내 발을 먹어 @e-dater - Tumblr Blog

thoughtsof-r

stunningpicture

I noticed some writing on my godfather’s shirt. I asked him to please hold still so I could read it. Well, then.

persephonesecretlair

I need this shirt.

qualitees

I found it online here!

aristocratic-bohemian

I want this shirt lol

prettyboyhaikyu

I love this shirt

buttermilkbaddie-deactivated202

Everytime I saw this and thought it said “grandfather” and I was like why is no one talking about the grandfather is fit af but…nvm lol

foggysandwichcollector-blog

Omg I did too

gymnrat6969

Hey, grandpa’s can be just as fit and horny as you young guys. And we know all the moves too!!!

itsagifnotagif

Wtf

officialjiggly

Look at link. He looks so happy. This is the happiest he has ever been. He deserves this.

jessieteamrocket

not for long

lady--katie

fierzz

you know he’s dead

blacktouch007

ginascorpio88

sustainablefarming-deactivated2

Beyonce literally took in oxygen and exhaled carbon dioxide. She literally turned. A. Gas. Into. A. Different. Gas. I don’t think yall understand that Literally no one has ever done that before.

blackmodel

scientists everywhere are gagged

darklingreaper666-deactivated20

Are… are you joking? Please tell me she’s joking…

weaux-deactivated20170327

no???? this is all 100% fact

burntspoons

alliwannadoisbangscrew

me

ladygolem

hair: detachable

torso: crushed

dick: out

the lower half of my body is forcibly ejected from the hydraulic press at ninety miles an hour

self-healing

stop believing that you ran out of time to shape yourself into who you want to be! stop believing that its ruined! stop believing you don’t have potential! you are not a fixed being! you have endless opportunities to grow.

softblues-deactivated20141213

riceblush-deactivated20181229

Can we please stop acting like mixed people are watered down versions of their ethncities

rayvone-deactivated20200430

H&M unisex collection

I love this so much

azriona

I want to watch this for the next century.

memewhore

professorspork

#this single photo here validates the existence of the selfie stick I SWEAR TO GOD

elfybean

hekacute-deactivated20141230

I went to high school with a kid who would only drink out of a baby bottle. He brought a large baby bottle to school every day. At first, we thought that he was using it to sneak alcohol or something, but he wasn’t. He would bring it filled with chocolate milk and then fill it up with Coca-Cola and Sprite during lunch. He’d buy a can of each and mix them together. Like I said, it was a large bottle.

I didn’t know the kid that well and I didn’t have any classes with him so I never really talked to him that much. I knew his name. His name was Kevin. Sometimes I’d see him at parties on the weekends. He still had his baby bottle. He would fill it with beer and rum.

He dated my sister’s friend, Emily, for a little while. I had known Emily for a long time. She had been a friend of my sister’s since they were five or six. They were really good friends. She spent a lot of time at our house for sleepovers and stuff. Sometimes she would pee the bed, but I never made fun of her for it. I think most older brothers would have loved the opportunity to make fun of their sister’s friend for peeing the bed and I think she really appreciated that I never mentioned it even though I definitely knew about it because after the sixth or seventh time, my parents started paying me to clean everything up instead of having to do it themselves.

I asked Emily why Kevin only ever drank out of a baby bottle and she said that she didn’t know. They had only been dating for a very short time at that point and she didn’t want to bring it up and offend him or anything. I asked her to tell me if she ever found out. They broke up right after that and I kind of forgot about it because Kevin stopped going to school. I don’t know if he transferred or dropped out, but I never saw him at lunch or any parties after that.

I hadn’t thought about him in a long time, but Emily happened to mention him while she was over at our house recently and I immediately remembered the baby bottle thing.

“Did you ever find out why he drank out of that bottle?” I asked.

“Oh yeah, he told me why,” Emily said. “He used it because he heard that babies that drink out of bottles for too long or drink sweet drinks out of them get really bad teeth problems. He wanted all of his teeth to go bad so that they would fall out and he would be able to fit a softball in his mouth. He said that he wanted to have the world record for being the first person to be able to put a whole softball in his mouth and he wouldn’t be able to do that with all of those teeth in the way.”