It's only forever, not long at all.

I like fashion, cats, and boobies.

[gallusrostromegalus]

A cat is a machine that turns proteins into violence.

[starathsbunker]

#Helios was declawed by his former owners so he doesn't just slap things he dislikes like most cats#he really only feels confident in hissing at them#Especially because a lot of the thing he doesn't like are bugs and those are sharp sometimes :(#Selene has figured this out and now when she hears him hiss she sprints over the kill the fuck out of the bug#Helios has learned she will do this so he'll hiss at stuff louder and louder until she hears him#A nervous old man and his emotional support homicidal maniac tags by @gallusrostromegalus

I couldn't reblog without the tags because the context is hilarious

[gallusrostromegalus]

A Nervous Old Man (right) and his Emotional Support Violence Machine (Left)

Yes, he is more than twice her size. Yes, he is five times her age. Yes, he cries like a big baby until she kills Unacceptable Scary Things (earwigs) for him.

[cm8x-insanity]

I couldn't get these two and their dynamic out of my head, @gallusrostromegalus I doodled them (guessed on their collars)

[gallusrostromegalus]

OH MY GOD MY CATS HAVE FANART

[vitariesocks]

just received the best text message I’ve ever had. from my mom

[vitariesocks]

2 pics. no caption

[anglaised]

it is so annoying being so self aware about all my issues like okay what now girl

[thecollectibles]

Virgo by Artem Chebokha

[hylianane]

functionally suicidal character saying “I would die for you” to their significant other and its like. I get the sentiment, honey, but if a hot dog vendor told me he’d sell hot dogs for me, I wouldn’t feel very moved now would I

[maseratus]

Now a functionally suicidal character saying “I will live for you”. Now that’s a dynamic I can sink my teeth into.

[mousidy]

now how about a functionally suicidal character saying "I will sell hot dogs for you"

[mousidy]

[bisthefairy]

Hotdog vender lays down their life to protect their suicidal partner, who then takes over the hotdog stand to carry on their memory...

[maightymai]

[cipheramnesia]

It's like talking to a 2010 Old Spice commercial with you people

[cheaphalloweencostume]

my least favorite literary smut turn of phrase is when a guy is like “im gonna ruin this pussy” “im gonna wreck this pussy for anyone else” like stop.. thats not yours…!

[goofda]

“Imma destroy that pussy” my friend 😔

[eirene]

The Passer-By (Le Passant), ca. 1898 Robert Engels

[notahorseindisguise]

everytime i wear an outfit like this i think about this tweet

[waterboarding-deactivated201705]

I feel bad when I watch Alice in Wonderland because this poor little girl is lost and this rude ass atheist caterpillar keeps vaping in her face… poor kid

[wtf-scientific-papers]

Wang and Lai (2014)

[gemstone-gynoid]

[beemovieerotica]

[animentality]

[currentlycryingaboutlancelot]

realized i have started texting like mr darcy

[plasmalogical]

[dinovelvet]

[sharkinablanket]

[thefoolishkat]

and they are the bestest of friends

[petewentz-]

It's fun being queer and weird and unconventional until you remember you live in a society

[dogpuppy]

[swordseer]

[batsandboba]

“scientists don’t want you know” is a phrase that always cracks me up because if you actually meet a scientist they will be shaking and crying like an overstimulated chihuahua with the need to let you know