nectar and salt

My name is Audrey | A goddamn wildfire

[endangered-justice-seeker]

PLEASE SHARE THIS USEFUL INFORMATION IT COULD SAVE LIVES

[tastefullyoffensive]

The end is nigh. (via darthlisterfiend)

[harrywantsababy]

I just watched a kid break down in the bookstore because his books for the semester totaled $600 and that’s the american university system in a nutshell

[therainbowprogrammer-deactivate]

I was on the verge of tears when I got to the cashier so yeah, that’s messed up

[nihilisme]

Go here and just, don’t waste any more money okay?

[angelicsongx]

YES. I FOUND THE THING, IF ANYONE DOESN’T HAVE MONEY FOR COLLEGE TEXT BOOKS LIKE ME, THEN GO HERE OKAY?

[fall-out-boy-imagines-and-stuff]

reblogging to remember and help for u guys

[krystal-prisms]

Yes please

[sadmac356]

let’s be honest here: I had a breakdown yesterday because I was afraid I wouldn’t be able to get food

[fandomsandfeminism]

Part of my roadtrip tool me to Atlanta. And, the Civil Rights Center was amazing. Very powerful. They have this one exhibit where you sit at a lunch counter and close your eyes and put on headphones. And It plays sounds like you are at a sit in and people are yelling. And it times how long you can sit there for. I think i lasted almost a minute before i was almost crying.

It…made its point.

[the-headless-vulcan]

And most of those people were being physically assaulted too

That’s a brilliant exhibit

[fandomsandfeminism]

If you make it long enough, the chair actually shakes a little, along with the sound of someone hitting the chair with a bat. It was super intense. (It included a trigger warning for obvious reasons.)

[alopiassupersillyosus]

What’s the address of this place? It’s now on my bucket list

[fandomsandfeminism]

100 IVAN ALLEN JR. BLVD Its right next to the aquarium and world of coca cola.

[aleena-jean-101]

What’s also really great is there’s an attendant too. If a person gets overwhelmed or has a panic attack the attendant will sit with them, console them, and give them tissues. AKA guess what happened to me when I used the headphones 

[jurasspark]

This is one of my favorite museums of all time. Last time I went there was an older couple (white girl and black guy) who I watched sit through it, and at the end they were crying and she hugged him, saying “I’m so sorry I wasn’t there with you”

[isitbatman]

lol our society is so structured on binaries that people think cats are the opposite of dogs

[bogleech]

we also regard dogs as “masculine” and cats as “feminine” to the point that it’s “weird” for men to love cats, women and gay men are stereotyped as liking cats, and creepiest of all, cats are stereotyped as “sexy” animals

[problemheart]

Im 100% grossed out by this

[witch--tripper-deactivated20160]

this fits into my confusion as to why it’s perfectly acceptable to hate cats but blasphemy to hate dogs

[dammit--cas]

That last comment just fucked me up

[ladyantiheroine]

People who believe this binary have never seen a chunky cat nor a poodle.

[featherdust]

I feel like it’s very telling for someone to like both cats and dogs rather than vehemently choosing one or the other

[calliopechild]

Saw this on fb and had to share.

[feministism]

[annerocious]

Dear Men Writers

Lesser known facts when writing women:

High heeled shoes don’t become flats if you break the heels off.

The posts of earrings aren’t sharp.

Nail polish takes a long time to dry and smudges when wet.

You can’t hold in a period like pee.

Inserting a tampon is not arousing or sexual in any way, ever.

Feel free to add your own.

[deliciouspineapple]

- Bras leave red marks on the skin under and around boobs and it is a magical experience when taken off.

- Make up can take anywhere from 5 to 25 minutes depending on how skilled you are.

- Taking hair out of a ponytail after wearing it for hours does not make it perfectly straight when it comes down.

- Hair when wet sticks to the skin it no longer flows, idiot.

-When women with long hair kiss, turn around, do anything, their hair falls in the way.

- Stockings are itchy and tear like wet paper bags.

