconds. He slammed the horns in anger and frustration. This can't be happening now. He’s so tired of time and chance taking away his opportunities for a future together with you.
He parks haphazardly in a no-parking zone and runs full speed towards the entrance, where he sees you.
You weren't alone. You were laughing, as if the world was kept in front of you.
He sees you wrapped in a heavy coat, chatting with Hansol, who holds a blush on his cheeks.
Seungcheol turns around and gets his car ready to go back home.
-
“On to today's chess news. Famous International Master Hansol Choi withdrew from his first match with Grandmaster X due to personal issues. This is the first-ever withdrawal we have seen from the international master in the past eight years of his professional chess career. We wish him the best.”
-
Seungcheol doesn’t feel like walking. He’s still stuck in his car, six hours later, listening to sad songs from his childhood, thinking about why this happened to him.
No. This didn't happen to him. He did this to himself. Perhaps it is due to all the maybes that stopped him, and all the times he hesitated in front of you. He’s cursing at himself. At first, it started off with him blaming his surroundings. The red light failed him, his speed failed him. Then realist action hit. Why didn't he go to that concert with you? Why didn't he ever explain that the shirt you gifted is still stuck in his childhood bedroom, unopened and forever cherished? Why did he care so much about being cool and uncaring? Why couldn't he comfort you the night Jisoo left you crying? Why didn't he get to you first when you went crying after he cancelled the concert? Why was he unnecessarily rude? Why was it that every single time you felt cold, he let you fend for yourself, even though he had his coat ready, and all he had to do was extend his hand? Why didn't he confess that day? Why? Why him? Maybe Hansol wanted you more and was more forward about it. Why couldn’t Hansol be a bad person, so you’d fall for Seungcheol instead? Why does it hurt so much to watch you take care of Hansol, when Hansol has been doing the same this whole time? Why didn't he get you the gloves you so desperately wanted? What about the shoes you constantly creased? Why did Seungcheol wait around until Hansol swooped in with soft pink yarn gloves, adorned on your hands that eventful winter six years ago? Maybe all he could blame was himself.
1994 December, Christmas, a nearby restaurant, Seungcheol.
It’s been a few weeks since the concert. The parents were all enjoying dinner together, and so the kids (who are now all in their mid-twenties) all decided to have a hearty dinner at a nearby restaurant in the neighbourhood that opened well after they all left for work and university.
Hansol was late. He was finishing up a tournament, and so it was only the four of you for now.
Seungcheol sat across from you and drank his water silently, chuckling at Jeonghan’s antics.
“-And then she confessed to him. Can you believe it?” Jeonghan was reenacting the story of how his parents met.
“Yes, we can,” Seungcheol chuckles.
Jeonghan turns towards Seungcheol, now choosing his target.
“Guess we’ll all grow old before we see you confessing to anyone.” He chuckled.
It grew silent as the chuckles between you four died down.
Seungcheol called out your name.
You looked towards him.
“I like you.”
The table grows silent as Jisoo and Jeonghan eye one another, wondering what is going on.
“Do you know how much I've liked you over the past seven years? You who always had something to say to me? Do you know how many times I went crazy thinking about how you always reached home after studying at one in the morning? I was in the freezing cold because I wanted to see you so much. I just always wanted to be around you and bask in your presence. I’d always beg my mom to buy you those crazy expensive red bean rice cakes you’d like, and I stood two hours to get that concert ticket we never went to. I had to pretend to tie my shoes multiple times so we could walk to and from school together; that’s how badly I always wanted to be around you. Do you know I avoided coming home because you were always lingering around? I just liked you so much, and there was nothing I could do about it. I’m sorry I never did anything about it.”
The table was silent, and your eyes were glossy.
Seungcheol chuckled and turned towards Jeonghan.
“You happy, Jeonghan?”
“Huh, what?”
“You said we’d all grow old before you saw me confess to someone. I’m somewhat of an actor myself, you know.” Seungcheol confesses.
“Man, I almost believed that, that was crazy good!” Jisoo laughs.
You and Seungcheol look at one another for a second, and there's a common understanding between you two. Jisoo and Jeonghan may believe Seungcheol’s lie, but you listen to the confession earnestly and offer genuine closure.
The restaurant's entrance bell chimes, and your head snaps towards the door.
Seungcheol watches as you deflate in disappointment, when a lady walks in, instead of Hansol.
Checkmate.
Hansol won.
Bonus:
December 1988, Seoul, you.
Pfft, he's so stupid, you thought. You closed the door behind him as you shoved the rice cakes into your mouth, enjoying their sweet, chewy taste.
You see the paper he dropped.
Now he’s littering too!
Mom, can you please, please go to the city today? I don't know why, but I’m craving red bean rice cakes today. Please. Thanks.
You know for a fact that Seungcheol hates the chewiness of rice cakes.
end ˎˊ˗
a/n: thank u my wonderful friends for reading. thinking back, I wrote this two years ago and kept it hidden for a good while... oops. but yeah.. were u guys rooting for cheol? or hansol? or jisoo even... comments, likes and weblogs are always appreciated but never compulsory. let me know what u thought in the comments if you'd like :D love reading your thoughts ◝(ᵔᗜᵔ)◜
Hiiii just wanted to say that yacttp and yours were super cute! I really enjoyed seeing both sides of the story and if you do ever make the a smau I’d be totally down to read it but no pressure of course! Thank you so much for writing and hope you’re doing well! 💕🫶💕🫶
omg js got my first anon HELLO MY DEAR FRIEND 💕
thank you for staying til the end for seungcheol and mc's story <3 its support like yours that kept me going heheheh :3
idk if theres a set date for the smau, but ill try getting it out :DDDD
I'm doing well, and I hope you're doing amazing. Have a lovely morning/afternoon/evening
synopsis: Seungcheol always considered himself to be yours. That had always been true and will be true. He considered himself to be a rather good friend, thank you very much and always had your back behind the scenes. If only the transition between friends and lovers were as easy. The trials and tribulation of Choi Seungcheol as he battled his own instincts while falling hard for his old friend were never going to be simple.
