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@computerqueen
QUEEN from DELTARUNE
* Choose The World... That Makes You Happy
Library computer in the Light World, ruler of the Cyber World in the Dark World
Single mom to a bouncing baby boy (not pictured)
Runs off neon green battery acid
Professional internet troll
System wallpapers from Windows XP's RTM, Build 2600; Microsoft Co., August 24, 2001.
Past self.
Damn it.
They peek out from around her, back down the hall they'd came from.
Damn it.
"HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO 'MAKE PEACE' WITHOUT GETTING MURDERED?"
Even ignoring the sheer improbability of being able to make peace with their history to begin with, their other half had proven quite volatile in the time they've been here.
"ELABORATE ON 'ACIDIC DETERRANT,' I'M RATHER SUSCEPTIBLE TO OXIDATION MYSELF"
This whole situation had them dizzy.
"HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO 'MAKE PEACE' WITHOUT GETTING MURDERED?"
* Great Question * I Made Peace With My Past Self A Few Months Back * But That Was Before All Non-Reconciled Duplicates Went Into What We Would Call... * "Murder Mode"
Elaborating on her "acidic deterrent," Queen holds up a glass bottle of battery acid. Unlike the cans they shared when they first met, this acid is bubbling violently, and a label on the bottle indicates it's "Extra Dangerous."
* I Can Generate A Protective Shield Of Acid * (To Avoid Oxidation, I Recommend Not Walking Into It) * If We Can Find Your Counterpart, It'll Be Easier To Negotiate With Them From Behind The Acid Wall
She looks around again, searching.
* Where Are They, Anyway?
@computerqueen <3’d
So far, the entire environment and the people in it was overwhelming jarring and unnatural to SpongeBob. These people were breathing AIR? And they all looked so strange! Even in his little underwater community, SpongeBob was a bit of an oddity - not a fish but not a surface dweller. But he still felt a sense of belonging there. Here? Not at all.
He was just peering around, still trying to get his bearings straight, when big blue eyes focused on some sort of computer lady who resembled Plankton’s wife! Not 1-to-1 exactly, no, but SpongeBob still felt the urge to investigate. So he came onto her, shoes squeaking until the sponge met her face to face, beaming up at her with a friendly smile.
“Hi there!” SpongeBob waved up to Queen, eagerness pouring from him, “You look really familiar to someone I sort of know. Well, we’re not exactly buddies but I know OF her….” his face morphed into a thinking expression, fingers tapping at his chin before he looked back up at Queen, the innocent smile re-emerging, “anywho, you look like her. Maybe you know her. You know anyone named Karen Plankton?”
Maybe the surface had a race of computer people?
Queen's simply relaxing on a lawn chair, sipping an acidic green drink as she types a work email on a holographic screen, when she hears the sound of squeaking getting louder and louder.
Lancer?
No, that would be splatting, not squeaking. Though they are both classic sound effects...
Perplexed, she minimizes her holo-screen and turns to face the source of the squeaking. A magnifying glass appears on her facial visor as she considers the sea sponge's query.
* Karen Plankton... * Yeah No Sorry Zero Results Came Up For That * Other Than A "Karen" Who Was Upset About A "Plankton" Exhibit At The Aquarium But I Have A Feeling That's Not Who You Mean
* Going Out On A Limb Here * But Are You * Perhaps... * A Kitchen Sponge From Kitchen World?
Not a Dark World that she knows to exist in any capacity, but it couldn't hurt to ask!
🌙 "Mhm! Iroha studied and worked for ten years to make this body for me!" Kaguya puffed out her chest with a great deal of pride. All of those sleepless nights and long study sessions had paid off, and she had been watching over her through all of them. "Someday she's even going to make me working tastebuds! But for now I can just use my avatar... because somehow I can taste things here using it for some reason." It must have been something weird about how the city treated digital beings.
Kaguya clapped at the reveal that Queen was indeed... a queen! "Does that mean I should call you Queen Queen then? Um... That's kinda redundant, so maybe not!" She called herself a "princess", but she really didn't do anything you'd expect a normal princess to do. If anything it was just boring work more akin to working a desk job... while dressed up!
