Dorian Bleu

Some content is 18+, interactions 18+ only • he/him • queer • gainer • I love my body, don't be mean • pfp is stock photo • late 20s • in a monogamous relationship

[rosebelliedbunting]

Stuck in bed (i mean literally stuck, even rolling over is excruciating) and frankly in a lot of pain. so im dealing with the anxiety of “what if this lasts forever” (it won’t) by once again pretending in my head that actually I’m stuck for Gigantically Fat reasons & that any second now my love will come help me turn over and bring me something yummy to snack on

[rosebelliedbunting]

this is why i do not respect the half-measure feedist acceptance of like, no health play/immobility/death feedism. (Not as in Everyone Has To Like These, but as in, non-feedists and even feedists who don’t accept that part of our scene.) like, I don’t have this thought fully formed but it’s. You want to disavow that kind of feedism (or whtever it is you’ve decided is Too Icky) for being “intentionally disabling yourself” and it’s like, what if I’m already fuckin disabled my dude. what if i already have heart palpitations when i go up stairs and it has nothing to do with my size. what if a power chair is already in my future. like does it not reasonably follow, that if a fat person can love the current state of their body or perhaps even aspire to have more of the socially degraded trait (fatness), that i as a fat disabled person can love the ways i am already fat and disabled and perhaps aspire to more fatness and more disability. I get that that’s not a common outlook okay! but i promise you people feel the same way about others wanting to be fat! if you can reject one societal expectation you can reject another!!

[dorianbleu]

This is really similar to how I look at it! I already use a mobility aid, need to sit/lie down more than I want to, and need to eat food. But what if that was for reasons I wanted and thought were hot? What if, while my body is in such levels of pain and discomfort, I got to enjoy the feeling of being soft and heavy? Not to mention that I (and a lot of others with my condition) have seen my symptoms improve the more weight I gain. Getting stuck in a doorway because it's inaccessible & too narrow for me to pass with my rollator? Fuck that, lemme get stuck because my ass is too wide

[fatliberation]

I don’t have time to unpack my full thoughts on the whole argument of ‘you shouldn’t be a burden to the healthcare system’ but I would like to chime in on it:

so, all athletes should immediately stop playing sports. construction workers, anyone with jobs that put them at risk, they need to find different employment. people with uteruses shouldn’t ever get pregnant, either. actually you know what? don’t enter a car or vehicle at all! and don’t even get me started on old people. what age do we think they should just give it up & throw in the towel? 50? 60? after that they become way too burdensome. it’s a problem.

sweet baby eugenicist, your anger is misplaced. they want you to blame yourself instead of their crumbling system. you should be asking, what kind of a fucking healthcare system is it if it can be burdened by the very thing it exists to provide? which is healthcare?!

[embellyished]

Ok, hear me out

Feeders with praise kinks.

Especially when you get on top, pin them down, and tell them that they're such a good enabler, and they're doing such a good job in making you so very very fat, and it makes them so flustered they turn bright red.

[dorianbleu]

I would love some tips on how fluster a feeder with a praise kink, if anybody's willing to share

[thaenad]

@fatliberation has been terminated by tumblr staff.

I did not hit the self-destruct button! I was silenced! I’m officially an INTERNET FUGITIVE! this is my initial post just getting the word out, sorry if it’s a bit rushed and panicky - I’m trying not to get too worked up over it and just get this out there as efficiently as possible, but I’m the user behind @fatliberation. I am posting this from my feed1sm community blog, which was initially a safe haven for me to reach directly to the feed1st community without the scrutiny of non-feed1sts. luckily, it was not attached to the account that got terminated. go figure! I’ve sent an appeal request to tumblr, but I am doubtful that my blog will be reinstated because feed1sm is officially against tumblr’s community guidelines. yes, this is discrimination. here’s why feed1sm is not a fucking eating disorder.

obviously, I’m in extreme distress over this, because I did not have any of my work backed up. I’m devastated to have lost the hundreds of asks sitting in my inbox, the lists of resources I’ve compiled, and the six years worth of work in the form of replies and essays.

I know that much of my work is still out there on each of your individual blogs as reblogs. I might eventually try to organize a combing operation for specific posts so that some of it can be saved.

