A Woman of a Certain Age

25 yo french boy, he/him, Leo, tired and very gay.

[catchymemes]

[noccolibroccoli]

So I had a hysterectomy today (hooray!) and I brought along my stuffed orca, Shamu, as a comfort object. And everyone i interacted with during my pre-op was like "Oh! Who's this?" so I was telling them all about him, how he's been with me since I was 9 and gone on every single vacation and road trip, and they were telling me about their own stuffed buddies (one lady said she still has hers after 40 years!) and all of this while I was signing consent forms and providing a list of the things I'd brought with me, you know, small talk.

So then a nurse comes over and goes "Okay, I've got some stickers I'll put on your things so we know they're yours" and I'm like "OK cool" so she puts a sticker on my coat and stickers on my bags of clothes and then she turns to Shamu and I'm like "oh I guess he gets a sticker too"

But no. She pulls out a hospital bracelet that's an exact copy of mine and slaps it on his tail, like so:

And i was delighted by this, so I took a picture to send to my friends, who were equally delighted, and were cracking me up with their reactions (like so:)

Anyway, they take me back and put me under, and when I awake groggily a few hours later it takes me a minute to get my bearings, so I don't notice Shamu at first. But then I realize he's tucked up next to me in the gurney, so I grab him, and my hand touches gauze.

And I'm like "huh?" so I look at him and I realize

They gave my fucking orca a hysterectomy

[ceeberoni]

you have to understand the glass shattering over my head i felt when THIS was the first message i saw from noa after his surgery

[dionysvs-deactivated20241227]

[the-walrus-squad]

[subarupaul]

saw this on twitter and thought y’all might enjoy this

[junk-thunder]

one thing no one ever teaches you is that you can just make things nicer and more intentional- you can take your energy drink, pour it in a rocks glass over ice with a slice of lime on the rim, and sip it slow. and you'll think, "wow i am the biggest faggot to have ever lived". and you know what? you're right.

[junk-thunder]

tumblr users get your own post challenge [impossible]

[lesbianralzarek]

wasnt a failed assassination. it was a successful long-range ear piercing by a deranged claires employee. they force femmed him. because of woke

[thedankmemes]

[treecitysessions]

I keep thinking abt this comment and giggling

[cryptotheism]

I'm fascinated by how the formatting of different social media sites affect how text is read.

For instance, a line break on Tumblr indicates a new idea.

[cryptotheism]

But a reblog break indicates that time has passed.

[cryptotheism]

[neosatsuma]

[sayruq]

[dragoncarrion]

Anytime i see a bunch of pride flags i have to restrain myself from saying "where mexico" bc i doubt anyone will know I'm referencing this

[tortol]

picture i got at pride last week; here mexico

[ellie-insertsurnamehere]

This is very dumb but hey

[georgedontdothat]

how?? just how?

[wkdwtchoftheest]

@jooshthepunished

[jooshthepunished-deactivated202]

[ow-my-skin]

Glasses people love to make you try their glasses on to see how fucked up their eyes are. It's a sign of respect in their culture.

[memorycycle]

[kragehund-est]

i hate when i send someone a meme in another language and they're like "uhm... translate? 😒" fucker i sent you a meme where 90% of the words have an english cognate and/or you don't need to know what they're saying to find it funny. can you at least TRY

[kragehund-est]

i sent this meme to 7 people, and 4 of them asked me to translate for them. i legitimately do not think that was necessary.

[vickythestrange]

[overlyactivepingpongball]

[lesbian-toddhoward]

[lesbian-toddhoward]

never forget the elijah wood wigs interview

[capyclub]

Happy Do You Wear Wigs Wednesday