emily | 24

emily | 19

[fizzfags]

how it feels to wash your hair and brush your teeth and have clean clothes on

[doomdaysdecays-deactivated20251]

ooooo you wanna take a shower so bad

[vampireopossum]

[brilliantpines]

do you guys remember when we used to say oh worm all the time. remember that

[brilliantpines]

is anybody out there

[acakewalkofcrocodiles]

[marcitlali]

[quinoaphoenicks]

me after smoking half a bowl and drinking one bourbon on a weeknight

[marcitlali]

me after taking Yak tranquilizers in a berlin warehouse

[smallrat36wagon-deactivated2021]

you need to change your life styles or you might pass away .

[catgirlcadaver-deactivated20241]

🐸 boss ✅✅ follow

sometimes I pull on it so hard, I rip the skin!

42.8 Million notes

[pathologising]

ok well im going to build a good future for myself whether i like it or not

[pathologising]

literally this

[ewaneneollav]

ok (powerpoint transition to a photo of your gravestone)

[crebermatrix-deactivated2023080]

Rule #1 stick to the fucking bit

[sashaforthewin]

Rule #2 no kissing on the mouth and don't fall in love

[tatzelwurming]

Rule #3 no man left behind

[lizardsister]

fruit fly diving straight toward the glass of apple cider vinegar mixed with dish soap already littered with the corpses of his kin

[xaveria]

noticed my coworker was on tumblr so i told them “i like your shoelaces” and they said “never say that out loud to me”

[xaveria]

this is the correct response btw

[yuckyrat-deactivated20200413]

I just remembered that when I was like 6 I had a dream where I heard a very tiny “hello!” and I looked and it was this tiny white puffball and it looked like this

[samophillia]

that was god

[parakeet]

*transports guinea pigs from point A to point B with my mind*

[friendshapedhuman]

Marzipan asks that you not interrupt her nap with your telepathic powers again thank you

[parakeet]

marzipan i am so fcking sorry ill never forgivve myself for doing this to you im so so fcking sorry

[gayvampyr]

[cutelootsuit]

i want there to be a dhmis comic series so they can pull funny comic gags like this

[vympr]

*lotions you* *lotions you* *lotions you* *lotions you* *lotions you* *lotions you*

[anneemay]

[swagveryswagamazinf]

tjem

[time-woods]

I want to scramble them like eggs I swear to god

[nitw]

over the garden wall really just aired its 10 episodes once in 2014 leaving a whole generation with irreversible damage and then fucked off never to be seen again