Brainwave Playground Lab

Artist, magician, scientist, alien, swan, milk, hunger, 4.87×10²⁴ kg, 463 °C Personal blog https://humanfursuit.tumblr.com/

[humanfursuit]

My art account @employeeofthemonth

💒🩻🩸🦢📌🌀🎀

Currently into Lestat, Sparks, Creep/Creep 2, also aliens and some spiritual and kinky stuff 🙂‍↕️

[fandiagnosis]

THE VAMPIRE LESTAT 3.6 | 3.7

[employeeofthemonth]

This is so important to me

At first Monster = nothing can be done, it is what it is, claim it and move on

Then

Monster = you actively hurt someone because you choose to

“Until you make your unconscious conscious, it will rule your life and you will call it fate.”

[employeeofthemonth]

Book!Lestat is so goofy sometimes, no matter how awful everything around him is

[employeeofthemonth]

Book!Lestat is so goofy sometimes, no matter how awful everything around him is

[employeeofthemonth]

[employeeofthemonth]

[employeeofthemonth]

❤️‍🩹

[employeeofthemonth]

Oh, Lestat, you motherfucker, you got my attention again

[employeeofthemonth]

He is a _literal_ Angel!

Ignore all the bodies

[employeeofthemonth]

Idk if anyone noticed that, but in the last episode Armand noted to Lestat that he is an early riser when he woke up, and then we saw Lestat losing his mother because he woke up later than her and not noticing her leave

Sounds like someone is an anxious sleeper now

Wanted to point that out

[lioncunt]

the very idea that someone could sit down, watch lestat puke while still trying to rationalize the abuse, have a full blown panic attack over it when louis yells that there is no rationalizing this, and then go say it's consensual...that it's not portrayed as abuse...insane...

i also think a lot of people aren't really getting the *point* of louis' reaction. it's extremely harsh and judgmental and completely insensitive to the fact that lestat is being abused, but that is the purpose of it. the entire season is lestat attempting to justify it. this is louis saying that you cannot justify it. there is no rational way to justify that happening. and when lestat has a breakdown over it, they both sort of realize at the same time that this means lestat has been suffering incestuous sexual abuse for 200 fucking years.

it overwhelms lestat, and it clicks for louis. that's when he changes tacts, when he comforts lestat, when he gently tries to help him admit that it's been abuse all along in the bar. it's so realistic, such a necessary sequence.

i think there is unfortunately a knee jerk reaction people have to abuse like this, esp when it's mother/son, where it's just "gross", "weird", or "sick", as louis says. where the child is not taken to be a victim, somehow. i think the show is very honest in having this be louis' initial reaction, until he sees lestat's panic, until he properly thinks it through for a second. and then he gets it, and he feels horrible about what he said. again, it's just all very realistic and bittersweet. everyone involved did an incredible job with this storyline imo.

[lou-of-my-life]

additionally, that very instinct louis is informed by his own trauma from the 77 year abuse under armand.

they're both deeply traumatised individuals who kicked into defense mode simultaneously after that tape was leaked.

lestat, who always knew something is off about his dynamic with his mother, wanted to justify it and not face the ire of louis' judgement cause that would make him see the truth of the matter. his own mother, the person who made him, doesn't love him.

and for louis, who was fed lies and had memories altered to the point his sense of self is fractured, who had to live and be intimate with a partner who hid information from him, had to once again find out his first partner, who also had a habit of lying to him, might've deceived him for over a century in this regard. its in his specific words about having her portrait over their coffins (marital bed). the mother looming over them was alive and was actually intimate with lestat in a way louis was. that is his point.

the moment they looked at each other, it clicked and they reached one another. they're all that matters to each other at the end of the day.

[employeeofthemonth]

If you were this afraid of endless infinite loneliness, would you fuck the only close person you had, if that was the only way to keep them close?

Even if that is your mother?

Even if she was cruel and cold?

Would you become completely detached from the humanity because she wanted to end it and needed someone to do that with?

She wasn’t giving him love and closeness he needed unless it was sexual, unless he was as cruel as her, so… He had to rationalize it to himself why he had to be okay with that, until he was, to have it, even just a bit.

And it makes sense he was so distraught with her leaving him time and time again without a warning, because even that wasn’t enough, even that didn’t give him security, no amount of him was enough for her to stay and love him

Fucked

Fucked to infinity

[employeeofthemonth]

Wife

[employeeofthemonth]

About Gabriella and Lestat

This is so important to be that they thought it through so deeply, cause I felt it all without them articulating it in the show and I really appreciate him commenting on that too

[employeeofthemonth]

More Lestat

[employeeofthemonth]

And this little experiment to stylize him

[employeeofthemonth]

Wip

My extensive research was worth it

[employeeofthemonth]

God, I only read a little over 100 pages of The Vampire Lestat, and Lestat cried so much about everything, everything that happened to him, to his mother, even about the witches who were burned many, many years ago before he was born, even about Magnus who burned himself and left him alone.

He cares so deeply about everything, about being good, about making people happy and lifting them out of sorrow.

And I think about the Lestat Louis saw.

Impenetrable face, cold, arrogant, cruel, he laughs when he's hurt.

Perfect and strong.

Facade.

And again, Lestat in the third season (don’t know what the book!Lestat is like yet) where he tells the story himself: every emotion, pain, and experience is written all over his face again. He has a panic attack, he's vulnerable, he's scared, he cries, he fails over and over, he is stuck, pathetic, he tries hard to gain love and no one cares.

When he is in pain - he is in pain and you see it.

And I wonder.

Is this what's going on inside him? Can't people see it? Is he aware of his pain and confused why no one else cares? Did his actions toward Louie feel completely fair to him because he was sure Louie was being cruel to him intentionally because he thought his pain was obvious?

While really he couldn’t open up at all?

While no one actually saw that?

[employeeofthemonth]

Book!Lestat looking in awe at the rotting tortured corpses that look identical to him and book!Nicki playing the violin