The Den of Misfortune

Age: 21 | Current Obsession: IDK Whatever ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[wolfae34]

Jason: “They’re children, Bruce! They shouldn’t be soldiers in your crusade!”

Bruce: “The children, Jason. They yearn for the capes.”

[everwalldigan-deactivated202602]

EXACTLY this is what always pisses me off when I see people say things like “Batman goes shopping for orphans to put in suits and send them to die!!” (Exaggerated) when Bruce is on his knees BEGGING his children to not be vigilantes

Bruce: chum PLEASE let me give you a normal childhood I’ll literally give you anything you want just don’t wear a traffic light and go fight crime

Literally any of his kids: you DENY miette this wish? You FORBID miette from beating up criminals? Oh! Oh! So much cruelty! You hate miette! Cruel bat furry! Jail for you!

[trekkele]

#also Jason hypocrite supreme Todd #Jason literally packed his rucksack and ran away when Bruce refused to make him Robin #Tim literally has to drag Bruce crying and screaming to make him Robin #dick would have gone out in his homemade costume with the protection of paper mache regardless of anything Bruce would have said #Damian is self explanatory #Stephs tenure as Robin speaks for itself #the point is you get what I mean #Bruce is literally terrorised by these kids daily his gray hairs are so strong he has to dye his hair every day (tags from @everwalldigan)

[thegothicchangelingthesequel]

If Jason Todd had a child he would make a big thing out of being the best parent ever, specifically pointing out to Bruce how he's doing better than he did with him. He'd be all "look at how my kid is being supervised, Bruce. We wouldn't want them running away to Ethiopia," but it would backfire and Bruce would just be proud of what a good parent Jason is.

[incorrectbatfam]

Everyone's afraid of Bruce of Alfred catching them doing something they're not supposed to when the person they should be afraid of is Duke. Not only can he see the light traces of what they've done, but he can also hold it over them in new and exciting ways, like threatening to tell Wonder Woman that Jason rehearses asking her to adopt him

[tieflingkisser]

[pardalote]

Mine was buried even deeper, under Devices -> Typing -> How AI has helped you.

(Spoiler: it hadn't helped me. But it was on by default.)

[arlo-mike]

claim your badge here

[bearcosmic]

Tim and Jason sitting in the manor with Damian, helping him out with his college application

Tim: D why does your resume say that you actively volunteer at an orphanage? The hours you put on here say you work there more than full time.

Jason: I am totally for lying on your resume, but you have to at least make it believable brat. If you’re gonna commit a crime at least do it well.

Damian: Those hours are accurate, they may even be a little on the lower end.

Tim: Dami wouldn’t we notice you leaving every single day to go volunteer for 10 hours a day? We would never see you.

Damian: Why would I need to leave the manor to volunteer at an orphanage?

Jason: . .

Tim: . .

Jason: You listed Alfred as your supervisor?

Tim: WE ARE THE ORPHANS?!?

[waterfire1848]

[ After the Batkids destroyed the manor. ]

Jason: Anyone else have the weird urge to lecture themselves?

Jason, as Bruce: Jason, what are you doing?

Bruce, appearing from behind Jason: Jason, what are you doing?

Jason: I conjured him.

[crimsun]

If you can correctly pronounce every word in this poem, you will be speaking English better than 90% of the native English speakers in the world. After trying the verses, a Frenchman said he'd prefer six months of hard labour to reading six lines aloud. Try them yourself.

