All Mirth No Matter

twenty-seven. immune to poison ivy.

[doublism]

religious people: thank you god for inventing the thing i love it soso much <3333

atheists: its seriously incredibly beautiful that aliens invent things like. someone came up with the idea for the thing. howw.

agnostics: no one knows where the thing came from

[1892]

he needs mouse bites to live

[1892]

the most legendary gif maybe ever

[heavenslittlemachine-deactivate]

Is This Ethical?: new survey shows millennials want rudolph the red nose reindeer to be renamed Klonopin the Crust Punk Horse

[sheherlockholmes]

[whitepeopletwitter]

[movietonight]

Link to listicle

[only-tiktoks]

[deerdroo]

Translation:

Hey, people. Today we're cooking a little puppy to serve with the rice we have over there. We let it simmer for a while.

Ten minutes later, there it is, a bit brown, we stir it a little and let it simmer for another 10 minutes.

Now it must be almost done... Yeah, it's almost done to perfection. I'm gonna give it 5 seconds more... Uh? My mother's calling, I'm gonna check what does she want.

Oh, damn it...! I left it like 5 minutes... (gasps) it's burned, it's burned it'sburnedit'sburnedit'sburned. We'll have to leave this recipe for other day. No, look how it ended up! it's charred, completely charred

[meangirlnurse]

anyone else remember being a child and seeing the very neat handwriting of other little girls and somehow knowing that you were a different genre of person than they were

[lunarconception-deactivated2021]

literally no…i remember seeing bad handwriting & thinking “oh these other kids must be orphans or something”

[meangirlnurse]

fascinating to hear from the other genre, thanks for your contribution

[holyviolence]

WATCHED IN 2023: Their goal is to accumulate great personal wealth. It can only be achieved by injury to others. They can cause suffering, sickness, and even the death of those who, for whatever reason, offended them. 

SUSPIRIA (1977) DIR. DARIO ARGENTO

[anacoluthas]

ur telling me a masc king taped this?

[wingdingle]

[bluewatermarshes]

[frozenfire-flamingwater]

this ruined my week 

[toastbutteregg]

[radiofreederry]

[parkchanwoohoo]

Every time someone says "ingredients" I say "ingredience" in response and then I realize I just sound like I repeated them because it sounds the fucking same out loud

[love-alheli]

me when i say inch resting

[dreg-heap]

Can't let British people have air conditioning because first they'd call it something twee like "the climate fixer" and then in 20 years they'll call it "the climb" or "the climmy"

[dreg-heap]

French kids would call it "le climot", frustrating language officials who would prefer they call it "machine pour le contrôle du climat froide à l'interieure de l'édifice"

[gerardpilled]

He deleted it so quickly but I need everyone to see this Chris Fleming video because it has fundamentally changed me

[997]

I’m losing my fucking mind