Jesus is my helmet. @crane-legs - Tumblr Blog

sometimes im like "wow holy shit im being really fucking annoying. i should stop talking" and then i pull out my magic 8 ball and it says "youve always been annoying and your friends chose to talk you anyways. youll be fine" and im like wow thanks magic 8 ball. and then the ogre attacks me

tlirsgender

Shouldn't have put the new year in the middle of winter cause then everyone expects you to get your shit together in january. Of all times

tlirsgender

"What's your new years resolution" Survive. Ask me again when I'm not vitamin d deficient

parkayquarts

hbo max blocks screenshots even when I use the snipping tool AND firefox AND ublock which is a fucking first. i will never understand streaming services blocking the ability to take screenshots thats literally free advertising for your show right there. HOW THE HELL IS SOMEBODY GONNA PIRATE YOUR SHOW THROUGH SCREENSHOTS. JACKASS

parkayquarts

somewhere out there is a guy who meticulously takes screenshots of every individual frame of his favorite tv shows and then painstakingly etches each one onto a roll of film which he puts into his old timey projector and recreates the footage as a silent film with his own lavishly hand-lettered dialogue cards and original score that he plays on his upright piano and charges audiences one shiny penny a play. at last, big media has finally outsmarted ol' Zachary Zoetrope

srrybabe

oh to lay on top of someone and hug them like a teddy bear and just sleep like that

theshitpostcalligrapher

i went to the bar with some pals the other day and they had this delightful seventeen dollar charcuterie board thing that you could share, it had cheeses, crackers, dried sausage, and little containers of pickles and olives and i think thats what's triggered festive mode in my brain more than anything else

nothing says 'holidays' to me like eating my weight in various small cheeses idk why

#merry crisis