Dearest creature in creation, Study English pronunciation. I will teach you in my verse Sounds like corpse, corps, horse, and worse. I will keep you, Suzy, busy, Make your head with heat grow dizzy. Tear in eye, your dress will tear. So shall I! Oh hear my prayer. Just compare heart, beard, and heard, Dies and diet, lord and word, Sword and sward, retain and Britain. (Mind the latter, how it’s written.) Now I surely will not plague you With such words as plaque and ague. But be careful how you speak: Say break and steak, but bleak and streak; Cloven, oven, how and low, Script, receipt, show, poem, and toe. Hear me say, devoid of trickery, Daughter, laughter, and Terpsichore, Typhoid, measles, topsails, aisles, Exiles, similes, and reviles; Scholar, vicar, and cigar, Solar, mica, war and far; One, anemone, Balmoral, Kitchen, lichen, laundry, laurel; Gertrude, German, wind and mind, Scene, Melpomene, mankind. Billet does not rhyme with ballet, Bouquet, wallet, mallet, chalet. Blood and flood are not like food, Nor is mould like should and would. Viscous, viscount, load and broad, Toward, to forward, to reward. And your pronunciation’s OK When you correctly say croquet, Rounded, wounded, grieve and sieve, Friend and fiend, alive and live. Ivy, privy, famous; clamour And enamour rhyme with hammer. River, rival, tomb, bomb, comb, Doll and roll and some and home. Stranger does not rhyme with anger, Neither does devour with clangour. Souls but foul, haunt but aunt, Font, front, wont, want, grand, and grant, Shoes, goes, does. Now first say finger, And then singer, ginger, linger, Real, zeal, mauve, gauze, gouge and gauge, Marriage, foliage, mirage, and age. Query does not rhyme with very, Nor does fury sound like bury. Dost, lost, post and doth, cloth, loth. Job, nob, bosom, transom, oath. Though the differences seem little, We say actual but victual. Refer does not rhyme with deafer. Foeffer does, and zephyr, heifer. Mint, pint, senate and sedate; Dull, bull, and George ate late. Scenic, Arabic, Pacific, Science, conscience, scientific. Liberty, library, heave and heaven, Rachel, ache, moustache, eleven. We say hallowed, but allowed, People, leopard, towed, but vowed. Mark the differences, moreover, Between mover, cover, clover; Leeches, breeches, wise, precise, Chalice, but police and lice; Camel, constable, unstable, Principle, disciple, label. Petal, panel, and canal, Wait, surprise, plait, promise, pal. Worm and storm, chaise, chaos, chair, Senator, spectator, mayor. Tour, but our and succour, four. Gas, alas, and Arkansas. Sea, idea, Korea, area, Psalm, Maria, but malaria. Youth, south, southern, cleanse and clean. Doctrine, turpentine, marine. Compare alien with Italian, Dandelion and battalion. Sally with ally, yea, ye, Eye, I, ay, aye, whey, and key. Say aver, but ever, fever, Neither, leisure, skein, deceiver. Heron, granary, canary. Crevice and device and aerie. Face, but preface, not efface. Phlegm, phlegmatic, ass, glass, bass. Large, but target, gin, give, verging, Ought, out, joust and scour, scourging. Ear, but earn and wear and tear Do not rhyme with here but ere. Seven is right, but so is even, Hyphen, roughen, nephew Stephen, Monkey, donkey, Turk and jerk, Ask, grasp, wasp, and cork and work. Pronunciation (think of Psyche!) Is a paling stout and spikey? Won’t it make you lose your wits, Writing groats and saying grits? It’s a dark abyss or tunnel: Strewn with stones, stowed, solace, gunwale, Islington and Isle of Wight, Housewife, verdict and indict. Finally, which rhymes with enough, Though, through, plough, or dough, or cough? Hiccough has the sound of cup. My advice is to give up!!!

– The Chaos by Gerard Nolst Trenité

[frostbittenbucky]

Bruce: “while I’m gone Jason’s Batman”

Dick: “are you crazy?”

Bruce: “Dick when you cover for me everyone knows it’s not the real batman, you’re too nice. When Jason fills in they just think Batman’s having a really bad week”

Jason: “I’m going to fuck so many people up”

[teaboot]

Wait what's a buildings fire evacuation plan if you aren't supposed to use the elevator to get down

[lazodiac]

You go down the stairwell/fire escape. Is that weird?