Five times Seungcheol wanted to have a meal with you, and the one time while eating, you didn't leave things as they were.
word count: 8.4k
notes, warnings: part two to you always come to the party. it is important that you read it for the plot to make sense. best friend seungcheol x reader, fem!reader, she/her pronouns, non idol au, Seungcheol and reader are the same age. there's a lot of past lore. kind of insecure and hesitant seungcheol as this is his pov of the events from part one. a lot of the same plot, but his side. theres some texting, CRINGR attempt at humor… seventeen, twice, eunha(gfriend/viviz) and hyeri(girl’s day) members make cameos, reader lowkey don’t listen to seungcheol, THEY FIGHT AND ARGUE…. BUT MAKE UP (kinda), CURSE WORDS. ALCOHOL CONSUMPTION Important, this is fictional and does not express reality about the actual members of seventeen
authors note: hey guys. thank you for your love and support. I'm in tears. more from me at the end later. enjoy reading! <3 also this is based off of yours by damon's year. the lyrics also make sense in this context hehe. ALSO English isn’t my first language, apologies for any grammatical errors 💔
⇜ PREVIOUS | CURRENT | NEXT ⇝
masterlist/navigation
Barbecue 🍖
Initially, when Seungcheol had asked if you were free for dinner, he was planning to just eat with you in silence. He had everything planned out: a place close to yours, delicious food, and candlelight for its ambience. But when you mentioned not having seen the rest of your friends in a while, he couldn’t help but wonder out loud about having a group gathering instead.
Which led to the current scenario, where he watched you gulp down a shot that wasn’t yours in the first place. You did it often, feeling paternal for the younger ones (which they were barely), and he saw the wince you took as the alcohol burned its way down your throat. It was as if the world was at half-speed. Everyone was cheering you on, but from his point of view, everyone’s voices were malfigured— almost haunting.
He’d liked you for a good while now. He remembered seeing you join his and Jeonghan’s class back in high school, and he considered himself a goner since then. You had a hard time at first, since the class had travelled together from elementary to their bubbling teenhood. Seungcheol was proud to think that he took you under his wing, but if Joshua heard any of that, he’d laugh in Seungcheol’s face.
Rather, it was you who took Seungcheol under your coat.
Seungcheol was the youngest in his family, but at school, he could break from those rules placed on him and earned respect on his own terms. Class president, Captain of the Football team, friends with the cafeteria ladies, Top of the class, almost any achievement, and Seungcheol would already have it grasped or was on his way to making it.
When you guys initially became friends, he felt the need to prove himself to you, as well. He’d always felt a pang of happiness when he’d been picked first for the seekers team when playing hide and seek at the ripe age of eight. He’d grown out of it, of course, but he couldn’t help but try to grab your bag one day, as you both walked home after school.
The sky was turning more ochre by the second. It was going to be six any moment, and yet, both of your steps only grew slower. His panting had stopped earlier when you both dropped by the convenience store for ice cream. Football practice today was extremely brutal. He’d argued with a junior in the locker room before apologizing and running off to the school entrance, where you’d been waiting, smile on your face. Your eyes sparkled a lot back then.
Without really thinking about it, he took your bag from your back and added to his load.
You stopped and looked at him.
“Don’t carry my bag, especially when you’re tired. You don’t always have to be the strong one.”
And without looking at his face, you’d snatch your bag and take his football bag in one go and run forward.
He huffed, a smile on his face, and chased after you, the weight on his shoulder a tad lighter, watching you scurry on ahead.
Your youthful figure transitioned to the bent version of yourself in front of him, hoisting Hyeri’s almost-limp self off your hip. His head shook at this memory as Soonyoung coughed against his shoulder in the elevator. When did you find the time to take care of everyone, even mighty Choi Seungcheol? He’d then watched you hunch your back, unlacing Hyeri’s shoes before setting Soonyoung onto your couch easily, then preparing water for you.
You’d dragged yourself onto his shoulders eventually. His stomach was still hungry for something. He didn’t know when he’d get to sit down with you and rest. He was tired, but he knew about your state too. To him, the silent was daft. It was dense, but not uncomfortably so. It was only uncomfortable because his throat felt scratchy, for what he was thinking but did not know how to phrase. He wished you could see yourself the way he saw you. A precious friend who also deserved to be protected and hidden away.
“Why’d you do it?” He'd finally murmured, after thinking long.
“What did I do, Cheol?” You had hissed, most likely from pain.
To you, it was just another unforgettable moment, but to him, it was as if time stood still when he watched you slip the drink in without much complaint and restraint. Even though he was worried, he'd collected his thoughts and formulated a neutral response. “Drink Soonie’s punishment shot. You know you didn’t have to, right?” He couldn't help but press against your temple. He knew alcohol often left you in shambles.
“I know, but I wanted to.”
He felt such fondness wrap around him as he heard your genuine response. Your voice sounded vulnerable in a way it hadn’t in a while. It was as if Seungcheol was transported back to the days of your youths, enjoying summer nights with ice cream battles and football practices all over again. Of course, he’d missed the days you all spent carefully, up to the tears he had shed at graduation, thinking you looked like a bright, summery dream in your own graduation cap. Now, in his eyes, he felt as if you had been shrinking as the days passed by, constantly cocooned in work. Seungcheol couldn’t think back to the last time when the two of you enjoyed a simple meal where he felt your shoulders droop, in happiness. He’d like to plan something soon enough, if you’d let him, that is.
He’d waited until your breathing slowed, your body limp, and helped you into bed. Seeing the two girls sleeping side by side, he uttered a quiet confession next to your sleeping ears.
“I want to be the strong one for you.”
Knife-cut noodles 🍜
Wonwoo had actually asked Seungcheol out for lunch earlier, but he had declined. It wasn’t because Seungcheol wasn’t hungry, but more so because it was a Tuesday. The only day when both you and Seungcheol could have lunch together. On Tuesdays, Seungcheol’s Lunch breaks started a whole thirty minutes earlier than yours, meaning he was free to travel around and had time to drive into Gangnam for no apparent reason. He was just loitering during his break. Of course.
