Life Is A Circus And I Am The Clown @dark-elf-writes - Tumblr Blog

thiscatdraws

More Of This While I Crawl Out of Artblock (SVSSS edition)

june has arrived

Only day you can rb this

foeofcolor

This post is like a fucking rosetta stone I've had the same theme song tagged in at least 6 languages so far

Low stakes relaxation scenario where as a “friendly game” they decide to play capture the flag but to “even the sides” they decide the flag is Kim Dokja. Meaning he ends up getting carried by most of their allies at some point or another and he is very confused by this but everyone else is very pleased by their hugs.

Yesssss

Uriel and the underworld couple’s help and ABFD and Sun Wukong and a surprising amount of other constellations get in on it

KimCom is competitive as fuck

(Uriel giving Kim Dokja a wing hug. Sun Wukong holding Kim Dokja up with one arm. Jung Heeeon princess carrying Kim Dokja around. Rahhhh. The kids and ABFD. I can’t. My heart)

Look look look

I’m also saying that Hades spends a frankly ridiculous amount of probability and because this is a haha fun time and Not Serious™️ he is allowed to play. He gets to hug his son too.

It’s only at the end. Everyone on all sides other than his wife claims it isn’t fair. He does not care. He has Kim Dokja perched on one of his arms and Persephone laughing as she takes her rightful place on the other.

If he happens to “drop” the boy in Yoo Joonghyuk’s lap then only Persephone knows it was planned. (Everyone knows he did it on purpose but only Persephone and Kim Dokja could and would ever call him out on it.)

#the elf talks #orv

SP commissions a sub scenario for the kids to jump Yoo Joonghyuk the second he puts Kim Dokja down (which they frankly would have done anyways)

Meanwhile Sun Wukong is trying to figure out how to get a scenario going where he can carry around his Maknae. (With the underworld couple’s help. Because they want to hug their son. And also tease and make sure he gets his husband)

SP: I will give you your choice of rare items if you beat Yoo Joonghyuk’s ass the minute he puts Kim Dokja down

The Children, going to do it anyway but raised by Kim Dokja to become grifters in his name: two rare items each and you keep adding zeroes to the coin total until we say stop

SP without hesitation: done.

Nanxnsns

Low stakes relaxation scenario where as a “friendly game” they decide to play capture the flag but to “even the sides” they decide the flag is Kim Dokja. Meaning he ends up getting carried by most of their allies at some point or another and he is very confused by this but everyone else is very pleased by their hugs.

#the elf talks #orv #Kim Dokja: This is humiliating #Persephone: shhhh just let it happen I haven’t gotten to hug my son

Kim Dokja at one point getting carried bridal style by Yoo Joonghyuk and dazed saying “I knew these would be comfortable” and Yoo Joonghyuk looks more fucking smug than anyone has ever fucking seen

SP is chewing glass. That should have been HIM

Meanwhile Sun Wukong is saying he’d be much better at carrying around his Maknae

And Persephone is strolling the flames and Hades is shaking his head but notably not stopping his wife

SP is punching the air okay he is not recovering from this that should be him that should be him he should be living him LI dream by having Kim Dokja all pliant and trusting in his arms

Notably Uriel is not typing.

She passed out. She can’t handle this. Her poor fujo heart cannot contain her delight at not only the bridal carry but hearing one half of her otp tell the other his tits are comfy like she is down for the count and once she comes back everyone’s eardrums will be blown.

Persephone thinks this is hilarious. Mostly because her and her son have the same taste in men. She couldn’t have planned this adoption better honestly. Anyone who has ever seen her next to Hades and has seen how he never once bothers to fully button up a shirt in his wife’s presence knows this is true. But she needs to get her son a husband.

Sun Wukong still thinks he’s clearly the strongest and best looking around. Maknae. Come on now. Look at hyung instead.

