UNITED STATES OF SMASH

David, 28. INTJ. Father, nerd, thespian, politico. Only occasionally active here.

[animentality]

[embroideredcupcake]

Damn straight there’s a Bisexual Agenda.

It’s to replace all cars with trained pterodactyls by 2025.

[iridescentoracle]

#then I for one welcome our new bisexual overlords

[assiraphales]

babe. I know we’re all going thru a lot rn but I just wanna give u the heads up that sesame streets future is in jeopardy. hbo has chosen not to renew it for new episodes (a series that has been going since 1969) and the residents of 123 Sesame Street no longer have a home :(

[assiraphales]

n all seriousness sesame street is such an important piece of living media. it has been around for DECADES and from day 1 highlighted the importance of diversity empathy and education for children in a fun way. their mission statement is “Helping Kids Everywhere Grow Smarter, Stronger, and Kinder”. it’s been such an influence for so many people at a formative age. it’s creators made it w the intention that it could be a resource for underprivileged kids and help them prepare for kindergarten. thousands of people have learned english from our friends on sesame. pls (at media corporations) don’t let a beloved cultural phenomenon die

[kinggizzard]

im quitting tumblr

[wwubwubwubwuubwub-deactivated20]

ok see u tomorrow

[kinggizzard]

this post is now 10 fucking years old

[xenasaur]

and ur ass is still here

[cyarskj1899]

[fairycosmos]

the same 4 meals in rotation i love you. i love you the same 4 meals in rotation

[doctorfreak]

this is absolutely sending me

[peerieweirdo]

What a way to find out that you’re a vampire

[greenmossloveisreal1998iloveyou]

Have fun in the war dumbass I’ll be at home fucking military wives

[unbossed-deactivated20251218]

[eastbayfatman]

Damn. Good way to get your fucking windows kicked in

[greenmossloveisreal1998iloveyou]

shut the fuck up and raise my son bootlicker

[lowtiermemer]

All fun and games until someone with 3 confirmed kills shows up at your doorstep with a baseball bat

[greenmossloveisreal1998iloveyou]

im not at my house tho, im at yours with your wife

[penguitron-deactivated20211130]

But he’s got shooters all over the world 🌎 even when he’s away

[greenmossloveisreal1998iloveyou]

just shot a load in his wife

[hitting-on-cullen-deactivated20]

You ungrateful asshole. My bf might be fighting for your freedom and you’re here mocking him for keeping your pathetic ass safe from the threats of the world. If a war comes to our country, we’re not saving you, you dumbass ungrateful fuck up of a human being.

[greenmossloveisreal1998iloveyou]

Your bf is fighting for oil and killing civilians and probably cheating on you he’s a scumbag, which is why I just fucked his mom to make a better son

[thetyrannosaur]

[heardbook]

The fool taunts the hungry dogs but the dogs have their day and the fool becomes a feast

[greenmossloveisreal1998iloveyou]

your girl boutta be the feast soon as you get deployed boot boy

[berylb33]

World Heritage Post

[cpineau1973]

Who ever was the first person to post this is the biggest piece of shit in the world. You’re an amoral ASSHOLE!!!!!

[cpineau1973]

Hotmeat89 you are a disgrace you don’t deserve to be called an American! You don’t even have the right to call yourself a MAN!

[greenmossloveisreal1998iloveyou]

I don’t call myself a man but your wife still calls me to fuck

[testosteronetwink]

happy veterans day

[mslippy]

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

#is that robert reich father of sam reich game changer man

He's also the former US Secretary of Labor and served in the administrations of multiple US presidents but yes, he is the father of sam reich game changer man

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

#im sorry was no one gonna tell me Sam Reich Game Changer is the son of the former US Secretary of Labor#not to take away from the initial message (even though like yeah we been known)#but like that feels like information tumblr would be more forthcoming with in their praise of that show

Why do you think the dropout cast all joke about him being a nepo baby?

The reason he's the CEO of dropout is because when collegehumor was dying and the cast all wanted to keep working together and having fucking jobs, he was the only one in a mass of starving artists who could afford to buy and try to resuscitate it. That was a massive financial risk and the fact that it seems to be working is nothing short of a miracle. Everyone thank former US Secretary of Labor and general champion of worker's rights Robert Reich for raising a son with financial security.

[shigraki]

*walks into american followers bedrooms* *in gentle voice* hows it going champ

[dicksnot-deactivated20210512]

[demimonde-semigoddess]

[mapsontheweb]

The Great Lakes and Saint Lawrence River superimposed on a map of Europe

[tinsnip]

…OH.

[mazarinedrake]

I googled it once and the only reason why the Great Lakes aren’t called inland seas is because they are entirely freshwater, not salt.

By any other metric they’d be seas. Superior especially (the big one in the upper left) behaves like a small ocean, and has claimed at least 250 ships and over 1000 people. Gordon Lightfoot wrote a frankly chilling song about her that I’ll include here:

[salamencerobot]

Lake Michigan has never fully frozen. Leading to some absolutely terrifying images

Layers of ice created, shattered, and built up like this.

[tigirl-and-co]

Hey, here’s a picture of that lighthouse in 2015, when we had a polar vortex

[dappercyborg]

I love the Great Lakes, you know how all boats look like shit, like just rusty hulks, you don’t get that on the Great Lakes because it’s fresh water, like the shipwrecks are incredibly well preserved

[chaeronaea]

[houshou]

why do things aimed at “gamers” look like that

[french-boat-deactivated20181217]

look like what?

[houshou]

[suppyguppy]

[captainthundernuts]

you fucking leave reaper out of this

[suppyguppy]

[casualgabrielreyes]

[garlicguzzler]

15-20 years from now, everyone will be calling this “aesthetic” and “gamer-core” or something of that note. The exact same treatment that old windows computers and fruitigo aero are getting today. You’ll find blogs online dedicated to this, stimboards and all. Young people will be saying “take me back to when technology was actually good”. There will be hundreds of playlists with things you never even considered to be related to this. Mark my words.

[susiephone]

"this world is functionally a dystopia but this story is also a comedy" is a god tier setting.

[susiephone]

[srldesigns6277]

If by some miracle sweet potato Hitler doesn't win come the end of the week, this won't be necessary, but should he win here are some of the first things to be aware of or do.

If you know a trans person, no you don't. Respect them as best you can in private but you know nothing in public.

Be aware that TikTok will likely be banned, find new platforms to spread information. Fuck Twitter and what ever tiktok replacement he's working on.

Learn to Garden, even in winter so you can feed yourself should prices skyrocket

Get an air purifier. The Clean Air Act is likely to be stripped of its power with the EPA deregulated, air quality is going to suffer

Should you have kids, try to supplement history/social studies education. That's the first place they will attack, if you need help ask, history teacher will help

Try and do what you can to be aware of your health before January.

Help one another. That's the best way we can move forward and make change in the future.

[useless-englandfacts]

oh someone at the guardian has lost the will to live

[useless-englandfacts]

christ (source)

[unorcadox]

[williswareinc-deactivated202408]

gotta catch 'em all, dude