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softwaring

moon-covey

faebirdie

this is funnier the earlier in march you reblog it it

ari-shipping-stuff

✨ it’s march ✨

f-i-t-z-s-i-m-m-o-n-s-deactivat

😔 it’s march 😔

moommy-milkers

👉 it’s march 👈

multishipperpirateking

It’s March

tiktoksthataregood-ish

headspace-hotel

random thought:

I think "sex is just another activity you can do with a person" arose as a response to the conservative christian "sex is the most Sacred Important Thing Ever and you HAVE to do it Correctly and only Within Marriage or it's The Most Damaging Sinful Thing That Tarnishes You Eternally." Which definitely needed to be criticized.

however when I see it expressed as like "sex isn't a special activity or inherently different than other things" I think. Well it is though?

I mean that being allowed into the intimate boundaries of another person's body inherently has more responsibilities (making sure the other person feels safe, caring about their comfort and pleasure, communicating clearly) than like...going on a walk in the park with that person

Which really just more starkly highlights how twisted purity culture is? "Sex is an activity with special significance" should mean, "If you are being really intimate with someone and you don't care about their pleasure and wellbeing and listen to their wants and needs, you could really, REALLY hurt them," not "If you have sex with anyone except the single person you've gotten married to and are committed to for the rest of your life, gross fungus literally grows on your soul."

headspace-hotel

okay, follow-up to this post

you, personally, can feel that sex is a casual activity without any special significance. That's fine

However, a person's physical body is, I think, very, VERY different than their car, an hour of their time, or a book you borrow from them.

If you borrow someone's book and don't give it back, decide to hike the trail you want instead of the one your friend wanted to hike, or refuse to turn off the music in your car that your friend hates, you're a bit of an asshole but you are not a rapist.

There are degrees.

If you give someone food and lie about the ingredients to trick them into eating it, you're still not a rapist but you've done something horrible. If you know someone hates hugs and you hug them anyway, you're creepy and people should stay away from you, but it's still worse if you know someone doesn't want sex and you make them have sex anyway.

Consent should matter throughout life, but consent in regard to a person's body carries more weight than respecting their preferences about things external to them.

If we framed sexual consent as basically the same as respecting someone's choice about what movie they want to see or what store they want to go shopping at, that would be really bad.

Whenever I've brought this up, it seems like I get "well, you shouldn't coax your friends do other stuff they don't want to either!" which seems a little out of touch with reality, because there are occasions when people decide to be a good sport about something they don't enjoy for the sake of someone else, and if that thing is a bad romantic comedy movie, it's very different than if that thing is sex.

Now, can people with a healthy sense of their boundaries approach sex with the same framework? Sure, if they want to. Should this be the default approach to sex? HELL NO.

I think that healthily having a "casual" attitude toward sex where it is nothing "more" than just another activity requires a good sense of your own desires and boundaries and confidence in asserting them. "Sex is just another thing you can do with someone" is good for people who know themselves well enough to feel secure and confident making that call, but it sucks as a starting point for defining the significance of sex to humans.

Something that involves letting another person within the personal boundaries of your body doesn't have to have a "special" significance to it, but you have to undergo the process of figuring out what significance it has to you. Does that make any sense

headspace-hotel

This post has touched some nerves

y'all. I'm not trying to remove your agency in terms of what sex personally means to you or someone else (as purity culture does).

however if you see physically entering someone's body as no more likely to register as significant to someone else then walking 5 feet away from them, you're missing something that's pretty important to relationships with other humans

If you believe bodily autonomy is a right, you believe that a person's agency over their physical body is important in a different way than things external to them. IT IS NOT 'PURITY CULTURE' to say that 'what happens to a person's body is significant in a way other things aren't.' This applies to medical procedures and touch in all forms as much as it applies to sex

Like, forced pregnancy is not considered a form of torture because it's inconvenient, and sexual assault would not stop being traumatic if it wasn't culturally considered to be such

headspace-hotel

@houxli good take

I used to do martial arts, Krav Maga specifically (purple belt yay)

Krav Maga is about self-defense, meaning there was a lot of stress drilling and training that essentially simulated real dangerous situations

I got shoved, kicked, punched, yelled at, and choked by men that were easily twice my size, and...it was great fun! I consented. The people I was training with I knew were trustworthy people that wanted to help me learn, and I knew it was always an option to stop if I needed to. but even better, there was constant occasion to affirm that I was ready and okay before sparring etc. and if you didn't seem responsive or enthusiastic a black belt would probably pull you aside and ask you if you wanted to stop or take a break or if you needed water or a snack or something

some people were doing it for the workout, some people were having fun, some people wanted the black belt, some people were serious about having the ability to protect themselves if it ever became necessary

And none of those people were "wrong" about the importance it had to them...but it was STILL true of all of them that they needed attentive training partners who cared about their success to be safe and learn.