The two of you had called in late at night while you prepared your presentation, and he was sipping tea by your side, going through his unanswered emails. Sleep came to him especially late, and not until he heard your tired snores erupt through his speaker.
He felt guilty when he found out that Wonwoo eventually ended up leaving an important file behind at some random restaurant and saw your messages. Already on the way, he sent some messages into the group chat, only for them to fall on silent (more so distracted) ears.
He almost stumbles into Mrs Kong’s restaurant, seeing a rather grumpy man at the front desk.
“My friend, file, forgot it here.” He somehow lets out, breath almost lost from running into the store. Parking was insane around this area.
The uncle looks on, unimpressed.
“You’re late, son. A pretty lady already picked it up looooong ago!” The man said with an attitude unbecoming of such a kind, youthful, and old face.
Seungcheol internally groaned. He knew how ambitious you were. He knew how amazingly well you were able to handle time crunches. He was the same; the two of you were cut from similar cloth. It was a bit amazing when he stopped to look at your work ethic from afar, but as the man who’d been in love with you for quite some time, he had understood well enough how anxious and nervous you probably got. If he was calculating your lunch break and driving time, you were probably only reaching your office by now.
“Forget it then,” Seungcheol looked at the name tag on the uncle’s flower vest, “Uncle Pi Cheolin, may I have noodles to go?”
The man grunted and punched in his order.
“With extra sesame oil, please.”
-
By the time Seungcheol reached your branch in Gangnam, curls of broth followed around him. The cold winter didn’t help, especially with the way his stomach was grumbling in this harsh wind. Seungcheol flashed his employee card, which honestly should’ve been an alarming notion to the receptionist on your floor. Why would an employee from the Yeouido Branch be at the Gangnam branch during work hours? But the receptionist knew you well, and by relation, knew Seungcheol well, who flashed an extra cheesy smile at Dahyun, who rolled her eyes in amusement.
He left the insulated bag with warm noodles at your desk, fretting with its position on your table for a few minutes before ultimately scratching off the price of the food. He’d never do that to you. And he meant it, almost thirty minutes later, when he immediately sent you your money back. (He was genuinely surprised at how well you were able to estimate the price. A close 28,600 Won, for anyone wondering.) He felt terrible for lying to you about his own lunch, but he didn’t want you to feel guilty for his own impulsive decision.
As he spent the rest of his self-proclaimed break in his car with a simple cheese kimbap, he hoped that you were genuinely enjoying your meal heartily.
-
“Seungcheol, hey! I’m really sorry for not clearing stuff with you about the folder. I feel bad that I wasted your time, and also hers. I know she didn’t get to have lunch, and I’m sure the commute also sucked ass for you,” Wonwoo’s muffled voice came from his phone that evening.
“Oh, Wonwoo, don’t worry about it! It was also wrong of me to still go even though she clearly mentioned going. It was rash of me as well.” He’d said after a while, humor in his voice about the whole thing as he recounted the events internally.
“It was rather rash, I’m not gonna lie, especially for you Coups,” Wonwoo whispered, “but you’ve always been like that when it involves her,” He teased.
Seungcheol’s hands stopped stirring the pot as he listened to Wonwoo’s joking words seriously.
Seungcheol settled for a “Yeah, you’re right.”
Carrots and mushrooms 🥕 🍄🟫
Seungcheol had an amazing day. One of the best weekends he’d had in a while. He’d gathered with some of the guys and had a great game of foot volleyball on Saturday, following it up by sleeping in on Sunday, which he hadn’t done since that time he’d caught a cold. Lunch had been a casual affair, boiling water for a boring flavor of cup noodles. His eyes were swollen, and he was slightly hungover, but even the boring broth of the cup noodles enticed his taste buds, especially with that dull thrum behind his eyes.
When he’d woken up at 11, he’d texted you for maybe a quick lunch, but you’d refused, citing some work plans which left him dejected, which he openly expressed with a big thumbs down emoji. It would’ve been funny if it weren’t for the next 12 thumbs down emojis that followed, consecutively. No worries, though. He’d surprise you some other day and let you cool down on your own for the next 12 hours before Monday. Dreaded Monday, where the often sleeveless hoodie-wearing Seungcheol donned monotone, corporate wear, and his often crass language was replaced with finance jargon that nobody cared for.
He planned to rest until the evening, but a sudden alarm at 4pm awoke him from his Netflix binge.
Crap.
Crap indeed, because the rate at which Seungcheol wore a clean pantsuit set and the closest tie must’ve been a new record. By 4:22pm, he’d been out of his door, and by 4:48pm, he reached the wedding venue with 12 minutes to spare. Talk about being on a time crunch!
Seungcheol greeted the groom and his family at the entrance, along with the bride’s family, and an old coworker at his previous company. He’d entered the hall, passing off the wedding gift in a grey envelope before walking over to his assigned table, where Joshua had already been seated. A side hug and a quick toast later, Joshua and Seungcheol cheered the newlyweds on.
“Dude, what time will you arrive on Thursday?” Joshua had asked once the conversation had dulled.
“For Seungkwan and Eunha’s match? Probably 5, after work.” He had concluded.
“Dude, Eunha’s injured. Our dear Gangnam branch head took over Eunha. I would think she would’ve told you earlier with how much she’s awaiting her victory,” Joshua had laughed, but Seungcheol didn’t feel like laughing. He knew you kicked butt at badminton. He also knew that you and Seungkwan played in high school. Seungcheol also knew you’d have to leave work early on Thursday for it. He didn’t know that you were going to be joining as a player until today. He processed his emotions, his head suddenly empty despite the commotion of wedding festivities around him. It wasn’t the fact that he wasn’t informed (that was a lie, he was dying and had flowers blooming out of his lungs, hanahaki style) but the fact that he knew for a fact that you’d been busy. With more collaborations between the Yeouido branch and Gangnam branch, he knew you’d been swamped. Seungcheol himself was drained, which was why he took the initiative to enjoy his weekends to the fullest. Hearing that you added more responsibility to your own plate caused him to unknowingly shiver.
