KIROKAZE
TVSTRANGERTHINGS
gracie abrams
Andulka
we're not kids anymore.
taylor price
$LAYYYTER
Misplaced Lens Cap
I'd rather be in outer space đ¸
@theartofmadeline
Sweet Seals For You, Always
Noah Kahan
Xuebing Du
Today's Document
Sade Olutola
Aqua Utopiaď˝ćľˇăŽĺşă§č¨ćśăç´Ąă
ellievsbear
No title available
No title available
No title available
seen from Malaysia
seen from Vietnam
seen from Brazil
seen from Mauritania
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Malaysia
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
@disasterbijedi
an ode to season 16
odyssey dashboard simulator
đŁââď¸ captain.odysseus
between two choices hereâŚ
scylla
charbydis
to be so honest neither are looking great but sometimes u gotta make tough decisions. nobody tell my crew about this btw
65 notes
⏠crewmate-238-deactivated12109
the sirens are dangerous to YOU. i understand them though. we are holding hands and singing and they're not even eating me
đ§ââď¸ siren.girl.40 Follow
no weâre not
âď¸ 0restes
OP being deactivated really adds something here
đľ demodocus.sings.a.lot Follow
the sirens killed him
đ circe.without.mercy
62,234 notes
𤴠telemakhos.of.ithaka
just fucked up so bad i met queen helen from sparta and called her "helen of troy" in front of her husband who literally spent ten years fighting a war to get her back FROM TROY. about to throw myself into the sea
đ face.that.launched.1000.ships Follow
omg no worries babygirl come back anytime :))) happens to everyone
𤴠telemakhos.of.ithaka
was no one going to tell me helen of troy had a tumblr
𤴠telemakhos.of.ithaka
FUCK i did it again
56,329 notes
⏠crewmate-24-deactivated9823
for real though has anyone seen elpenor
#i could have sworn he was with us when we were at circes??
4 notes
⏠crewmate-438-deactivated5764
dreaming of burger made of helios' cattle rn. mmm
â°ď¸ oracle-at-delphi Follow
it is actually insane that people are reblogging this. do you know how disrespectful this is to helios and to all of the gods?? those are literally sacred cattle, i shouldn't be seeing odysseus' crew blogging about how they want to make them into burgers. it's not funny and it's not a joke.
⏠crewmate-438-deactivated5764
#it was gonna be such a perfect day for a bbq but its stormy all the sudden #:( #oh well i guess we will just eat our burgers inside
20,572 notes
đ antinous420
how long could it possibly take to weave a fucking shroud
đˇ ithaca-fact-checker Follow
fun fact! it can actually take 1,543 years to weave a burial shroud for oneâs father in law, depending on the materials, style, and craftsman!
𤴠telemakhos.of.ithaka
ayyy ithaca fact checker i missed you
đ antinous420
who the hell is running this account
#that has to be a joke right #otherwise that would mean that like only an immortal could weave these #ik athena is goddess of weaving but she cant be the only one doing it #right???
322 notes
đ what.up.its.nausica
not the random naked man i found on my shore who i almost got betrothed to being odysseus king of ithaca are you KIDDING me
đ pisistratus-son-of-nestor
i thought he was dead???
đŁââď¸ captain.odysseus
im not
đ pisistratus-son-of-nestor
@ telemakhos.of.ithaca @ queen-penelope-official HELLO???
23,753 notes
đ circe.without.mercy
actually disgusting that people are still following @/calyps0 when she literally kept odysseus captive on her island for seven years. yes odysseus is incredibly problematic and he should be held accountable for actions. yes i dont support what he did to polyphemus and i will block anyone who said that was deserved. but he literally has a wife and son he needs to get back to and it's disgusting that she tried to impede him like this
đď¸ calyps0 Follow
hey what was going on when he stayed at your place for a year
đď¸ calyps0 Follow
lmfao she blocked me
#girl this situation is messyyyy
16,422 notes
đŚ goddess-of-wisdom
why is everyone so mad at odysseus. heâs just a silly little guy. my silly little mortal. he does tricks. free him
đą earthshaker Follow
he blinded my son
đŚ goddess-of-wisdom
ok??? have you considered that maybe your son was being a little bitch
45,890 notes
đŁââď¸ captain.odysseus
lmfaoooo ive been sending anon hate to polyphemus and he still doesnât know it was me, odysseus, son of laertes sacker of cities king of ithaca who lives at ithaca palace and is currently sailing home on the aegean sea. click the read more to track my voyage home
Read more
#what are you gonna do about it big guy #nobody cares
5,738 notes
đď¸pol.y.phe.mus Follow
when i find whoever it is that is sending me these you are going to be so sorry
3 notes
đ queen-penelope-official
like this post if you want to be included in the archery contest tomorrow!
#may the best shot win!
108 likes
đ˝ď¸ suitor-37
anyone noticed the quality of penelopeâs wines at ithaca palace has kind of sucked lately
đśď¸ ordinary.beggar.dont.worry Follow
i have a strong feeling that you wonât have to worry about this for much longer :)
17 notes
If ur in the epic discord you've seen this dumb thing already but here it is again
Finished making my new phone background. Dimensions are for iphone SE3
One tragic aspect of the Odyssey that I've never really seen handled by any adaptation is the link between Odysseus' marriage and the Trojan War itself.
When Helen was of age to be married, all the Lords of Greece came to seek her hand. This was an issue for her stepfather the King of Sparta who could only pick one husband and then would have to deal with the far greater number of angry rejected suitors.
