having unwashed hair will have you believing shit like i can’t be saved
Today's Document

oozey mess
we're not kids anymore.

#extradirty

Love Begins
Cosimo Galluzzi

JVL

if i look back, i am lost
tumblr dot com
No title available
h
occasionally subtle

izzy's playlists!

pixel skylines
Not today Justin
No title available
Three Goblin Art
Sweet Seals For You, Always

No title available
ojovivo
seen from Denmark
seen from Malaysia

seen from United States

seen from Malaysia

seen from United States
seen from United States

seen from United Kingdom
seen from United States
seen from Spain

seen from Spain

seen from Spain
seen from Spain
seen from United States

seen from Malaysia

seen from Spain

seen from Spain
seen from Spain
seen from Spain

seen from Spain
seen from United Kingdom
@findmecallingyou
having unwashed hair will have you believing shit like i can’t be saved
GBBO: “A s’more is basically just an Italian merengue sandwiched between two ganache-covered digestives”
Americans:
in case anyone in wondering, this is Paul Hollywood's idea of a s'more
You know what, their absolute inability to grasp Mexican foods makes more sense every day
Nodding my head in support of the Americans despite having no clue what a s’more is.
Okay, American immigrant to the UK here to explain all the mistakes from Paul Hollywood happening here: there is one fundamentally American ingredient required to make a s'more correctly but which is basically not available anywhere at all in the UK, and that is graham crackers. A plain digestive biscuit close-ish, but still a very different beast.
From Wikipedia: A graham cracker is a sweet flavored cracker made with graham flour.
The next ingredient (which is also extremely traditionally American but slightly more variable) is typically Hershey's chocolate, but you could probably swap this out in the UK with any plain chocolate bar.
Last ingredient is big marshmallows, the kind you do the chubby bunny challenge with, like the size of your thumb and twice as thick.
A proper s'more, the most traditional possible variety, involves to graham cracker squares, two slab segments of Hershey's chocolate, and one to two marshmallows depending on your preference for filling and gooeyness. You put a slab of chocolate on one of the graham cracker squares. Your marshmallows should be toasted, usually over a campfire but if you're doing them at home over a gas stove burner is fine, but the fire part is critical. You can toast them to whatever degree you like, some people like them nice and golden brown but still kind of firm in the middle, me personally? I want that bitch to CATCH ON FIRE, I want it gooey and sticky as hell in the middle, crispy and burnt on the outside. Slap that motherfucker on your graham cracker and chocolate square, top with the other one so your marshmallow and chocolate are sandwiched together by graham cracker on the outside. You do this with your freshly toasted marshmallow because ideally it will be hot enough to start to melt the chocolate so it sticks to the marshmallow and the graham cracker and, combined with the gooey marshmallow, it keeps the whole thing together, and for that reason some people will let them sit for a hot second to let the melting process happen (especially if like me you have chocolate on BOTH graham cracker squares, not just one, because you're a sugar fiend), but if you are a young child you do not have that degree of patience and you eat that shit immediately, unmelted chocolate and all. Consume your summer camp delight like a tiny club sandwich, get gooey sticky marshmallow and chocolate all over your hands, and enjoy.
Important note: this is a kids treat. It is a traditional summer camping trip dessert. It should be something any ten year old with adult supervision and access to the ingredients can make (and make a mess of). They're called s'mores because kids always "want s'more". If you are using a blowtorch, chocolate biscuits, and merengue, you are so far beyond the bounds of s'more-hood that you have thoroughly lost the plot. If you offered Paul Hollywood's concoction to an American child and called it a s'more, they'd tell you flat out that not only is it not a s'more, it looks dumb and you didn't do it right because it's not gooey.
the point is the mess. the point is getting to make a food, at age seven, whose two basic food groups are 'sugar' and 'fire'. the other point is that this food item is so crumbly, chaotic, sticky, on fire, and prone to being dropped (outside, in the dark, while you are surrounded by other children who are also sticky and on fire) that your supervisors cannot accurately monitor how many smores you personally have consumed. the point is also that you may get away with a smore that is five blocks of chocolate and two marshmallows if you move fast and let nothing stop you.
if you haven't accidentally yet unrepentantly eaten a chunk of twigs or dirt or a bug that got enmeshed in the creative process around smore number 3st, you are too old to have any legitimate input into what makes a smore.
There's 2 other points that I think are important.
The first is that you don't pull the marshmallow off the roasting stick and somehow put it on the chocolate. Your staging area will look something like this, with the graham crackers and chocolate already set out (though not usually on the fire like this, for us it was always someone's lap or a picnic table or something)
And when your marshmallow has reached appropriate roasting perfection, you use the graham crackers to slide it off the stick.
and ideally, as a CHILD you are using a literal stick. Like you walked around and spent time looking for The Perfect Stick off the ground while the adults set up the fire. It has to be thin enough the marshmallow will fit, sturdy enough that it won't bow, long enough that you won't burn yourself roasting your marshmallow. And preferably doesn't have a lot of bark that's sloughing off, OR so much bar sloughing off you can peel it all back and get to the clean stick under it. If you're smart, you might stick the tip into the fire first to "wash" it/burn off anything that was still lingering, but. well, most kids don't.
When you bite in, the marshmallow and chocolate SHOULD ooze out all over you. If you don't kinda look like this eating it, you've probably done it wrong:
The description of the marshmallows as being either brown on the outside but still firm on the inside or fully melted but burned on the outside is missing the true art: fully molten in the middle, without the black burns. Not to say OP is wrong for preferring the burn! But there is a technique for perfection and it goes like this:
You find a spot, not above all the logs where everyone sticks their marshmallows by default, but at the heart of the fire. Ideally between a couple logs already glowing gold. Something like here:
