finally coming home

Frankie | she/they | documenting my journey as converting to Judaism!

[jessicadmj]

this is so fucking funny

[momowho34]

Christians (specifically Protestants): we have little versions of our sacred text that we carry around in our pockets to pull out if we encounter something and want guidance. The version used during sermons and in church are the same ones that we carry with us

Jews: you can read the torah and Tanakh in a normal book if you want. But if you want a torah you can use as a congregation? *cracks knuckles* you must prepare paper made from the skin of a kosher animal and special ink and a quill made from a turkey feather and you must use no metal in the preparation process because metal is used in the creation of weapons for war and before you even think about actually started to write you must take The Holy Bath to purify yourself and ritually blot out the name of Amalek, the sworn enemy of the Jewish people and every time you write the name of god on the scroll you must say it out loud and recite a special prayer and if you mess up one letter you have to start over and when the scroll is finished you must wrap it in tapestries and pretty cloth and shit and then put little crowns on the end and then put it in a Super Special Box in the synagogue so every time it’s time to read it you can open the Super Special Box and everyone can gawk at the Ultra Big Boy Important Text and the words of god within the scroll. this entire process takes about a year to complete and is done by special sofer’s that devote their lives to making Torah’s specifically and when you read from the torah you must use a little tiny pointer in the shape of a hand so your hands don’t mess up the paper. Oh, you think I kid? You think I jest?

Think again.

(rb encouraged for everyone. Share the sacred baby hands with the goyim. Everyone deserves to know about the sacred baby hands)

[witchofeindor]

Hebrew: 'This one verb is used to mean 10 different things, I'm an economical language like that, good luck figuring out what this verb means each time'

Also Hebrew: *Has about 8 different words meaning 'lion'*

[essekknits]

I feel like every single person deserves to read OP’s tags cause fuck they are accurate.

Also like...

Hebrew: every single word is heavily gendered and there are Very Strict Rules for gendering every word and number and shit

Also Hebrew: these words SOUND like they’re female words, you will gender them like female words, and you will be WRONG.

Also also Hebrew: except for knives and the sun. These two can be whatever gender you like. And everyone will argue because they’re sure only their gendering is right.

[kyraneko]

I read “lingshaming” as “lionshaming” at first and lol. mood.

[progressivejudaism]

“I try to walk the road of Judaism. Embedded in that road there are many jewels. One is marked “Shabbat” and one “Civil Rights” and one “keeping Kosher” and one “Honor Your Parents” and one “Study of Torah” and one “You Shall be Holy.” There are at least 613 of them and they are of different shapes and sizes and weights. Some are light and easy for me to pick up, and I pick them up. Some are too deeply embossed for me, so far at least though I get a little stronger b trying to extricate the jewels as I walk the street. Some, perhaps, I shall never be able to pick up. I believe that God expects me to keep on walking Judaism Street and to carry away whatever I can of its commandments. I do not believe that God expects me to lift what I cannot, nor may I condemn my fellow Jew who may not be able to pick up even as much as I can.”

— Adapted from Rabbi Arnold Jacob Wolf, Mishkahn haNefesh for Rosh Hashanah, 159

[yidquotes]

Do not side with the majority to do wrong. - Shmot 23:2

[hiddurmitzvah]

Micrographic sukkah decoration by Israel David Luzzatto (1746 - 1806)

[gayrazacrew-deactivated20251030]

Happy Passover to everyone at the Suez Canal haha

[b0gchamp-deactivated20230613]

PANDEMIC PESACH V.2 IS HERE BABY

[hametronit-deactivated20240806]

Quarantine mode:

> easy

> medium

> hard (no bread)

[trekkienatural]

*ahem*

[called-by-the-shekinah]

Something I love about Judaism:

I try to do morning blessings and prayers and such every day; and it really hit me that the morning blessings center around gratitude

Modeh Ani? I woke up today. I have a new day to live. I am thankful

Elohai Neshama? The soul that I possess, that I have been gifted with, is pure. And I am grateful for that

Asher Yatzar? My body is functioning (well... for the most part), and I should be mindful of this blessing

I really like that Judaism centers on the idea of cultivating gratitude.

[girlactionfigure]

[zemestoun]

[doitforhashem]

milly was determined to do some davening with me this morning...

shabbat shalom!!

[doitforhashem]

cat purim sameach!!!

[homosandhomies]

Jews: On Passover we celebrate our escape from slavery, but that does not mean we celebrate Pharaoh's death. That would make us as cruel as he was.

Also Jews: happy purim haman's fucking dead let's celebrate by making cookies shaped like his dumb hat for a gazillion years and use noisemakers and scream every time someone says his name lol

[mothman-dontpullout]

jewish holidays as memes

yom kippur

chanukah

sukkot

purim

feel free to add