“Oh yeah, she’s probably still stuck in practice. But she said she’d finish up by six.”
Before leaving the hall, he couldn't help but take a picture of the sky.
-
Seungcheol stopped by a nearby grocery store before letting himself into your home. His shoes were neatly arranged, and he had removed his coat in frustration, leaving it on your couch. But he only felt guilty and solemnly moved it to your coat rack along with his tie.
Seungcheol breathed in and exhaled. He didn't know why he was feeling so exasperated about this whole situation. You were a grown adult who could make choices, such as the way you handled your time, your work, and most importantly, your friendships and relationships. The last time he'd been this frustrated with you was in college, when you'd applied for a TA's position while being sick and juggling a part-time job at the convenience store. He'd only been forgiven for blasting you out in your private DMs after he bought you ice cream for two days, consecutively, at the convenience store you worked at. (You folded rather quickly, looking back. But this was Choi Seunghceol we were talking about.)
The first thing he noticed when you walked in was the slight limp. He was humming a random melody and saw you in your badminton kit. It had been a while since he last saw you in sportswear, but you looked flushed. You didn't look surprised, and he wanted to smile at you when you smacked him, but he held back, still pretending to hold up the upset facade.
The mushrooms were sizzling in the pan, and the strong scent of sesame oil was sizzling into the tiles of the room. He knew you were watching from behind, and he finally broke the silence.
"Carrot and mushroom stir-fry," Seungcheol pouted, upset and hiding his slight frown from you. He thought you had nodded until he heard the doors to your bedroom close, with muffled water streams following afterwards.
Seungcheol dutifully continued to prepare the rest of the meal. He heard you setting up the table. In his head, he couldn't help but internally squeal at how domestic this all was. He shifted his eyes to the sight of his coat and tie next to your badminton bag on the coat rack and couldn't help but think of what it would feel like if this were the norm. His heart began to race, but he broke out of his trance when some oil from the pan popped and sizzled onto his hand that was stirring the contents.
-
It didn't feel like an argument when Seungcheol began to express his doubts, frustrations, and worry about you, at first initially. But things change when emotions get involved, and he knew he struck a nerve when he mentioned questioning your actions. He knew he crossed a line somewhere there and almost retracted, if it weren't for the way you brushed off the conversation and tried to divert it into your casual banter.
“Why are you even here? to lecture me?” You had said, mimicking a child's voice to the best of your abilities.
Seungcheol didn't accept the olive branch immediately. He ignored the way you looked at him as he piled food into your own bowl, when he mentioned what had truly, honestly hurt him. he was shocked that he actually mentioned it to you, when he'd been denying it to himself all night.
"Josh told me you said yes to Seungkwan today, and that your practice would finish up by six. And also that you’ve been preparing for a week already. Just knew you’d be too tired to cook,”
He felt a bit embarrassed. It wasn't like you guys were dating or married and you'd have to inform him of every life choice you'd make, especially those that had no concern for him. Maybe it hurt that perhaps even after all this time, you might still consider him just a friend tagging along for the ride, not as a genuine companion, be it platonically or romantically.
He brushed all his thoughts aside as he started washing the dishes. He enjoyed the feeling of you dragging his folder sleeves, begging him to give you your sponge and dishwashing liquid, and he had only pouted and told you to go rest, sternly. He had also watched you waddle onto your couch, as he cleaned up the kitchen and table from the neat mess he made, before finally settling down on the couch next to you, comfortably wordless.
He'd left late that night, but not before giving you a long hug and exhaling a brief apology into your hair.
-
seungkwan boo
you: seungkwan where r u?
you: hello r u ok???
you: shes alone and ur Match is in like 7 mins wtf
you: vro
seungkwan boo: bathroom not too good rn
seungkwan boo: I don't wanna leave it like this but i can't play rn
you: can I borrow ur extra jersey
Seungcheol snagged his shirt off in front of everyone. He didn't care that girls and guys from the neighbourhood were ogling at his figure, not when his eyes could only focus on the way you seemed to walk towards the court, your shoulders slumped. He shrugged on Seungkwan's Jersey, ignoring the way his biceps were restricted, and exchanged his shoes with Mingyu's. He also welcomed himself to your spare racket (the crazy expensive one, of course).
A lot of people didn't know that the only reason he wasn't a badminton player was that he was only a slightly better football player, and boy, did he play football. He squared himself and jogged onto the court, catching up behind you.
When Seungcheol joined you on court, he couldn't help but feel his pulse jump, enjoying the relief in your eyes. He got into position. His phone buzzed as he signed his name on the referee's sheet. It went ignored.
-
new!
seungkwan boo: im otw onto court, I'm okay now!
-
The only thing Seunghceol could think of was you shaking him with a force unprecedented. He could only smile, gummy and eyes crinkled in joy as you took this surprising victory alongside him.
He could only relish in the hug you gave him, hearing the hoots from the court-side, after he felt the racket fall from his palm.
Outside was a different story. He felt shy, as if he was stuck with his crush against his will (Half-true, Seungcheol would say). Seungcheol saw the silver medal sparkle against your chest, and he was proud. incredibly. He had wanted to say so much, but it seemed that all you left him nowadays was speechless.
“I’m sorry,” you had started, “I know you were only worried that night, and I kinda just brushed you off. Have been brushing you off for a while now. I’m sorry you also found out from Joshua. Didn’t think it was that important.”
Your apology left him a bit surprised, but he covered it up with a response of his own, thanks to his quick thinking. he had genuinely apologised for his actions, hating the way the two of you had only shared brief conversations over the course of four days.
“Just, care for yourself more.” He added, thoughtfully, “I’m also sorry. You just came back from a tiring day, and I questioned you like a crazy boyfriend in your own home.” He stepped closer, and with it came the two of you sharing a bubble of breath. He could taste the salt in the air, the humidity in the air, and most importantly, the brief tension that had arisen from his bold move.