"Uh... Yeah, I was really important! They did all sorts of things to get me back, so I guess you could say I was pretty beloved!" That wasn't a lie, nor was it the truth. "Actually, when I came to Earth it was Iroha who found me. I only became a streamer after I spent all her money so I could set things up!"
* What A Skilled Roboticist (Or Androidicist) * She Should Meet The Alphys Who Lives In This City * What She Lacks In Appreciation For The Second Mew Mew Series, She Makes Up For With Mechanical Knowledge * And I Don't Have Taste Buds For Lightner Food Either
Queen laughs a bit at her new title, "Queen Queen."
* Oh That's Funny I Wouldn't Mind That One Bit * FYI It Stands For "Serial Number Q5U4EX7YY2E9N" * But That Tends Not To Roll Off The Taste Bud-Having Tongue, So I Tend To Stick With Just "Queen" (Singular)
"Uh... Yeah, I was really important! They did all sorts of things to get me back, so I guess you could say I was pretty beloved!" [...] "Actually, when I came to Earth it was Iroha who found me. I only became a streamer after I spent all her money so I could set things up!"
* "They" Being The Lunarians Or Your Virtual Citizens? * And What Kind Of "Things" Did You Set Up? * I Happen To Work For A Talent Agency, Let Me Know If You'd Like To Stream With Us BTW
Its floor-ward gaze lifts only as she offers them another can, and somewhat surprisedly, they accept it. How generous she is with her drinks. They suppose they'll have to pay her back someday, with some other snacks? It's only fair for a fellow machine, it thinks.
They stare up at Queen for a long moment, then raise the can of battery acid for a moment when she speaks with a nod, before bringing it to their mouth as well. Yeah... sorrows are lighter when shared. It could get used to having someone to commiserate with.
"IF HE ISN'T 'SAFE AND SOUND' I WILL HAVE A LOT OF REVENGE TO TAKE."
If Maxwell had made good on his "joke" of Jimmy being kickable, well... It would have to make him miss the grating immortality of the throne.
A moment of quiet hangs in the air, before it turns its head to face her again.
"WHAT ARE THEY LIKE? THE PEOPLE YOU MISS?"
* Same * Lancer's Only Been My Son For Two Days Back Home * But If Anything Happened To Him, I Would Blow Up This Whole Server * He Is A Bouncing Blue Bundle Of Joy And A Delight To Tutor In The Art Of Queenery
* Other Than Him There Are My Old Employees * Tasque Manager And Her Tasques, And Swatch With His Swatchlings... * They Run The Cafe In Castle Town Now, That's Where We Were All Moved To
A pause, as she takes a sip of her drink.
* How About You, Anyone Else Besides Your Creation? * Like Those Minions You Mentioned Earlier?
Queen refrains from asking if they have robot faces, or if they're the yellow pill-shaped kind with overalls.
Intrigued, she said. Ikki wasn't sure if that was weird or not--taken by itself, it wasn't a weird thing to say. What was weird was that his boss had had the same look on his face, when interviewing Ikki.
What exactly was so intriguing, Ikki had to wonder? He was just some guy. Some dumb motherfucker with no real-world experience who needed a chance. And so far, both of these people--Dar and Queen--had given him one. It was far more than he expected. Maybe all his belligerent yammering actually was the right thing to do (and not just the desperation move).
Deal accepted, she said. Jackpot. Make that three jobs under his belt. Good. He needed them, not just to live, but in order to pay for classes both here at Spirale Prime, and at the dojang.
Yeah, it was a lot of hard work. Yeah, it was a lot of time. But Ikki didn't give a single fuck. He wasn't afraid of hard work. He wasn't afraid of pain. He wanted to learn. Needed to learn. He was so fucking tired of feeling--helpless. Like he didn't belong. Like an imposter.
"Thank you." His reply was about as brisk and flat as any other words he said--but sincere.
Wait. Was she serious? "Fights? In the classroom?"
