Recreation of a true to life conversation between roommates.

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@dysfunctionalroommates
Recreation of a true to life conversation between roommates.
Colours
Scene - Roommate is playing Stardew Valley. Topic of conversation is Sebastian, one of the characters in the game.
___________________________________________________________
Me: He looks like you! Purple hair that's more on one side.
Roommate: No he doesn't - he has black hair!
Me: Your computer is black, compare that against his hair - his is purple!!
Roommate: Noooo, anyway my hair is blue! *holds up a lock of her hair*
...
*looks at it*
.... okay so this bit is purple but at the top I'm blue!!!
Me: *mumbles* All the hair in this conversation is purple.
Roommate Problems #4
When you plan to go out to be social and end out acting like an old couple
Roommate: Are we going out for a meal or drinks
Me: Meal!
Roommate: Is it just going to be us or are we going to invite people?
Me:... *pisses self laughing, and we share a look acknowledging the couple-ness of that sentence*
Me: ... Do you want to go to Yo Sushi?
Roommate: I was just about to fucking say that! ... Or we could be more interesting.
Me: What about Wagamama?
Roommate: *didn't hear properly* Wagawowo?
Me: xD!!!!!
Roommate: Wagamomo?
Me:.... *typing this down*
Roommate: Waga mo jo?
A conversation I had with R, I still stand by the ideaā¦
^ Another Roommate Blog. Itās great to hear that crazy roommates exist elsewhere in the world. xD
Another gem from my roommate and Iās fb messages.... as you can see that was the end of that convo until a month later. xD
nuff said.
Roommate Problems #3
When you still get surprised about how much you actually know about each other.
Scene: On another group chat a friend broke her toe and I (text on right) said how AD had also broken her toes before... then this msg came through:
HAHAHAHAHA Reblog and Send to Your roommate šš
Amused Duer and I played Mad Libs⦠weāve never cried so much.
the signs as college roommates
aries: jumps into bed and hurts a part of their body, promptly asks "did you see that?"
taurus: labels everything in the shared fridge as "mine," shares it anyway
gemini: accidentally slams door at 3 in the morning, apologizes loudly
cancer: is never home due to how many things they are involved in, is only home to eat ramen and binge watch netflix
leo: rearranges everything in the shower according to how much soap is left in the bottle
virgo: does homework due in a month, questions your work ethic
libra: orders a pizza with everything on it to make sure they didn't miss your favorite topping
scorpio: falls out of bed in hysterics and complains about all the cute people on campus
sagittarius: spends the time they should be studying watching old youtube memes
capricorn: is silent for hours, and suddenly screams "FUCK" about forgetting something that they were supposed to do two hours ago
aquarius: looks up from laptop on a sunday night and shakes their head silently before getting back to whatever it was they were doing
pisces: mutters under their breath while cleaning, the muttering is actually old taylor swift songs
Geographically Impaired Roommate
Today in one of our lovely conversations, my roommate asked me where Birmingham is, as sheās ānever beenā -
Me: ... Youāve been to Birmingham - we went 2 years ago to that photography convention.
Roommate: did we?!
Me:.... did you just get onto a train with me, without actually knowing where we were going?!
Roommate: You seemed to know what you were doing so I just kind of followed you!
Anyone else have a friend like this?
Me after sharing an old and overused joke between me and my roommate: You know, I will miss the old jokes we have when we move out and the new ones that won't be made.
Roommate: Yeah... or we can just go to the same care home.
Me: God no.
Roommate: I will put that in my will.
(Moment of silence)
Roommate: Wait I will be dead!
Roommate Problems #2: Mishearing each other
Roommate: *makes happy noise*
Me: What?
Roommate: I thought I ate all the porn but I've just found another one!!
Me: EXCUSE ME?!
Roommate: I've just found another prawn! *eating curry*
When discussing how only imbeciles break their little toes to a friend who had done just that my roommate cuts in saying that it is fine, AmusedDuer has also broken her toes.
I donāt remember ever saying that I had broken my toes to @eager-teigr so I proceeded to stare at my toes to see if they looked weird, later realising I donāt look at other peopleās feet enough to know what looks weird and what doesnāt.
I texted the roomie to ask how she knew and her only response was:
āWe have lived together for two years.ā
Thatās a fair point I suppose.
Roommate Problems #1
You at some point stop finding things to talk about.
Me: So have I told you about the time I broke my broth-
Roommate: Yes
Me: Or when I got stuc-
Roommate: Yes
Me: O-
Roommate: Yes.
That awkward moment when you thrust your boobs towards your roommates face whilst demonstrating how you opened the bathroom door.
(For context I am on crutches)