"Danielle, I wanna go back to something that you said previously, that Kirs [Sparre]'s experience coaching the pros was really important last year; and you saw it paid dividends. But Francois does not have that pro experience. Why do you think he's equipped to fill that position given that he doesn't have that experience in that situation?
Old man 1: Do you really think Amy is manipulative?
Me: (Oh this sounds juicy. Who is Amy. What did Amy do.)
Old man 2: I don't know. I think Laurie is a liar though.
Me: (The plot thickens, keep talking boys)
Old man 1: I don't think Amy should have burned Jo's papers, but I don't blame her for marrying Laurie. I don't think she's a puppetmaster. Jo said no. How is Laurie a liar?
This is a common misconception because they’re such similar environments, but you should be aware that dads are native to Home Depot, while lesbians are actually native to Lowe’s. At this point, however, both dads and lesbians have made themselves at home in both Home Depot and Lowe’s to the point that trying to separate them back into their original ranges would probably do more harm than good to the delicate ecosystem of large chain hardware stores.
A properly raised and socialized Dad will be perfectly comfortable cohabiting with Lesbians. Its not really “encroaching on another’s territory”. You wouldn’t say that about foxes in a forest that also homes bobcats, would you? No. It’s just two different species that have both evolved to live in similar/the same environment. As long as they recognize each other as equals, Dads and Lesbians are more than capable of cohabitation.
Now, if you were to release a pack of Lumberjacks into a Lowes or Home Depot, that’s where chaos will reign. Being adapted to a far harsher and more demanding environment, the Lumberjacks would simply push Dads and Lesbians both out and also consume far more than a sustainable amount of resources. It would be like releasing bears at a country club.
As a former timber-harvester… I feel this is potentially accurate in theory. But highly improbable in actuality.
Lumberjacks, like most megafauna species generally require more space than the average hardware store, even a big box store could provide. The misconception is that Lumberjacks are a social species because of how they often work and live together.
This is a matter of necessity, not preference, and a survival technique for thriving under the LogBoss.
A “pack” of Lumberjacks, if not under the environmental pressure of a LogBoss will naturally disperse until they each have a wide territory.
Lumberjacks rarely fight for territory.
One on one, a Lumberjack could drive out a Dad or Lesbian, however the latter tend to travel in social packs.
Lumberjacks will passively retreat on the presence of large numbers of people. Kind of like Sasquatch.
Getting a “pack” of Lumberjacks assembled would be hard enough unless they were forced into a Hardware Store by a LogBoss. In that case, they would already be in a heightened and potentially agitated state far above their natural behavior. This artificial scenario can be likened to a circus animal running amok. If it had been in the wild, the incident would not have occurred.
Free-roaming Lumberjacks are the cryptids of the Hardware ecosystem. They are surprisingly quiet and unobtrusive.
Please stop labeling Lumberjacks as dangerous roving social predators. They are intermediate level omnivores and remarkably peaceful unless threatened.
question where does the “art student” or “DIYer” “crafter” or “soap maker” or “miniaturist“ etc. who has ventured into the store for supplies fall into the ecosystem/what is their impact of said ecosystem?
Most of the above are native to craft and hobby stores (art students, historically, are native to museums, but having been introduced to hobby stores, have found a niche for themselves and thrived), but all can be seen in hardware stores on occasion due to territorial overlap. They are generally low-impact, as they tend to stick to specific small areas and primarily utilize different resources. While a large group of any of them can be disruptive (art students, in particular, are known to travel in packs), in general, they are more likely to have territorial disputes with one another than with the local fauna.
A point of clarity -“crafter” is a bit misleading; while it conjures a specific image, much like ‘fish’ or ‘reptile’ it actually covers a broad array of wildly disparate species, and in general, more descriptive nomenclature is preferred. Fiber artists in particular are a genus to watch out for, particularly in groups. Beware a roving pack of domesticated quilters. They fear nothing, will go anywhere, and due to their social nature, will often seek interaction from other species that thrive best in solitude. They are quite friendly, and will happily adopt members of other species; the concern is that their adoptees do not always wish to be adopted.
I can say as a former craft store worker that if you wish to see true fear, look into the eyes of a Dad who must venture into a craft store. Despite the overlap of familiar beings known to him from his native hardware store habitat, Dads are instinctively aware that craft stores are not for them; they contain unfamiliar perils and even the seemingly familiar may have strange variances and unnerving secrets. (”Why is this airbrush so small? What do you mean nails, why would you… WUT!!”)