[ivegotthetriforce]

- Pantyhose, tights, leggings, and stockings are each different. - Waxing hurts and leaves red skin for a while afterwards while shaving leaves stubble - Most can’t run in heels unless they have been VERY worn - Insecurity in appearance doesn’t mean “buy me a drink” - EVERYONE HAS DIFFERENT TASTES IN EVERYTHING

[drmistytang]

-Having large breasts sucks. It sucks beyond belief.  If a garment happens to fit your large chest, odds are it won’t fit the rest of you. Underboob sweat is real and terrible. Bending over for extended periods of time will tweak your back out. Running can be painful due to boob turbulence. Bras are hella expensive. Big breasts are not fun.

[angryschnauzer]

Putting a tampon in isnt a quick bend-poke-done kinda deal. It involves cubicle yoga, messy hands, numerous curse words as you realise it isnt in correctly and have to take it out and start again with a new one.

[cassiopeiassky]

Yes to all of this.  But also:

If her hair is in an updo, one does not simply remove a hairpin to send her hair cascading down her back.  No.  If her hair is an updo, it will take at least an hour and an extra set of hands to remove the 137 bobby pins that are holding her hair in place.  Furthermore, there’s probably a can’s worth of hairspray in there, intended to withstand category 2 hurricane winds.  There’s no cascading happening here - the best you can hope for is a misshapen nest of hair to clump and poof unattractively in the back while it still remains flat against her scalp.

[marvel-lucy]

This is one of the funniest posts I’ve seen in a while (especially if you read all the comments), but also really depressing because at 42 I still judge myself as having failed for not matching up to all these mythical stereotypes despite knowing they’re impossible

[valeria2067]

^^^This though

[musicalhell]

The odds of a woman having smoothly shaved legs and armpits are directly proportional to the amount of skin her clothing bares and/or the amount of fucks she gives at that particular moment.

GLASSES ARE NOT COSMETIC.  If we whip them off, we do not become gorgeous fashion models.  We become squinty.

[thatsnicebutimmarried]

-most women wear bras. Yes, even when they are trying to dress sexy. Because bras make boobs look perkier and rounder, which is something men apparently find sexy, so being a seductress or femme fatale is not an automatic reason for a female character to not be wearing a bra.

-a good bra will hide headlights, or at the very least drastically reduce their noticeability. A women with enough pointy nipple issues will opt for a padded or molded bra to hide them.

-women’s nipples do not automatically become hard pyramids visible through any and all layers of clothing the second they become even slightly aroused. They are not the female equivalent of boners. And even if their nipples do get hard, the bras they are almost certainly wearing (because even a goddamn succubus with big, honkin’ knockers for seducing men is gonna have those painful puppies in some kind of boob sling) should keep those pointy nipples from being visible to every other character in the scene, JIM BUTCHER. YES, EVEN LARA RAITH WOULD WEAR A BRA ONCE IN A GODDAMN WHILE.

[eldriitchmurmurs]

if you’re being tied up and tortured in a freezing underground dungeon, then you probably have more important things to pay attention to than how hard somebody’s nipples are, jim butcher

[jabberwockypie]

- Wearing a bra that doesn’t fit HURTS.  It’s not sexy to wear a bra that’s “two sizes too small”, it’d make your clothes hang oddly and you’d have a weird, uncomfortable “quad-boob” effect and your back would hurt, BEN AARONOVITCH.

[phantoms-lair]

Also, after removing a too small bra, there’s gonne be angry red lines on the boobs and ribs and the lady is not going to want them to be touched by anyone for a good long while

[everystarstorm]

-Not all women wear heels. Those things hurt and are hard to balance in. They can also mess up your feet and back pretty bad.

[hattedhedgehog]

-Lips aren’t just naturally red “as if she’d been drinking wine but they were just like that without makeup cause she’s so perfect,” my dear little Kvothe from ‘Name of the Wind’. Also, girls do not naturally smell like fruit or flowers, it’s either perfume or something she’d been eating recently.

[generalistherbalist]

I’ve been appreciating this post but now it’s back very specifically calling out my problematic faves and I don’t think those male authors realize how much it totally takes me out of the story for a moment when they commit these errors. It does nothing useful for the plot and is annoying for half of the audience

[lmorasey-deactivated20230917]

Is it weird that I’m female and wasn’t aware of a solid third of these?

[infinitelyblankpage]

I mean, all writes take note. I basically live in man land when it comes to protagonists so I don’t know half these things despite being a woman

[furryarbiterangel]

(Most) Women do not look at themselves in the mirror and compare their breasts to fruit. Any sort of fruit. Especially melons. Please save us from the melons.