[teaboot]

But what if you have a walker or a wheelchair??

[durpacerangerrogjro]

in america at least, in this situation, there isnt one. either your loved ones or the firemen can get you out using the emergency fire escapes or stairs, or you die 

[teaboot]

That's fucking horrific, thank you

[official-lucifers-child]

“fun” little story:

last summer my friend who is an amazingly talented artist and i were in this super tall building, and she’s in a wheelchair and i’m pushing her around the room. it’s an art exhibit and some of her art was chosen to be showcased there and so it’s all fine and dandy until suddenly an alarm starts going off

a FIRE ALARM

everyone starts running for the stairs and my friend just looks at me with this forlorn look on her face

“i can’t go down the stairs”

but i’m a stubborn bitch “i’ll carry you”

“what about my chair? it’s too expensive for me to be able to get another one if i can’t get this one back”

“i’ll carry that too”

and i did. we went to the stairs (by then most people from our floor were gone) and i lifted her up in a fireman’s carry over my shoulder and then lifted her chair up and used the ridiculous amount of adrenaline that was coursing through my veins to make it down approximately 20 half-flights of stairs until we met some people exiting lower floors, one of which who kindly took the chair. I changed positions so i was holding my friend bridal-style which was, somehow, easier and the person who took her wheelchair (with her permission to handle it of course) accompanied me to the ground floor and then out the doors

basically there is no real protocol for people who can’t use the stairs in an emergency. it’s up to the people with them, if anyone, to help them or the person to somehow make it down the stairs alone, unassisted

thank fuck that it was just a faulty alarm system, because if i was unable to carry her down those stairs and the building was on fucking fire???? then i don’t know what would have happened to her, but i don’t think it would have been very good.

it’s fucking ridiculous and ableist to the absolute max.

[girlfriendsofthegalaxy]

I use a cane. When I did a day-long fire safety training at my northeast American university (UMass Amherst), I asked that exact same question: “what am I supposed to do if the fire alarm goes off and I’m in my lab on the twelfth floor?” 

the fire marshal hemmed and hawed for a while and then said to take the elevator- you’re supposed to leave it free for the fire department to use and they want able-bodied people out fast not waiting for elevators. if the fire alarm has just gone off the building probably hasn’t suffered enough structural damage to make using the elevator dangerous, and modern elevator wells are heavily reinforced. many large and high-trafficked buildings on my campus have fire rated elevators that link in with the fire alarm system so they won’t let you off on a floor with a possible fire. 

if the elevator isn’t working, wait in the stairwell and call the fire department to let them know where you are. modern stairwells are also heavily reinforced- it might not be pleasant but modern building code usually requires fire-resistant stairwell doors in office and big residential buildings, also to help firefighters get in and out safely. older buildings’ stairwells may or may not be retrofitted with fire-resistant doors but a stairwell is generally the safest place to wait if you can’t get out. 

what happened to your friend was horrible, and i’m very glad you were there to help her out, but you can absolutely use the elevator to evacuate if it’s not shut down. those don’t-use-the-elevator rules are for abled people.  

[tisfan]

This is GOOD TO KNOW. why do they not tell people this??

[ravynfyre]

Okay, firefighter here. If you are not physically able to use the stairs, and the elevator is NOT compromised, use the elevator. But you MUST be ABSOLUTELY CERTAIN that the elevator is NOT compromised before you get into it, because there is always the chance that once you get into it, you may not exit it. Power could go out. The elevator may actually BE compromised and you just couldn’t tell from where you were until you were in there, and it suddenly shuts down on you. Something else could happen. 

Understand that once you enter the elevator, you could POTENTIALLY be taking your life into your hands there.

It is NOT LIKELY, to be perfectly honest. It’s only in a pretty catastrophic scenario - think the Twin Towers, USA, on September 11th - that the elevators will be compromised and out of service. But there is a NOT ZERO PERCENT CHANCE and you need to understand that and accept it.

