Craiggers LA Daily

A daily description of stuff that happens to yours truly while living life in LA. Let's just say it's an adventure so far...

[gameshow-confessions]

[craigladaily]

Love this show!

[craigladaily]

LA Day 185

I think the "Day 186" post might make a little bit more sense if I threw in this story as well:

After work, I relax on the comfy red seats in the middle of the store.  A girl with a laptop walks over, and takes a seat opposite from me.  I forget who initially says "hi", but we eventually strike up a small conversation.  I tell her a little bit about me, where I'm from originally, and what I want to do out here.  [Even throw out IC Match, Win What's in Craig Reid's Left Pocket, and LA Match into the conversation...]

She mentioned to me that she (along with a bunch of other people she knows) works on a webseries that updates on a weekly basis.  [She was actually in Starbucks to finish editing the episode that was going to go up the next day - Tuesday.]  I was interested in hearing about the series (Walking in Circles) she works on, and I found it comforting that I found it easy to talk to an attractive lady.  (My other friend Spencer later added that it looks like I'm building my confidence with the ladies...)

I honestly don't know what compelled me to do this, but I asked for Bri's number.  Indirectly, of course - The actual question was: "Do you text?"  And she just asked for my number, and sent me a message with her name, and one of those smiley face thingys.

About two hours later, I get a text message (from Bri) saying that I should stop texting her since her bf is the super jealous type....

And I think I've heard that line somewhere before...

[craigladaily]

LA Day 186

It's been a while, but basically things are still the same for me here in LA.

But over the past couple of days, I've been noticing that I'm having a hard time (again) dealing with my feelings.  Separating from Jackie back in February wasn't the easiest for me, but I continued to press on hoping to achieve my dreams of making it here in Los Angeles.  Six months later, and not much has changed - still working at Starbucks, living from paycheck to paycheck, parents slightly pissed that I'm not doing anything with my degree (or going back to school), and I'm still single.

The fact that I got mistaken for gay the past week doesn't help much either...

I spoke to my buddy Janice not too long ago, and she suggested that I might be missing Jackie because she was the last girl I was comfortable with.  She also suggested that I saw a lot of potential between the two of us, but the fact that we're not talking right now could mean that she's just not ready for that kind of relationship with me right now.  (Or did Lisa say this?  Everything just blends together at this point...)  Honestly, I haven't given myself much of a chance to get over her, since I still miss Jackie whenever I'm reminded of being with someone you're comfortable with.

Sure, I'm a good friend and all, but sometimes I feel like having that someone around that I truly and deeply care for.  And, of course, it would be nice to have those feelings reciprocated from the other person.  I don't think I've quite experienced that yet....  And I think that's making me feel lonely and empty inside.  It's a feeling that I don't like.  And I don't think any amount of game shows could fill that emptiness that I'm feeling...

[craigladaily]

LA Day 123

Living here in LA is sapping at my soul.  I'm not the happy guy I used to be.  I find myself more frustrated and miserable because I'm not doing what I came out here to do, and I'm just having a hard time struggling to stay afloat.

Though, somewhere between Day 120 and Day 123, I started thinking about the future of the industry that I'm trying to break into.  I remember that some more soap operas are getting cancelled and being replaced by reality programming.  Apparently, it's cheaper and it has a guaranteed following with a younger demographic.  So...game shows should fall under that category too, right?  [Probably not, since according to YouTube stats over the past week, the audience Win What's in Craig Reid's Left Pocket is about 40% 65+ years old...]

And then there's what I've been reading about production companies that produce video content for the web.  That's was got me thinking, "I want in too!"  It'll be a great way to spread my show to a wider audience, and a good way to break the market for web game shows.  Seriously, there's no market for it, and I think it could catch on pretty quickly.

Think about it - Young people watch shows on the Internet, and those shows tend to be short and/or humorous.  [I say "or" because there are some dramatic series on the Interwebs]  And keeping things short also cuts down on the budget (unless you really want to pay for expensive talent), and allows the opportunity to shoot multiple (short) episodes in a single setting (depending on the story you want to tell).