Also we are not aware of our breasts at all times. I do not walk down a flight of stairs and think “oh golly my breasts are bouncing so much right now”. They are as much as natural part of our bodies as arms. Do you constantly think about how your arms are moving? Sure you may be aware of them, but paying full attention? Doubtful.

[dukeofbookingham-deactivated202]

Also: women working out are almost never sexy. They’re not glowing or glistening or (kill me) *sparkling*. They are red and sweaty and gross just like all the dudebros doing their time with the dumbbells. Stop ogling fictional women at the gym, TOM WOLFE.

[kerolunaticat]

I love this post.

[galadrieljones]

I never understood why men feel the need to address all this telltale “feminine” awareness when writing women. Like once in grad school one of my male colleagues wrote from a female character’s POV and was like sure to notice how her feet felt in high heels and all the women’s lifestyle magazines on the coffee table and also that like, her breasts were “heavy” or some shit. I write male characters all the time. Not once have I ever stopped to make sure they notice the weight of their own balls or been hyper aware of their chest hair or some bullshit like that. ????? why????????

[dusterthedopop-deactivated20250]

Love this. I’ve been cackling to myself for good 20 mins reading all the comments as well but the last reblog had me dying like can you imagine!!

“Chad was late. He had an important meeting to get to and was mad at himself for oversleeping.

He quickly washed and brushed his teeth and then ran downstairs, his balls bouncing playfully in his pants.

Do I have time to make a coffee? he thought. He decided he did so went into the kitchen and switched the kettle on. As he was waiting, he noticed his thick, curly chest hair was poking through the button gaps of his shirt. He giggled to himself and tucked his manly fuzz back in, hoping it wouldn’t happen during the meeting.”

Men, do you see how jarring and stupid this is!?

[vampireapologist-archive-deacti]

ppl are so annoying “you can’t paint ur bedroom pink you’re an adult” i did not spend my entire life waiting to grow up and control my life to paint my bedroom beige

[hojolove]

I had a sales woman in furniture store try and tell me not to buy a hot bubblegum pink loveseat because she wanted me to “think about the future”

Bitch, I am thinking about the future. I already got a hot bubblegum pink couch at home and now I need a loveseat to go with it.

[madgastronomer]

when I first bought my house, I announced my decision to paint my bedroom purple. I had wanted a purple bedroom for thirty damn years, you fucking bet I was gonna have one now. My friends decided, for some reason, that I meant what one of them referred to as “14 year old girl purple” (through what’s wrong with the colors a 14 year old girl chooses, I don’t know, even if they’re not what I want as an adult). They didn’t believe me until they saw the color on the actual wall, even thought they helped me pick out paints. My mother, meanwhile, decided to get worried that if I painted my bedroom a “dark purple”, it would be “depressing”. As if, with an entire house to live in, I would spend all my time in the bedroom, which I wanted to be dark because I would be sleeping in there. In the damn dark.

I had like one, maybe two friends who were all like FUCK YEAH YOU PAINT IT WHATEVER COLOR YOU WANT, PURPLE BEDROOMS ARE AWESOME.

But when they actualy saw the finished bedroom, every single one of them was like, “Oh yeah, that’s really pretty.” (Well, the ones who supported me from the beginning were more like WOOHOO.)

And the moral of the story is: Fuck ‘em, please yourself. Either they’ll come around, or you can safely ignore every question of taste they opine about for the rest of time.

[themintycupcake]

This applies to other adulting activities, too. When I was a kid, I decided that I wanted to have a wedding cake made of doughnuts. When I got older, I figured that I would be “mature” about it and get a traditional cake, which the older adults approved of. Now that I’m 25 and facing the possibility of actual marriage in the near future, I’m just like “marriage is a social construct but it comes with tax & insurance benefits, so just give me that goddamn doughnut cake.” If they don’t like it then they don’t have to come to my wedding.

[aridotdash]

https://xkcd.com/150/

[undanewneon]

I would like you all to view my office. I’m thirty and my rainbow room is awesome, people can fight me

[wilwheaton]

Do not look away.