As for leaving the elevators free for the firefighters, okay, here’s the deal. Unless your nearest fire station is literally right next door? Your first on scene fire truck is NOT likely to be there on scene and needing that elevator before you get to the ground. It takes us TIME to find the address, gear up, and drive to the building. Then we need to hoof it into where the elevators even ARE, so YOU HAVE TIME to use the elevator to get down to the ground floor... BUT ONLY IF THERE’S NOT A RUSH ON THE ELEVATOR! And THAT is WHY we don’t tell people this shit. That’s WHY we tell people to NEVER USE THE ELEVATOR... because every self-entitled asshole will use it because they don’t feel like walking, and then put YOU in danger by delaying the elevator’s arrival to you.

IF, however, the elevator IS compromised, or you just can’t get it to come for you, or whatever, and you either don’t have anyone with you who has the adrenaline fueled BALLS to be able to toss you over their shoulder and hoof it down the stairs with you - because, let’s face it, that is RARE AS FUCK, then HERE IS WHAT YOU DO:

You call 911 and tell the call taker that you are in the building that has a fire alarm going off, and you are not able to evacuate because of a physical disability, and you tell them what floor you are on, and EXACTLY what stairwell you are waiting at. And the very FIRST thing that the firefighters are going to do once they arrive, if it is, indeed, a REAL emergency, and not a false alarm, is come get your ass and bring you down. Whether that means carrying you down the stairs, or whether that means locking out the elevators so that no one else can override them and coming to get you themselves, they WILL come get you FIRST THING if it is a real event. And if it is a false alarm? You will probably be the first person who is not involved with the building to know, because the call-taker is going to stay on the line with you until you are under someone’s care and out of danger, or until the scene has been sorted out as real or false, and you are out of danger that way.

These are pretty standard operations in the fire service throughout the United States. There may be some minor variations based on specific municipalities, but, for the most part, this is pretty typical: LIFE BEFORE PROPERTY. So, as long as SOMEONE knows where you are - hence why you call 911 - Firefighters will come get you. You are NOT alone, and you have NOT been abandoned. I PROMISE. It’s like, our whole reason for doing the shit we do: to save lives and to break shit. Sometimes, we get lucky enough to do both at the same time.

High rise fires suck ass, and I always hated them. But the very FIRST thing I asked anytime we got one was if we had “any entrapments” - which is what we call anyone who could not self-evacuate for ANY reason. We ain’t leaving you behind. And yes, your friend who doesn’t have the stamina to carry you down can stay with you, too. Because I would never ask that of someone, honestly. 

Also, just a little FYI... MOST fire alarms are false alarms. Not to make anyone complacent or anything, but, yeah. Most of them are either system malfunctions, someone accidentally hit a pull station, or someone burned popcorn in a break room. So don’t let a fire alarm freak you out until you need it to - by smelling or seeing smoke or flames. 

[gentle--riot]

i have had multiple nightmares about this very thing because NOBODY BOTHERS TO ACTUALLY TELL WHEELCHAIR USERS THIS STUFF

[downwiththebad]

I am loving these additions!

If you're disabled, this is worth the time and focusing energy to read through!!!

[kyraneko]

Short version:

If disabled and the fire alarm is just happened, you're allowed to take the elevators down but there's a small possibility you could get stuck if the elevators are compromised.

If you can't use the elevators or don't want that risk, go to the stairwell which is reinforced against fire, close the doors, and call 911 to let them know you are in that particular stairwell and can't get down.

Fire will strongly prioritize finding and rescuing people who might be still in the building during any actual structure fire. This is a major component of their job.

Fire people won't arrive in the course of one elevator run and actually half the deal with "don't use elevators" is supposed to be "leave it for people who need it in the emergency" which is both fire AND disabled people.

[1000-life-hacks]

[archeologist-prophet]

Lovely to see we have spaces where you can gain access to so much literature!