Point being, I think that (daytime) TV could find a new home on the Internet.  Just have to keep things short and interesting for the average viewer to watch.  And yes, I do know there's a plethora of shows out there on the Internet, but considering that we're dealing with infinite time, and not a set schedule (even though that's being blurred with DVR technology).  So conceivably, all of these Internet shows can be seen at some point.  All the person has to do is bookmark their favorite shows, and keep up with them.  Maybe even share with friends, and get suggestions for new shows from friends.

And isn't that how TV watching got started in the first place?

[craigladaily]

For those of you who've been following this blog, I've mentioned that I do a webshow (maybe).  It's called Win What's in Craig Reid's Left Pocket.

I know I haven't talked about the show much now a days (or updated much), but I've been recording new shows here in California.  This episode is the 45th in the series, and the fourth in the third season of the show.

Let's just say that this episode dispels the rumor that...

[craigladaily]

LA Day 120

Alright.  New plan!  Make money to stay alive out west...

Unfortunately, situations have become dire for me out here in LA, and getting fewer hours at work isn't helping much.  My resume is floating around currently, but it doesn't seem to be biting much.  I've been avoiding getting a second (retail) job, due to my lack of easy mode of transportation, but it looks like that's what I'm going to have to do to stay alive in this town.  As my mother said, I'm going to have to work to make enough money to stay in this town, or come back home and work at a local Starbucks (which, technically, I could transfer back to a store in Brooklyn; though at this point, it wouldn't be worth it to give up on my dreams out here...)

In other non-important news, my roommate had something that resembled a date last night.  Well, at least he had a girl over at the place and they were sleeping together when I came in on Friday (after working my first closing shift at work).  I say "congrats!" to Fabio, but at the same time, I wonder if this is going to be an ongoing thing...?  At least he's headed back home for the July 4th weekend, so I'll get the place to myself...

Then again, people don't like coming to my place because it's "far" and "out of the way", so it isn't like I'm going to have a wild party or anything....

Besides, I need to make money.  Gotta stay alive and get out of survival mode...

[craigladaily]

LA Day 105

I can't believe that I've survived out in Los Angeles for this long.  Sure, I've been bailed out by my folks once before, but it's been an uphill battle staying out here.  I'm trying to have as much fun as possible, but I'm realizing one key point about LA living:

I need a car...

Fortunately, I borrowed Kyle's car this week, and that made life so much easier.  Got to work early, actually stayed out "late", went grocery shopping (without having to rely on Fabio so much), and parked the car!  Sure, it was a little weird driving on the highway from the airport and putting some gas into the car (which was running on empty), but it felt liberating to have a vehicle.

I'm still trying to land that TV job that I came out here for.  Alas, that job I applied for in Santa Monica didn't work out so well - they filled the position, probably with one of the kids the producer recognized since they went to the same school.  Applied to a couple of other places (assistant contestant coordinator for Wheel of Fortune, among others), even started the process of becoming a CBS Page....

I talked with Andrew about LA Match.  We determined that we should try and secure some funding for prize money for the show.  And we're either going to shoot in a living room setting, or at the Pendleton Center.  One of the two...

I still miss Jackie.  Also, Steeley did mention that we're probably going down two separate paths in our lives.  (Maybe we'll cross paths again sometime soon.  I really miss the feel of her face...or just her face...maybe even just being with her....)

[craigladaily]

LA Day 63

A week came and went.

And in that week, I had visitors - April and Brendan came up from San Diego to visit me and Rogers.  It was fun hanging out with those guys one more time - playing video games, board games, drinking piña coladas, bowling, getting drunk, shopping.... Just hanging out with some really good friends of mine; something I haven't been able to do in about a year...

When they left, I went back to my usual Monday - Friday lifestyle.  I have other visitors - Irene and Natasha - staying with me as well, but their situation is a little different.  Let's just say that I was able to help them get started in their journey here in LA.

Got my paycheck from the coffeehouse, and for the first time, I made $500!  For 70 hours of work in two weeks...that's not something to laugh at.  I'm sure there are people who make that much in a week, or even a day, but I'll take the small victories as they come.