I don’t know where I’m going from here, but I will send updates from this blog. I will most likely make my own website with a domain that I own, but it will take me awhile. as many of you know, I’ve worked through a brick wall of deep-rooted shame to get to this point, so my blog being terminated on the account of promoting a culture of harm has caused my brain to backslide into shame-land. I’m experiencing anxiety and doubts about my character that haven’t come up in years. this termination happened during a time where I was taking a break from posting because my mental health was already on unstable ground. so it all kind of came crashing in on me. I’m okay. my friends are here for me. I know that it will take me a minute to get back up from this, but I am not going anywhere.

THEY CAN’T KEEP THIS BAD FATTY DOWN!

🐋✊⛓️‍💥

If you’re reading this, please spread this post around so my people can find me. my ko-fi account still lives.

I hope that even though much of it has been lost, the footprint it left will live on. running that blog has changed my life in immeasurable ways. getting to interact and learn from you all brought me community, acceptance, and love. I cannot express my gratitude to everyone who has supported me, and who stood behind me when I became vocal about feed1sm. you mean the world to me. I refuse to be silenced. my only ask is that you please keep spreading and circulating the fat liberation flag.

so. I’m wiping my tears and trying to think of this as rebirth. wherever I go from here, I won’t have to worry about censorship. when I got the news that it was all gone, the first thing that came to mind was this scene from pixar’s up.

In the end, it’s just a blog.

In liberation,

@fatliberation

[thaenad]

@fatliberation has been terminated by tumblr staff.

I did not hit the self-destruct button! I was silenced! I’m officially an INTERNET FUGITIVE! this is my initial post just getting the word out, sorry if it’s a bit rushed and panicky - I’m trying not to get too worked up over it and just get this out there as efficiently as possible, but I’m the user behind @fatliberation. I am posting this from my feed1sm community blog, which was initially a safe haven for me to reach directly to the feed1st community without the scrutiny of non-feed1sts. luckily, it was not attached to the account that got terminated. go figure! I’ve sent an appeal request to tumblr, but I am doubtful that my blog will be reinstated because feed1sm is officially against tumblr’s community guidelines. yes, this is discrimination. here’s why feed1sm is not a fucking eating disorder.

obviously, I’m in extreme distress over this, because I did not have any of my work backed up. I’m devastated to have lost the hundreds of asks sitting in my inbox, the lists of resources I’ve compiled, and the six years worth of work in the form of replies and essays.

I know that much of my work is still out there on each of your individual blogs as reblogs. I might eventually try to organize a combing operation for specific posts so that some of it can be saved.

I don’t know where I’m going from here, but I will send updates from this blog. I will most likely make my own website with a domain that I own, but it will take me awhile. as many of you know, I’ve worked through a brick wall of deep-rooted shame to get to this point, so my blog being terminated on the account of promoting a culture of harm has caused my brain to backslide into shame-land. I’m experiencing anxiety and doubts about my character that haven’t come up in years. this termination happened during a time where I was taking a break from posting because my mental health was already on unstable ground. so it all kind of came crashing in on me. I’m okay. my friends are here for me. I know that it will take me a minute to get back up from this, but I am not going anywhere.

THEY CAN’T KEEP THIS BAD FATTY DOWN!

🐋✊⛓️‍💥

If you’re reading this, please spread this post around so my people can find me. my ko-fi account still lives.

I hope that even though much of it has been lost, the footprint it left will live on. running that blog has changed my life in immeasurable ways. getting to interact and learn from you all brought me community, acceptance, and love. I cannot express my gratitude to everyone who has supported me, and who stood behind me when I became vocal about feed1sm. you mean the world to me. I refuse to be silenced. my only ask is that you please keep spreading and circulating the fat liberation flag.

so. I’m wiping my tears and trying to think of this as rebirth. wherever I go from here, I won’t have to worry about censorship. when I got the news that it was all gone, the first thing that came to mind was this scene from pixar’s up.

In the end, it’s just a blog.

In liberation,

@fatliberation

[hunnybunspen]

The Fatter Tracker

[dorianbleu]

New profile picture

[doublequaterpounder]

Isn’t it crazy how normalised the depersonalisation of food has become like it’s a sign of very late stage capitalism. With the rise of food delivery apps like food can just appear at your house ready without interacting with a single human

Like I mean food is such a shared human experience it’s sad to see it that aspect vanish like I mean you still used to have to call pizza places and stuff to place an order but now we got “leave at door” culture. Even the touch screens at fast food places are a bit much.