"Lady, what kind of moron do I look like to you--? Actually--don't answer that." Queen definitely seemed more than sassy and blunt enough to give him an answer he wouldn't like. Maybe that wasn't the best rabbit hole to dive into. Especially since he was the one who put fighter on his student application. Damn. He really had been desperate, just throwing shit against the wall to see what would stick.
"I can only promise I won't start fights. If someone in the class starts shit, you got my word that I'll drag their asses outside."
"And record it for WorldStar."
Queen gives a thumbs up of approval.
* Baller * Just Don't Tell Anyone I Told You That, Please * In Fact, Ctrl+Z That Whole Line Of Discussion * Where Are We, Skullrender? LMAO
Apparently, Ikki isn't the only one unused to the academic field. Queen holds a fist to her mouth, says the word "Cough", and adjusts her (completely unnecessary) glasses.
* But Yeah I Think This Should Be A Smooth Term * Any Issues You Face, Just Report Them To Me * I'll Handle Them With Tact And Precision So You Can Focus On The Study Of Studying
"Eh, no. If I leave I won't wanna come back. Might as well stick with it until I'm done or get into a violent accident. Even if it would be really frickin' cool to fly around and scare people."
Uzi pictures it for a few moments, smiling to herself.
"Oh, uh, or use it for cool skiing tricks. You know, whichever."
She could be the Skifree yeti. Robo-God, that would be cool. But Uzi lets herself be lead to the next course without attacking anyone on the way, only to be metaphorically attacked by the sudden difficulty spike of slope level two. She's not even skiing on it, and it's already intimidating.
"Robo-Jesus," she mutters. "Did they skip a few levels in between? Don't they have, like, a tutorial or something? I mean, I usually skip those, but it'd be kinda nice right now."
Well, Queen can be her tutorial NPC for now. Uzi sighs and raises her hand, nodding. "Yes, please. I know it probably won't have a section about using telekinesis, but I'll make do."
A shout draws Uzi's attention, and she looks over at the hill to see someone zooming down the slope, shouting in what's either joy or abject fear. Whatever the case, that's what she wants to do, to speed down so fast people just kind of look at you and go "wow, what a cool and tall person with a hot boyfriend, I wish I were as talented as them."
"Don't put a Subway Surfer video next to it, though. It was really distracting last time. Cool, but distracting," says Uzi, waving her hand again. She lifts her feet, and the skis slide in under her boots, and the poles jump into her hands.
No way she's not using the Solver for this day out, but she should probably learn how to do it normally too, lest she end the day with a stomach full of snow and a bunch of wet clothes.
At the warning about not to put a Subway Surfer video next to her video tutorial, Queen simply shrugs.
* I Thought You'd Like Learning How To Run Through The Subway While Simultaneously Watching Anime Clips * But Okay * How About This?
Queen takes out her cell phone — amazingly, there's somehow reception out here in the Mistwood — types something in a search bar, and scrolls through the results until she finds something relevant.
"What up, Ski Freakz?! It's ya boy, Ski Freeman, who you know always shows off the wickedest tricks here at Twi-Tun! But today, we're gonna break it down all simple for you ski newbz out there, you know what I'm saying?"
The video goes on like this for a while, complete with an in-video sponsorship, but it does go over the fundamentals of skiing, albeit in an obnoxious SpiraleTuber way.
* Okay Uzi Did You Get All That? * I'm Ready To Board The Lift When You Are
If she had her throne like she did when they were making obstacle courses together, the two of them could ride in style! But as it stands now, it looks like they'll have to take the ski lift if Uzi wants to try Level 2.
"Uh, normally yes. Cleanup after playtime, work, just for upkeep. List goes on."
They grimace as the ghost comes in trying to ruin the little fun they could have. While they weren't necessarily super fond of chiptune music, they'd rather hear that over "spooky" music. The latter would remind them too much over the supposed scary adventure that was made solely for them. Truthfully, this whole place reminded them of the descriptions of that adventure from the others.