I've also been looking at getting a moped to help me get around town a bit easier.  But, I'm not sure what I'd need to do in order to legally operate one here in LA (and not get pulled over to get a ticket).  Getting around since selling the car has been a little tricky for me to pull off.  And I get the feeling that it's cutting me off from hanging out with my other friends that are here in LA.

But, I do have a steady job that does pay money that I need to stay afloat in this town.  So, that's more important right now...

[craigladaily]

LA Day 52

Good karma might finally be working in my favor.

One of my neighbors (Bee) is a security guard at one of the Warner Bros. TV studio lots.  So, she's been asking for my resume, so she could pass it off to some of the big wigs that show up at the studio.  I gave her some copies last night; she passed them off to some executives today, and gave me a post-it with their names tonight when...

I bought a bed!  Sure, it was from the couple next door to me, and about a year old, but still, it's a bed!! And only for $60! Not a bad deal, I might say.  So now I can continue my move up - from couch, to air mattress, to queen-size mattress!  Tonight, I'll break it in by actually sleeping in it.  But one of these days, I might actually break it in.  Hopefully it won't take...

It's almost been three years since I've known Corrie, but she keeps popping up in my stories every now and then.  Currently, she feels like I'm not being supportive enough of her, even though I'm weary of my emotions towards her.  Remember, there is no chance that we'd wind up together, and I'm trying to quell whatever lingering feelings I might have left for her.  Doesn't help much that she was the last girl who...

Speaking of, there's Jackie.  But that's all I'm going to say about that...

Importantly though, I had my review at work (Starbucks) today.  I also got my raise to $9.24/hour.  Though, I wonder how much that would've been had I stayed in NYC?  No matter though.  I'm in LA, and I'm starting to have a good time.

Just can't wait for Thursday when April and Brendan show up one more time!!

[craigladaily]

LA Day 49

You know, ever since I sold that car, life has gotten a little more easier...

Overslept my alarm, and wound up getting into work late.  Katie was a little peeved about it, but I think that I won't be running late again any time soon... Wound up working in the drive-thru for a while, and experienced my first "late start" - all of the high school kids were at the store in the morning, getting Frappuccinos and whatnot.  It was a lot of people.  Especially in the drive thru - we didn't hit our personal record of 60, but kinda hit the ballpark with 43.  I still enjoy conversing with the customers.

After work, spoke to Ryan for a few.  He's an marketing specialist who spends a lot of time at our store, and I just asked him randomly if he could help me out get some more eyeballs for my Win What's in Craig Reid's Left Pocket show.  Turns out, we got into a discussion about how to improve my web presence, since that'll be a great way to get my name out there.  He also suggested getting an HD camera, and/or connected to an agent - again, to help make me look credible in this competitive market.  (Interesting to point out that there aren't that many Internet-based game shows out there.  Especially video based...)

Keisha drove me home, since she was going in that direction to drop off some stuff to another Starbucks (Glenoaks/Western).  Chilled out at home and spoke with our neighbors for a few...

Fabio came home, and we went bowling!  Met Fabio's friend, Bruce, at the alley, and he seems cool.  Too bad it took me three games to finally warm up and bowl my first 100+ game in a long while.  Also seemed like high school date night tonight at the alley...

I remember date night at the bowling alley...  I think I have a 20% success rate with that strategy....

[craigladaily]

So apparently I'm walking distance away from this bowling alley.  A good 20 minute walk, that is.  Still, that's good walking distance.  And the prices aren't half bad either...

[craigladaily]

LA Day 47

You know what?

I spoke to my cousin Shane this morning.  Basically, I have to look out for myself.  Here I am, trying to survive in LA, and for the most part, my parents are bringing me down.  I'm here trying to live out my dream, but I'm worried about their approval.  About a girl who doesn't want to connect with me.  About...failing....  I have supporters back home - Shane, my old co-worker Karamel (who also called today), Liz (another STBX manager; called her during my lunch break), even that girl who won't talk to me (I think).  People are rooting me on (from afar), somewhat jealous that I've made such a big leap to pursue my dream - of becoming the next big game show host.

