#happypridemonth
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"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
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@elsonambulo
#happypridemonth
idk guys i know we all want him to join the cens and chill out and go apeshit sometimes but do we really think thereās a world in which shane hollander, after being outed, lets his foot off the gas even a little?? now that winning is arguably even more important and frankly more difficult than it ever was?? when, if he cant build a legacy and a record for himself thatās absolutely tectonic, heās just gonna be known forever as ilya rozanovās bottom??
I think it's actually vitally important to Shane that he win more cups with Ottawa than he did with Montreal
you know that, post-coming out, compilations start popping up online from years of nhl mic'd up promos that nobody ever thought twice about before that mostly consist of shane saying "microphone" when ilya skates up to him.
I'm actually not done talking about Shane playing Never Have I Ever. On several occasions one of the Centaurs says something Shane's never heard of before, and when he asks what it is Ilya shakes his head and says, "just drink."
ilya's silly april fools "shane is pregnant š" post with shane's comment "not with playoffs around the corner. abortion"
during the situationship years shane feels so sick and jealous and hot under the collar when rozanov tells all his boys āgood job i love youā after games. like truly just a nauseating combination of feelings swirling. itās like heās being blended in a blender.
@aslongasitsblack your tags are immaculate, thank you. my pedestal hashtag my pedestal, yes I agree
[about to fall asleep] I do think Shane could cum just from Ilya fucking his throat
it's el muchacho shane monday
heated rivalry is awesome because ilya's constantly like i'm a sick bitch i like freak sex but gets scared the minute he gets a little smoochie meanwhile shane is like i'm normal i'm normal and he's five seconds from reinventing free use just out of his own beautiful mind
I just know Ilya is obsessed with the Sweet Caroline thing
#bro was flabbergasted New clip from Interview With the Vampire Season 3
there are many reasons why bruise kink is a big fat win for hollanov. but v important is that, though leaving identifiable sex marks is expressly forbidden by the Homophobic Powers That Oversee Shane's Anxiety, if shane shows up to metros optional morning skate with the same bruise on his obliques that everyone saw yesterday after the game, but today its aggravated, pulsing purple and red and maybe abraded in spots, that's literally fine. they're just gonna think he slept on it wrong or the bruise got worse over night. classic. normal. happens every day to every man in homoerotic ice life.
they will NOT ā think that the bruise is aggravated because ilya put his mouth on it and sucked at it for an hour (until shane sobbed like a hurt lil coyote and came so hard he sorta blacked out), to complete the check ilya began during the game by putting shane into the boards in the first place and causing this beautiful bruise (foreplay)! but that is what happened (what they planned) š and this IS how we get all of the benefits without any of the worries. soothing possessive pain kink for hungry coyote and his tundra predator. in public and private. so considerate. so mindful. so hockey. so eviscerating.
like! testing the limits of what people will clock as a hockey bruise and a sex bruise is soooo hot!!!
shane gets into a scrum where someone drags him down to the ice by his collar and doesn't let go and he ends up w a ragged neck bruise and near whiplash. and he's staring at the growing dark puce line of the bruise in the locker room mirror post shower. launching himself at his phone. texting with shaking hands: be fucking ready
lily replies in less than a minute: where is it lily: pic jane: i'm in the fucking locker room. just. be ready. 40 minutes lily: pic. lily: pic pic pic jane: fuck's sake lily: no. my sake. now. jane: [shitty bathroom stall picture of the bruising blooming around the base of his neck] lily: i kill sebby for this lily: i fuck you in this stall bare lily: bite until your blood drip on floor
and shane knocks his head against the stall door and reaches down --
lily: do not jerk off.
shane groans and grips himself.
lily: no. lily: my sake only
and shane lets go and gets the hell out of dodge and to ilya's house for his (and ilya's) just desserts (sucking, fucking, bloodletting).
and maybe hayds does notice! he gets upset on shane's behalf before practice the next day, bc "what the fuck did sebbin do, man. that's fucked," and shane has been flushed the whole morning, shrugs a shoulder and focuses on tying his skates with his neck bruised to hell, splotchy and aching with every move, and just says, "it's okay, i asked for it. it's the game."
i know shane can be kind of insecure in the books but to me this is reidās failure at scrying. because i think shane knows heās the best at hockey he knows full well heās the best to ever do it. and the anxiety doesnāt come from him wondering if heās the best but from him being aware heās not allowed to make the mistakes that normal people make. he has to hold himself to perfection so so tightly and then of course under that is an endless well of resentment and rage that he has to perform at this inhuman level to be taken seriously, when heās the BEST and he knows it.
like ilya is so permanently cancelled. thatās important to me. itās 2014 and people are @ing him to ask if heās a feminist and heās responding āof course, i love when woman is on top.ā he is name searching himself to make fun of his haters for not having custody of their kids. he is posting sports journalistsā DUI mugshots. he is snapchatting himself in russia for the summer wrestling with someoneās pet tiger. menace does not begin to cover it.
the way i know, in my heart of hearts, that they have done this at least twice off the ice without helmets and have had to awkwardly walk away from each other, with bruised heads, having said nothing bc they can never admit what just happened
yes & no by natalie wee
the setup and the shot