#the elf talks #orv

Wait omg

Yoo Joonghyuk seeing SP say this and working even more on his physique because this asshole is trying to steal his husband. Again he cannot lose to this asshole. He won’t. It’s a matter of pride

Lee Hyunsung also starts paying more attention to his physique

Just. Everyone trying to convince Kim Dokja they have the best muscles

Kim Dokja does not realize everyone around him is getting fucking yoked other than like occasionally getting caught staring (again) whenever one of them is going around shirtless (on purpose)

Everyone is drawing straws to figure out who is going to tell Kim Dokja he isn’t straight.

(Kim Dokja at one point getting carried bridal style by Yoo Joonghyuk and dazed saying “I knew these would be comfortable” and Yoo Joonghyuk looks more fucking smug than anyone has ever fucking seen)

#the elf talks #orv

Omg Kim Dokja getting hit with a truth telling effect and Fourth Wall letting it happen as long as nothing important gets spilled is hilarious

(SP, Sun Wukong and ABFD all claim to have a better physique for wildly different reasons)

Kim Dokja: ha the Fourth Wall won’t let me spill anything important

The Fourth Wall: :) correct :)

Kim Dokja: … Why do I feel threatened

*smash cut to him becoming an unskippable cutscene about why Yoo Joonghyuk is objectively the most attractive man in existence and why it’s perfectly normal to want to kiss him and maybe also motorboat him*

(A statement made even funnier when one of them, technically, has the same physique. Kind of. If he wanted to. SP is the kind of petty that he would make his pecs bigger the moment he realized Kim Dokja was a fit guy though just to say he was the better version.)

#the elf talks #orv

I didn’t believe you and I was so glad I was wrong.

I wanna say I’m offended but looking at my track record I can’t say I blame you

Anyways Han Sooyoung gets to listen to Kim Dokja rave about how Yoo Joonghyuk is objectively the most perfect man to ever exist, he’s the protagonist

(And I know SP and the kkomas are watching him do it too)

Look look look. You really like stabbing me in the heart I don’t know what else to say

Han Sooyoung would be more upset about this but like objectively there is something extremely funny about watching a gay disaster of this magnitude. Like this is a ten car pile up of gay disaster. She cannot look away. And she gets to be at ground fucking zero when it eventually blows up? This is like fucking Christmas actually. This dumbshit nearly killed himself the 16th time falling over his own fucking feet becuase Yoo Joonghyuk flexed and he’s defending it AND CLAIMING TO BE STRAIGHT

This is, objectively, the funniest fucking thing she has ever seen. She needs to be 1000% more drunk to deal with this.

(Not only are they hearing it. The entire channel is hearing it but there is ever chance that so is Yoo Joonghyuk. Kim Dokja is going to be 20 minutes into waxing poetic about how perfect his tits are before pulling out a “he’s right behind me isn’t he” while Han Sooyoung scream laughs in his face)

#the elf talks #orv #the only thing that’s pulled out that night ayyyeee #(Kim Dokja tries to kill himself immediately and has to be tackled)#meanwhile Uriel is SCREAMING #absolutely screaming #just losing her fucking mind #(Kim Dokja was probably hit with a truth telling thing but this is still funny)

https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZP8sYS62r/

It’s not sad this time I promise

I didn’t believe you and I was so glad I was wrong.

Also I can’t believe I haven’t written anything where Kim Dokja walks face first into a wall upon seeing Yoo Joonghyuk’s tits like that’s the exact thing I would find funny.

#the elf talks #orv #Kim Dokja: Of course I fave myself a concussion have you see him??? that’s not gay #Han Sooyoung about to have the best night of her fucking life: It??? isn’t??? please explain?????

teathattast

eXCUSE me who is this cat

onion-souls

(I just needed to highlight this comment because what a deep cut)

andwhatexcellentboiledpotatoes

This is me when you "prev tags" me, btw

I love when I reblog something for one mutual specifically and they reblog it hours later due to like time zone/sleep cycle differences.

Automatic cat feeder just went off 🖤

#the elf talks

My room is a bit too hot and I still have an hour and a half of work and I really want to write but it’s so hard to focus and im having OC thoughts but nothing specific enough to put into words and my fucking meds are still out of stock and

I SHOULD BE ALLOWED TO BLOW THINGS UP WITH MY MIND

#the elf talks