even death has a heart

Eli | 29 | They/He | Married | All Types of Queer | Space Enthusiast

[fostershyperfixator]

My local library had a days since James Patterson last published counter.

[official-library-posts]

official library post

[intothestacks]

I need non-librarians to understand that this is not a celebratory counter. It's a plea for help.

[thememedaddy]

[cassylvan]

i realized i never posted this on tumblr??? anyways here ya go tumblr

[dawn4ngel]

[bbcwhereareyou]

[punchholesinthesky]

[gallamy]

Now what the fuck is this picture

[almostdefinitelydying]

The early 2000s distilled down to its very essence.

[necrofuturism]

he's jacking off their invisible cyber dicks

[importantcatpics]

[keepyourmouthshutandyourmindopen]

Need one more to unlock the door

[thedogeveryonehates]

[punkitt-is-here]

[felixcloud6288]

#i attempt one of these and knock myself unconscious for eight hours

[nicoyarobin]

[crabussy]

wow I love to sit crosslegged without moving for several hours straight!

[crabussy]

okay time to straighten my legs man I'm so excited

[crabussy]

I f eel like a suit of armour that was attacked by a welder

[crabussy]

I am nineteen years old

[crabussy]

I am so sorry I just turned 20 I hope you can forgive me

[crabussy]

. yeah okay true I did do that

[fuckyeahchinesefashion]

Step-by-step guide to wield a ‘Golden Cudgel’ like the Monkey King Sun Wukong by 襄阳梅子

[casual-darkness]

[shimmervee]

be sure to leave out milk and cookies for brutus tonight

[statelywingmanor]

You can leave as many cookies as you want but he’ll only et two

[shimmervee]

this remains the funniest addition anyone’s made to one of my posts

[darkcomedies]

evoking bertholt brecht’s “the way people cast a play!” quote as a spell against prescriptive, stereotypical, fatalistic typecasting

[darkcomedies]

idk what to tell you except go look at the fishwives

[mynorthernattitude]

they should make a sleep that feels like you’ve slept

[bisexualcreature-deactivated202]

lvl 1: the plural of octopus is octopuses because the plural version of a word is the word with an s at the end

lvl 2: the plural version of octopus is octopi because if a word ends with "us" the plural version replaces the "us" with "i" e.g. cactus -> cacti and fungus -> fungi

lvl 3: actually, that rule is only for latin words. octopus is a greek word and the correct plural is octopuses or octopodes

lvl 4: actually, language is descriptive not prescriptive. since enough people over time have used octopi as the plural for octopus, it's a valid plural

lvl 5: the plural of octopus is octopeese, like geese

[asteroidtroglodyte]

Lvl 6: My Marine Biology professor told me it was technically “Octopods” to bring it in line with “Cephalopod,” but that if the class is falling asleep you can call them “Octopussies”

[impact]

[squeakitties]

loudspeaker interference ATTENTION ALL SHOPPERS THERE IS A FUCKING BEAST LOOSE IN THE HARDWARE AISLE

[sunshine-tattoo]

im just here to buy some paint you don't have to be a dick about it

[karda]

the best colors ever actually

[karda]

for those gradient enjoyers

[natequarter]

[ID: three shades of yellow and orange, followed by the same colours in a gradient. /end ID]

[yaoiblackmold]

I was enjoying the gradient until I read the image ID and realised I'm not seeing the correct gradients

[themarshmallowreturns]

bruh HOW