[scaryscarecrows]

Gotham hates Blüdhaven. They didn’t used to; this literally happened overnight, a few years ago, when Nightwing popped up there.

Because.

Well.

It’s Dick. Those flips and awful puns are REALLY distinctive, and it took one (1) crappy phone video of This Mysterious New Vigilante for Gotham to collectively go, “YOU STOLE OUR ROBIN, YOU SHITHEADS. AND YOU DON’T EVEN APPRECIATE HIM, LIKE WE DO.”

(This extends to Nightwing himself. If he dares set foot back in Gotham for too long, somebody will bust out the ‘WELCOME HOME, CHEATER’ sign and hang it off the balcony. There are multiple signs. Red Hood has been known to help repair them.)

[edenofmisfortune]

A cat is sleeping in a bush outside my window!! 😭 💙

[edenofmisfortune]

Baby woke up 💙

[edenofmisfortune]

A cat is sleeping in a bush outside my window!! 😭 💙

[hagihino]

[hagihino]

[genericpuff]

Congrats on the progress of your sourdough starter! I recently tried making a starter, but something about it felt wrong, so I decided I’d restart, but haven’t yet. Would you mind sharing the ratios you used?

This is the recipe I used! It follows a 1:1 ratio of flour + water, and directs you to do daily feedings.

Some notes / tips:

1.) This recipe claims that your sourdough should start rising and be fully mature by Day 7-8. This is an extreme expectation that will only discourage you when it doesn't rise that fast. My starter's just started rising after about 2 weeks of regular nightly feedings which is a more accurate average for most people, for some though it can take as long as 4 weeks.

2.) Whatever time of day you do feedings doesn't matter, just try to keep it consistent for the bacterial cycles. I'm getting by just fine with daily feedings so far, but some people opt to do every 12 hours (twice a day), you can adjust it as needed as you go along, just keep the feeding times consistent.

3.) That recipe calls for whole wheat / rye in the beginning, but you can get away just fine with all-purpose if that's all you have (such was the case for me because I don't bake with whole wheat / rye and I wasn't gonna go out of my way to buy a bag of it just to feed my starter lmao)

4.) While a lot of recipes (including the one above) use cups as measurements, the ratios are best done by weight, so get yourself a kitchen scale! Preferably one that can switch between grams and millilitres as you'll need both for weighing flour and water respectively.

5.) You might see your sourdough rise as early as Day 2 or 3. This rise is a lie whispered by the bacterial storm happening inside the jar, do not trust it. Your starter isn't actually mature until it rises consistently multiple days in a row; this first rise within the first few days will not repeat itself so quickly.

6.) Following the bacterial storm (if it happens for you at least, it did for me) expect a dormancy period to occur. This will involve days of daily discarding and feeding, without any progress whatsoever. You will get impatient. You will get discouraged. You must resist the urge to give up or restart. This is where I gave up the first time I tried making a starter last year, and it's where a lot of other folks tend to give up too. It might feel at times like you've "killed" your starter, but so long as there isn't straight up mold growing in it, then it's fine! It just needs time. Have patience, trust the process, give the bacteria time to form. It's a war of evolution in there - the weak will die and the strong will survive and form the basis for your starter, but that can only happen if you give the bacteria time to duke it out, even if it takes longer than you initially expected.

7.) Temperature was one of my biggest issues as I live in Canada, in a drafty old apartment with terrible insulation, where we've been experiencing lousy Smarch weather. This probably contributed to the slow rising for my starter. After a week I wound up putting my starter on the bathroom windowsill because it was the only room in the house that we keep the heat running 24/7 (and it's small and well-contained so the heat doesn't escape as easily). Even if it's unconventional, if it works, it works.

I realize that was prolly a lot more than you asked for but a lot of it is what I learned working on mine, and also googling my questions every time something seemed off or wrong LOL I hope it helps you! Good luck!!