I feel like it inherently adds to the aspect of shame around food like if you eat you should be hiding from others, your order should be a secret and solo experience.

I really don’t know if this makes sense but like it’s sad that the ritual of ordering food is being buried in a culture of shame and telling us as consumers something to hide

But like I wanna tell people how much I’m ordering and owning that yeah this is how much I want and this is how much I’ll eat and that’s ok

[dorianbleu]

This hits extra hard for me as a disabled person with a high risk for disease complications. I use "leave at door" and delivery to keep myself safe from environments that could kill me or make my disability permanently worse, but that also shuts me out of seeing people and accessing community. I miss the days before my disability got really bad & we ended up in a pandemic when I could answer a question from the mom with her two little kids next to me in the grocery store about how to easily shop for garlic in family portions without it going bad first, or get to talk to the server bringing me my food about how wild the night shift is, or send my compliments to a chef for a beautifully cooked plate. I want to go to the farmer's market and talk to a local farmer about the best type of apples at this point in the year. I want to sit around a table with my friends and share a good meal.

Instead, because the rich decided we aren't profitable & not worth investing in, it's not safe for me to be in public. People don't see people like me, because we have to protect ourselves, and so they don't think of us.

The food I eat is hidden, I am hidden, and the world is hidden from me. My kingdom for a disability accessible world

[quiet-admirer]

What can we say instead of “it’s okay to lose weight?”

Okay, we’ve all seen the hate gainers sometimes get if they announce that they’ve decided to lose weight. And for every hate message, there’s always the handful of comments with some variation of “good on you for choosing to do what you want with your body. I support you no matter what! It’s okay to lose weight!”

But ~hold on~ – outside of kink spaces, we know that congratulating someone on losing weight perpetuates the false idea that intentional weight loss is always healthy, encourages people with eating disorders to normalize and continue their disordered behaviors, and reinforces the dominant messaging that wanting a smaller body is something to be congratulated no matter what.

At the same time, we really care about the gainers in our community and don't want to just stand by when we see harmful and abusive comments. So what are some things we could say instead to counter those voices giving them shit for deciding to stop gaining?

To the shitty anons:

“We don’t police people’s bodies in this community.”

“Everyone belongs in our community as long as they respect others’ boundaries, consent, and autonomy.”

“That’s pretty entitled to tell someone they have to do something just because it’s your kink.”

“Mind your own fucking business.”

"lmao you think people have to be constantly gaining to be gainers?? mid"

To a partner or friend:

“I care about you no matter what your body size is.”

"I'm here for you if you want to talk more about how you've been feeling about (gaining/this kink/body image stuff/health stuff/etc.)."

Especially if they’ve disclosed to you they have a history of disordered eating: “Thank you for telling me. To be honest though, it makes me worry because I know you’ve struggled with staying in a mentally and physically healthy place when you’ve tried to lose weight in the past. What are your thoughts about that?”

To an acquaintance or stranger on the internet:

Nothing!

It is actually entirely possible and fine to say nothing!

Just like when your aunt talks about a new fad diet she’s trying, you can do the online equivalent of nodding politely and giving a good ole noncommittal “hm” before changing the subject, which is to not comment at all just keep on scrolling.

Weight loss announcements don't need to be fed any kind of attention, especially when you don’t have any background on the baggage that might be associated with weight loss for an acquaintance or stranger on the internet! And the internet stranger may not even need or want your personal intervention to defend their weight loss.

TLDR; there is no reason to encourage and praise weight loss in any spaces, and that includes fat- and food-related kink spaces. Anything we are trying to say by verbally congratulating a gainer on their weight loss announcement can be said more precisely and with less risk of harm when weight loss is not mentioned at all.

[thatfatgoth]

And if I said this was how I felt every time I saw a “It’s okay to lose weight: Feedism edition” post. When this is literally like the only space where fat people don’t have to hear about weight loss 24/7 what then?

[stonedffa-deactivated20251212]

No, no I did not.

