Civilized Things

Advanced Civilization. Do not attempt this at home.

[str-ngeloop]

everything you see on tumblr is biased towards the perspectives of the types of people who post a lot on tumblr. this is essential to remember

[last-picture-show]

Pierre Jahan, Workers at The Louvre, Paris, 1947

[389]

[ilsalvagocce]

selvatici tentennanti

_

@ioenina

[currentlycryingaboutlancelot]

today I learned that in 2008, the city council of florence overturned dante’s sentence of execution if he returned from exile. yes, dante’s inferno dante, who died in 1321.

but the funniest part of this is not that they were debating the exile of a man who has been dead for over 500 years.

the funniest part is that the vote was 19-5. five people voted to uphold dante’s exile.

[stabethadeathwhisper]

The objectively funniest part of this is actually that the city that holds his remains, Ravenna, refused to give his remains back. This was a ploy from florence to have his remains moved back for the tourist money and its been ongoing for a long time. Florence had a fake tomb built in the city to trick people into visiting, and have tried to force the return of the remains.

His actual caretakers have been very steadfast in keeping them hidden, moved, or generally out of reach to respect his choice in life to never, ever, ever return to florence, even when he was first offered the chance to return. This is at this point an almost millenium long feud that florence is really, really mad about losing

[mysteryteacup]

so basically the five people who wanted to uphold his exile were in the right

[odin-seeker-of-knowledge]

You're completely skipping over how funny this actually was. So Florence was actually using Catholic law to try and get Dante back, cause technically you're supposed to be buried at the church you were baptised in. So when a Medici, the ruling family of Florence, became pope Leo X he ordered Dante's bones to be returned. He slso ordered Michelangelo to build a mausoleum.

Anyway Ravenna couldn't refuse the pope and handed Dante's casket over to Florence. Another part of Catholic law is that opening someone's casket is desecration and a one way ticket straight to hell. So Florence was skeptical that Ravenna send them Dante and decided to do the unthinkable and opened his casket. It was empty, but Florence couldn't say so because if they called out Ravenna they'd have to admit to desecrating the corpse of their so called beloved poet. So they just pretended it didn't happen till Dante's bones were found behind a wall a couple hundred years later and again interned in a crypt in Ravenna.

Also a friend of Dante had his original grave in Ravenna inscribed with the text:

parvi Florentia mater amoris

Translation:

Florence, mother of little love

[hartsnkises]

Alan Turing and Ada of Lovelace did not invent computer science for the girls and the gays to claim they can't do math

[thedoubteriswise]

not many fictional narrators have made me feel like I'm stuck in an endless conversation with a stranger who's having a manic episode quite as much as ishmael does. really every page is like wow that's. that's great man I'm-- yeah no I see you've read a lot about whales-- oh wow. yeah that's. you know I'm not sure any of your coworkers act the way they do because of their race, I mean I haven't met them, that's just-- uh huh-- oh that's. uh huh. and queequeg is your husband? that's nice. oh. not like... he's not your husband? you're married but he's... okay. look man I kind of have to go but-- polar bears are scary, yes. uh huh. becau-- because they're white? I mean, I think they're scary because they're huge and known to hunt humans when they get a chance, I don't think white animals are like, universally scary. I'm-- oh. haha yes that's. that's a funny pun. yeah. yeah no I got it. right haha yes no I understood you don't have to explain-- no really I did understand the joke it was funny I promise-- yes I know you think whales are cool

[enlitment]

spill for me, Muse, the wine-dark tea on a problematic man

[frankenmouse]

It is so ridiculously easy to gain a reputation for being competent by just reading signs.

This is not metaphorical. I mean actual, literal pieces of paper/plastic/metal/whatever explicitly erected to inform the public.

“How did you know this was the right trail?” I read the sign.

“Wow, how did you know what that flower is?” There’s a SIGN.

“How did you know we needed to use the side door?” THERE IS A SIGN POSTED ON THE FRONT DOOR.

Just…why are we having such different experiences of the world? People can read. I KNOW they can read. There’s nothing wrong with their vision.

Just. READ. THE. GOD. DAMN. SIGN.

This also applies to:

Syllabi

Instructions

[glorianas]

I only know, there will never be another Valentino! There will never be one even remotely like him. He was a god. 

VALENTINO (1977)

[foxglovedforest]

[kurhanchyk]

"historians will call them friends" buddy you're looking at this because of historians

[kurhanchyk]

"do your own research" good luck with paleographic analysis of the sources then

[swarnpert]

unwritten by natasha bedingfield is how allergy medicine is supposed to make you feel

[romanceyourdemons]

when the blackberry bushes have thorns to discourage mammals from monopolizing the consumption of their fruits and encourage birds to spread their seeds but they don’t know that the mammal in question is ME #notdiscouraged

[romanceyourdemons]

#ow

[romanceyourdemons]

#stuck

[sleepnoises]

just saw a post saying fabric in clothes is bad now because manufacturers want to sabotage your right to repair. Nottttttt what right to repair means. Post is from the timeline where you need special shapes of needles and password-locked thread to mend things

[stydixa]

MARILYN MONROE AS POLA DEBEVOISE HOW TO MARRY A MILLIONAIRE (1953) Dir. Jean Negulesco

[mitchipedia]