The Ink-Well @cursedskull-666 - Tumblr Blog

no leaves, but plenty of eyes.

inspired by me spacing out on a long drive & staring at trees. this happened earlier this year, and birches ended up growing leaves before i finished the doll.

all branches & roots are made of metal wire + hot glue, which makes them poseable and also keeps them from snapping.

robertreich

Trump's corruption is making us all less safe.

mariacallous

persisting

People keep popping up in the replies on that post to insist that adults are and can be groomed and I am the world’s most exhausted whack-a-mole champ.

persisting

The thing a lot of the people who keep returning to that post to yell YUH HUH ADULTS ARE GROOMED don’t get is that I’m actually trying to advocate for children too, here. I work in Trust and Safety, which is a largely digital field devoted to all things terrible you can do online: terrorism, self-harm, and, of course, CSAM and CSA, which are my career speciality. I’m considered an expert in my field. I helped to build anti-abuse tooling that the (Biden) White House shouted out as a revolutionary step forward in combating grooming online. I was part of the team who first ousted and identified the people and behaviors behind 764, a really hideous ring of abusers whom I don’t recommend you look up unless you have a strong stomach. Some of the arrests in those cases are directly my doing.

Simultaneously, I’m an adult who, in my spare time, enjoys engaging in adult fiction spaces. As a result of that, I have, unfortunately, been shouted at a decent number of times by young adults (18-25 seems to be the common range) about children, and their well being, and how what happens in adult fiction spaces causes harm to children, and themselves by proxy. (I’ve also been yelled at by actual children, but I’m happy to ignore them, given many of them have been influenced by the previously mentioned young adults to behave that way.)

“Grooming” isn’t truly a technical term, though my industry uses it as one often. It doesn’t have a precise definition or pattern of behavior beyond “inappropriate conduct with a child.” It’s had other uses, of course, like saying someone was “groomed to inherit a title” or similar. But generally what we mean online is “this has to do with child abuse.”

Children are, no joke, one of the most uniquely oppressed classes of human being in the world. Most of the time, they simply have no recourse, no legal right to self-advocate, no ability to retain counsel, choose their own living environment, what they do, how they dress, what they eat. To even report their own abuse — which I assure you, most children are perfectly aware is abuse — they must first be believed by an adult, who may then choose to do something on the child’s behalf, or not. Any option a child has for safety or freedom of choice is entirely dependent on an adult deigning to humor them in the first place.

When you turn the age of majority in your country, you are automatically given a new set of legal and social rights. Even a severely disabled adult, in most places, may advocate for their rights on the basis of their legal adulthood. (There are constant failures here by the legal system, of course, but the point is that you are allowed to advocate in the first place.) You become a different class of person, who can do and ask for things that children are simply not allowed to.

When you try to say that “adults can be groomed,” by bringing up all kinds of random possibilities like “well what about cults” “what about age gaps and different levels of life experience” “what about this or that,” you’re still ignoring the idea that the exploited adult has recourse, in those situations (again, leaving out that there are many failings with the system that allows that recourse does not eliminate the fact that recourse is an option.) Restraining orders. Moving away. Going no contact, with no parent to force you to continue to see that person on holidays. Even if you are young, you are not helpless. You have an agency allowed to you that children simply are not given.

Of course, an 18 year old can be abused and exploited. And I absolutely am wary of a 19 year old dating a 40 year old — personally, I question the shit out of that. I’d even suspect that that 19 year old was previously groomed in some way. But the distinction is important to me, here, not to diminish the abuse that young adults can face, but to ensure that the plight of children is properly understood.

Children matter to me. Their harms and their rights matter to me. And just as I find it reprehensible to compare the fictional behaviors of fictional characters to real world harm, I am frustrated with the constant need to insist that young adults are on the same harm level as children are. It is the very opposite of “who gives a shit about kids and young people suffering.”

persisting

Once in a while I still see people going on about young adults being “groomed,” so here again is my take on why that’s wrong and unhelpful.

252mya

Glyptodont skull diversity is genuinely wild. Line ten of them up side by side and every single one looks different. These giant armored cousins of armadillos trundled across the Ice Age Americas, the biggest of them the size of a small car. This poster by Joschua Knüppe draws them like a classic natural history plate, with a human silhouette in the bottom row for scale. Printed on heavyweight luster paper with archival color. Available at https://fossi.ls/1ABDut.

amvs

genuinely they have probably saved people.

amvs

they HAVE saved people actually i’m 100% sure of that. i’ve learned about so many recalls i would’ve had no idea about otherwise !!!! from the bottom of all of our hearts thank you mamoru

mamoru

aw shucks, thank YOU! what a pick me up!

when I was younger, I got food poisoning. I was supposed to recover from it, but I wound up with a bunch of nasty medical conditions instead. I never imagined I would become disabled from food.

so I am really glad I have been able to help spread the word every now and then about food safety and recalls, since it hopefully means a few less people going through what I have.

while I have your attention, I do not post every recall, even just for the US, so here are a few of the links I use!

recalls.gov/recent.html <- aggregate of official government recall links for the US! food, drugs, products, child safety seats, motor vehicles, and tires! (half the feeds are broken half the time, but hey, it works™! check the FDA enforcement reports for a more complete list of recalls, especially drug recalls!)

recalls for canada <- recalls for canada!

RASFF <- food recalls and safety alerts for the EU!

food safety news <- news about food safety in the US, canada, and around the world!

I was poisoned <- see where people have gotten food poisoning near you, and report your own! (worldwide!)

thanks for reading, stay safe and take care!

beaft

the phrase "but i didn't mean to!" in the context of causing harm is kind of redundant to me, because almost nobody means to cause harm. most of us just want to do the right thing. and i don't mean that in a wishy-washy "oh, we're all good deep down" way, i mean that even people who regularly do the most heinous shit imaginable will have a way of justifying it to themselves. the world is not populated by hollywood sadists and psychopaths.

beaft

actually i have been thinking about this some more and i want to add on to it:

abuse in caregiving professions (like teaching or nursing) is not solely a result of power dynamics. it's also because people who go into those professions tend to have a idea of themselves as Good People. recognising or acknowledging their own capacity for harm contradicts that idea. so they mentally put 'people who have inconvenienced me' into the 'Bad People' box (which conveniently doubles up as the 'People I Am Allowed to Hurt' box), and just like that, the world is made simple again.

i read ross greene a lot when i was working with 'difficult' or 'behaviourally challenged' children. his refrain is kids do well if they can - meaning, in short, that most kids act out only when the demands of a situation exceed their capabilities. punishing them for this is not only cruel but also completely pointless, because they also don't want to be doing what they are doing.

a teacher who believes that there are two categories of people - Good People who Mean Well, and Bad People who Cause Problems on Purpose - is not going to see it that way. they're gonna put themselves in the first category, and the misbehaving kid in the second category. and once they have effectively depersoned the kid and placed themselves on a pedestal, they can treat that kid however they want while still maintaining a moral high ground. because abuse is something that only Bad People do.

apollosunn-moved-deactivated202

anyone else relate

midnightclover

enki2

transcyberism

ok but this unironically works. talk about how the working class is exploited and you can basically sell full-on marxism to your average republican if you do it right. all you have to do is avoid the words "Marx," "capitalism," "socialism," "communism," "means of production," etc - just use synonyms. say "big business" or "corporate shareholder interests" instead of "capitalists." say "a government that prioritizes the needs of the working people" instead of "socialism." it WORKS. I've DONE it. the hardest sell are usually things like social and racial equity, welfare, things like that, because people have been primed with the racist/classist idea that those things are somehow unfair - but you can get your foot in the door to getting them to buy into those too if you start with class issues. read up on your theory, make sure you REALLY understand your own ideology, because that will enable you to reword it and successfully sell it.

a-ginger-in-black

In my experience, you can often help sell 'welfare' stuff by appealing to self-interest with a touch of Aren't We Great.

