What

Please enjoy this compilation of things I may find interesting, funny, or otherwise pretty rad

[fidelcostco]

can't believe the only options are 30 minutes early or 10 minutes late. if only there were some other way. but what can you do

[coffeeeandbaileys]

[mammalianmammals]

Red Slender Loris (Loris tardigradus), family Lorisidae, endemic to Sri Lanka

ENDANGERED.

photograph by Ganganath & Dianie

[despazito]

[sluttynurse]

i am so undertattooed

[dogpuppy]

[tragicburnout]

[dragonroyaly]

[flowerytale]

[wildspringday]

[monster2001]

Sleep schedule gap relationship

[toskarin]

the woman in the river shows me an axe of silver and asks if it is the one I lost. I respond that it is. she produces an axe of gold and asks the same question again. I shamefully look away, not sure whether I'm comfortable admitting that I was dual wielding

[toskarin]

she stares at me in abject confusion as I take stock of my tools. a look of dissatisfaction brews on her face. "but why is one golden?" the woman asks.

I tug nervously at my coat, feeling the slightest bit insulted. "well, it's not cheap to have a matching pair," I tell her. "not everyone can afford two golden axes."

"why not two silver axes?"

"I had the money for one golden axe."

the woman crosses her arms. "but the gold is worse for everything you'd want an axe to do."

"it's not. it was more expensive and also really hard to find."

"gold" she says, "is softer than silver."

"it's literally not, though," I say. "that's a really common misconception, but pure silver is softer than gold."

"most metal sold as silver is actually an alloy. that axe is probably sterling silver. I don't believe for a second someone made you a pure silver axe."

I look at my axe, then back to the woman, then back to my axe.

"it was pure silver when it went into the river."

an unreadable expression. with a great splash, the woman disappears into the current.

[encryptidarchivist]

count dracula? uhhh ok. one

[zamczysko]

WRONG! searching "dracula" on letterboxd alone gives almost 600 results! and that's just movies! thousands of draculas are upon us

[kozlarz]

cmon they just started… give it some time

[encryptidarchivist]

thank you.

two

[seashellronan]

guys i’m so sorry to say this but exercising and indulging in hobbies rather than scrolling on your phone for 200 hours actually does improve your mood and overall mental health, this has deeply upset me more than anyone

[dark-magician-girl-meets-world]

I tried distracting a vampire by throwing rice at him, but I only had two grains with me so it didn't work. He counted them instantly. Then he asked me what I was even doing with exactly two grains of rice, and I explained how a bowl of rice tastes better if you spread it out over an entire day. I asked him if he was gonna suck my blood but he said no, he just had a lot more questions about the rice thing.

[mortimermcmirestinks]

get him to count the questions he has about the rice thing and run while he's distracted

[ewaneneollav]

*sits up in bed, stretches, yawns* it’s another beautiful, glorious day full of opportunity a- *ominous bell toll and i am instantly replaced with a 10,000-year-old mummy sitting in the exact same pose*

[jethroq]

[wizard-council-bureaucrat]

🌀Your house would look better with a big oil painting of the Wizard🌀

🌀Your house would look better with a big oil painting of the Wizard🌀

🌀Your house would look better with a big oil painting of the Wizard🌀

🌀Your house would look better with a big oil painting of the Wizard🌀

🌀Your house would look better with a big oil painting of the Wizard🌀