[hungrysapphic]

For anyone wondering why this distinction is important, the word "feederism" centers the feeder's experience which can play into misconceptions about weight gain kink being nonconsensual or exploitative. "Feedism" emphasizes the act of feeding itself and conveys more of a balanced and mutual dynamic between feeder and feedee. Plus it rolls (😉) off the tongue way easier!

[dumbgothcow]

can we stop recommending boosts? idk about y'all but im not trying to have 700% of my daily dose of copper y'know

[hecatelund]

For real, blasting your guts with that amount of vitamins and minerals for the calories you get isn’t great for you. Plus the high calorie one is ~530cals, that’s about one burger or half a pint of cream. Like if you’re doing it for calories, you can drink a pint of heavy cream or ice cream and get twice as much out of it. If you’re doing it bc you like eating, a cantina burrito from Taco Bell or a basic whopper are both over 600 cals. All of those taste better (except maybe heavy cream) and offer better caloric bang for your buck than Boosts.

[dorianbleu]

And Boost is owned by Nestle, which is a monstrously exploitative company

[thatfatgoth]

Nothing grosses me out more than a feeder dressing their obvious fatphobia up in the guise of “My fat partner absolutely must be healthy” it makes me so uncomfortable and as someone with a chronic illness it even makes me feel slightly unwelcome in this community. Like thin people get sick or disabled too you all know that right? And that likelihood only increases as we age. Are you gonna leave this person you supposedly love if they become unwell? That’s wild! Like even normie wedding vows have the line “in sickness and in health” on the one hand it’s nuts they openly admit that shit but also it’s good cause it means you can avoid them!

[quiet-admirer]

So sick of "it's okay to lose weight" feedist posts, there are so many other ways to say the message you're probably trying to get at than reinforcing medical fatphobia, disordered eating, weight cycling, and the diet industry, like, come on.

"You're still a gainer/feedee if you're not able to maintain your weight 100% of the time or keep up a constant growth for your entire life; that's an unrealistic expectation to put on yourself and others."

"Feeders and encouragers are not entitled to feedees' and gainers' bodies and don't get to make the rules for what they should be doing with their bodies."

"Sometimes we don't have control over what our bodies do when it comes to weight, such as with medical conditions or medications, and that has no bearing on how welcome someone is in this community or whether they're 'allowed to' show, celebrate, or express their sexuality with their body."

"Both celebrating and being openly judgemental toward specific individuals about weight loss are not welcome in this community, as they shouldn't be anywhere else, too. Don't harass people for their decisions about their body or treat them like a sex object who has betrayed you, personally, if you don't like the decision they are making about their body. Fat people are forced to live in an extremely fatphobic environment with a lot of complex forces pressuring them to lose weight and are often put in coercive, impossible decisions by people who have power over them."

"There are choices, support, and resources out there (and within this community) if you feel like you have no choice but to go along with the pressures of your fatphobic environment - and even if you really have no choice than to capitulate to oppression for your safety, we're still here for you."

"Let's help educate our community about medical and other forms of antifatness, and support and connect with each other to help break from shame cycles so that we are all less vulnerable to these pressures."

[funnier-as-a-feedist]

Feedism is fat liberation. You don't personally have to be into feedism but you do have to support it. There can't be fat liberation without allowing for people who choose to be fat, who choose to be turned on by their fatness.

[fatliberation]

I just wanna take certain fat liberationists and grab them by the shoulders and say, PEOPLE WHO LOVE YOUR BODY ARE NOT EVIL BECAUSE YOUR BODY IS NOT WRONGGGGGG

[hecatelund]

As someone who REALLY likes horror related wg, bad end wg, curses and magic and ghosts that make you fat, I’m gonna need one of my lovely pervs or some mysterious benefactor to book me a stay in a haunted mansion for tomorrow (Halloween) night. I’m like one of those ufo chasers who screams “take me” At the night sky, but for spooky weight gain.

If there’s a weird mirror, I’ll peer right in that fucker. Cookbook bound in human flesh? I’ll read it aloud cover to cover. A pristine cake in a lavish dining room in an otherwise run ramshackle mansion? I’m eating it with both hands. Take me, cliche weight gain horror scenario, I’m ready!!!

[dorianbleu]

I've never seen my kinks summed up so well. I would walk right in to a gingerbread house & sit down at the table with a napkin tucked in my shirt