He then further made another bold move by comparing himself to a crazy boyfriend, which somehow broke the tension, yet made it stronger. Average Choi Seungcheol moment (you would've said, if it weren't for your own tongue being rendered useless).
Eventually, the moment eased down, and all he could feel was how carefree he felt when you were around. His whole body felt weightless, and in this moment, he felt as if he were the luckiest man alive to share such intricate, minuscule moments in your presence.
He had said something to break the silence and had thought back to various moments of his own sports achievements, with you by his side through most of them, of course.
A moment flashed behind his eyes as he remembered a random football game against some random elementary kids, where he'd shot an almost deflated football into the makeshift goal, but not before screaming out your full name and professing it was all for you.
Another time, when he'd been running a potato sack race, and he fell on his face, getting scratches along his cheekbones and lips, a fiery urge to win because his competition included a pretty-boy junior (poor Chan), you tutored in your free time.
And the latest one, where he remembered looking at your face as it crumpled in euphoria from this joint win. If only he were stronger, he would've confessed brightly into your ears about how much he adored you.
Looking at you, his determination to transition further from friends ignited a tiny bit more.
“You’re Choi Seungcheol, our batch’s crazy, competitive, corporate boy.” You chuckled at him.
He was crazy, competitive, was in love with you, worked in corporate, and did he mention, in love with you?
Soup and rice 🥣
Seungcheol had a terrible day if he was going to speak from the heart. He tried to find some silver lining along the course of the day, but all he could think about was how a new intern spilled their 'matcha of the day' onto his favorite shirt, which you had gotten him. It was a hot day, and the only way he could cover it up was by wearing his stupid coat. The same intern then, somehow cc'd a spam email to almost everyone in the building, which left Seunghcheol's monitor gone for a good thirty minutes, leaving him to read and reply to meetings on his phone. And most importantly, his car was left at the mechanic overnight due to some overheating. He got home by walking. He was going insane in this overworked summer heat.
But at least, if he was having a bad day, he knew someone who was probably having a worse one: you (affectionately, of course)! Because reaching home at ten, an empty stomach after a long day, to see your building's elevator wonky, would mostly ruin his day. At least Seungcheol lived on the third floor. You lived on the seventh, typical city girl.
bane of existence 🥰
bane of existence 🥰: just got off of work and u won’t believe my frickin chungus life rn
you: wtf it’s like 10 y did u just finish work
you: what happened
bane of existence 🥰: long story BUT my apartment elevator is BROCKEN
you: 😂😂😂😂😂😂
bane of existence 🥰: u have NOTHINF to be laughing about . Now im about to be tired AND hungry 😂💔😂💔😂
bane of existence: at least no work tmr 😎
It had only taken those messages for his hunger to erupt in his stomach. It was late, and he took a taxi to the closest convenience store near your apartment building.
He would cook you a meal, but he was exhausted. And, he was sure you'd understand! Which was why his basket contained Triangular Kimbaps, electrolytes, Probiotic yoghurts, Convenient Lunch boxes, and four ice creams, all of the same flavour that you'd been picking since your immature days in high school.
As he made the trek to your apartment unit, he couldn't help but feel his breath huff between his throat. It was uncomfortable, but knowing you, you would immediately sleep the hunger off, all in the day's exhaustion. He started climbing up the stairs faster, ignoring your old flip-flops outside of a random sixth-floor unit.
When he finally beeped in your apartment code, he was surprised at the silence. No shoes, no work bag, Heck, even your car keys weren't in their usual spot. He made the brave decision to stock up the food in your fridge, and finally walked into your bedroom, seeing the door open.
It was an invasion, but he pressed his ear in the direction of your bathroom, not hearing your shower. The room, however, had fresh notes of fragrance. He finally put down his thinking brain and gave you a quick call.
“I’m in your house, where are you?” his voice let out, worried and anxious.
“Why are you — actually, forget that, you being here is perfect. Come down to unit 603, I need your help with something.”
-
He was put to work almost immediately. It was a good way to unwind, and surprisingly, he didn't mind it. He sewed eyes into teddies, diligently, and politely swooned at Granny Han. Granny Han also smiled at the young man's antics while you looked on endearingly. Eventually, Seungcheol's eyes began to wander.
“What is your Portable Air conditioner doing here?” Seungcheol had asked with the sewing needle between his teeth, “How are you going to sleep tonight?”
When he heard that you'd been sleeping in the living room for a few days, he almost flew out of his metaphorical chair (since the two of you were comfortably lounging on the floor)
“I’d been missing my alarm for work. Sleeping in the living room causes me to be uncomfortable enough to wake up straight away,” you had answered, unbothered.
Seungcheol couldn't believe it right now. His best friend was on the floor of her living room because she was missing her alarms. It couldn't help that you'd been doing overtime now, and that meant coming home late. He couldn't exactly imagine your state at your own abode, which was supposed to be a restful, safe space.
He had called you stupid (which you were honestly being), and before the conversation could escalate, Granny Han bought steaming bowls of food. He was exceptionally grateful, since he had built up an appetite on the way to your place.
-
It was twelve forty-three when Seungcheol had opened the door for the two of you. You had messily left your slippers next to the door, which he fixed for you, before scolding you gently.
“Go to your room,” He had said, putting on his most intimidating voice.
“Cheol, just go back home.” You groaned (lovingly).
“I’m crashing over tonight, and I WILL be taking your couch. You have no choice but to sleep in your own room.”
Now this was untrue. Despite the long years spent together, the two of you never stayed over. It was an unspoken boundary which rooted from the time he'd gotten drunk at college for the first time and woke up, hungover, on your bed, with you on the floor. He'd been ghastly and quite literally ignored you for two weeks afterwards.