"Nah, F%$!# it. Keep the party going. We're the ones laboring here, after all."
They point at the wailing spirit.
"And you! Don't complain when we're not even your employees. Bet we're not even getting paid, are we?"
* Sounds Like A Busy Classroom * Lightners Have So Much To Learn From Us, Truly
(She's still assuming that Zooble is another Darkner like herself.)
"You're being paid... in expeEERRrrieEENNCe!" wails the insatiable spirit. "And if you don't finish in an hour's time, then you may find yourself confronted with a vision from your past... Ooooo..."
Queen seems unimpressed by this threat. She sticks a hand on her hip and looks down at the ghost. It's definitely not the one that she came here to visit, she's more than sure about that.
* Bro * Really? * You're Going To Have To Do Better Than Dig Up Old Data To Get Under Our Skin * I'll Compromise By Adding Spooky Scary Skeletons (Chiptune Remix) To My Playlist But That's About It * What Do You Think, Zoobs?
"Medicine and healthcare costs money. And such a combination I know, takes money to fix."
"So no. But I do know its effects."
"I wouldn't recommend it at all. In honesty its not that great, its more of a novelty drink then anything else."
Queen takes another sip of her drink, though she doesn't take her screen off the sharply dressed man, drinking him in the same way that she drinks from her glass of acid.
* You Look Like You're Made Of Money * (In A Figurative Sense I'm Not Saying You're Literally Made Of Cash) * How Do You Know That It's Not Worth Drinking If You Haven't Tried It Yet? * I Take It You're Not An Energy Drink And/Or Sour Candy Kind Of Man?
Jax's brow quirks as he starts to look through his phone contacts, and - huh, whadda ya know. There she is. Along with a lot of other people he didn't approve to be added to his phone. How annoying.
Did that mean people he didn't even know had his phone number? Ew. Time to eternally put this thing on silent. He does that real quick, adds a little 👑 next to her name to denote that this one doesn't completely suck, then looks back to Queen.
"Yeah, that's me. J-a-x. Unfortunately the X doesn't really give me any super form or anything. Probably for the best."
"That's gross, honestly. What if some creep starts texting you creep pics or something? And you don't even know who it is? I bet you probably have a sick laser beam to blow them up or something."
* I'm 75% Certain That JA-X Chases "Space Bounty Hunter" In The Netroid Games * In Which Case：Your Super Form Might Take The Form Of A Mutated Toad
* It'd Be Sick If I Had A Laser Beam Specifically For That Purpose (Blowing Up Creeps On The Internet) * Sadly My Destructive Power Has Diminished Since Arriving In This World * So We'll Have To Deal With Them The Old-School Way * I.E. The Block Button Or Blocking Them IRL
* On The Plus Side I Can Still Do This
Queen wiggles her fingers a little for effect, then conjures up a trio of holographic screens: one of Jax, one of herself, and one of Lancer.
She stands back a bit so they can both admire her work.
HUMOR WAS GENERALLY SUBJECTIVE, much like this case here. as such, he makes a mental note to look into whatever this is to see when he has the time. though when she leans over to look at his book, he offers her a glimpse of it easily, making sure she doesn't get wet herself in the process. ❝ Indeed. It is all inscribed on here with equations and calculations, ❞ he replies, pulling away eventually when she begins to talk about being here for other reasons.
a golden flower, she says... interesting. he can only wonder what the significance of this might be to her, especially with her being so readily available with the hologram of this particular flower.
❝ I presume you speak about the Garden of Ash. It's a curious place, mingling the native flowers of the island itself with those of our home world. ❞ he had been there a few times, though he cannot say for certain if he saw a golden flower as specific as this. ❝ Would you care for me to escort you to it? I've been in the bath long enough, so it would not impact my day. ❞
* That's The Old-Fashioned Way To Do It (I.E. Inscribe It On Tablets And Run The Numbers In Your Head) * Nowadays Most Lightners Would Use Computers (Like Me) But There Was A Time Where "Computer" Meant "One Who Computes" * Not Necessarily On Marble, But Still
* Wouldn't Mind Being Part Of An Escort Mission * Just Throw On Some Pants First, Doc
She gives him some space to do just that, then picks up where she left off.
