✨dumpster cat✨

[frontmansdefender]

[yujateaandpi]

Was driving with my grandmother and in broken English she says “no eyes… no nose… no face. Don’t trust.” To which I looked around wildly in search of this omen of ill portend.

Cybertruck. It was a cybertruck.

[jirai-boys-tears]

can I kill myself not like permanently just like a day to make a statement on how upset I am

[ecceagnesdarling]

Dating and marriage is so scary. What if he looks at me and is only able to see "catholic ✅️ not bad looking ✅️ good with kids ✅️" so he decides I'll do and starts acting the way he expects me to want him to act and then I don't notice and get married but he doesn't like me specifically, he just didn't dislike me and I happened to be there, so we spend our days solving the normal issues that show up until we burn out of this and start fighting about dishes and the kid's behavior, nothing truly bad, but since he never liked me specifically, the mundane kinda sucks and we'll be told all marriages are like that because taking care of a house and raising kids is hard by itself and we'll to believe that the dishes and the time it takes to get ready to mass really are to blame and we never solve anything and we really start to believe this is how things goes and I'm just feeling sad because I have too high ideals for happiness and I should just accept that arguing about the washing machine will just be part of my routine now and other woman have it so much worse, it's just the washing machine

[system-of-7]

Gotta have your daily affirmations

[dogpuppy]

[thememedaddy]

[t00thpasteface]

literally no better feeling than blurting out some loud dumbass joke with your buddies and hearing a total stranger ugly-snort-laugh as they walk past bc their own laughter caught them by surprise. find joy and connection in the spontaneity of strangers you son of a bitch. i fucking got your ass

[cipheramnesia]

This is what it's like when I say the dumbest things imaginable to my wife or partner in the checkout lines to see if the cashier will crack a smile. A little human connection between the drudgery.

[flarenoveau]

A few years ago when my little sister was maybe ten or so we went to this like, novelty/antiques store which had an impressive amount of really bad taxidermy. We were sort of doing our own things and I was across the room from her so when she spots this horrible fish she has to run over and yell “ come see the ugliest taxidermied old fish I’ve ever seen “ at me. Without even thinking I just said “you’re the ugliest taxidermied old fish I’ve ever seen.” Which got a snort from an old man across the room. Anyways a few minutes later my stepmom came in and my sister said the same thing to her, and without missing a beat my stepmom deadpans “your father’s the ugliest taxidermied old fish I’ve ever seen”. The old guy absolutely LOST it

[my-dailydreams]

[feraldumpstercat143]

uh actually this man isnt real. I dont belive it. hes not a real person. nope.

[goth-queen]

[sokkas1mp]

ahhahaha tokkaaaaaaa all of this is so them and i like to sit down and just think about it

[thememedaddy]

[manipulated-pieces]

Why is it easier and more comfortable to sit in a position that actively damages my joints than it is to just sit with okay posture. Why does my body crave its own destruction

[funny-tik-toks]

[taproot-bread]

You know that weird phase where you are not asleep yet but your mind starts doing whatever and you can't really control it? Yeah.

[taproot-bread]

[taproot-bread]

I'M????????????

[swayerto]

[thememedaddy]