Seungcheol remembered that morning vividly. It was a Sunday, of course. You were drooling, and he couldn't help but swipe at it with his thumb. The sight of you waking up was making his heart race. He knew he had a tiny, stupid crush on you, but he was in college now! It was time to date around, get his heart broken once or twice, and that would be enough for him to remember that you guys were always just friends. He didn't realise that his lips frowned at the thought. His thumb almost made contact with your eyelids before he retracted when he realised what he was truly doing, and more importantly, where he was. He made eye contact with you and then-
“Let’s just hang out for a bit before I crash for the night,” you offer, ignoring his blatant lie.
Seungcheol had already grabbed the ice creams and handed them to you. The two of you are already fitting each other on the floor.
“Aw, is that why you came over tonight?” You teased.
“That — and a few other things.”
In all honesty, Seungcheol had thought up a storm. He'd confess to you over dinner, then, depending on the situation, he'd offer you cream or the two of you would share a cone (or two). He'd smile to himself, and you'd steal some from him.
Which wasn't that far from reality, minus the confession, of course. That would come later. Seungcheol purposefully left his ice cream hanging near you, allowing you to take sneaky bites, then playfully berating you. He couldn't help but laugh aloud, watching you try to take bites of his ice cream while he watched on. The stupidity of the ice creams being the same flavour, the fact that it was one, and that automatically made everything funnier. Seungcheol was having a blast, laughing along to your smile and even your smacks. Even when you slapped your palm over his mouth to shut him up, and he'd gotten nervously silent. He still laughed.
His terrible day ended perfectly.
Pasta 🍝
Seungcheol was excited to visit Inje. He'd passed through the area, and from what he remembered, it was only a small county. With an elderly population, he knew there were vast farmlands and summer rays all around. When the group chat was deciding roles, he was planning to sign up as a designated driver, but he hesitated when he saw your name already signed up.
bane of existence 🥰
you: I saw that you were gonna drive
bane of existence 🥰: yess cheol I'm so excited were gonna have a BLAST. bonfire and marshmallows and allat
you: heheh me tooooo
you: wanna split the driving tho? I can drive on the way back
bane of existence 🥰: ohoh sure sure
you: so ill be w u in ur car, both ways
bane of existence 🥰: u want me sooo bad
you are typing...
Seungcheol was having cold feet. Not mentally, but physically. His feet were cold, and despite being in the peak of summer, his feet couldn't help but clamber up. It also was maybe because he was sitting next to you. He was acting all pouty, slightly angsty about having to wake up early, but it all disappeared when he looked to his left and saw you smiling to yourself.
“When did you even have the time to make this?” Seungcheol chomped down on the baguette, “When did you even sleep?” He uttered under his breath, slightly envious at how perfect the sandwich had tasted (or maybe it had been his hunger speaking)
“Firstly, my precious Minghao, my precious Seungcheol,” Hearing such a random endearment, Seungcheol couldn't help but gulp down and look out the window, amused, “Chew before you speak. I can’t perform heimlich while driving,” you had paused, “I woke up at five, and slept early last night. Maybe ten?”
Seungcheol couldn't help but feed you, realising how small you felt in the car, hat on your head, ready for the holidays together. He didn't retract his fingers when he brushed against your cheek. You didn't mention anything either, mouth focused on chewing, eyes focused on the road, and ears focused on turning red. Seungcheol pretended not to notice.
-
Seungcheol noticed the way you rested after driving, which was rare. He never really got to see you rest nowadays. Back when life was simpler, He'd remember grabbing ice cream with you almost every day after class, and eating lunch rowdily in the canteen with you, Jeonghan, and Joshua. Simpler, golden days.
He grabbed your things and tried making it easier for you, if only you would let him. The others saw the way you were restless, trying to help around, passing on water to everyone. he ven almost caught trying to remark Seungkwan's car, which he thankfully stopped by doing it himself. He purposefully flexed his arm while doing it, not that he'd admit it to anyone.
Seungcheol also settled into his tent, which was a bit further away from yours. Jeonghan had already put his stuff down, and he changed out his now sweaty shirt for a new, crispy T-shirt.
It was tiring, of course. He was happy, though, to be around his friends, all sweaty and tired. It would be bad to be tired alone, but there was a sort of fruitful happiness that came with being tired and exhausted together.
Seungcheol helped with Lunch. He helped hand in hand with the grilling of meat and passed meat off to everyone as they lined up. He watched as you passed the meat off and scarfed on your meal, mouth burning and all. If only you could slow down a bit so that maybe the two of you could eat together. But it was okay, you deserved to have a good meal after working so hard. He smiled to himself as he watched you scarf down your meal, a smile nobody really saw. When you came to place your bowl down, he tried ladling more soup into your bowl. The gall of you to give him tongue! He, of course, gave you a rivaling silly face in response.
He watched as you detoured towards the sink and started washing your dishes. Sure, nobody signed up for it, and not that anybody really enjoyed it, but he hoped that you might just give him some company as he finally sat down to eat. You started scrubbing at the bowls and chopsticks instead. You became Chan's, Chan's became Wonwoo's, and eventually, you ended up just washing almost all the dishes. He watched on. He knew you were smiling while doing them, but the ease with which you took up the responsibility unnerved him a bit. A lot, actually.
-
After Lunch, everybody went off to do their own thing. Jeonghan and Seungcheol went to play Foot Volleyball with Mingyu and Seungkwan while you lounged around with the others, catching up and discussing about nothing and everything.
By the time evening came around, you guys realised that it was going ot be a hard night without fans inside, and bugs, seeing how dark it was becoming.
Seungcheol took the opportunity to rent the items from the front desk, worrying about the rest. It was getting dark, and as much as he was tired, he didn't want anybody else to make the long trek away from the campsite to the entrance.
Jihoon and Hansol walked slightly ahead of him, carrying some of the other items. The heat patches in Seunghcheol's packet seemed to weigh down on him. He'd picked them on impulse, getting reminded of your hunched posture and the way you seemed to stretch earlier today.
"Dude, Seungcheol," Jihoon had broken the silence.
"Yeah?" Seungcheol had replied, not really paying attention.