Below the leaping flame. Near the logs. There's probably only one or two spots good enough for this on any given fire, but that's okay because everyone else is up above. They will get their marshmallows faster. They will be either firm or burned or both. That's not your goal.
Rotate the marshmallow slowly. Ideally come in at an angle so the part closest to the flame is the side, not the tip. The spot closest to the fire is the spot that turns a crispy golden brown, and you want that everywhere, on the tip and around the circle.
You keep going, slowly turning, for several minutes. Several people will rotate in and out of the higher sections, getting their fast delight. Eventually, your marshmallow will start sagging badly, risking falling. Maybe it does fall and got start over. But eventually it will be golden brown all over, and so liquid it no longer clings to the stick. It is ready, finally.
You say "who hasn't gotten one yet?" And deposit it onto their waiting graham crackers and chocolate. You've made an excellent marshmallow. It isn't for you. Get another while you're over by the bags and go back to the heart of the fire.
That's your evening. One, slow, perfect marshmallow at a time, given to whomever still wants s'more. You're making art for children to stuff into their mouths cheerfully. You're watching the movement of the fire and the heat of the logs, like you would if you were maintaining it — maybe you would be, maybe you were the one who built it — but right now that's not the goal. Let someone else put more logs on, while you take only the one stick and find the best spot for it to live.
You will, eventually, finish a marshmallow and find that nobody moves to accept it. Maybe they're all eating right now, or maybe they've gone through so many they're hesitating. Eat your masterpiece then. Enjoy it, the hardest and most perfect result from a fun and beautiful moment. Go back in for another, until you've run out of marshmallows and the fire is too low or until even you are done with s'mores, until you have made enough.
"We don't want a gooey mess" pfft even the artistry studied at the feet of my father is inherently a gooey mess. That's the whole point!
Every word of every addition to this post is both 100% true and Pulitzer Prize winning writing.
#mood today
The convergence
Text of tweet under the cut because it is loooong.
But... Stochastic Parrots.
This is the paper. It's excellent, highly recommend reading it.
I remember reading about Gebru's firing but I had no idea this was the paper she was fired over.
Have you ever run up the stairs on all fours?
Yes
No
listen. I’m all for “writers deserving of having their boundaries respected” but this is so funny to me and like the funniest part is that I don’t think it’s even grounded in reality. like, how are you going to require proof that your readers are in your specific age range? why does it matter to you how old your readers are??? they are???? strangers???? why do you care? how does it affect you? 😭
but to be fair, this is some shit I did when I was 12 and thought I was edgy too. so I get it.
"Wealth isn't "stuff", its the social relationship of command."
Oh fuck thats an amazing point.
I took my little brother (autistic, mostly non verbal) out and he was using his voice keyboard to tell me something, and this little boy (maybe 4 or 5?) heard him and asked me "Is he a robot??" I tried to explain to him that no, he isn't a robot, he just communicates differently, but my darling brother was in the background max volume "I am robot I am robot I am robot I am robot"
My little brother insisted if I was going to post about him, he wanted a cut of the "profits". When I explained to him that Tumblr isn't monetized, and is pretty pointless, he and my older brother pointed out that he'd still be bringing me "fame and notoriety" if the post got "big". So we agreed, if the post hit 10k notes, which seemed extremely farfetched and silly at the time, I'd take my little brother out for sushi (his favorite food) and let him eat as much as he wants.
I guess God wanted the little robot to enjoy some sushi 🍣 🥲
it's
bitch
honestly this post only got funnier with the change in format
World Heritage Post
I’ve never seen a single episode of the pitt but I do think that kind autistic woman should fuck the twitchy drug guy who has the eyes of an abandoned shelter dog
"People don't always respond to trauma the way you expect them to" they said
Yes
Trinity Santos walks into the Pitt everyday with a bucket of unresolved trauma, a toxic yuri situationship, and Dennis Whitaker hanging off her belt like a labubu and still manages to serve cunt
Addams Family Values (1993)
Klimt + The Addams Family
Young people don’t know when I joined this website a decade and a half ago we used to have to walk to the post button and back and it was uphill both ways
Everyone in the notes being like oh yeah the reblog button used to be at the top of the post and you had to scroll back to the top I forgot about that I was just shit posting 😭 how could I forget after my first reblog of Colors of the sky
and of course remember
| when
| | every
| | | reblog
| | | | made
| | | | | the
| | | | | | post
| | | | | | | more
| | | | | | | | squished
| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | d
| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | o
| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | n
| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | '
| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | t
| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | |
| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | f
| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | o
| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | r
| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | g
| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | e
| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | t
| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | |
| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | t
| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | h
| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | i
| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | s
| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | |
| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | s
| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | h
| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | i
| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | t
1st base: raw ethically dubious fucking
2nd base: exist in a public space together
3rd base: you witness me have a real, candid emotion
4th base: I reveal an aspect of my tragic backstory to you