Someone who's experienced can do heavy sparring as a casual workout with a friend, but a white belt will EASILY wreck their own shit or someone else's

alexseanchai

[image: reply by houxli: "Nah, sex is cardio. It’s exercise, and like all exercise if you do it wrong you’ll hurt yourself and if you do it really wrong you’ll hurt others. Importantly, pick a sparring partner that you trust. When done right, the benefits are healthy."]

cosed

still the funniest fucking graph on earth

bard-irl

Nowhere near as funny as game of thrones episode ratings played on a piano

catchymemes

queercannibal

hannibal fans be like 'cannibalism is so romantic' bro go to therapy

darknovalatte

dykeseinfeld

literally i just can’t comprehend any interpretation of hamlet that doesn’t put grief at the center like. hamlet’s father died and he is actively grieving throughout the play that is the driver of all of his behavior. “is hamlet actually crazy or is he putting on a performance” is a boring question to me because grief is a type of insanity. grief makes you feel like you are performing even when you are all alone. it makes you feel like you’re seeing things it makes you feel completely alone it makes you cling to the people around you it makes you push them away it makes you angry and sad and hamlet wants to kill claudius for replacing his father and taking his mother from him as much as he wants to kill him for revenge.

sailorsally

saw first 7 episodes of sandman today. this is my takeaway so far.

cametotheshowinsd

coney island - Taylor Swift ft. The National ‘Cause we were like the mall before the Internet It was the one place to be The mischief, the gift wrapped suburban dreams Sorry for not winning you an arcade ring

pyrrhiccomedy

sometimes people try to persuade me that Batman could, would, or has ever had sex

pyrrhiccomedy

Batman doesn't fuck. he wouldn't know where to start. he might want to fuck Catwoman, but she confuses him. it's easier to be an aloof weirdo in a stupid costume than risk a moment of vulnerability with a woman who seems more than capable of laughing at his dick

pyrrhiccomedy

Yes obviously the Joker WANTS to fuck Batman, but Batman is incapable of even conceptualizing that. he'd have to distort his internal psychology like it's the fucking Lament Configuration to even imagine kissing the Joker with tongue. it would never happen

pyrrhiccomedy

if Bruce Wayne fucks, it's nothing but the rote execution of a piece of Kabuki theater. a sequence of choreography to struggle through on behalf of a greater performance. he disassociates the entire time and thinks about beating up crooks so he can finish

pyrrhiccomedy

"what about Superman" shut the fuck up. maybe Batman would consent to a soulless, jaw-clenched one night stand with Superman, but do you think Clark Kent would ever go for that? that good ol corn fed Kansas boy would reach for one single moment of emotional intimacy and Batman would be o u t

pyrrhiccomedy

Batman doesn't need sex he needs to be rehabilitated like one of those shivering, underweight shelter dogs that Sarah McLachlan is always trying to find a forever home

sensibleshroom

OP please explain how Damian was born. I'm not asking mockingly I genuinely want to know your thoughts on this.

pyrrhiccomedy

he was made from stolen DNA and grown in an artificial womb. that's not a joke that's his actual origin story

pyrrhiccomedy

"maybe he's aro/ace" this is hate speech. I would never disrespect aroace people by counting Batman among their number. aroace people are functional and content with their lack of sexual and romantic intimacy. Batman has never been functional or content about a single wrinkle of his psychology, and he copes with his Faulknerian inability to form healthy attachments by wearing little ears and beating the shit out of people. c'mon guys

obiwan

#Space Viking Himbo Thor Odinson:

perceabeth

shipping culture has actually made people insane. it's not all about characters kissing. individual arcs matter. growth matters. plot matters. pacing matters. antagonists matter. for five minutes close your bloody fanfiction tabs and read a book

ladywolvesbayne-deactivated2024

God FUCKING dammit, YES.

Two characters get along for 40 seconds and somebody is shipping them nuts wanting them to kiss and make babies, like, NOW. Dude, what happened to platonic relationships? Non-romantic love? Sisterhood, brotherhood? Strong friendships? Emotional support? Baby steps, even? And GOD FORBID if someone else tries to tell them they’re wrong...

Ship whatever you want, just don’t be an aggressive dick to others that don’t see eye to eye with you. For fucks sake.

she-is-amused

Friends are real things that people have, you poor love-starved lemons.

perkypotters

veryfunnymemes

beyblaiddyd

No offense but when are these takes trying to provide some “defense” for bullying because the objects of the bullying were “too weird” going to stop. Like people don’t usually develop these kinds of “strange” or anti-social behaviors in a vacuum anyways. I knew a girl in middle school who did the growling thing and she had been bullied since the 3rd grade, long before she got into anime. She did the growling thing because kids would physically harass her and teachers wouldn’t do anything about it, but they stopped when she started doing that. She told me it was easier to stomach getting made fun of for doing “weird” things/having “weird” interests than it was to have inherit facts about herself mocked.

Like I know some Anime Kids in school were invariably dicks but you still can’t ultimately use odd or “cringy” behavior to justify the cruel choices of other people to mock and torment others. So many of these kids have tons of trauma from being mocked just for having a particular interest or sense of style. Was a kid wearing a raccoon tail to school because they thought it was fun and cute really worth mocking them to the point of self-hatred? If kids were getting bullied to the point of tears in this year because they liked to do Fornite Dances in the lunchroom would you think it’s funny and that the kids deserve bullying for being weird?

And this shit was also just like an excuse to even more safely pick on people who were already on the ‘to-bully’ list. Think about how many people from this group were fat or not white or gay or neurodivergent and how that played into how they were ostracized in the first place. A lot of these kids would’ve gotten bullied even if they weren’t into anime/doing These Particular Weird Things because that’s what bullies do. That’s what bullies were doing before they “got into weird stuff” and it’s what they would’ve continued doing. Stop trying to make it a funny joke that people decided to traumatize their classmates because their classmates tried to commit the crime of having “abnormal” fun or having “abnormal” ways of dealing with harassment.

robb-greyjoy-deactivated2019082

“y’all got bullied for this other reason”

great, you still shouldn’t have bullied these kids. the magical mystical reason behind it doesn’t change the fact there was bullying.

also making peculiar noises, movements or over-imitating special niche interest behaviors are all characteristics that could be symptoms of neurodiversity.

“we didn’t bully jack for his weird interest, just because we’re ableist” is a more accurate picture, at this point.