"Are you okay?" Jihoon asked.
Seungchoel could say yes, but he felt as if that were a lie to himself. He was doing well. His workload had decreased after the collaboration between his department's work was finished. He'd been consistent at the gym, He'd been eating good food, he'd been seeing his friends enough, and he'd called home almost every few days. Yet somehow, he wasn't fully satisfied with the way things were. Jihoon didn't need to hear all the tumultuous thoughts in his head.
"I guess." He replied after a while.
"If this is about her," Hansol turned back to look at Seungcheol, "I think it wouldn't hurt to be honest with her."
Seungcheol looked forward, seeing Jihoon and Hansol looking at him already. He smiled and nodded, thankful for their words.
-
Seungcheol stopped in his tracks when he first saw you hacking away at the wood in the corner. Everybody else asides from Joshua, was at the circle, enjoying their conversations, cracking open beers and sodas, but you weren't in the circle. No, you were at the darkening corner, laughing away, using a small axe to cut away at some logs. You were unbelievable.
He couldn't help himself from walking ahead, shoving in front of Hnsol and Jihoon, who couldn't help looking at one another, worried about where this situation was going to go.
It went quite terribly.
“Why can’t you just sit down for a while?”
“Oh, you’re back, it’s nothing, I just wanted to have a try, and Josh let me.”
“We were just finishing up as-”
He didn't wanna hear it, at this moment especially. He was tired of seeing you run around all day. You seem to always be working, especially if he is around. Was it him? Was he the problem? Was there something about him that caused you to just go scatter around and do any task in your near vicinity that would cause you to ignore him? Or was it the need to have things done your way? Was it a control problem? Why did you always have to be involved, never catching a break, always there? Why couldn't you take a rest and let him take care of you for once?
He couldn't hold back his tar-like, sticky, ugly feelings from erupting from his mouth, without a single thought of how it would feel to hear them.
“Yeah, I can see that, but don’t you get tired after doing shit all day? You’ve been up since five and drove us idiots around, then you washed everyone’s fucking dishes. Now you can’t sit still for a few hours and have to cut down some stupid logs. I can’t understand you sometimes. Almost 15 years of friendship, and I can’t seem to understand if you’re just a fucking control freak who has to do everyone’s job, or if you just need to have things done your way. If you didn’t know, this is also your day off.”
The silence was uncomfortable and haunting. In your long years of friendship, Seungcheol had never spoken to you in such a way. Immediately, he wanted to retract and explain, apologise, or even add on. Joshua held on to his arm, trying to hold him back, but also to console him. It didn't really work.
“Is that what you really think of me? A control freak?”
No, never, I'm Sorry.
“You must think I’m insane if I’m just going to listen to you say all this bullshit. I don’t know if this is your misplaced anger for some other stuff, but I really don’t understand what crawled up your ass. I don’t know if you’ve been listening to me, Seungcheol, but I CHOSE to drive. I chose to wash the dishes, and if you listened to me just earlier, I was the one who asked Joshua to let me try. I understand you want me to rest, but I can’t help it if this is how I do it. Gosh, you can be so fucking annoying.”
Seungcheol was left standing alone as he watched you storm away. He felt like something in him was eroding.
-
Jeonghan gave him an earful afterwards. But not before Hyeri almost grabbed his ears, drunk and angered. Thank you to Jihyo for redirecting her away.
"I don't interfere in your relationship with her 'cus I know it's a sensitive topic between the two of you, but you've fucked up bad."
"I know."
"I mean, why the fuck would you say that to hear? I was all the way at the other side, and I heard the bullshit you were spewing. Ok, I get it, you love her to bits, and you got annoyed with her doing everything for everyone, but why didn't you talk with her, calmly, like any mature person would?"
"I know."
"You'd better get your act together and apologise properly."
"I know."
Sleep didn't come easily to either of you that night.
-
Seungcheol didn't know if he wanted to thank Minghao or strangle him.
You had taken him to a restaurant in the city. Seungcheol was ignoring the vibrations of his phone, settling into the seat as you two settled into a quaint restaurant. In a way, it was funny. The two of you were dressed in summery shirts, t-shirts with trees and flowers, wearing shorts in the heat. The two of you looked like tourists in your own city.
Seungcheol had ordered an orange soda, and you had followed with the same. You had ordered a Carbonara, and Seungcheol also ordered the same.
"Do you think we'll be okay, Cheol?" You'd asked innocently.
"I think we will," Seungcheol replied.
"I'm sorry we haven't hung out much. I know I declined on you a lot, and when we did have a meal the last two times, we were kind of tense. I'm sorry we haven't been able to hang out much. I would be annoyed too."
Seungcheol had nodded then and thought about his next words, carefully.
"I think I wasn't annoyed at you. I was a bit, but also at myself. I kept on thinking, how can I help you out, but I never really talked to you much about it anyway. I never told you about how I felt about your workload that much anyway."
Your eyes were doe-like, listening earnestly. You felt a bit weightless, if you were being honest.
"I kept trying to be by your side, but I think maybe I wasn't doing that well of a job-"
"No, Cheol never," You reassured him.
"Isn't it funny that I was the one who fucked up last night, and here you are trying to comfort me?" He mused, honestly.
You looked away, biting your lip.
"I know that, you have your shit together. You're one of the most capable people I know. I'm amazed by how ambitious you are. I like how you live your life. You have worked so hard for everything that's in front of you right now. But there's still a part of me that wants you to need my presence, even if I'm just there. Actually, cut that, I wanna be strong for you. I know you don't exactly need it. But I just want to be yours. In any way, you'll have me."
The carbonara was steaming in front of you. Your eyes were glossy as you listened to his earnest confession.
Seungcheol's legs couldn't stop shaking. He had finally said what he'd been holding back for years. He wasn't planning for this at all. In his grand scheme of life plans, he had imagined confessing his dying love for you at the Eiffel Tower, making cryptic posts on Twitter, before hard launching you to the friend group, before they'd all laugh along and say"finally!"