Sure, at work I was glum about being a failure.  But, I haven't failed yet.  I'm about to hit week 8 out west.  I may be broke, single and without an actual bed/mattress, but at least I have a roof over my head.  Friends at work.  Even friends at Starbucks whom I don't work with.  And, of course, a good roommate.  (That always helps with tandem situations like this one)

So you know what.  If you think that I won't make it out here - FUCK YOU!  I'm here to pursue my dreams, to make something of myself.  Sure the road is going to be long and treacherous, but if you're going to count me out before I even get going, then what the hell are you trying to do?  You're not being supportive. You're just hurting me and discouraging me.  And honestly, I really don't need that in this point in my life.

So love me for the joker I am.  Accept the fact that I'm doing something you might not agree with.  Support me with whatever I'm doing, and just believe that I have some sort of an idea of what I'm doing.  And when I do make it, I might just remember you for being there to tell me to keep going, instead of to come home and do something else.

This (TV game shows) is something I'm really passionate about, and I better strike the oil while it's still hot.  I'm in the place to be for this business, and I'm going to make it.  Just bare with me for a few weeks, months...however long it takes for me to get to where I want to be.  It'll all work out in the end, and you'll be able to see me on your TV sets 5 days a week or something like that.

After all, it will get better...

[craigladaily]

LA Day 46

Seriously?

46 days ago, I hopped on a plane headed to LA to start life anew, while somehow making a name for myself in the television industry.  Sure, it's been seven weeks, but I haven't made any strides into the TV industry yet, though life has begun anew...in a sense.  I've probably done more "growing up" in my time here than spent at home - I couch surfed, I found an apartment (with a cool guy to split it with), I bought a car...I'm going to sell that piece of shit.

I was beginning to feel somewhat hopeful about the future.  That is, until I saw my friend Shana making out with a guy that she's been seeing at work today.  (They're on their way to Vegas, but that's not important...)  Now while that shouldn't bother me, it got me thinking about where I am now in my journey...

I still don't feel comfortable talking to my parents:  Sure, I love them and all, but ever since I bought that dammed car, Dad hasn't had much to say to me, and Mom just seems to be a bit overprotective.  Then again, she's always been like this, so I just have to deal with it.  What hurts more (and confuses me) is my Dad's reaction.  For a while, he didn't call, he also seemed distant whenever I did call him.  It's gotten to the point of awkward silence...and that's just too awkward for me to deal with.

I still miss Jackie...terribly:  She knows this, yet insists that we stop sending texts to each other.  Probably because she's still busy with school stuff.  Probably because she doesn't want to get too attached to me.  Probably because she's scared of the long-distance thing not working out.  All I know is that I'm somewhat miserable because of this.  Sure, my relationship experience might be limited, but I've found that I was happier when I was with someone.  Or doing something that I truly loved to do.

Almost hitting 3 years:  This is more of a moot point, but it occurred to me recently that the last person I was "intimate" with was Corrie...almost three years ago.  Just sayin'...

Now that I think about things, I should just let go of the past, and try to look ahead to the future.

But some things are easier to let go of than others...

Still can't wait to get rid of that damn car though...

[craigladaily]

LA Day 42

I've never been to this Casting Office bar that my friends out here in LA keep mentioning, and I really wanted to go.  Which is why I wound up at Kyle's place at around 3p Thursday afternoon...for when they all decided to leave at around 11p that night.  Though, after the night's happenings, I became that "reliable" friend as I had to drive Brandon home.  We got lost going down the wrong way on Magnolia Avenue...and corrected our path as soon as we realized that we weren't headed towards Kyle's place.

Didn't stay there for long.  Like I alluded to, Brandon was...well....

I crashed at Brandon's place...

We all met up the next morning at Brandon's place, to catch an early morning viewing of Your Highness to save a little bit of money at the theater.  The movie itself was alright at best (but that's all I'm going to say about that movie).

We wound up walking around for a bit after the movie - most of the gang went off to get bagels; Emily and I (later joined by Peter) went over to Starbucks, since she had a craving for that place...and I get a 30% discount.  We split up again not too much long after that - and I went back to Kyle's place, mainly because I needed to get a new pass for next week's bus travels.

