A. Burr @cinnamon-roll-aaron-burr - Tumblr Blog

kingjaffejoffer

[Scene: a nervous-looking older man meets with a millennial in a darkened alley.]

Millennial: what's the target?

Man: I don't know if I want to do this.

Millennial: people don't come to us until they've made up their minds.

Man: Alright. Styrofoam cups.

Millennial: Six months and they're gone.

Man: Can millennials really kill styrofoam cups?

Millennial: we can kill anything, but not cheaply.

Man: I can pay. I work for a plasti-

Millennial: I don't need to know and frankly I don't care. One of us will deliver a routing number to a Zurich account. Two billion euros, then we start.

Man: Al..alright.

Millennial: It will be your last chance to reconsider. Once the money is processed you'll have no contact with us again.

Man: I understand. It has to be done.

Millennial: then it's sealed. The cups will join chain restaurants and diamonds in the void.

Man: Thank..thank you.

Millennial: We don't require thanks. Participation is its own trophy.

clockedtomb

pipistrellus

i like in hamilton how they tell us that the islanders all chipped in to make sure that hamilton could go to the mainland and Make Something Of Himself like HE IS TOO TALENTED TO REMAIN HERE

but then much later its like… “he used to give 6 hour long speeches” and ur like… ok… sure. “would you like to donate to a good cause ma’am” “what cause” “sending alexander hamilton to another continent” “heres my life savings”

jessicaillinoischicago

#buy my silence for $8000 a month

ecc-poetry

Revenge

Since you mention it, I think I will start that race war. I could’ve swung either way? But now I’m definitely spending the next 4 years converting your daughters to lesbianism; I’m gonna eat all your guns. Swallow them lock stock and barrel and spit bullet casings onto the dinner table; I’ll give birth to an army of mixed-race babies. With fathers from every continent and genders to outnumber the stars, my legion of hapa babies will be intersectional as fuck and your swastikas will not be enough to save you, because real talk, you didn’t stop the future from coming. You just delayed our coronation. We have the same deviant haircuts we had yesterday; we are still getting gay-married like nobody’s business because it’s still nobody’s business; there’s a Muslim kid in Kansas who has already written the schematic for the robot that will steal your job in manufacturing, and that robot? Will also be gay, so get used to it: we didn’t manifest the mountain by speaking its name, the buildings here are not on your side just because you make them spray-painted accomplices. These walls do not have genders and they all think you suck. Even the earth found common ground with us in the way you bootstrap across us both, oh yeah: there will be signs, and rainbow-colored drum circles, and folks arguing ideology until even I want to punch them but I won’t, because they’re my family, in that blood-of-the-covenant sense. If you’ve never loved someone like that you cannot outwaltz us, we have all the good dancers anyway. I’ll confess I don’t know if I’m alive right now; I haven’t heard my heart beat in days, I keep holding my breath for the moment the plane goes down and I have to save enough oxygen to get my friends through. But I finally found the argument against suicide and it’s us. We’re the effigies that haunt America’s nights harder the longer they spend burning us, we are scaring the shit out of people by spreading, by refusing to die: what are we but a fire? We know everything we do is so the kids after us will be able to follow something towards safety; what can I call us but lighthouse, of course I’m terrified. Of course I’m a shroud. And of course it’s not fair but rest assured, anxious America, you brought your fists to a glitter fight. This is a taco truck rally and all you have is cole slaw. You cannot deport our minds; we won’t hold funerals for our potential. We have always been what makes America great.

-e.c.c.

the-kangaroos-nest

argumate

wait what

the flag pin

the fake jaunty stride

has- has Jeb been home since the last debate

or does he wander the streets alone, smiling at voters and shaking hands with his shaking hands

commentyourcode

if you see him in the street

walking by himself

talking to himself have pity

he is working through the unimaginable

his hair has gone gray

he passes every day

they say he walks the length of the city

can you imagine?

republican party: dear mister zodiac, your fellow serial killers would like to know how you'll be voting

ted cruz: it's quiet uptown

the-other-fifty-one

kotaku

The End, by Alister Lockhart.

walkinchicken

Bruh, if you don’t think that having historically significant events well documented from multiple perspectives is a good thing, then idk what the hell u doin.

purplebloodedmajesty

Besides, like, that is literally a Giant Monster Rampaging Through The Town. What the fuck is the everyday person gonna do other than Tweet/Instagram/Post about it going “It’s the apocalypse you guys! Eyyyy lmao #apocalypse #deathrising #nofilter”?

nbkatara

#like come on your cellphone may not defeat the beast#but it can gain you like 50000 followers before the skies start raining blood so#who’s the REAL winner here? (via @purplebloodedmajesty)

songofsunset

And heck, even if your own death is inevitable getting information out could help save other people, even if it can’t save you. ‘Here are 20 livestreams of the giant tentacle monster including how it moves and attacks, how can we beat it?’ is way more useful than ‘an entire city got wiped off the map and things smell vaguely of calimari idk man’

steppsful

reblogging for this perfection: ‘an entire city got wiped off the map and things smell vaguely of calimari idk man’

safetytank

Point #1 on this here article talks about Robert Landsburg, a photographer who realized he wouldn’t survive the eruption of Mt St. Helens (too close to outrun the ash cloud) and used his own body to shield & preserve the photos and recordings he’d been taking during the explosion

these surviving photographs are still CRAZY VALUABLE to this day for the rest of the volcanologist community, since actual recordings of an in-process eruption are so dang rare

on-site documentation of any major disaster is gonna be VITALLY IMPORTANT to the people who are tryna figure out how to prevent that shit

tl;dr have your phone out, make your death-by-kaiju worthwhile to the scientific community

evennstars

mallius

not throwing away my shot!

If you feel like you need to criticize Hamilton for being in a format that's inherently limited to privileged people given its subject matter but you didn't have the exact same opinion of Les Mis you need to shut your mouth and examine why you're uncomfortable with it JUST THIS TIME.

#tw racism