Dwayne “The Rock Monster “ Johnson
So I play a game of Pathfinder at my local game store. I play a half ork barbarian named Git Stompa, that is relatively intelligent, but I tend to let him embrace his inner ork most of the time. So, we just came across this island, (our halfling scoundrel has a ship) and we decide to head there. We moor our ship a little ways off the coast, and we head the rest of the way to the island in our little schooner. We explore the island a bit, find a barrier, go past it, fight some lizard men while our scoundrel finds what the magic barrier is keeping inside: a water nymph. So he gambled with our lives, wins, and she proceeds to look outside, and finds that we are in the lizard folk, or as she calls them, her pets. So she gets angry and summons a large earth elemental using ‘summon ally of nature’ the following happens:
D.M. : The earth elemental just stands there.
Me: Git Stompa waves to the earth elemental, and says, “Hi!”
D.M. : Oh geeze. Uhm, the earth elemental waves back and says, “Hi.”
Me: Git Stompa motions to himself and says “Me friend”
D.M. : Roll a diplomacy check
Me: * rolls dice, winces * I got a five.
D.M. * rolls dice, face palms and shakes his head * The earth elemental nods, and smiles “Friend”
The Party: Looks in shock at what is going on
Me, also a little bit in shock : Okay, Git Stompa grabs him by the hand and leads him towards the boat. “You come with me friend!”
D.M. : The elemental follows.
One of our Dwarves, an alchemist, currently riding Git Stompa‘s shoulders: “Come along George.”
Me: Git Stompa looks up at the earth elemental “You like that name? George?”
D.M. : The earth elemental shrugs his shoulders “Not really.”
Dwarf alchemist : “No! We should call him Dwayne!”
Me: “Dwayne ‘The Rock Monster’ Johnson!”
The entire party erupts in laughter
Later on, when we quite haven’t thought through how we are getting Dwayne on the boat, our other Dwarf, a sorcerer I believe, after digging through her list of spells finds where she can make creatures walk on water, and comes up with the plan of using the spell on Dwayne and Git Stompa so we can get Dwayne back to the ship. The D.M. allows this, and then looks right at me.
D.M. : Alrigt. You’re gonna have to roll one hell of a diplomacy check to get this rock elemental to think he can walk one water, because “Dwayne no float”
Me : * rolls dice, and almost bursts out laughing. I then look at the D.M. * “Does a nat 20 work?”
D.M.: Throws up his hands, and gives up at this point
Everyone then breaks out in laughter, and now we have an earth elemental named Dwayne “The Rock Monster” Johnson in our party. We also unleashed a water nymph out on the world, and pissed off a bunch of trent, but all in all, it was a good session.
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