may death treat us fairly

I knit by commission! DM me on here if you're interested! | Call me First. She/her, asexual, white, lesbian. Autism^TM. Notoriously bad at returning messages and clearing out my likes, but I'm currently working on the latter! The backlog is five years deep so I beg your patience. Come and go as you please, but don't be a dick. Spoiler-filled.

[honeycakelion]

hey @ capcom here is an idea for aa7

[captainkirkk]

For your Zuko being unexpectedly polite: Zuko settling into the palace as Fire Lord and being like “I need to make a super good first impression I need to show everyone that I will be a good fire lord and I am a good person™“ and whenever he does that the staff just goes /what/ and blanks so he just?? Tries even harder to be super duper polite??? He has no clue what he’s doing wronG cue frantic letter writing to iroh

To better convey: an already awkward Zuko walking on eggshells around his staff because he Needs to Make A Good First Impression

The palace staff haven’t seen a Fire Lord that’s a semi-decent human being ever. Not in their lifetime. And here is Zuko, as awkward and rough-around-the-edges as he is, doing his best to not only be polite, but Be A Good Ruler.

It’s baffling.

[firsttothedoor]

the politeness freaks them out a little which makes zuko panic and so act even more polite and it just keeps escalating from there somewhere in ba sing se iroh is reading these letters and laughing at his beautiful nephew @captainkirkk

[sandersstudies]

One of the baristas at a nearby Starbucks makes me lose my mind every time I’m there by saying things that are not outside the spectrum of normal human words but are just slightly off-the-wall.

Barista: Welcome to Starbucks, home of delicious, what deliciousness can I put in motion for you today?

Customer: … Can I get a trenta pink drink please?

Barista: Go big or go home, we here at Starbucks appreciate your commitment, what else can I get started for you?

***

Customer: Nitro cold brew with shots of espresso please.

Barista: Brave of you to commit to staying awake for three days, anything else today?

***

Barista: *slams open drive-thru window* HI HOW ARE YOU?

Customer: …I’m pretty good.

Barista: Are you ready to be even better? Because you’re about to be. *hands them their coffee* 

***

Barista, realizing that a drink was made wrong: *slams open window* SO how do you feel about surprises?

Customer: ….they’re okay.

Barista: Great because I’m about to give you one.

***

Barista: You have two drinks so I am going to hand you two straws which means, FANTASTIC news, these straws double as drumsticks. / You have one drink so I am going to hand you one straw and, promise not to tell anyone, this straw doubles as a magic wand.

***

Barista: Here are those cake pops, I plucked them fresh from the tree myself.

***

Barista: *slams open window, holding drink* Amazing, fantastic, delicious, you are a very lucky man/woman!

***

Barista, realizing drink is being delayed or remade: Looks like it’s gonna be just one minute so they have time to put the extra love in.

***

Barista: I’ll be with you in one hot second. *beat* WOW that second sure was hot!

Anyway she has a few dozen catchphrases she rotates approriately and it’s both distracting and fantastic to listen.

[systlin]

Hey y’all what if I told you that there’s a fiction novel out there where a 6 square mile hunk of West Virginia, including a small mining town, is accidentally transported to 1632 Germany due to a cosmic accident.

And the local mining union looks around, goes ‘well shit, guess it’s time to organize everything’ and proceeds to deal with all the incredible bullshit that comes with being dropped into the middle of the 30 years war.

What if I told you it’s free to read online

https://www.baen.com/readonline/index/read/sku/0671578499

[systlin]

“OK but have you considered; fuck all your kings and shit. Toss them the fuck out and rule yourselves.”-United Mine Workers in an alternate timeline

“No but do go on.” German peasants in said alternate timeline

“Fuck.” - every royal in Europse

[systlin]

“Why do you so scandalously show your legs?”- a woman from 1632

“You ain’t never been in West Virginia in the summer, have you honey.” - a couple of blue collar working class girls from the late 20th century

[specsthespectraldragon]

by the same author, TIME SPIKE, where Hernando De Soto gets beaten to death by Native Americans and then fed to dinosaurs, and also the source of my gay awakening.

