ellie

Still alive, barely breathing

[milanesa42]

“The employees need a larger salary” “hmmmm large celery”

[chiarrara]

why was messi lowkey serving saddam hussein hiding spot

[fairycosmos]

my dead wife. the ad free internet

[fairycosmos]

watching dreamily recorded footage of a web forum from 2003

[childsacrifice]

(no beers in) So how do you perceive me in the privacy of your thoughts

[i-am-a-fish]

I just want to love and be loved. why is lunch twelve dollars now

[coyoteobsessed]

[prokopetz]

Flavours of unreliable narrator:

Lying to the reader

Lying to themselves

Simply misinformed

Not paying attention

Has weird priorities

Assumed you knew

Hates you personally

Bad at communicating

Easily sidetracked

Will believe anything

Has weird prejudices

Just kind of dumb

[napoleononthebellerophon]

omg you people can do everything

[loveridden1999]

thank god complaining is free #mycomplaints

[sandmandaddy69]

[konoko]

[escuerzoresucitado]

[phoebebyers]

[pearlpoet]

post-post clarity when you're looking at your post on the dash like who gives a fuck. delete

[cheerfullycatholic]

When medicine is holding the migraine back but you can still kinda feel it in the distance waiting to return

[madame-helen]

[jumbo-the-mumbo]

[probablybadrpgideas]

Rarer D&D alignments

Bastard Good: You make the world better for people but in a really obnoxious way so everyone low-key hates you for it

Chaotic Dead: You set yourself on fire at the start of each session

Informed Evil: you're wearing a red cape and cackling so we kind of assume you've probably done some bad things off screen, right?

Lawful Pointless: You follow the rules of chess in every situation you find yourself in.

False Neutral: HAHA FOOLS! I WAS NO DRUID! I WAS A PALADIN ALL ALONG!

Lawful Anxious: You follow very strict laws but you don't know what those laws are or if you're breaking them.

Personal Evil: rather then making things worse for sapient life, you work to make things worse for Steve specifically. Everyone else is fine.

Centrist Neutral: "I don't support The Chained God Tharizdun breaking free and unmaking all reality but if we stop him through force we're just as bad as he is. Did you know there's actually zero difference between good and bad things?"

Sponsored Good: You provide justice, compassion and the great taste of subways sandwiches! Put in the code SMITETHESINNERS when ordering online for 20% off!

Sexy Lawful: You follow very strict rules but in such a way we kind of suspect you're getting off on it.

Chaotic Incidental: You act completely randomly but by sheer chance your actions turn out identical to if you followed very strict rules.

Theoretical Good: You want to do good things to help the world and once you stop binging Netflix you're absolutely going to.

Ugly Neutral: None of the other alignments want to hang out with you so you're neutral by default

Chaotic Meta: You pointedly refuse to follow the rules of the game you're playing.

Thirsty Evil: Look, orcs are hot, ok?