Only experienced silverbacks or the boldest young Dads dare venture into a craft store for long without his mate or offspring to keep roving Craft Ladies at bay and guide him in this strange ecosystem. If a Dad enters with his mate and is separated from her, he will often scuttle for the seeming familiarity of Woodcrafts, Models, or Paints (the latter not to be confused with Fine Arts, unquestioned territory of art students), but he eyes Scrapbooking and Jewelry with trepidation and will usually venture into those exotic areas only in the company of females of his pack.
Lumberjacks are rarely spotted entering craft stores of their own volition, for while they do not fear it as Dads do, they know it is an environment unsuited for megafauna such as themselves.
Hardware store Lesbians generally adapt more easily to craft stores, although they may enlist another Lesbian of a subspecies more adapted to that environment to guide them until they find their niche. Lesbians have even been known to seek the aid of a Craft Lady, a native fauna that share similarities with Lesbians but are usually smaller and nimbler to suit their chosen habitat. Dads who witness this are often awed by the Lesbians’ temerity, for although larger, Dads are generally wary of the cunning and dexterous Craft Ladies and may mistake their enthusiastic pack greetings as predatory swarming.
Craft Ladies, secure in their ecological niche, have no fear of interlopers and take the presence of non-native beings in stride, although they may become territorial about scarcer resources.
The only truly invasive species that threaten craft stores are Brides-to-Be, who are mere annoyances individually, but like locusts may descend in hordes and lay waste, leaving swathes of destruction in their wake. Fortunately for the Craft Ladies, Brides-to-Be are seasonal and usually only a threat in the spring and early summer.
Is anybody going to address the newly invasive species of BuJo enthusiasts into the craft store/art supply store environment? Why aren’t we talking about the dangerous proliferation of Leuchtturm 1917s and the growing threat of Dotted Moleskins? I had to liberate a Dad from a tangle of washi tape in the art supply store the other day and it wasn’t pretty.
The natural habitat of journalers was stationary stores, which have been replaced by office supplies stores, not the same. Journalers invade the craft stores and art supplies stores to get the markers and washi tape and Sakura pens they require for survival.
Another thing to note is all of those habitats must adapt to the seasonal migration of goths. As soon as the faintest hint of spooky can be detected at those stores, goths will arrive in packs. A small pack of goths determined to forage can strip the shelves of a seasonal section bare in 30 minutes.
I for one stand in fascinated trepidation to see how the major habitat destruction wrought by the loss of JoAnn Fabric will impact the greater ecosystem.
SCAdians can often be found in any of these environments, and while they do not necessarily travel in packs outside their native lekking grounds, they are gregarious and are not in fact one species but a colony of cordyceps-symbiotic Crafters, Goths, Dads, Lesbians, Cosplayers, etc. that are directed by the cordyceps inhabiting them to find others to pull into the “Society”. This particular symbiotic fungi, c. recreatoris, causes hosts to behave similarly to Historical Re-enactors, but SCAdians tend to create their own internally consistent timeline of events taking place in a shared world, whereas Re-enactors are a species of Museum animal.
I wish to address the percasive rumors directly: the loss of JoAnn’s happened prior to and was not in any way caused by the annual Goth feeding cycle. Notwithstanding that much like cicadas and locusts, the craft store ecosystem evolved to handle and even rely on this phenomen, it simply had no relation to this unfortunate occurrence. While there remains some debate on the subject, the immediate cause seems to have been a disease which hit the elderly crafters on whom JoAnn’s relied the hardest.
The loss of the JoAnn’s feeding grounds has been devastating to the Goth population, and conservation efforts are ongoing.
and you know what? Maybe I do tag my “blorbos” in a lot of random people’s unrelated posts but I’ve never tagged a man in a post about a woman. Which is why unlike a lot of other people I’m still going to heaven
The satirical Vesey Awards kind of shoehorned PWHL players into their categories, so I was inspired to create a completely PWHL-focused satire awards. Knock yourselves out and please do not submit more than one survey! Not exclusive to tumblr users, I just happen to be based on tumblr myself. Feel free to share the survey link amongst your PWHL friend groups.
https://forms.gle/xNaszWZXXBQoduN99
THIS SURVEY IS ONLY FOR THE 2025-26 REGULAR SEASON AND POST-SEASON (PLAYOFFS AND FINALS).
Voting closes on June 10, 2026 at 11:59pm EDT. Results will be announced shortly thereafter here on my blog.
Categories and respective nominees below the cut! Most categories also have write-ins.
Most Deserving City That Didn’t Get An Expansion Team
Exactly what it says. If only these cities had gotten an expansion team!
Calgary, Alberta
Denver, Colorado
Halifax, Nova Scotia
Quebec City, Quebec
Chicago, Illinois
Edmonton, Alberta
The Dearly Departed Award
Award for the most missed player that was traded this season or lost in the 2025 expansion draft.
