Infomercial Quotes Starters
Feel free to change pronouns and such!
“Help, I’ve fallen and I can’t get up!”
“But wait, there’s more!”
“Now I’m going to put my foot underneath your heel.”
“This is why I have such a great job.”
“You’re going to LOVE this.”
“Now they can even share clothes!”
“Stumbling around in the dark is dangerous.”
“Don’t turn on the light and wake up the whole family!”
“It is so simple. I love it!”
“You stick ‘em in your ears–gross!”
“Or just keep it in your pocket.”
“Has this ever happened to you?”
“Bibs aren’t just for babies!”
“Without me, the puzzle is incomplete.”
“The happy hot dog man makes a happy imprint on your hot dog!”
“We all end up acting like kids at dinner.”
“You probably don’t have enough time to practice.”
“Finally, there’s a better way!”
“It’s embarrassing to have someone help you with your personal matters.”
“You just shake it back and forth!”
“In a matter of seconds, you feel it.”
“I’ve got the perfect gift.”
“And it smells bad, too!”
“Parts shift, they sag, they alter, they move around…”
“We’ve gotta start doing something to prepare.”
“No, he uses the entire tree!”
“THAT is a bear scratch! AAAAAAHHHHH!”
“I can get in shape just sitting around!”
“Tired of standing around?”
“Put one in your pocket!”
“This is a whole can of soda.”
“Just rub, peel, and scrub, all at the same time!”
“There’s a new girl in town that can’t keep a secret!”
“Don’t make me eat the broccoli.”
“Feel safe and warm in his embrace while comfortably resting your head on his chest.”
“I’m doing it! I’m digging it! I’m bringing it! And I’m loving it, baby!”
“But we’re saving that one for last.”
“Where do you snazzy nap?”
“But putting up decorations takes so much time.”
“Neighbors will be in awe.”
“One wrong step and you can end up on the floor!”
“Tired of lunging and plunging, only to get a face full of you-know-what?”
“So, I’m staying at a friend’s house, and I accidentally clogged the toilet.”
“Because it really works!”
“You’re about to be mesmerized.”
“I don’t know what it is, but it’s the coolest thing ever!”
“If I can do it with one finger, you can do it with your whole hand.”
