The Only Jealousy of Emer
"... Cú Chulaind slept with Fand, then, and he stayed with her for a month. When he bade her farewell, she said to him ‘Where will we meet?’ They decided upon Ibor Cind Tráchta. This was told to Emer, and she prepared knives with which to kill Fand. Fifty women accompanied Emer to the place of the meeting. Cú Chulaind and Lóeg were playing fidchell and did not notice the advancing women, but Fand noticed, and she said to Lóeg ‘Look over at what I am seeing.’ ‘What is it?’ asked Lóeg, and he looked.
Fand then said ‘Lóeg, look behind you. Listening to you is a troop of clever, capable women, glittering sharp knives in their right hands and gold on their breasts. When warriors go to their battle chariots, a fair form will be seen: Emer daughter of Forgall in a new guise.’
‘Have no fear,’ replied Cú Chulaind, ‘for she will not come at all. Step up into my powerful chariot, with its sunny seat, and I will protect you from every woman in the four quarters of Ériu, for though the daughter of Forgall may boast to her companions about her mighty deeds, she is not likely to challenge me.’ He said to Emer, then, ‘I avoid you, woman, as every man avoids the one he loves. I will not strike your hard spear, held with trembling hand; neither do you threaten me with your thin, feeble knife and weak, restrained anger, for the strength of women is insufficient to demand my full power.’
‘Why, then, Cú Chulaind, have you dishonoured me before the women of the province and the women of Ériu and all people of rank?’ asked Emer. ‘It is under your protection I have come, under the great power of your guarantee; and though the pride of mighty conflicts makes you boastful, perhaps your attempt to leave me will fail, lad, however much you try.’
‘Emer, why will you not permit me to meet this woman?’ replied Cú Chulaind. ‘She is pure and modest, fair and clever and worthy of a king. A handsome sight she is on the waves of the great-tided sea, with her shapeliness and beauty and noble family, her embroidery and handiwork, her good sense and prudence and steadfastness, her abundance of horses and herds of cattle. Whatever you may promise, there is nothing under heaven her husband could desire that she would not do. Neither will you find a handsome, combat-scarred, battle-victorious champion to equal me.’
‘Perhaps this woman you have chosen is no better than I,’ answered Emer. ‘But what’s red is beautiful, what’s new is bright, what’s tall is fair, what’s familiar is stale. The unknown is honoured, the known is neglected -- until all is known. Lad, we lived together in harmony once, and we could do so again if only I still pleased you.’
Cú Chulaind grew melancholy at this, and he said ‘By my word, you do please me, and you will as long as you live.’ ‘Leave me, then,’ said Fand. ‘Better to leave me,’ sajd Emer. ‘No, I should be left,’ said Fand, ‘for it is I who was threatened just now.’ And she began to cry and grieve, for being abandoned was shameful to her; she went to her house, and the great love she bore Cú Chulaind troubled her, and she recited this poem:
I will continue my journey
though I prefer my great adventure here;
whoever might come, great his fame,
I would prefer to remain with Cú Chulaind.
I would prefer to remain here --
that I grant willingly --
than to go, it may surprise you to learn,
to the sun-house of Áed Abrat.
Emer, the man is yours,
and may you enjoy him, good woman.
What my hand cannot obtain
I must still desire.
Many a man has sought me,
both openly and in secret;
yet I never went to meet them,
for I was upright.
Wretched she who gives her love
if he takes no notice of her;
better to put such thoughts aside
unless she is loved as she loves.
Fifty women came here,
Emer of the yellow hair,
to fall upon Fand -- a bad idea --
and kill her in her misery.
But I have three fifties of women,
beautiful and unmarried, at home
with me in my fort --
they would not desert me.
When Manandán learned that Fand was in danger from the women of Ulaid and that she was being forsaken by Cú Chulaind, he came west after her and stood before her, and no one but Fand could see him. When she perceived him, Fand felt deep regret and sadness, and she recited this poem:
See the warlike son of Ler
on the plains of Éogan Indber:
Manandán, lord of the world --
once I held him dear.
Then, I would have wepr,
but my proud spirit does not love now --
love is a vain thing
that goes about heedlessly and foolishly.
When Manandán and I lived
in the sun-house at Dún Indber,
we bough thought it likely
we would never separate.
When fair Manandán married me,
I was a proper wife:
he never won from me
the odd game of fidchell.
When fair Manandán married me,
I was a proper wife:
a bracelet of gold he gave me,
the price of making me blush.
Outside on the heath I had
fifty beautiful women;
I gave him fifty men
in addition to the fifty women.
Across the ocean I see
(and he who does not is a fool)
the horseman of the foaming sea,
he who does not follow the long ships.
Your going past us now
none but the Síde might perceive;
your keen sight magnifies the tiniest host,
though it be far distant.
That keen sight might be useful to me,
for the senses of women are foolish:
the one whom I loved so completely
has put me in danger here.
Farewell to you, dear Cú!
I leave you with head held high.
I wish that I were not going --
every rule is good until broken.
Time for me to set out, now --
there is someone who finds that difficult.
My distress is great,
O Lóeg, O son of Ríangabur.
I will go with my own husband, now,
for he will not deny me.
Lest you say I left in secret,
look now, if you wish. ...”
From “The Wasting Sickness of Cú Chulaind, or the Only Jealousy of Emer”, the oldest version of which can be found in the Book of the Dun Cow, which was made in the 12th Century. A portion of the text has been dated through linguistic pointers to the 9th Century and another to the 11th, indicating that at least two sources had been known to the scribes.
Translation by Jeffrey Gantz. Penguin Classics’ Early Irish Myths and Sagas.
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