eiayoh

💜🪼🌺 07 | SEA | 🇵🇭 | BS Biology student | Trying to be creative | Wannabe content creator

[eiayoh]

Make death proud to take us.

[eiayoh]

I’ve been stress free for a month and now I’m fixing my enrollment requirements. I hate being stressed.

[randomreasonstolive]

Reason to Live #14318

Because I deserve it.

  – Guest Submission

(Please don't add negative comments to these posts.) 

[wishingformemoria]

just because someone can articulate their point better doesn’t make them right, it makes them articulated. 

[wishingformemoria]

and you aren’t stupid for having trouble articulating yourself.

[andre-30008]

[notoriousmasc]

[randomreasonstolive]

Reason to Live #14281

because help is out there. not always in the way you expect. sometimes its a shower chair, sometimes its the worlds simplest cookbook, and sometimes its a stranger who compliments your hair.

  – Guest Submission

(Please don't add negative comments to these posts.) 

[eiayoh]

I haven’t been able to vlog consistently for some time now, probably because I felt uncomfortable with my body and behavior — not because of appearance or etiquette but because for the longest time, I never had an explanation for why I am the way that I am.

I am figuring it out right now, step by step, diagnosis by diagnosis, and I’m starting to be more comfortable with the way that I am now that I have an explanation.

[sickfrr]

[aforgottennotebook]

Pcos being renamed to pmos is fitting because it's Pissing Me Off Syndrome

[deusben]

"not all cops" is almost worse than "not all men"

[randomreasonstolive]

Reason to Live #14236

There are still more random bug facts to learn.

  – Guest Submission

(Please don't add negative comments to these posts.) 

[thevo1dosphere]

[eiayoh]

I finally got that MDD diagnosis!

[eiayoh]

I already have 2 powerbanks and have another one on the way.

Now, the reason there's another one on the way is because it's specifically a pill type powerbank. The two I already have are brick powerbanks that for some reason don't work with my type C to lightning cables. I have tried numerous cables, it just doesn't work. I opted for a pill type as the one I found on sale at Goojodoq eliminates the need for any cables at it already has a built in lightning and type C plug. However, the 10000 mAh ones are out of stock, so I opted for the 5000 mAh instead.

Since it's only 5000 mAh and my phone's battery is in dire need of replacement making its battery life shorter than I am tall, I plan on charging the pill with the bricks. That way, my phone never dies.

[eiayoh]

My psychiatric consultation has to be moved because the exact day of my schedule is now a non-working holiday by fucking Malacanang.

[eiayoh]

These damn allergies.

[samsedayon]

I don't even know how to explain what's happening in the Philippines right now. I really don't.

There are days when you open the news and it just hits different. Not in a "wow this is wild" way but in a "why are we like this" way. A shootout inside the senate building. A senator wanted by the ICC who keeps appearing and disappearing like a bad dream. Another senator caught on record saying hide the CCTV footage. And on top of all that, an impeachment trial for the sitting vice president. This is not a political thriller on Netflix. This is Tuesday.

And the worst part is you're not even surprised anymore. That's what gets me. The bar has been lowered so many times that chaos in the halls of government just feels like background noise now. We've been conditioned to just absorb it and move on, because what else can you do? You go to work, you commute, you pay your bills, and somewhere in Manila, people with actual power over your life are out here acting like extras in a teleserye.

I get why people want to leave. I really do. When you look at all of this and then think about what it costs just to live a decent life here, the thought crosses your mind. It's embarrassing to admit but it does. Not because you don't love the country, but because you're tired of loving something that keeps getting let down by the people who were supposed to take care of it.

But then. I don't know. There's still something that makes you stay, or at least makes you hope. Maybe it's the people around you. The ones who still show up, still care, still get angry because anger means they haven't given up. Maybe that's enough to hold onto for now.

I hope things get better. Genuinely. Not in a naive way, but in the way that you hope for something even when you're not sure it's coming. Because the alternative is deciding it's hopeless, and I'm not ready to do that yet.

[eiayoh]

Everyday is a day closer to my psychiatric consultation. Everyday I get a little bit more scared.

Because what if there’s nothing wrong with me? What if I don’t have a solution to my problems? What if I’m just a problem myself?