NOTICE: The Machine Longs For Your Touch

18+ tech/objectum blog | it/its | 22 | header and pfp by me - thats my hand and my computer | endogenic system

[cybersexisholy]

url credit - @.taohun

uhhhh mod here. wheatley's the name, feeling Normal™️ about machines is the game. mainblog is @lovedtogekiss .

this is mostly my personal blog but everyone over 18 is welcome here too. please have some indicator of adultness or age somewhere i can see so i can at least pretend there arent minors following my blog. a few exceptions will be made for follow-backs and people i know personally and the like

oh yeah tag shit

#digital love - everything that isnt a picture of a physical piece of hardware. i forget this one a lot

#dickware - pictures of physical pieces of hardware

#cirqueue - queue tag

#'puter humour - shitposts mostly

#life in colour - art

#moving pictures - gifs

#all we do is advertise - adverts for various pieces of hard and software. i have a special tag for these because i like seeing them a lot

#speaker talk - shit i say

i kin. so many things but ill list the robots here... uhhhh later. robot/ai/robot-adjacent kinlist dropped lets get this bread (full list here)

- wheatley (portal 2)

- oracle turret (portal 2)

- space core (portal 2)

- the pink addison (deltarune)

- sweet (deltarune)

- spamton (deltarune)

- haym/yellow 1010 (no straight roads)

- sayu (no straight roads)

- dj yellow (rhythm heaven)

- tommy coolatta (hlvrai)

- nintendo ds (real life)

- yui (sword art online)

feel free to send in asks abt my kins i love talking about em

have a fun day and if you put discourse in my inbox ill explode you in my mind.

[svetalmeow]

now i must endure it to the end

[necromancelena]

i wish usb ports were several magnitudes larger and made a hefty "kerchunk" sound when you plugged stuff in

[relia-robot]

[muivech]

[wiresonwiresonwires]

All objectums need to get FREAKIER and MORE ANNOYING!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NOW!!!!!!!!!

[wounded-minecraft-screenshots]

they should make a minecraft arg protagonist who's objectum and feels attached to their commandblock. #theirblock

[pennywolf]

[mx-marriott]

look for beauty, you will find it

[anoxthon]

being a robotfucker while also being tech illiterate is so embarrassing

[anoxthon]

i'm like a straight man who doesn't know how to find the clit

[datafags]

guide to computer sex:

case fans: don't put your dick in these. stroke the outside carefully, in a circular motion, for maximum stimulation

usb ports: great place for penetration. flash drives are the traditional option but you can connect nearly anything, ask your partner if theyre into something specific. if theyre really kinky, try viruses or pentesting tools like the flipper zero.

power button: threatening to press it can be incredibly hot, but only actually press it with enthusiastic consent.

removable side panel: for getting really intimate. be very careful, the internals are sensitive!

hotswappable parts: sometimes SSDs (M.2 SSDs will be screwed in parallel to the motherboard, others may look different), HDDs (spinning disks inside big cases, usually get their own bay), and GPUs (big chips with fans attached) can be removed while your partner is running, but not all computers support this. this is a common part of BDSM, but make absolutely sure it's safe beforehand.

motherboard: the MOST sensitive part of their body! touch lightly and carefully. running the tips of your fingers along the traces is incredibly stimulating. play with the capacitors, too.

screws: loosening screws can be incredibly erotic, but be careful. especially with M.2 SSDs, this may cause problems! only loosen an M.2 drive if it is NOT mounted.

software: virus play was mentioned earlier, but also simply running very demanding software can be erotic.

download play: downloading embarrassing or illicit files is very hot. be sure to ask consent before installing league of legends.

firewall play: opening up or disabling your partner's firewall can be thought of as akin to exhibitionism. be careful with this, it can be a security risk, but most of the time it's not a big issue.

BIOS play: messing with your partner's BIOS settings can be incredibly intimate. remember, overclocking can be dangerous, only do it in small increments and very carefully! try starting with changing XMP profiles or something first.

that nub they have on thinkpad laptops: that's the clit.

remember some key safety tips:

ALWAYS wear protection! a static wrist strap is important if you are touching the internals, especially the motherboard.

heat warning! your partner will run hot when they're aroused. the GPU and CPU will burn you! even the SSD may run quite hot, especially during download play.

don't stick your dick in the fans. please.

for extra protection, keep viruses isolated inside a virtual machine.

[bbeeew-boodles]

back by popular demand, lime being a FREAKKKK

[northirish]

Bet it feels good as fuck to be disassembled, cleaned and then reassembled as a firearm

[transmechanicus]

o yeah babey

[evilselfishfool]

this is why they shouldn’t have banned normal porn

[transmechanicus]

no amount of cishets going to plapsburg could ever distract me from the cold certainty of steel

[rainbowryland]

we're all down bad for the hail mary huh

i'm a plane guy, i get it. she's hot and y'alls tags are valid.

bonus:

[robotfuckerconfessions-2]

i got a little portable dvd player at the thrift store and...oh my god he's just so cute!! he groans a little bit when i open him up, and the latch for the dvd slot cover is a little broken and oh my god i just wanna fuck him he's so CUTEEEEE

i bet he likes it when i struggle to find the volume slider and just end up caressing his side oughhhhhhhh

[meatsema]

Robot Love 🤖🧡

[jabberwick]

Happy Pride to my little queer objectum freaks out there

[prokopetz]

Robot offers to perform a striptease, then just stands there for several seconds emitting enigmatic whirring noises before an assembly of panels in their torso suddenly retract along previously invisible seams in a hauntingly organic sequence of geometrically precise motions to reveal some sort of Device.

[birdboy-blues]

need a t-shirt that says "I <3 exploring insides" with circuitboard patterning

[xystia]

I’m finally looking at my options for a PC setup now that I have the money saved and ngl it’s like looking at porn

Like ooohhh you’re gonna show me the insides of that mouse? Yeah? Gonna show me how well it scrolls and clicks?

I mean cmon.