Grandpa Joe's Clam Shack and Clown Emporium

5$ mystery mollusk bucket, listeria incl.

[dumbfucking-mutt]

[livelovelaugh-777]

[segamascott]

they're throwing tomatoes at me but my insatiable appetite coupled with my quick reflexes and wet throat i just keep swallowing them whole #ineffective

[keepbreathingky]

[softwaring]

[modernbaseball]

2 am: bedtime were meant to be broken 😈

7 am: I hope i get in a car accident

[hellenhighwater]

I forgot to eat dinner so I'm having 11 pm corn on the cob. This counts as a meal

... It's possible that I really need to do some grocery shopping

[hellenhighwater]

Okay for those of you living in pitiful ignorance, take a raw ear of corn with the husk on and cut all the way around the base (as pictured: above the point where the husk meets the cob, so that the entire husk is severed but still wrapped around the corn. Do not cut through the cob.) Then, with the husk still on, microwave it for 5-7 minutes. It'll basically steam it inside the husk. Remove from microwave --it will be hot, so use a mitt or a towel--and firmly pull the top of the husk/silk, which should come off easily in one piece, unsheathing a flawless corn on the cob. If it doesn't, you probably need to cut a little higher around the base, so all the leaves are severed. No picking off silk!

[hellenhighwater]

For the nonbelievers (and for me, a second corn)

[hellenhighwater]

This website works so well

[kosmogrl]

we got august this week

[teathattast]

[werewolf-transgenderism]

screenshotting my own post so I can show you the video of this pen. it's fucking SICK but also. Fifty Thousand Five Hundred United States Dollars.

[stay-the-knight]

[byjove]

this cavefish has a concept of the passage of time that no other living animal could fathom

[bluttto]

“Everyone has the same 24h” yeah right buddy say that to cavefish

[aflo]

At the sex shop asking if I can buy a regular sized dildo I can put in my unremarkable asshole but they recognize me as the hero of legend regardless

[princesses-royal-plushi]

Welp, I tried. Back to trying to hilt my one 17" pink tentacle toy, I guess

[aflo]

[senatortedcruz]

Wonderful photo

[beemovieerotica]

[necromancelena]

I'm going to fix everything in the next three hours everyone wish me luck. if i dont then probably ill dig a hole and lie down in it for a bit in the rain/sun/whatever outside looks like these days

[necromancelena]

the hole isnt even that bad

[thegothsuccubus]

Who wants to go to the natural history museum, get a pastry, and then fuck nasty style back home

[sandmandaddy69]

[n0stalgos]

There is not even time for a quick jerk off