Clockwork Layton

Actor by day, reblogger by night. Please let me know if you want anything tagged ^-^

[clockworklayton]

Do you have a pet? If yes, you can help me!

It's my brother Joel's 21st birthday this weekend (25th August) and he likes animals, so I would like to surprise him with birthday wishes from a bunch of random internet pets!

If you'd like to help, please send a photo of your pet(s) (you can be in it too if you like) with some sort of birthday message in the picture (it can just be "happy birthday" whatever you want) to my messages or reblog this post with the picture!

For more info on my brother, he really likes programming (just got a new job as a programmer!) and gaming (Overwatch- Zenyatta main, Skyrim, Pokémon)

I don't mind about photo quality, detail, whether I know you or anything, I just want a nice and fun surprise so he can celebrate his birthday with lots of people animals from around the world :D

[evolution-incarnate]

shork time

shork 

[thornyrosewithoutthet]

@setheverman

[setheverman]

mood

[therealjacksepticeye]

This picture is just the reverse of this…

[setheverman]

jack…

[altonin-deactivated20180325]

my wedding dj: the groom and groom will now have their first interpretive dance to under construction from the sims 1 soundtrack

[caffeinatedginge]

(but in case you forget the beauty of this soundtrack here it is for your listening pleasure)

[targuzzler-deactivated20180224]

what if mayonnaise came in cans

[smeasel]

that would suck because you can’t microwave metal…

[oatsie-deactivated20180119]

good morning to everyone except these two people

[imsoofuckingsad-deactivated2018]

30 day free trial of being ok

[milkchocolateowl]

op wheres the link

[milkchocolateowl]

wheres the link op

[stimman3000]

https://instagram.com/p/BjNePqtgSFS/

[biff-donderglutes]

FUCK OFF IT’S JUST WOODWORKING AT THIS POINT

[zevbutt]

Catch me lounging in my boudoir in a flowey lace dress eating my fucking gramophone

[pancakeke]

this covers the hole but it’s really obstructive and ruins the aesthetic of the bowl I’m considering making a decoy bowl now

[introvertsguild]

All cats ruin the aesthetics if it doesn’t revolve around them.

[pancakeke]

related: aesthetic cat bed that has only been used 2 times in the past 2 years. they prefer to sleep in Amazon boxes

[the-cadence-of-yellow]

@pancakeke you should put the amazon box inside the aesthetic cat bed. Maybe they’ll be more inclined to use it that way

[pancakeke]

if this works I will lose my damn mind

[pancakeke]

ARE YOU KIDDING ME

[dungeonbbq]

everyone please look at these low quality photos of my cat

[guilty-as-battery-charged-deact]

Do you think the monsters from Monsters Inc have had to start using internet memes to make kids laugh

[nannycanes]

Sully: Here comes dat boi! Mike: -comes in on a unicycle- oh shoot whaddup

[guilty-as-battery-charged-deact]

Mike: *from behind door* Some

Mike: *bursts through door* BODY ONCE TOLD ME 

[broodingsoul]

This is my favorite type of postmodernism

[nexya]

I love how humans have literally not changed throughout history like the graffiti from Pompeii has people from hundreds of years ago writing stuff like “Marcus is gay” “I fucked a girl here” “Julius your mum wishes she was with me” and leonardo da vinci’s assistants drew dicks in their notebooks just for the banter and mozart created a piece called “kiss my ass” so when people wish for ‘today’s generation’ to be like ‘how people used to’ then we’re already there buddy we’ve always been

[charlesoberonn]

The Hagia Sophia has inscriptions that were considered sacred for centuries until they were deciphered in the 70s to be Nordic runes saying “Halfdan wrote this”

[terminallydepraved]

my old english prof told us that theres a cave in Scandinavia where a viking gratified some runes like 14 feet up on the wall and when they finally reached it all it translated into was “this is very high”

[loremerchant]

Ancient Shitposting

Now on the History Channel

[self-critical-automaton]

‘People have literally just always been people’ is genuinely my favorite fact about the world

[skaletal-deactivated20190721]

“Times are bad. Children no longer obey their parents, and everyone is writing a book.” - Marcus Tullius Cicero, 106 BC - 43 BC

[tastefullyoffensive]

“Not use collective punishment as it is not fair on the many people who did nothing and under the 1949 Geneva Conventions it is a war crime.”

[nu11-pointer]

Wait it’s a fucking WAR CRIME?!?! I mean that might not be 100% accurate but now I gotta know

[tlitookilakin]

holy crap, collective punishment is a war crime.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fourth_Geneva_Convention#Collective_punishments

and according to the exact legal phrasing-

No protected person may be punished for an offense he or she has not personally committed. Collective penalties and likewise all measures of intimidation or of terrorism are prohibited.

This technically counts, as students are civilians, and thus considered a “protected person”. So yes, collective classroom punishment breaks the fourth Geneva Convention, and she should be rewarded for standing up for human rights and doing her research.

[squided]

Power-move: accuse your teacher of a war crime using knowledge they supplied you with

[politicalsci]

a reminder:

[crescentmoondemon]

So I did an egg hunt at my place of work this morning. I don’t mean like I hid a couple dozen eggs and people rolled their eyes like “hey isn’t this a bit childish?”

I mean I got an entire staff of some 30 surgery, kennel, vet techs and receptionists to go absolutely wild running around our facility looking for 200+ colorful plastic eggs full of chocolate and sour patch bunnies and one golden egg with $10 in it

Like one person riding on another person’s shoulders to look on top of the high stacked kennels and using leashes as lassos

There was screaming and wild giggling and I’ve never seen so many grown ass women grinning and running around like kids in my life it was the greatest.

Apparently I am now the morale officer of my workplace but my boss (who somehow wound up covered in glitter at the end of the day despite literally none of the eggs having glitter on them) now knows me as

The Harbinger of Chaos

[iopele]

that sounds FANTASTIC

[damnedifyoudeeohh-deactivated20]

yeah, chaotic good

[orlandobloomers]

STEP 1) GET THAT $$ STEP 2) SPEND THAT $$  STEP 3) OWN 2 MUCH STUFF STEP 4) PUT IT IN A PILE STEP 5) RELAX

[wolfman-murphy]

r u a dragon?

[orlandobloomers]

STEP 6) DRAGON

[boopernatural]

STOP USING FAT PEOPLE AS A REASON TO BE “DISGUSTED” WITH AMERICA

[tiredassperra-deactivated201704]

literally we have imperialism, state-sponosred genocide,  white supremacy, violent transmisogyny/homophobia and a crumbling education system that’s failing our children lmao take your pick

[wyrmwizard]

sea anemone designed to sting, ensnare, and digest unsuspecting fish: *exists*

clownfish: