Eating Like a 5 Year Old

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[eatinglikea5yearold]

IG #1... what Do u think this is? #question about how to use this damn thing. (at home - jersey city heights)

[eatinglikea5yearold]

Summer drinks ala 2012 and a shot of a robot Paula Deen.

[eatinglikea5yearold]

here's a post dedicated to my [somewhat] awesome girlfriend, liz.  cause I think she may be mad that I had 3 fantasy football drafts this week and I basically ignored her yesterday because it was my most intense draft (ever. 14 teams, 17 rounds). also, she made guacamole and didn't offer me any, which was kind of rude.

for some context, this is from a lovely dinner back in May, but has been replicated many times since.  also, she doesn't have a working microwave.  she's definitely gonna be mad I just put her on blast.  also... kitty!

so... how bout we make dinner tonight, e?

[eatinglikea5yearold]

Good Morning, Pork Bun [is the name of a Chinese morning talk show]

Fay Da Bakery

[eatinglikea5yearold]

You know what happens when you have 5 things in your fridge and 2 of them have already gone bad?  Frozen Mexican Rice with Pepperoni and Shredded Cheddar Cheese... aka... Hood Jumbalaya.

[eatinglikea5yearold]

Chinese food is comforting.  King Wok knows how to serve up your typical Boneless BBQ Spare Ribs in the right way... with a mound of meat and a healthy serving of fried rice.  and really... exactly what kind of meat is "spare rib?"  

Who cares? 

That "bbq" sauce is banging. 

[eatinglikea5yearold]

Oh, Zafra.  How modest you are... Your chef (Maricel Presilla) finally won a James Beard award, yet there's hardly anything pretentious about your small, yet totally awesome establishment.  Your Ropa Vieja is to die [die,die,dieeee] for, while your Llapingachos con Salsa de Maní y Ají (potato & cheese patty w/ peanut sauce and spicy aji relish) was passable.   

Oh, and your BYOB?  

Oh yeaaa

[eatinglikea5yearold]

mmm.. cheesy fries-that-look-like-chips. 

courtesy of the Kapeteria.  

[eatinglikea5yearold]

Thunder Jackson's. West Village, NYC.  Passing by at night, this place looks like your average frat-lovin, cleavage-poppin, sloppy drunk dive bar.  I don't really care about any of that since I stopped by during lunch-time... and it really doesn't matter since this meal actually blew me away.

Cheeseburger melt with filthy fries is what's pictured above.  Everything was surprisingly awesome.  Way more awesome than I expected.  Butterly browned bread, juicy burger and melty, droolingly melty cheese.  More impressive was how the burger sandwich kept its composure while stuffing it down my throat.  Those fries are like crack, too.  Crispy with a helping of old bay seasoning, and maybe a little cinnamon.  Also came with homemade ketchup (couldn't tell you bout it) and truffle mayo (+).  

Yea... I love surprises like this.

[eatinglikea5yearold]

Corned beef hash is one of those foods that sounds like you know what's in it, but really you have no freaking clue...

all I know is that it goes perfectly with home fries, hash browns and bacon.

[eatinglikea5yearold]

Here's a bunch of stuff I ate on April 15th... 

1/4 of a knish from The Knishery.

1 piece of raspberry rugelach from Russ and Daughters

What the hell is this small sliver of pastrami from Katz's Deli

The three reasons above are why you don't go on nyc food tours (and that was with some groupon-esq deal).  Who's supposed to get full off these portions?  I'm not a goddamn elf.  

Also featured: legit-lemon chicken cooked in carrots and potatoes (there may have been parsnips in there, too).  Homecooked by me and E.  

[eatinglikea5yearold]

Molly's Cupcakes. For Breakfast. Around 3 or 4 months ago.. 

[eatinglikea5yearold]

It's been a while but I'm back to eating like a 5 year old

[eatinglikea5yearold]

That sounds fair enough. My problem is.. I want to run in the morning, but I am so not a morning person. So the only time I've ever tried to run was at night & that didn't go so well because I'm a chicken shit.

what im about to say is not a joke... 

go to sleep in your running clothes.  wake up.  run.

running in the morning is the bestt

[eatinglikea5yearold]

Philadelphia in 7 frames...

[eatinglikea5yearold]

PB & hash brown / PB & bacon.... mmmmm

[eatinglikea5yearold]

[Philly] Cheesesteak with Peppers and Whiz

@ Jim's Steaks - South Street - Philadelphia, PA

Thoughts: If this isn't classy... I don't know what is.  Jim's lived up to whatever expectations I might have had for it, but come on... a little more whiz never hurt anyone.