[systlin]

You had me at “De Soto gets beaten to death by Native Americans and fed to dinosaurs”

[benevolentwanderer]

holy shit people don’t know about the 1632 series? By the way, there are several dozen short story collections (the “grantville gazette”), all fantastic, not to mention the novel-length entries? GO WILD, EVERYONE, there’s so much Great Stuff in there I can’t even decide what to highlight.

[roach-works]

if you like competence porn, women being extremely cool, and people who actually give a fuck about functional governments, the 1632 series is absolutely going to be your jam. 

[artsy-alice]

joint night hunt

i was drawing their big brothers for a commission and this ended up happening ok

“welcome home, wangji! how was the joint night hunt?” “it was fine. i learned the consequences of oversharing.” “o-oh…?”

the series so far: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | ★

[incognitoyee]

Yiling laozu and his girls™

[dies-first]

I haven’t seen this joke yet but lets all pretend gusulan and yumengjiang were cool and helped wens too 🥺❤️

[theoppositeofprofound]

Love Nie Huaisang and Lan Wangji’s wildly different reactions to their brothers’ taking a holy oath of fratrimony.

Nie Huaisang: Excellent, bonus brothers! I expect backdated birthday presents for the last 19 years (a payment plan is also acceptable). I am now unafraid to cry on you in public. 

Lan Wangji: I’ve never heard of Jin Guangyao before in my life. Do not presume to know me. Do not look at me. Nie Mingjue can stay but he’s on thin ice.  

[webofstarwars]

Someone cosplayed as the opening crawl to ANH.

[brawltogethernow]

This photo was obviously taken at a convention, but honestly this is perfectly good streetwear.

[amarcia]

Fey rings, doorways, openings to other worlds.

> Art blog | Illustration tag | Zelda tag | Ko-fi 

Not to break the mood but the comments under my previous loz drawing made me think of modern!Zelda way too much. She comes from a world - or a point in time that has not faced danger for a long while therefore cities and tech developed and therefore Zelda knows no Link. On the other hand Link seeks her out because Zelda of his time has fallen.

[butterflypeaflowertea]

i don’t have a brain actually. my head is just filled with lots and lots of dried flowers

[butterflypeaflowertea]

actually wait rb this w/ what u have inside your head instead of a brain. the people want to know!

[mirrorfalls]

#browser tabs but they’re all crashing #some of them are autoplaying music but it’s not clear which ones

[25436445767787687676786-deactiv]

my favourite Bernini statue isn’t a real statue, but the damaged clay and straw angel that was the model for the bronze statue.

[plantdyke]

Here’s some more of them! The exposed wires in the wings give off such a Vibe

[captain-flint]

Is this not how the scene went after he proposed on the tarmac? 

[whitepeopletwitter]

[swan2swan]

We really don’t talk enough about how Artoo went into the desert to find Obi-Wan because no kid would be stupid enough to follow him into Tusken territory and then this kid chases him down and gets beaten up and his unconscious body is dragged back to his landspeeder and Artoo looked down and went “This one. This one knows how to have a good time.”

[sniperct]

#he’d had adventures but really all those rebels were too cautious for him#he’d served Anakin Skywalker there was just no coming back#and then there’s this nerdy kid who kinda sorta reminds him of that guy#and then Obi-Wan says “your father wanted you to have this” and pulls out ANAKIN’S KRIFFING LIGHTSABER#and Artoo just EXPLODES because NO WAY THIS IS THAT KID??!#and he cross-references his old memory banks and THERE’S PADME NAMING THE KID “LUKE” THIS IS THE KID#THE WHOLE TIME HE WAS TRYING TO RUN AWAY FROM ANAKIN’S SON#NO WONDER HE COULDN’T ESCAPE#also no wonder he could fool this idiot to take off the restraining bolt#HAPPY DAYS ARE HERE AGAIN#and he was ride or die forever#and about two days later he DID die#but he got better#so really WOW this guy IS the best#artoo detoo

[omgthatdress]

this is my new favorite Twitter thread

[neenya]

what if cql faces but mdzs heights??? was my main thesis statement

[g75bxcjh]

i somehow found my way to the “what did the drunkest person at the party last night do?” thread