"Seungcheol I-"
"We can talk about this later. Please, Eat. you didn't have dinner."
"And regarding what I just said. You can answer me later. Or never even, if you'd like us to forget about it. You can think about it at your own pace."
You had smiled at him and nodded.
He looked a bit dejected.
You stole some of his spaghetti while he was distracted anyways.
Sunny Side Up 🍳 (The last one!)
Seungcheol woke up on the floor of your apartment, head heavy. bicep heavy, too. Your head rested on his bicep, and he couldn't help but coo internally at the sight of your lips slightly parted and air escaping in quiet puffs. This was the second time he’d woken up beside you, and unlike his University self, he didn’t run away this time. Instead, he watched you as you woke up. He closed his eyes, worried this small sense of peace and happiness would go away too fast.
He thought back to the night before.
-
Clang,
Clang!
“That’s enough for tonight, guys,” Seungcheol said, victorious and giddy from all the chatter.
-
"Guys. Don't mess around. usually she would offer her place as it's the closest, but she's very much drunk. Don't do stupid shit and get home safely." Seunghceol relayed to the group.
"Hosh, since you didn't drink, you can take care of Wonwoo, Jihoon, and Jun, should be okay, right?" Seungcheol planned out. You were very much passed out on his back, looking serene with your smudged mascara.
"Aye aye," Soonyoung saluted.
Seungcheol had delegated route plans to the sober members and tracked their locations as he walked you back to your place. It was a somber night. He thought back to your conversation with him at the pasta place, and your dynamic since.
Things had gotten better, he would like to admit. The two of you tried to spend time together, away from work, on weekends. You had declined brunch, but Seungcheol had felt even more excited when he realised it was because you were doing things for your own happiness. He was the happiest when you invited him to your place the next day to make strawberry shortcake with the strawberries you had brought back from Sokcho.
Sure, the two of you never brought up Seungcheol's love confession without the three words, but he could see a twinkle of admiration in your own eyes that mirrored his. Eh, but what would he know? He didn't mind as long as he was by your side and got to enjoy your presence without any sort of deadline or task on any of the two of your shoulders.
Your eyes had sleep all over them, and without any sort of disgust, Seungcheol wiped at them with his own thumb. You had been awake, but you couldn't walk away from this feeling of eternal warmth that was encompassing you.
"Cheol,"
He hummed, voice gruff from sleep.
"Breakfast,"
"Let's make it together."
You had nodded into his chest in reply. Somewhere in there, you felt his heart bump and beat faster, and louder in retort.
You cracked four eggs into the pan, letting the whites soak up the chill oil as a spicy scent filled the kitchen. Behind you, Seungcheol prepared rice with Seungkwan's Mother's marinated crabs. The scent of the marinade caused you to salivate from behind the pan.
At the dining table, you sat facing the balcony, while he sat in front of you, protecting you from the light behind him. It was the early morning, and yet he had this dreamy glow encompassing him.
He brushed his teeth in your bathroom, with you beside him. Looking back, you didn't realise how you never saw it with the two of you acting all domestic in front of everybody and yourselves, it was a cute sight, seeing you two act all lovey-dovey.
Chika
Chika
-
Seungcheol inhaled his food. You hadn't started yet, enjoying watching him as he stuffed his cheeks full of rice. Runny yolk ran between his bites, and yet he never made a mess on your table.
"Choi Seungcheol, I like you."
Your dining table had specks of rice and chilli oil on it. Seungcheol looked at you, wide-eyed.
"I've liked you for a while now, actually. Maybe I never told you because I thought I never deserved this type of love, or maybe I just preferred to keep it to myself because of our precious relationship as friends."
He listened, shell-shocked.
"I always shielded myself from things like comfort, and in a way, always thought I didn't really need it. But I was thinking about your words from August. I think in the way you always need to be around me, I think I'll always want you. You're a comfort to me. Someone who has always had my back, regarding even if it's stupid things like sewing up teddies, making me eat even if you're upset at me, drinking my shots for me, or even arguing with me over my well-being. In the same way you want me, I'll always want you. And I’m sorry if I never showed you that enough. I know it must’ve been hard, Cheol."
Seungcheol felt his eyes seering, and a second later, you disappeared and blurred from his vision. Tears blurred his sight, and you were by his side immediately. Your arms circled around him, and Seungcheol took in air, as if it were his first time ever opening his lungs into the world. His sobs racked your body. Seungcheol hadn't been expecting an answer. He was content with the days passing by regularly, and ignoring the lump in his heart and soul that screamed every time the two of you were together, if it meant comfort for you.
"I love you, always and forever," He had whispered into your hair, after a while. “I’m always gonna regret not loving you openly. Thank you for liking me. Thank you.”
Your thumbs wiped away his tears. His own came to cup your cheeks and swabbed your own tears away, too.
His forehead met yours, and he breathed a sigh of relief. He then pressed a kiss to your hairline.
You breathed in. He exhaled.
"May, I be, yours?"
"You've always been mine."
end ˎˊ˗
⇜ PREVIOUS | CURRENT | NEXT ⇝
hi guys! Firstly, I wanna thank each and every single one of you reading right now. Yes you! Thank you so much for your support. I always read fics but I wanted to try writing some of my own. I’m relatively new here, so I’m still getting the hang of reblogging culture, commenting and stuff like that :) I hope you guys can be patient with me in that regard. I was so shocked when I woke up to likes from you guys. In all honestly, I thought this would go silently unnoticed. Thank you for your love.
I wanted to dive more deeply into my characterisation of Seungcheol and the MC. if you're still here, thank you! in all honesty, I just wanted to write something but I didn't know what. I was just coming up with random scenarios. I wanted an mc that was helpful, but not exactly a doormat without boundaries. reading all your reblogs and comments were really the highlight of my day, in all honesty. Much love and thank you for the ride. I was thinking of making a bonus SMAU with twitter posts of their progressing friendship to Love story.
I hope you enjoyed reading. likes, reblogs and comments are always appreciated but never compulsory :3
