I absolutely love children
I’m the hotdog girl
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tumblr dot com
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸
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@theartofmadeline
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
cherry valley forever
Cosmic Funnies
The Bowery Presents
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EXPECTATIONS
One Nice Bug Per Day
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#extradirty
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blake kathryn
Noah Kahan
occasionally subtle
seen from Mexico

seen from Malaysia
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seen from Malaysia

seen from Germany
seen from Singapore
seen from T1
seen from Colombia
seen from T1
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seen from Sweden
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@doge-banana
I absolutely love children
I’m the hotdog girl
Don’t drink and drive your dog won’t understand why you never came home
friend: awww, who's a good sinner? who's a good sinner?
me: ??????????????????????????????
friend: its you!
me: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I HAVE NO WORDS
(ALSO this seems to be the op, on youtube)
Omfg the way the truck fucked up, fucked up perfectly
I am in tears omg
I ONLY JUST TURNED ON THE AUDIO AND OMG BEST DECISION EVEN THO I RBD LIKE 5 TIMES BEOFRE NOW
Yes it’s back on my dash!!!
Omg the audio
Find your name with the gif button and add the one that is the most relatable
so the thing about my family is that we have two ancestors on my dad’s side who were buried in france, where I currently live. one died in the spanish civil war, and one died prior doing…we don’t know what. but he somehow managed to get buried in père lachaise.
so anyhow, my gran sends me a message like “pls put flowers on ur uncle samuel’s grave because he’s gone over a century with none and it will make the ghost mad if he hasn’t already” because my family spends time in europe but never long enough to go all the way to père lachaise and give ya boy samuel jr. his death rites. so im like “ok gran I can do that” bc im a good grandson and you do not fuck with gran she doesn’t DESERVE THAT
i figure out which plot he’s on and ask someone specifically where you can find uncle samuel jr. and they tell me where and so I arrive at the junction and.
HE GONE.
WHERE DID YOU GO UNCLE SAMUEL.
*celine dion’s smash hit “my heart will go on” playing in the distance*
in other words either someone stole my entire great great uncle samuel or he has risen again, ready to party in paris for all of eternity.
You’re pretty chill about a corpse disappearing.
My guy, my dude, he’s been dead since 1851. He could be anywhere. He does what he wants.
current aesthetic: cute english teacher who’s high key banging the history professor
current aesthetic: the history professor
current aesthetic: the history professor’s substitute who joins in on the action.
current aesthetic: the principal who really wants to get in on this sexyfest, but also doesn’t want this whole thing to blow up in his face.
aesthetic: the librarian who nearly exposes the whole affair before joining in.
aesthetic: The bookish guidance counselor who thinks you all need Jesus.
Aesthetic: the law student in his dorm across campus who can hear everything.
Every time I see this it has different characters I love this post
proof i am a grandpa
- hates kids - full of useless information - everything hurts - ready for death
How I want my bank account to look like by 25.
Claiming it.
Waaaaay up 🙏🏾
11:11am on the receipt.
Reblog for prosperity, and success. May you always have what you need.
That’s what I’m saying
In other words, this is the ATM receipt, reblog and money will come your way.
Doesn’t hurt to try.
did I ever mention that I know someone whose family owned a zombie dog because that’s some real shit that I get to delight with at parties
Tell us that story?
okay here is the story of the zombie dog
this dog’s name was John. they found him half drowned in a bag of puppies that were not so fortunate as he was, and was taken in immediately. he was a runt and not quite right (most likely from the whole half drowned thing), but a very loving dog. the problem with John was that he smelled like death, and no one knew why. vets couldn’t figure it out. it was obviously some kind of skin problem, but they had no idea what kind. all anyone knew was that if you touched him, you would smell like death too, so you couldn’t pet him, and that for some reason, the only thing that made the smell go away was being around other dogs. so they got another dog and the death smell stopped and John lived a very happy life
when he was getting old, maybe about 15 years, part of his skull caved in. just like that! suddenly had a huge dent in his head! and he was totally fine. didn’t notice it, didn’t affect him at all. just this massive dent right there in his head where his skull had collapsed in on his brain, and he was still the happiest and most loving dog. the skull cave in, for whatever reason, caused the ear on that side of his head to just fall off entirely, but again, perfectly happy dog who did not know he was down an ear and a fully formed skull. they took him to the vet, thinking maybe they should put him down. I mean, wouldn’t you think so? but the vet said that the dog was eating, and pooping, and happy, so there was no reason to put him down, so they didn’t
but that’s not even the weird part. the weird part is the area of the brain that got caved in on was apparently the area that registers pain, so this one-eared, collapsed skull dog could no longer feel any pain. he got old, his joints got stiff, his teeth rotted out of his head, his tongue hung out of his mouth and got black and hard, and he felt none of it! in fact, he was happier than he’d ever been feeling no pain, and the fact that he didn’t feel how much he was falling apart somehow made him live until he was 23. that’s right, the collapsed skull, one eared, zero teeth, smells like literal death when alone dog lived to be 23 years old. they used to joke that he’d been dead for years, but was too stupid to realize it yet
and that’s the story about the literal zombie dog my friend’s family owned
this was the wildest fucking story i have ever read on this entire site
emo stands for eat me out
Name one person who jacks off more than me
this guy
I said a PERSON, not a legend
is he okay?
hello darkness my old friend
i found the video
source
Are you shitting me?
he keeps getting trapped
free him