DirtOverStone

tromBone me

[dark-miku]

check this out i'm playing bad apple in your imagination

[dark-miku]

reblog to play bad apple on your mutuals

[wordfather]

[freeze frame] yeah thats me. you're probably wondering how i got here. me too. i dont remember anything ever so i need to see this as much as you do [unfreeze frame]

[motherfucker-somewhat-limited]

did laundry and showered today you knowwwww i'm hitting that clean sheets clean jammies clean me trifecta tonight

[motherfucker-somewhat-limited]

bro im bedcelled. im comfypilled. im literally cozymaxxing.

[probablysomethingtm]

​honkpilled shoomaxxer

[motherfucker-somewhat-limited]

straight up "snorkin' it". and by "it" haha, well. let's just say. mimimi

[the-haiku-bot]

straight up “snorkin’ it”.

and by “it” haha, well. let’s

just say. mimimi

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

[so1987-deactivated20230102]

who’s gonna tell tumblr that executive dysfunction is more than Not Doing Things?

[so1987-deactivated20230102]

okay

these are the executive functions. impairment of these functions is executive dysfunction

[dailypattondoodles]

Oh.

OH

[lurlur]

Girl, help. None of my executives are functioning

[the-big-mood]

[victusinveritas]

[razielim]

oh i'm going to misusle and straight up fuckle this knowledge so badly

[adz]

i am a biological machine that turns cold cans of Campbell’s soup into shareholder value and nude selfies

[adz]

>:(

[nouveau-riche-princess]

Has anyone considered using a bottle opener on the rim of a glass? I've outlined some of the benefits below:

Fucks the cup up and ruins it forever

Gets glass everywhere

Breaks the glass incorrigibly

Cuts you through several potential vectors

Let me know when you've had time to review my proposal.

[peachfromcmbyn]

Yeah sorry I can't come into work today. I accidentally heard Primadonna by Marina formerly of and the Diamonds. So I need the day to be a primadonna girl. Yeah it's going to be the whole day.

[nixpunk]

[janmisali]

pick whatever option the person you follow who reblogged this post appears to NOT want you to pick. if you're seeing the original post and not a reblog, pick at random. if it's unclear which option the person whose reblog you're seeing wants you to pick, pester them until they give you a straight answer then do whatever they don't say. reblog at your own risk.

first option

second option

Voting ended onJun 10

[fairycosmos]

theyre saying you have to go to work again tomorrow even though you just went today

[sneefsnorf]

im gods weakest faggot

[crabussy]

i’m gods strongest tranny let’s team up. what if we called ourselves team rocket

[cedar-scars]

im gods most literate cat can i join

[the-problematic-trolley]

I’m a straight up mob boss with a lioness for a pet, you’re all hired.

[pinkfire-chacarera]

my yellow rat and I find this really offensive and problematic

[gg-is-a-loser]

wobbuffet

[gross-boyfae]

Hypnobait who regularly stares blankly into space dissociating for brief stretches of time.

[bathroomcube]

how your 20s feel when you dont know what ur doing

[tall]

[notlikingbestgirl]

Out of Touch

[hustlerose]

Out of Touch Thursday

[arbyscurlyfries666-deactivated2]

OUT OF TOUCH THURSDAY

[snuv]

but im out of my head when you’re not around…

[rockmilkshake]

happy birthday.

[saltwatersweets]

this is the only out of touch thursday you can reblog this

[sarthathrace]

me to the accursed whispering amulet: hey can you speak up please i have an audio processing disorder

[queer-here-and-in-fear]

(via @cuunos)