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@fantabulousfelix
hopefully i'll get to do something other than endure soon. that would be really nice
One massive, legitimate way to improve as a writer or artist or in any creative endeavor really, is to become absolutely obsessed with something and to allow yourself to be weird about it. Genuinely mean this btw.
It's literally doing the exact opposite!! Currently!!
I am actually so serious I think it really messes with a childs creativity and joy to tell them to never make a mary sue OC. Like that unbridaled form of joy where you make a self insert OC who super cool and everyone loves them and they have every superpower in the world SHOULD be something a kid makes, it nourishes their ability to create things for fun and not be stifled by "oh but what if my character is too overpowered and cringey...". whatever
“They’re not smarter or faster they’re buying up others’ lifetimes to do their chores”
“They’re not smarter or faster they’re buying up others’ lifetimes to do their chores”
“They’re not smarter or faster they’re buying up others’ lifetimes to do their chores”
[images: series of tweets from @realavocadofact. tweets read, “they’re not elite they’re rich”, “they’re not better they’re better supplied”, “they’re not smarter or faster they’re buying up others’ lifetimes to do their chores”, “there is nothing wrong with you; you’re doing your best in a game rigged against you, probably not enough people and fruit tell you that”]
I see this reaction a lot, and I gotta say, it always makes me a little sad. Whenever the conversation of exploitation of labor comes up, inevitably someone finds themselves struggling with the guilt of “It is so important to me not to contribute to exploitation but I cannot do this thing myself and need someone else to do it for me, so how do I even approach that?”
Exploitation isn’t in the hiring of a service worker. Exploitation is in the respect you show them for their ability to perform the service you need from them.
I have been on a cleaning service staff before, and also been someone who hired a cleaning service, and I can tell you for sure that a lot of cleaning crews (especially worker owned ones) absolutely LOVE their clients and are genuinely happy to be able to make their lives better. The clients they don’t like? Those are the ones who disrespect the workers.
When I was involved with a cleaning service, we had everything from little old ladies living alone to McMasions with five cars as clients, and I can assure you that whenever there was someone who clearly hired us because they were overwhelmed or unable to keep their space clean, those were the households where you put a little more elbow grease in and did a deep clean even when it wasn’t paid for, because you could see how much these people were trying and struggling, and they were always so kind and generous and often embarrassed when talking to you about the job.
I only hired a service a couple if times in my life, but whenever I did, I worked with the same people as often as I could, tipped as well as I could afford, and tried to be the kind of client I would want to have, and that’s how I often ended up with my baseboards cleaned too, or my fridge scrubbed and organized or a restorative clean done in a high use room even when that wasn’t what I had scheduled or paid for.
I’ve heard the same thing from all manner of service workers over the years. Many of us like our jobs! We enjoy the work. It’s the customers that can do a number on you.
I think a lot of people are afraid that by needing a service they are inherently exploiting or harming the people who perform that service, and they really aren’t. But it does benefit a capitalist system for us to all be burnt out and overwhelmed because we’re too afraid to hire the help we need. Be upfront and honest with service workers about what you need and why you need it, and treat them with dognity and kindness while they perform your service, and I promise you they will always be happy to answer your call.
HIRING A PROFESSIONAL TO CLEAN YOUR HOUSE ISN’T MORE EXPLOITATIVE THAN GOING TO A DENTIST OR ORDERING A PIZZA
We all fucking depend on each other, it’s about respect and treating one another as fellow humans instead of seeing them as below us
There is a huge difference between specialists helping make people’s lives easier, or even livable at all, and the way the rich purchase people’s lives for convenience.
When you pay a cleaner decently for helping clean your house, a little less labor gets spent on cleaning because somebody who’s really good at it is doing it. And that kind of labor specialization is what enables us to have enough available resources and labor to do things like care for disabled people. Which is basically the core of what makes any society a worthwhile project, the ability to make people’s lives better in ways we otherwise wouldn’t be able to.
When a rich person buys a mansion that takes 50 people a year to build, that requires a full-time cleaner and two full-time gardeners to keep maintained, and they pay a dedicated nanny to do nothing but take care of their and a dedicated chef to do nothing but prepare their fancy meals or be available on call all day, that’s not what’s happening. Because that rich person is not reducing the amount of work other people need to do by multiple lifetimes. They are leveraging an economically unbalanced system to drain people’s lives for convenience.
The world doesn’t have to be a perfect quid pro quo, in fact it shouldn’t be. It is a good and worthwhile thing when people dedicate their lives to caring for people who wouldn’t be able to care for themselves, including when it takes multiple people’s lifelong labors to keep somebody else alive and well cared for. The whole damn point of having a more efficient labor system is freeing up labor for that. It makes the world a better place. But that’s exactly why what rich people do is so heinous. They could live perfectly happy lives on a tiny fraction of the labor they extract from others. But they deliberately make choices which spend our societies’ labor less efficiently, for very petty amounts of convenience, in ways that prevent other people from getting the labor they need to be happy.
This might be a hot take but I think if I click the button that says "unsubscribe from emails" then I should fucking be unsubscribed from the emails
Movement nudge, hand mobility! 🙌
X
1) do this even if you're under 40. seriously. I definitely should have been doing something like this for years and I only turned 40 a month and a half ago
2) if you're like me just now trying this going "oh god i've only done 15 and i think my hands are cramping" start lower than 30 and increase by 5 once whatever number you're doing no longer makes your hand cramp up. I can manage about 15 per exercise at the moment.
I remember years ago, long enough ago that I was still using either Tiktok or Instagram regularly, because that's where I saw this, long enough ago that unfortunately I do not remember the username, I saw an older trans woman responding to a comment asking "how come we see trans women from your generation, but never trans men?" And her response was simple. "Unfortunately, it's because most of them are dead." Between lack of safe and legal abortions (which, hey, look what's an issue again), the HIV/AIDs crisis (which still is lacking in approved treatments for trans men, and they're still likely to be denied PrEP/PEP even when they should be eligible as sexually active queer men), and how many of them chose to take their own lives after being forced into marriages and other women's roles, a lot of the trans men that should be elderly right now did not make it.
And now, when I find myself making the mistake of going on Instagram, I get to see trans men themselves talking about how historically, trans men didn't do anything for the community, and so we need to step up now. Which, first of all, that isn't true, but second of all, if trans men's contributions are lesser, that makes a lot of sense if we listen to that trans woman talking about the trans men she was in community with back in the day. It's very hard to advance the trans cause if you're not alive.
Anyway. It's a really chilling answer. "Where are all the elderly trans men?" "They're dead." And I just wish more people saw that tiktok and listened to it and really took it to heart, now that we're in the age of "well obviously trans men have it so much easier."
I can add that, anecdotally, in my personal life - all the trans men I know who are in their 50s, 60s, or older... are men who have transitioned only within the past 10 or 15 years. It's a pretty small sample size, and it's probably also a true statement for trans people more broadly.
But in light of the above, it feels... something. Telling. Heartbreaking. I'm in my 30s, and still closer to 30 than 40, and have personally experienced being the oldest, out trans man younger guys have ever seen.
the Cc in emails stands for Cuck chair
guys pls don't die from the heat i love playing tumblr with you
”money can’t buy happiness” was supposed to mean “prioritize things that make you actually happy over greed and material wealth” and not “stop fantasizing about being able to pay your medical bills”
12 years on and still the best articulation ever made of how one should respond to useless critiques
Phenomenal spare wheel cover I walked past the other day