One suitor was Odysseus, then a younger man. He quickly ascertained that he had no chance of marrying Helen. Ithaca was too poor for him to even bring any proper gifts, let alone a dowry. But he did catch the eye of the King's niece, one Penelope.
Now Penelope was still a bit out of Odysseus' league, but not so much as Helen was. So he makes a deal with the King of Sparta. Support my bid to marry Penelope, and I'll give you a solution to this suitors problem. The King agrees, so Odysseus suggests all the suitors swear an oath to defend Helen's marriage from anyone who might strike against it. They all, including Odysseus, so swear, and Helen is married to Menelaus. The King proves as good as his word, and Penelope is wed to Odysseus.
Of course this means that Odysseus has now bound himself to fight for Helen and Menelaus. After an attempt to feign madness he is forced to fulfill his duty.
So his own plan, to marry Penelope and stop a hoard of ravenous suitors, ends with him forced to defend his own marriage from a hoard of ravenous suitors.
"You hear that? They're saying The Odyssey doesn't even have nobody!"
"They've got nobody in the Odyssey?"
"No I'm saying they don't got nobody."
"Nobody's there?"
"Nobody's not there!"
"So everyone's there?"
"Everybody but nobody!"
the odyssey (2026)
This one goes out to the anon competing at the International Barbershop Harmony convention! I think Grace is smart enough to put that card together pretty quickly. Eridian Welcoming Committee courtesy of @justcakethanks
Ryland Grace, seconds before losing consciousness: did--did you just reference Parks and Rec
Your partner came back from the dead after being missing for decades. Every one of their friends who they went with ended up dying a horrible death.
Now, somehow, their entire mental health is based on the continued life and happiness of this fairground goldfish that they picked up.
Neither of you know the first thing about how to care for even a healthy fish. This fish has been poorly cared for, has multiple diseases and the person who handed it over explicitly didn't expect it to live nearly as long as it already has.
You're frantically googling how to set up a fish tank, where to buy fish food, can you even take a fish to the vet? Your partner wants you to know that they're happy they made it home and survived their horrific ordeal, but also that if anything happens to the fish then they're going to kill everyone on this planet and then themself.
You're honestly wondering if you're even helping the fish, or just prolonging its suffering, but your partner will only accept medical help for their many injuries or engage in basic self-care once they're confident that the fish is being looked after.
So you get a tank. You set up a filter and all that stuff. You learn way more than you ever wanted to know about water temperature and ph and nitrate levels. The fish is safe. You start to develop some affection for the little guy. Your partner begins to recover. The fish begins to recover.
Which is when you learn that in its 'healthy' state, the fish regularly refuses to sleep when tired, keeps begging for food that is obviously unhealthy for it (and struggling to eat the food that you do provide because âit tastes grossâ), and continually tries to persuade your partner to take it out of its nice safe tank so it can go explore the wonderful world of Outside, where the slightest mishap will kill it instantly.
Your name is Adrian, and you kind of wants to strangle this fucking fish, statement.
lovestruck
you know what fucking kills me? all major historical events that happened in our universe (the supposed new universe) also happened in the original universe.
we know that covid happened because the lockdowns were the reason Maggie was behind on rent (+ the whole lockdown audio bit, if you want to treat that as canon). the French Revolution, WW2, the Spanish Inquisition, climate change all happened. Shakespeare, Queen, the Velvet Underground, Shostakovich and David Bowie happened. hell, even on a much smaller-stakes scale, our version of the M25 still looks like Crowley's version.
the universe still worked out the same exact way. what was the point of their sacrifice then? no more cosmic meddling? we've ended up with the same exact thing anyway, so either Heaven and Hell were never that important because it's all humanity's doing (oh hello Book Omens/S1) , or the universe is just so inert that the whole "once you get rid of God you gain free will" thing is just blatantly Not True
"but humanity is now free to exist without the influences from Heaven or Hell!!!" yeah and everything still worked out the same way so ultimately Heaven and Hell never had much of a hand in anything
"but humanity being in control is very Pratchett!!!" yes, but killing the whole universe just to prove that point isn't. the death of 8 billion people was just a device to prove that humanity is capable of both beauty and horror? "sin, young man, is when you treat people like things."
I dunno man, this ending is fucking bleak
Downtime
the eridians have this beautiful, transcendant concept called the thrum where they come together to form a hive mind in order to discuss scholarly pursuits and solve their peoples greatest issues which resulted in them building a space ship to save their planet
and the human race has eva stratt with her two cups of coffee
itâs kinda funny bc the videos of grace hanging out w rocky is the happiest eva stratt had ever seen him. like imagine guilts been haunting you and the laws been hunting you and for decades you have no idea if itâs been all for nothing and thenâŚ.. first clip you see is the scientist and a sentient rock going âthis is me and my BOI âď¸â
you learn something new everyday. unless you're a historian. then you learn something old
I see your âRocky swears like a sailor but only in pitches humans canât hear/refuses to teach Grace what those words meanâ and raise you âRocky swears like a sailor and now has to explain to Grace that âbad bad badâ isnât actually a sequence you play on your Eridian speech piano in polite company.â
Grace is both horrified and amused to realise that a more accurate translation for what Rockyâs been saying is âshit shit shitâ.
Eridian government representative: Greetings Rocky, Saviour of Erid, and Grace, Saviour from Beyond the Stars. We are pleased to welcome you home.
Grace, haltingly on the keyboard Rocky built for him: Wassup bitches. Fucking jazzed toâ
Rocky: GRACE STOP TALKING NOW NOW NOW I EXPLAIN LATER