Disability benefits: "I mean, sure, there are probably some sad sacks who are gaming the system, there always are, but hell, with the amount of taxes we pay, the government can afford a few freeloaders, right? I'd rather pay for a couple people who don't really need it than not have the system at all for if I need it, or my kids do, or whatever. I mean shit happens. What if some asshole drunk driver puts me in the hospital and it takes me a year to get back on my feet? Or Heaven forbid something permanent happens. I'll sure be glad that I can get disability then, won't I?"

UBI: "I dunno, the kind of guy who'll just sit on the couch playing Call of Duty all day if he doesn't have to work, I kinda don't want him on my job site anyway. That type is just taking up a place that you could fill with someone who'll actually get the job done, you know? You end up short-handed even though you technically have enough people because everyone else has to pick up his slack. And it'd mean that if your boss is a dick you can tell him to shove it and not worry your kids are gonna go hungry while you find a better place. We can sure as hell afford it."

Racial equity: "I've got a lot more in common with a Black guy who's just trying to get the job done than I do with some rich white asshole who thinks the sun shines out of his ass because of how much money mommy and daddy have."

oyasumiaow

i'm forever haunted that mdzs wiki says jin rusong died when he was "at most seven"

seven

SEVEN

seven is a whole first grader!

and given that! I desire more things which characterize everyone who experienced his brief life with more of the absolute fucking devastation that comes with losing a child out of your life that way. I'm not even talking about strictly his parents (although obviously I'd be into this as well), I'm talking about Jin Ling, who would've been growing up alongside him. Give me Nie Huaisang's crunchy feelings about this child who was described as sweet and well loved. Lan Xichen????? Jiang Cheng???

no I don't think this is a farfetched concept, I have multiple grade-school children in my life by both literal blood relation and adopted relation and I would both be a wreck and forever changed if one of them died, let alone by murder!

anyway. just had to get that thought out of my noggin.

dragongirlafro

ok i know i'm one to talk but genuinely if you think 👍 or ❤️ is "passive aggressive" you might be spending a bit too much time on your phone jeez louise

dragongirltitties

who thinks 👍 is passive aggressive i read it as an old timey mobster going "on it boss"

mollyjames

Whenever I use thumbs up I'm sticking my hand out from under a pile of rubble, too exhausted to speak, but signalling I'm okay

covid-safer-hotties

Also preserved in our archive

Did you know that we’re still in a pandemic? In Scotland, doctors are recommending face masks in crowded public spaces. New Health Canada guidelines recommend masks “when appropriate.” Public health in North Carolina also recommends masks when in public areas. Why are health agencies still recommending people try to protect themselves and others from COVID-19? Probably because hundreds of thousands of studies continue to show that COVID-19 is destructive for immediate and long-term health. Odds of getting “long COVID” or some other health issue go up with every infection. About one in six infections leads to long COVID. Rolling Stone reports, “long COVID is real and it’s changing an entire generation.” People have lost housing because of long COVID and are more likely to get COVID again if they are unhoused. Governments, in the interest of maintaining the status quo and keeping the population calm and under control, seem to be misleading people and hoping for the best.

selenethevampirequeen

Okay, so, more personal junk, cause tbh I just need the transandrophobes to understand. Yall know you're driving away other transfems too, right?

Like, I avoid transfem spaces over this, because yall fucking hurt my community, and I don't want to share a space with people that would do that.

I don't trust people that would stab other members of our community in the back. I can't.

If any transfem transandrophobes read this, you wanna know why transfem spaces are losing members? Look in the mirror, it's because of you, because we won't share space with hate.

Yall hurt our transmasc and nonbinary siblings way more than you hurt me, cause I can go to them to find community, and they can't seem to escape you; but you don't seem to care about that, so here we are. By hurting them, you hurt us too.

It pisses me off, but it's also just fucking humiliating, it's humiliating to see the depths that people just like me fucking sink to. Worse still, I know there was a time in my life where I'd have fallen for it, and I'm so fucking glad yall didn't reach me when I was that person, because it would have genuinely ruined me.

So just think about that, the next time you feel like bashing a transmasc person for no other reason but to take out your petty malice; you're destroying your own community in the process. Hate will eventually eat you alive.