[cutebearfrank-deactivated201907]

Ok dude its not they going to kill them like the Nazis calm down geez

[learningtoacceptchange]

If we do nothing now, we’re going to find out in a hundred years that they did. And then it will be a hundred years too fucking late.

Shut the fuck up and don’t look away.

[smitethestate]

A few months ago people were like “relax the immigrant detention centers aren’t going to become concentration camps.” People doing nothing and making excuses for their inaction and trying to convince others to do the same is exactly how death camps happen.

[hickeywiththegoodhair]

also people have actually died in there, due to ICE’s abuse and neglect. and those numbers are just gonna keep rising because bootlickers like tumblr user cutebearfrank say stupid shit like “it’s not so bad jeez” and look the other way so like DOUBLY SHUT THE FUCK UP

[lord-armitage]

The Nazis didn’t start building the gas chambers in 1933, they started using them eight years after gaining power. When the Nazis got into power, Hitler never said that he was going to commit genocide or try to murder all the Jews in Europe. The Nazis never said that they were going to build gas chambers. What they said was that the Jews were the cause of Germany’s decline, the lose of it’s empire, the failing economy, etc and they were going to stop that. They left it to to interpretation to how they would meet that end. Just like building a wall or banning Muslims, all the Nazis gave were the same vague statements that were easy to grasp and helped root the idea in people’s minds.  

By the way, the photo of Himmler up there was taken in 1942, nine years after the Nazis assumed power. The one of Pence is taken three years after Trump did. 

[decapitatedpuppies]

Fuck anyone who thinks that ICE and its ‘detention centers’ are acceptable. 

[ladyantiheroine]

Who the actual fuck sees children being caged and their first response is “calm down it’s not like they’re going to KILL them”

Please delete yourself.

[alwaysbewoke]

UNMUTE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!!!

[sweetcribs]

HHHAAAAAAAHAAHA!!

[mimikyyuu]

[ladyantiheroine]

The only sport I watch.

[featherdust]

EAT MY DUST, FUCK KNUCKLES!!!

[dyscomancer]

At this point there’s no excuse for a baby boomer to be technologically incompetent anymore. It’s just willful ignorance, this shit is not fucking hard

[dyscomancer]

“why is it asking for a password” because you’re logging into something martha, that’s how it’s been for the last 20 fucking years

“how do i do [x] can you show me” no dale you can Google it like the rest of us. it requires one exposure to the concept of googling to understand how it works. your generation was smart enough to cause a total economic collapse out of malice but not smart enough to type in a few words I guess

“im just not tech savvy” no you just refuse to learn because like in most things you are stuck in your ways

[dyscomancer]

the worst part is after you help an old fuck with some sort of tech bullshit 9 times out of 10 they’ll give you some kind of bullshit passive aggressive thank-you

like “oh i guess you young people have to know something about those phones you’re always on, huh?”

give me a fucking break gretchen i have depression from living in the economy you created and my phone is more of a reprieve than dealing with your stubborn inconsiderate ass

[dyscomancer]

AND ANOTHER THING that just gets my blood boiling is their ability to get into their settings, completely fuck things up, and then manage to develop total amnesia about how it happened

what do you mean you set your phone to japanese on accident, phil? there’s like 15 separate menus you have to navigate through to get there

“i think it’s because i got a virus” no greg it’s not a virus, the only viruses here are your rampant stupidity and the deadly pathogens carried by your unvaccinated grandchildren

[dyscomancer]

i just absolutely loathe that the people who decide if women should be executed for having abortions or not are the same people who can’t figure out how to work a blu-ray player with the instructions in front of them

[gigglygamer]

Your Simple Fantasy Name

Your first initial and the last two letters of your last name.

Tag yourself, I’m Ley.

[fisherrend]

HELLO I AM FRT

[wetwareproblem]

Aza. It works, actually.

[a-polite-melody]

…Jan

[ladyantiheroine]

Edo

Not bad.

[featherdust]

Awi. Not pleased

[hausofbhd]

[sickthot]

Witnesses say they asked Britney why she shaved her head and her response was, “I’m tired of plugging things into it. I’m tired of people touching me.”

i can never not reblog this

[britneyjustin]

T-Pain: “That was the most beautiful thing in the world. Do you know why she was shaving her head? Because it was so important to other people. She is like, “Listen. Don’t touch my hair anymore. Stop touching my hair.” People were like, “We’ve got to make your hair before you go outside. You can’t leave.” She went … “Now I don’t have hair. What you going to do?”