Abby Roque (NY to MTL)
Sophie Jaques (MIN to VAN)
Zoe Boyd (OTT to BOS)
Denisa Křížová (MIN to NY)
The Royale Tiger Towel Paper Towel Power Play Power Through Tough Messes (existing to not existing)
Sarah Nurse (TOR to VAN)
Jessie Eldridge (NY to SEA to BOS)
The Jared Award for Excellence in Refereeing
For the official that made the most infuriating calls of the season.
Jared
Sydney
Jake
Central Situation Room
The "WTF" Coaching and Management Award
Award for the most interesting coaching and management decisions in the league.
Brian Idalski and the Vancouver Goldeneyes
Steve O'Rourke and the Seattle Torrent
Ken Klee and the Minnesota Frost
Troy Ryan and the Toronto Sceptres
Goalie Who Most Deserves A Gun
Which goaltender was forced to endure the most suffering because their team couldn't get it together this season?
Kayle Osborne
Gwyneth Philips
Corinne Schroeder
Aerin Frankel
Raygan Kirk
Emerance Maschmeyer
God's Most Suffering Player
For the player that endured the most suffering this season on this godforsaken bitch of an earth.
Laura Stacey
Gwyneth Philips
Hilary Knight
Alex Carpenter
Ad Break of the Year
Sorry to the Canadians who can't watch the streams on Youtube.
DVD Corner Bounce
Gay Time Check
Catch Me Catch Me
Jincy Roese Debut Single
The "Which Could Mean Nothing" Partnership Award
Awarded to the best duos and groups of friends in the league. Which could mean nothing.
Kenzie Lalonde and Cheryl Pounder
Laura Stacey, Marie-Philip Poulin, and Abby Roque
Emma Buckles and Catherine Dubois
The Entire Seattle Torrent
The Kristýna Kaltounková Most Overly-Penalized Player Award
Named in honor of Kristýna Kaltounková having the most ever penalty minutes for a rookie in her first PWHL season (45 PIM).
Rory Guilday
Kristýna Kaltounková
Abby Roque
Emma Maltais
Laura Stacey
Taylor Girard
The "Stop That, You Can Text Her After The Game" Award for Most Egregious Checking
For physicality that makes you go, "Why are you doing that???"
Jocelyne Larocque and Renata Fast WWE Super Slam
Brooke Bryant falling on top of Abbey Levy
Micah Zandee-Hart and Laura Stacey Skate Lace Entanglement
Jill Saulnier pushing down Ann-Renée Desbiens
The Prudential Center Clown Fan Clown Hockey Moment of the Year
For the most ridiculous moments on the ice, named in honor of the New York Sirens fan that dresses up like a clown, tumblr user @newyorksirens.
Danielle Serdachny sliding into an empty net, scoring a goal
Gwyneth Philips Beyblade
Emily Clark losing her skate blade and being pushed to the bench
Abby Roque scoring with her face
TD Place Arena Ice Hole
Ann-Renée Desbiens Ladder Assist
Lesbians' Choice Award
Who do the lesbians (and other queer PWHL fans) love the most?
Hilary Knight
Zoe Boyd
Laura Stacey
Carly "CJ" Jackson
Abby Roque
Kristýna Kaltounková
Fight of the Year
Kristýna Kaltounková vs. the entire Ottawa Charge
Abby Roque vs. Britta Curl playoff scrum
Montreal Victoire vs. New York Sirens line brawl (feat. Kayle Osborne)
Megan Keller vs. Laura Stacey
Boston Fleet vs. Toronto Sceptres line brawl (feat. Frankel & Tapani hug)
Jill Saulnier vs. Tereza Vanišová rematch
Quote of the Year
"I think I peed a little." - Marie-Philip Poulin
"How can you not be romantic about hockey?" - Eric Gallanty
There's this video of nuns talking about their favourite things to do outside of nun activities and one of them says "ultimate frisbee" and the other one goes "and sister you are so good at that." I literally cannot get "and sister you are so good at that" out of my head. Out of all my stims this one is my fav lolol
“I have always wanted to change the world through sports. Playing hockey empowered me and gave me an amazing platform to advocate for the issues that matter the most to me, especially gender equality and LGBTQ+ inclusion… Trans athletes deserve those same rights and equal opportunities in sports. I now mentor young athletes, inspiring them to find their voices through hockey. Every child, regardless of gender identity, should have the chance to access the lifelong skills that sports teach like confidence, perseverance and leadership.”
Meghan Duggan – Three-time Olympic medalist and IIHF Women’s World Champion, and now PWHL Hamilton GM.
We love to see it. 👏👏👏 Too many of the women who have reached elite levels in hockey are very quiet on this topic. Nice to see someone incoming who has spoken up.
amateur princess @cheapqueen17 - Tumblr Blog | Tumgag