* So * Have You Been To The Garden Before? * How Would You Rate It, On A Scale Of One To Ten Petals * And Do You Know About Golden Flowers, Or Was That Your First Time Seeing (A Hologram Of A Drawing Of) One?
🌙 "Parents? Eh...!? Do I really have parents? I wonder..." Kaguya crossed her arms while pondering. She didn't really have people she saw as a "mom" and "dad". Did Iroha's mom count now? Possibly, but that wasn't really what Queen was getting at! "It's more like that legend is an inaccurate retelling of me meeting my fiancée?" How that had somehow become an ancient legend of the past was convoluted at best. "Oh! She's in the city too if you ever meet her! Her name's Iroha! I love her a lot!"
She jumped at the chance to mention her partner. Literally, because she made an excited little hop. "Oh! This is just my Tsukuyomi avatar! I can lose the bunny ears, see!?" It took her a second to remove the contacts in her eyes, and her appearance changed to that of a normal looking human dressed in normal clothes. She looked essentially the same right down to her height, though slightly older.
"Iroha made this body for me! Isn't it convincingly human!?" Arms out to the side, Kaguya did a little twirl before returning to what Queen had said about herself. "Highly advanced, huh? I get it! I was roleplaying as one for a while, making people think I was a super advanced vtuber AI in charge of an entire digital world! Well... I guess I was the admin, so that part wasn't fake!"
* Yeah That's How It Goes In The Legend * Allegedly You Were Adopted By Bamboo Cutters * Then You Warded Off A Legion Of Would-Be Suitors Before Heading Back To The Moon
(Very different than what Kaguya told her, for sure!)
* Haven't Met Anyone Named "Iroha" Before But I Would Like To Meet Her Someday * She Must Be A Brilliant Inventor To Make A Whole Human Body For You
* And Not To Brag (I Said, Bragging) But I Was Also The Ruler Of A Cyber World Once * The Name "Queen" Isn't Just For Show
* There's So Much To Ruling That People Don't Appreciate * Like How To Balance The Line Between "Tyrant" And "Bestie" * How About You, How Did Your Virtual Reign Go? * Did You Meet Your Fiancée During Your VTuber Arc?
@computerqueen
"I admit, I am not well versed in what people who are inorganic like in their drinks. But alcohol isn't bad most of the time."
sips.
The bubbling green liquid in Queen's cocktail glass threatens to dissolve its very container, though that doesn't stop Queen from sipping it without any apparent harm.
* Oh I Agree * It's A Shame That My Battery Daiquiri Would Dissolve Your Internals In An Instant * Though I've Heard There's A Rough Equivalent Composed Of Energy Drinks And Sour Candies * Have You Tried It Yet? Yes/No
@computerqueen liked for an event starter!
"So what you're sayin' is.... my laptop's got like a cold?" Virus. She means a virus. And probably several at that.
"The last thing I remember lookin' up before it went all funky was 'cool toolbars very nice'. Just trying to make my computer look as cool as I am. And then it kinda all snowballed from there." Downloading sketchy antiviruses mainly.
"Give it to me straight, doc; is she gonna make it!?"
Being a professor, a single mother, and a part-time member of the campus's tech support group means that Queen has a lot on her plate. Right now, she has to help this poor student save her laptop from the brink of despair.
"Yeah It's An Advanced Form Of Cold Called A 'Virus,' And The Prescription Is (Naturally) Antivirus Software. Let Dr. Queen (Me) Diagnose Your Problem And See If She (Your Laptop) Can Make It Through"
She adjusts her sunglasses and gets to work, restarting the computer in Safe Mode. After a few minutes of typing, the virus is successfully removed, but the damage has already been done.
"Hmm... Looks Like I'll Have To Back Up To An Earlier Version Of Your System To Recover Your Files"
"You Didn't Have Any Papers Or Assignments Saved On Your Hard Drive, Did You?"
