Chronicles of Emotional Infidelity

short prose about questionable feelings

[vintage--lilacs]

this is the best thing I’ve ever seen

[isnt]

these shirts are everywhere… follow @isnt for more

[abd-illustrates]

pirates and cowboys are so good because its all about a few good fights and then endless travel across an unchanging environment. lots of opportunity for reflecting. vampires are pretty much the same except instead of unchanging environment, its eternal life.

you had me at “Good Fights” tbh

safe to say we all believe in the inherent homoeroticism of a well-excecuted duel

[nyctosaurid]

the thing all sherlock holmes adaptations get wrong is making the guy an irredeemable asshole who treats everyone like shit . not only is it not reflective of the original stories they miss that “nice, smart, well mannered dude who snorts coke when he needs to think” is possibly the funniest character ever devised 

[aerialsquid]

I feel like the modern equivalent is that guy you think is super well put together until you find out exactly how much red bull he ingests on a regular basis.

[domicileensnared]

Modern Sherlock is that very nice English Professor-seeming guy who you bring a problem and while walking from the door of his office to his desk he starts explaining the entire solution you need

And upon reaching his desk he’s like “Excuse me one moment.” and pulls out one of those huge Monster canisters they legally aren’t allowed to make anymore, cracks the whole thing, chugs it, takes a deep breath, and then nods at you and is like “Alright, and then what you need to do is…”

[younggayanddoingokay]

Imagine how much better the dynamic of bbc sherlock could have been if they did this.

[kaylapocalypse-deactivated20201]

why even modernize it to energy drinks??? coke didn’t go anywhere. we still have coke. energy drinks aren’t NEARLY chaotic enough. 

Its is more like you hiring some guy to do private investigation about how your husband maybe cheating on you and Sherlock comes to your house high as fuck. Walks into your living room and without taking a moment to even talk to you or sign any paperwork, he turns around—pupils as big as god—and just says

“Its your best friend Brenda. I’ll email you the invoice.” 

and walks right out of your house. 

[bairnsidhe]

Because when it was written cocaine was legal and even considered healthy and useful by some laypeople, even though doctors knew it wasn’t, and Watson was always trying to stop people from encouraging Sherlock’s addiction because HE KNEW BETTER.

So consider this, Holmes, at 2am, desperately searching the flat for the stashes of NOS cans, only to keep coming up with passive aggressive pamphlets about the dangers of caffeine overdose.

Watson wakes up to a stench like Satan’s ass to find Sherlock sitting by his bed with a re-heated pot of cold brewed Deathwish Coffee that had been hidden in the back of the toilet tank (brewing) for five months.  Sherlock is trying to say he’s proud of John’s cleverness in finding most of the stashes, but he’s passed into the fifth dimension and all John gets is a creepy vibrating grin and a sound like a shaken cat.

TLDR, Sherlock did die when he fell off the Falls, but he was so coked up his body didn’t stop moving until like a decade later.

[shadowmaat]

Sherlock as one of those cryptid types the baristas talk about (there’s a post floating around somewhere) who comes in and orders a venti with as many shots as they are legally allowed to add, plus a few more for good measure (and a hefty tip) and then adds energy drink on top of it before chugging the whole thing, to the absolute horror of the cafe staff.

[junietwohundred]

This is the kind of Sherlock Holmes discourse I demand on my dash. Bring me more!

[snartha]

hufflepuff more like hufflePREP amirite

[hogwartsconsultingtimelady]

If you know what this is referencing you deserve a senior discount

[otahkoapisiakii]

!!!IMPORTANT FOR BLACK US VOTERS!!!

I saw this on Facebook and went to check my registration status, sure it was fine because I voted recently, but I put in the info and it said I’m not registered

PLEASE, especially if you’re a Black voter, check your registration status at vote.org

[elyseeeeew-deactivated20250306]

Know your status

[mistressvioleta]

Does your last name sound anything like Lopez, Martinez, or Rodriguez? Mine does. When I saw this post I checked my voter registration status online with my state. Despite registering just three months ago, I was no longer registered to vote, and I did not receive my ballot. If you live in a mail-in voting state and you didn’t get your ballot, contact your county election official/county clerk for a replacement.

[symphonyofmars]

Make sure you check with your state’s voting site as well. I just had the shit scared out of me because that website said I was registered, but when I checked my state’s site (and made sure I had the right county selected) it said I was registered.

It’s worth checking your state’s site every few months anyway (especially when any election is coming up).

[explorerrowan]

Texas is definitely purging voters. They’re also making it harder to re-register if they purged you. I hate that this is true, but POC will need to check and check frequently to stay registered in Texas.

College students, too. In the 2014 election, I had to vote in San Marcos, and I can’t tell you how many Texas State students were turned away because they didn’t cross all the t’s and dot all the i’s on getting their registration transferred and current.

[fuckyeahtx]

IMPORTANT Y’ALL.

[yeahiwasintheshit]

Republicans are openly saying they are trying to restrict voting, and you can be damn sure the people they want to suppress are poc. So make sure you and you’re family are registered, esp if you live in a red state with republican controlled state houses.

[wilwheaton]

Reblog this over and over again, until everyone who has been suppressed by the GOP sees it.

[hapalopus]

This is my favorite genre of Cats comments

[whitepeopletwitter]

[booklovertwilight]

[publicschoolstories]

this cardboard mr. krabs was found by its lonesome in the dumpster of my school and i shit myself every time i think about it

[totallynotagentphilcoulson]

[chroniclesofemotionalinfidelity]

Is it possible to be someone-else-beside-your-husband's-touch-starved?

[chroniclesofemotionalinfidelity]

When you're about to see someone for whom you have forbidden feelings, you over-calculate every move.

You play 3D chess with yourself trying to come up with plausible deniability

for why you're taking so long in the bathroom (I was cleaning it),

why you took off your mom-cardigan and put on a flattering fitted hoodie that still fits you from high school (I was too cold),

why you took off your socks to bare your delicate small pale feet (I was too warm)

(wait)

(you can't be both too warm and too cold)

(shit)

(putting the socks back on)

(no, take them off)

(then put on slippers)

(which are actually pretty cute)

(I'm cold and the slippers are warmer than the socks?)

(yeah)

(that'll work)