look, i get it. you think it's rude because if a kid asked you the same question, you'd feel insulted. i mean, look at you! what do they mean they can't tell? you're performing girl adequately and there's no reason to imply otherwise other than rudeness!
that emotional reaction you're imagining that would make you feel insulted? that's dysphoria.
do you think those of us who present more androgynously don't know what we're doing? do you think someone who looks like i do is getting dressed in the morning going oh i'm such a pretty lady? no! please consider for a moment that we do this on purpose! that an are you a boy or a girl? from a kid means the exact opposite to us than it does to you! it means we knocked it out of the park that day!
freaking out like that deprives me of the chance to answer your kid's questions if he wants to ask instead of leaving his entire education in the matter up to whatever nonsense is in your head, and it deprives your kid of the chance to ask those questions and get real answers instead of whatever panicked bullshit you're about to teach him! furthermore! it shows him that this is not an okay subject to talk about, to be curious about! it teaches him that looking androgynous is inherently degrading, because why else would it be rude to ask?
i am in the children's section of the library with my own child, who is standing right in front of me and the same age as yours. believe it or not, i have straightforward, kid-friendly answers to the kinds of questions kids ask. for the most part, they're even the same answers i'd give most adults, because the concept is neither difficult nor inappropriate if you haven't already decided to be an asshole about it. it would have been much more comfortable, more educational, less of a whole thing, and overall better for everyone if you'd just let me give them.
kianamaiart
tangentwithtanner
annaxmalina
gummygunk