Bus traveling shouldn't take 2+ hours for a little 5 mile trip.  But it did...

[craigladaily]

LA Day 41

Don't know how to describe this one...

This was the beginning of my weekend off from working at Starbucks, and I wanted to make the best of it. So I took the bus...to Starbucks.... Did some figuring, and I realized that after making some spending cuts, ditching the car, and assuming I'd make $750/month...I'm set to lose about $450/month with all of the stuff I have to pay and whatnot. In short, I need a second job...

Which leads me to Kyle's - I wanted to drop off Emily's/Evan's coffee for the month. Turns out that they're going to Casting Office tonight, and since I'd figure that everyone would be too wasted to give me a ride by the time they were ready to go to the bar....

Funny story though. I got my roommate hooked on the "Sonic the Hedgehog" game last night. Said it brought back memories of his childhood. And it is a pretty good game....

[craigladaily]

LA Day 39

Reset!

Things have been getting interesting around here.  Kyle and I went to the junkyard again yesterday, but we still weren't able to get the part that I think I need to fix my car.  Frustrated, and beginning to think about my monetary issues, I inquire about selling the car at the Pick-A-Part junkyard we visited.  $410 if they picked it up from my place, and $460 if I drove the car over to them.

So now I'm thinking, should I sell the car to the junkyard or keep trying to fix it myself?  It is dangerous to drive in it's current state (parallel parking would be a bitch), and the car's currently uninsured - getting insurance, registration, and a new license would be a lot of money.  A bad thing now since I don't have that much left to play with in my bank account.

The extra money could help.  But it'd be a loss of being able to get around town easier, and whenever I wanted.  Then again, at this point in the game, it's all about survival, and having that car isn't helping me right now...

[craigladaily]

LA Day 35

The ending of the fifth week didn't really prove anything.

It's still awkward talking to Dad; it's become a little bit more manageable talking to Mom, even though we talk every day...

Work was horrible.  I was still feeling depressed after explaining to my friend Janice back in Brooklyn the shit that's been going on so far.  Then I saw my first paycheck - $373 after two weeks of working.  Didn't help much that it was hot out today - Frappucinos were the drink of choice, and I asked Florence (the manager) to work on drive-thru register, rather than the front register, just to get more drive-thru experience.

We had lines outside.  People in their cars, sitting around waiting for their coffee.  Surprisingly, there were a couple of people who didn't mind the wait.  There were others, however, who just needed to pick on the messenger (me).  

[One lady complained when I "overcharged" her for two chocolate milks for her kids.  She described it as "milk with chocolate" so I punched in "Milk" and added "cocoa".  Turns out the other partners ring up the "Kids Hot Chocolate", even though it wasn't hot.  And when I gave them to her in the iced tall cups, she stopped her car at the end of the drive-thru, and walked back to my post and demanded that I put the drinks in the short cups so her kids "wouldn't have so much sugar".  Didn't matter much that I was assisting someone else at the time...

Also had another customer get irate with me because she waited "an hour" for her drink.  Granted, I personally was sorry that she waited, in reality, 10 minutes for her drink, but with a line of Frappucinos that needed to be made and only two blenders in the store, there's going to be a wait.  Especially with the different flavors (mocha, caramel), extra coffee, decaf coffee, whipped cream, etc., etc. - there's going to be a wait for drinks.  Everyone in the store was busy - my role was to make sure the line outside kept flowing in a efficient matter.  And considering that other people joked about the wait, even asked if we were really busy today, that lady's comments were really not necessary.  She just made my shitty day that much more shittier...]

I left work at 4:30p, got home at 5:50p.  Still felt shitty...so I wound up taking a nap...somewhat....

Fabio suggested going to see a movie, and I talked Rogers into coming along with us.

It's called The Source Code, and I'd suggest seeing it if I were you.

It was the diversion that I needed after such a hard day in life.  After all, I finished five weeks here in LA, and I'm not dead yet.  Sure the car still can't run, but I'm working on that...

Though I should finish the paperwork for the insurance...

And Jackie knows that I miss her, so why don't I know that she misses me?