[fieldbears]

The older I get the more her breakdown seems less ‘unbalanced’ and more ‘completely understandable’

[saundering-deactivated20180828]

it’s because other people told you she was unbalanced at a point in your life when you didn’t have the life experience or wisdom to understand otherwise

[the-void-dragons]

As a kid: damn is something wrong with her?

As an adult: damn what is wrong us

[uppityfemale]

If people don’t think women’s bodies are being controlled, they aren’t looking hard enough.

[saphire-dance]

In contrast my husband got a vasectomy and no one even once suggested I might have an opinion on that.

[asingularcanadian]

ok so lemme take a minute here to just be fucking mad as all hell.

I don’t like to butt in on people’s posts, lord knows I don’t like starting shit but lemme take a second to tell y'all about getting ur lady bits put out of comission.

I, at the age of 12 years, was diagnosed with PCOS. For you that don’t know what that is, PCOS, or Poly-Cystic Ovarian Syndrome, is a LIFELONG medical condition where groups of cysts grow on your ovaries causing the production of female hormones in your body to go batshit nuts and cause a whole sideshow of different symptoms such as but not limited to:

Irregular cardiac function (it’s a scary time)

severe weight gain and trouble losing weight (i may eat healthy and work out daily but until I was down to 1-2 meals a day of spinach i wasn’t losing weight)

severe adolescent acne, and adult acne

extra hair on the face, chest, arms, legs, thumbs, belly and back (I shave my face everyday before class and usually before I go to bed)

thinning hair on the scalp due to an excess of male hormones

irregular or no periods 

HEAVY periods

EXTREME PERIOD PAIN

depression and anxiety

pelvic pain

increased risk for type 2 diabetes

Increased for all female reproductive cancers due to infrequency of periods

Now, TMI, but I recently had my first period in 6 FUCKING YEARS. Due to the nature of PCOS generally when you have a period it’s because one of the cysts on your ovaries has burst releasing a flood of hormones into your system as well as built up toxins. Basically, when I had mine my body went into full on panic mode, nausea and vomiting, extreme fatigue, mood swings like you wouldn’t believe, my body went from being relatively alright to the cliffs of fucking Gallipoli in an hour flat. The kicker was on top of all that I had cramping so bad I actually blacked out.  Given that I know this is likely to happen again before I reach menopause, I decided to book an appointment with my local Planned Parenthood (applaud those lovely people and what they do) to see what my options were to make sure it never happens again. After telling me about various hormonal treatments they could prescribe me (not pills but IUDs shots and various other things) I asked them if it was possible for me to get a partial hysterectomy. A partial hysterectomy removes the uterus but keeps the ovaries so that they still are able to produce estrogen. The lady I had the appointment with looked at me with a look of the utmost pity and told me that unfortunately due to my age there would be likely no chance for any doctor to do it. When I pressed her on the topic she said that the most common excuse doctors will give you for it is that you’re too young, you might change your mind and want to have children later in life.  Now I dunno if y’all reading this are currently seeing anything wrong with this scenario here but I was told that I, someone who can’t have kids, doesn’t want kids, has never wanted kids, and would be put at severe risk of life threatening complications, have to have had children before anyone would consider giving me a surgery that not only would undoubtedly improve the quality of my life but also remove

Well, knowing that I wouldn’t be able to get a referral from her during the appointment, I went home and decided to research this bullshit. Turns out that there is something commonly evoked when women want to have any part of their reproductive system put out of commission called the three child rule. Basically if you are young, doctors usually wont let you get either a hysterectomy or a partial hysterectomy UNLESS you have already had three children. 

HOLD THE MOTHERFUCKING PHONE FOR A WHOLE SECOND AND THINK ABOUT THIS

By most doctors standards, YOU are REQUIRED as a woman to PHYSICALLY GIVE BIRTH to at least 3 CHILDREN before you are able to have any of your reproductive system removed or decommissioned. 

And that isn’t even the worst part of it all, these standards DO NOT change when the patient is at high risk for reproductive cancers!

