seeräuber

| if I could, I'd be sleeping | PRT | 32 yo |

[bylercertainty]

it makes me laugh because the general audience used to ridicule and shame will for being weak, feminine, and queer

but now they praise and applaud his performance of masculinity and attractiveness

as if last month they weren’t mimicking the words of vecna to will

[dufrau]

thinking about shauna listening to jackie talk about jeff like he never even mattered when shauna is pregnant with his baby because she just wanted something jackie had and wanted to be wanted by someone who wanted jackie and now jackie doesnt even care anymore and shauna is stuck with this forever. and then jackie dies and then the baby dies but not before shauna has to give birth to him in the wilderness in winter surrounded by people who eat the dead and now fucking jeff sadecki is the last thing she has of either of them and what the hell is she supposed to do with that? she's stuck with him forever.

thinking about shauna beating lottie almost all the way to death to get all of that rage out of her and then when that rage is out of her they give her a knife and tell her to slit natalie's throat, and then when natalie runs and shauna is let off the hook for one thing for once they give her the knife again and tell her to cut up javi, the closest thing to a baby, so they can eat him, and now she's stuck with this, too. and all that rage she burned off didn't go anywhere, really. it's still right there.

and then im thinking about shauna watching lottie and everybody else crown natalie the queen for virtue of not dying, which is the same thing everybody has been doing, except for jackie and the baby and javi who all took chunks of shauna with them and left her with nothing but a knife.

im thinking about shauna who watches everybody gossip and laugh through the springtime knowing that when winter comes she will be the person who will have to cut them all up one by one so the rest of them can live and its very easy to see why she isnt friends with any of them anymore by then. she looks at them and she sees cuts of meat and how is she supposed to look at anybody normally ever again after that?

and its cruel, of course it is, everything she does to coach ben. it's not his fault, it's not about him at all, really, except that he is exactly the problem. he's innocent. he judges them. he sees what they have had to do to survive and pretends he never profited from any of it. pretends to be above it, uninvolved. he judges them. he judges her.

and shauna needs complicity from these people. she needs somebody else to know what it feels like to hold the knife. she needs people to be stuck with those guilty votes forever. tai with the gun and melissa with the knife and natalie at the butcher's table so that she's not the only one. and so ben is the sacrifice.

i saw somebody say that shauna doesnt want natalie to have to feel the pain of butchering a person, thats why she puts the cloth over his face. but that's not true. she *needs* natalie to know the pain of it, the guilt of it, the weight. The cloth is a lie she told herself would make it easier but she knows that Natalie is about to know what the inside of this man's joints look like either way and that she's going to be stuck knowing that forever.

they are going to be rescued someday and everybody will say "we did what we had to do to survive" and shauna needs to not be the only one who really has to mean that when she says it. and i guess she has that now. or she's about to.

[pressuredrightnow]

new wicked meme format dropped

[halcyon-hyacinth]

and it gets me every damn time

[lushed]

when hayley williams said "i wasted all my teenage years being a misery factory" and marina said "wish i'd been a prom queen fighting for the title, instead of being sixteen and burning up a bible" and mitski said "instead of pursuing something or going out and learning about or changing the world, i directed all that fire inward, and burnt myself up"

[elirluna]

[rogers-carter]

#the lesbian gaze

AGATHA ALL ALONG 1.05 - Darkest Hour Wake Thy Power

[thezenanna]

Love is a murder.

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[lifeafterpsychiatry]

Yes. Have YOU considered that sometimes working on hard things is both necessary and worthwhile?

[bemusedlybespectacled]

[grimrevolution]

x

[queer-boo-radley]

[dreamsofathena]

yes, due to unpopular demand, I'm back

[evviejo]

one last trip

[fatalcn]

They’re breaking up.

[autistictortoise]

In my opinion, the explosion does not happen, because Lawrence is proud, or ambitious, or too sinful. It's because he breaks the eighth commandment, "Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbour", aka you mustn't lie. Because he says before casting the vote (at least in the book, not sure of the exact wording in the movie) - I call as my witness Christ the Lord, who will be my judge, that my vote is given to the one who before God I think should be elected. And well, he lies. He does not think he should be elected. So Christ is his judge.

[bloodydifficult]

I waited. Finding you was a lost cause, but I'd catch myself waiting. And you came back, so look what I know.

[mimimar]

(open pages for better image quality)

the moment I heard elphaba's delivery of "there's a girl i know..." in i'm not that girl i knew i had to draw this comic, i strongly recommend listening to it while you read for the full experience!

this comic is a companion to this piece (which was inspired by glinda's delivery of the same line in the i'm not that girl reprise).

pages 1-4 are from elphie's pov, pages 5-8 are from glinda's.

prints of individual pages: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8

flower meanings in order of appearance:

[local-gun-witch]