How fucking miserable is it that to take control of your own fucking health in a first world country a woman has to have submitted to the gender roles of having children or actually have contracted cancer or some other immediately life threatening condition.

Meanwhile, the only requirements for men to receive a vasectomy (at least int he states) is that they’re over the age of 18 and are of sound mind and body.

[archers-doodles]

THIS!!!!!

[wingkink]

Therapists are just…. Common sense filters

[wingkink]

Me: yeah so I just don’t have the energy to get up and make myself a sandwich or wait for something to cook so I just. Don’t

Her: why don’t you just eat the sandwich components without putting them together

Me:

Her: you can just eat a handful of cheese and some sandwich meat. You don’t have to make a sandwich.

Me:

Me: what

[cyanoticfallacy-deactivated2018]

Therapists finding loopholes for mental illness things is one of my favorite things about dealing with mental illness because it really helps me understand that just because a reaction is Common doesn’t mean it’s Right. Does doing dishes stress you out a lot? Buy paper plates. Do your obsessive thoughts make you worry about leaving your curling iron on so you drive home from work to check? Just put the curling iron in your purse and bring it to work with you while we work on tackling where this worry comes from. Symptom management doesn’t have to look like drudgery.

[ziggyplayedd]

i used to go days without showering because seeing my body was so upsetting that i would end up spiraling and then i realized i could simply turn the lights out. it took some getting used to but i’ve been showering with the lights off for years and it’s now one of my favorite parts of my day.

do whatever you want nothing is real and there’s no need to inflict unnecessary suffering on yourself just to try to seem “normal”

[biyaself]

I love this post

[jettestblack]

Hmmm

[petrichorepoch]

These kinds of loopholes make life so. Much. Better.

[fuckyeahasexual]

One of my favorite stories is this lady had extremely bad OCD. Every day she’d be late to work because she was convinced that her hair dryer was going to burn down the house so would always have to turn around and check it. Multiple times a day even. A bunch of doctors tied to “fix” her of that fear, until one day she got a doctor that suggested she bring the hair dryer with her. Other doctors were annoyed, saying that wasn’t a the correct way to help, but she gave it a go. When she had that fear, she’d look over and see the hair dryer unplugged in the seat next to her and was able to carry on. I think it’s such a perfect example of actually helping someone instead of forcing them into a neurotypical standard.

[eclecticpersonswondersland]

That story helped me stop repeatedly checking if my front door was locked. Instead of checking that the door was locked over and over I would check my security system app. If it’s on it will alert me if the front door opens.

[daughter-of-rowan]

“…actually helping someone instead of forcing them into a neurotypical standard” should be added to the Hippocratic Oath.

[tickettome-deactivated20171009]

Just got done reading an interesting article about how language affects the way we think and perceive the world. There were some interesting examples. Like how in Spanish, the word bridge is masculine, while in German, it is feminine. So native speakers of these languages describe the same thing differently. Spanish speakers will comment on how strong or sturdy a bridge is, while German speakers will comment on how elegant or beautiful it is. Another example that blew my mind was the Guugu Yimithirr language. So, most languages, including English, use an egocentric type of directional language (turn right, left, behind, in front.) these directions are relative to you as a person. Well, the Guugu Yimithirr language uses fixed geographical directions (North, East, South, and West) no matter the context. If you were to put an English speaker and a Guugu Yimithirr speaker in the same hotel, and put them in rooms opposite sides of the hallway from each other, the English speaker will see the exact same room (that person will see the desk to the right of blah and the closet in front of blah) but the Guugu Yimithirr speaker will see a COMPLETELY different room because the bed will be facing south instead of north, and all of that jazz. And the article went on to state how speakers of this language might even have a lower sense of egotism, because directions do not revolve around them, they’re just another part of the picture. Really fascinating. It made me think really long about language imperialism and how rapidly we’re moving towards a world that deals almost exclusively in English. It makes me sad to know that we’re losing completely different ways of thinking. Completely different perspectives, just gone. I guess that’s why I always get upset when people say that language imperialism isn’t so bad, and that English as a language is connecting people together. The world is a great big place, with completely different perspectives, and I think the fastest way to kill a culture is to take away the language, because not only are you taking away a method of communication, but a way of thinking.